Becca Bellamy
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The Ghosts of Boyfriends Past - Part 4
🕑 Added 2023-11-03 03:33:25 +0000 UTC"So, that's everything," Charlotte said as she finished detailing her recent hauntings.
Dr. Milford took off her glasses, set them down on the table in front of her along with her notepad, and took a deep breath. "I'll be honest, Charlotte, I've never heard of anything like this before. I've certainly heard of women manifesting fantasies prior to getting married. I've had patients who didn't realize they were in a bad relationship until they started having dreams of a certain type. What you're experiencing seems to be different, though."
They certainly didn't feel like dreams. Not to Charlotte. They'd continued to happen in her sleep, but they'd become prevalent during her waking hours, too. Even after she'd said Dave's name while fucking her fiancée. Even after Reese had shown a surprising level of interest in the fact that other men were popping into Charlotte's head - and what felt like her life - at random times.
"Am I being haunted?" Charlotte asked. "I mean, I know ghosts aren't real and that all these guys are still alive so they couldn't be ghosts even if ghosts were real, but am I being haunted?"
Dr. Milford smiled. "I don't think so, no. But, I'm a doctor, not a spiritualist. I do have a question, though. One that I want you to seriously consider."
Charlotte took a deep breath. "Okay."
Dr. Milford leaned closer, clasped her hands, and asked, "Are you absolutely certain that Reese is the right man to marry? Because in all honesty, the only reason I could see for your mind to conjure such lurid, lifelike hauntings - if that's what we're calling them - would be if there's some part of your subconscious that's absolutely certain you shouldn't be marrying Reese."
It wasn't the first time Charlotte had considered the notion. During her last session with Dr. Milford the notion that Reese might not be right for her had been implied, at least that he might not be the perfect long term sexual partner for her. Charlotte hadn't yet fully confronted the possibility that he wasn't the right husband for her, though.
"I think, at this point, that I'm willing to admit that Reese is not the ideal sexual partner for me," Charlotte said. She paused for a moment and then added, "Wow, honestly, just saying that...it's like something has been lifted. Like a weight of some kind."
"And do you feel like these hauntings are what's made that clear?" Dr. Milford asked. "These vivid visions of...well, let's call them alpha males from your past, has it felt as though they're really just pointing out where you feel Reese is lacking?"
Once Charlotte heard it pointed out, it seemed so obviously true that she was astounded she hadn't immediately jumped to that conclusion.
"That feels true," she said. "I mean, I feel terrible saying that Reese is lacking in any way, but there's no question that he doesn't fully satisfy my sexual needs." Though she was in the safe space of her therapist's office, that didn't stop Charlotte from experiencing guilt as she openly criticized the man she loved.
Charlotte looked at her therapist and remembered the story Dr. Milford had told of surrendering to her desires and cheating on her fiancée with a young, cocky alpha male that showed a great deal of desire for her. She couldn't help but want to know more.
"You never...you never wanted to experience the kind of sex you had before you got married...the kind you had with the guy that you...well, that you cheated with?" Charlotte asked. "After you got married, you never wanted to have that kind of sex again? You did it once and your body just...I don't know, just put aside those desires?"
Dr. Milford smiled, looked away for a few moments, and then turned her attention back to Charlotte. "I'm not going to lie to you, Charlotte. From time to time I feel that desire. I felt it more when I was younger, of course, but it still crops up every now and then. Sometimes I can convince my husband to serve that desire by stepping outside his sexual comfort zone. Sometimes it just goes away. Sometimes I suppose you could say I indulge in a little bit of fantasy and that helps quench that temporary thirst."
Charlotte couldn't help but think of her therapist masturbating as she fantasized about the kind of men that had been popping into Charlotte's head at the most inappropriate times. Under different circumstances it would have been an uncomfortable vision, but in that moment Charlotte actually felt a deep bond with Dr. Milford.
"To be honest, I think the notion that anyone - man or woman - can literally have it all is a deeply unhelpful falsehood. You can have a great many of things you want. You can probably have almost all of the things you want. But to think that you can have it all is a little bit insane. Ultimately, I spend most of my days feeling like I have everything I want, and every once in a while I feel a need that my husband can't quite satisfy. I find a way to take care of that need without betraying him and life goes back to being really rather blissful."
Dr. Milford's honesty was both surprising and deeply comforting, so much so that Charlotte thought she might get an honest answer to the question that popped into her head as she sat and listened to her therapist.
"Do you think it would be dumb of me to have sex with someone else?" Charlotte asked.
Dr. Milford's eyebrows lifted just a little before she gained control of her reaction, took a moment to consider the question, and said, "Possibly. It seems that Reese isn't necessarily put off by the fact that you're thinking about other men, but actually having sex with another man would be something else entirely, and I can't endorse cheating on him even if it's something I did. I'm not exactly proud of the fact that I cheated and I got lucky that it all worked out for me. It might not work out for you."
She paused, took a breath, and then leaned forward a little and continued with what looked to Charlotte like a hint of amusement in her eyes. "On the other hand, the intensity of your hauntings makes me wonder if there would be some value if actually exploring your desires. I can't recommend it because it could be so destructive, but I guess I wouldn't call it dumb. It really depends on what you want to prioritize. If maintaining your relationship with Reese is your number one goal, then don't have sex with someone else. If figuring out what's going to make you happy long term is your goal, then perhaps consider it, and perhaps do so in consultation with Reese to gauge his feelings on the matter."
Charlotte imagined trying to tell Reese that she wanted to have sex with someone else. She wasn't the slightest bit certain how that conversation would go, and yet she was suddenly quite certain she needed to have that conversation with him, for she wasn't sure that a lifetime of wondering whether or not she needed a different - and perhaps better - kind of sex seemed impossibly frustrating.
"You're going to do it, aren't you?" Dr. Milford asked.
"I think so, yes," Charlotte replied. The truth was, she was absolutely going to talk to Reese about it. She had to. Charlotte was turned on just thinking about it. She couldn't deny her desires. She couldn't deny what her hauntings had seemingly unlocked. She just couldn't. It was already clear that she'd regret it if she did.
"Well, as unconventional as this is, feel free to call me if you need help with anything before our next session. I'm not sure what assistance I could offer, but I'm more than willing to listen," Dr. Milford said.
Charlotte smiled brightly. "I really appreciate that. Hopefully I won't need to, but I will absolutely get in touch if I need help."
---
The hauntings kept happening. At least once a day, sometimes two or three times. Always in Charlotte's dreams, too. One morning an ex-boyfriend bent her over the bathroom sink and took her from behind. She had multiple hauntings at work, almost always involving an ex-boyfriend fucking her on or bent over her desk. She experienced a haunting in a restaurant once, though in that case it was an ex-boyfriend vigorously fingering her while whispering in Charlotte's ear about how badly he wanted to fuck her the moment they were done eating.
Each and every time, Charlotte was desperately aroused by the time the haunting ended. In some cases that meant she would find a quiet spot and masturbate, but after confessing the hauntings to Reese, he proved more than willing to offer his tongue and fingers whenever Charlotte reached that state of desire while he was around.
It was Reese's continued willingness to help - and his obvious arousal at doing so - that led Charlotte to believe he might be receptive to the idea of her actually fucking someone else. Charlotte worried that she was being selfish, that Reese would be outraged at the idea of her fucking someone else, that she was well and truly insane to think he'd have even the slightest interest in her doing so, but she largely ignored those worries, in no small part because the hauntings were becoming more frequent and were on the verge of being a real problem.
A few days after her therapy session, Charlotte found the courage to talk to Reese. She made dinner for them and they shared a bottle of wine, which left her feeling a little bit buzzed and imbued with an unearned sense of confidence that he might actually be into her exploring sex with someone else.
"I had another haunting today," she said as they cuddled up on the couch.
An excited look crossed Reese's face and Charlotte smiled.
"It happened in the car, actually. At a red light. I felt his hand on my leg. I felt it run under my skirt. I felt his fingers in my pussy. He kissed me. He nibbled on my ear lobe in the way I love. He told me how badly he wanted me, how badly he wanted me to pull the car over so he could fuck me in the backseat," she explained.
"Have you ever had sex in a car?" Reese asked.
Charlotte caressed his thigh as she nodded. "The summer after my freshman year I dated a guy named Ryan. He had a truck, actually, so there was no backseat, but we fucked in that truck a lot, mostly because it was the only place we could get any privacy."
"Was it...was it good sex?" he asked.
Charlotte smiled and ran her fingers towards his crotch. She was pleased to find that his dick had already grown a little. She caressed it through his jeans and said, "It was great sex, actually. He was young, and strong, and he fucked with confidence. He was...well, he was very well-endowed, too, if I remember correctly. Most of the time I was on top, but every once in a while I'd get on my back. There were actually a few times where we parked in a private enough place that we had sex in the truck bed, too."
Reese was hard as a rock by that point and Charlotte even spotted a small wet spot in his pants from the precum. "And was he the one haunting you today? Was he...was he fingering you? Was he the one telling you how badly he wanted to fuck you?"
Charlotte has masturbated in her car - doing so while driving, in fact - and cum hard enough to drive away her desire, but it was building up all over again, in no small part because of Reese's genuine lust.
"I don't actually know," she said. "He wasn't there long enough. He's the one I thought about when I...well, when I masturbated to an orgasm."
Reese turned, looked at her, and leaned in for a kiss. Charlotte parted her lips and welcomed his tongue into her mouth and she moaned when his hand moved under her sweater and played with her tits in the soft, sheer bra she'd worn to work that day.
"Wait, wait," she said before getting completely lost in her desire. "There's actually something we need to talk about."
Reese pulled back with a smile. "Sorry. You're just so...so irresistible."
"It really doesn't bother you that I'm thinking about other men all the time?"
He looked a little embarrassed and turned away for a moment before saying, "Should it?"
Charlotte reached up to turn his face back towards her and caressed his cheek. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad, Reese, and I'm not saying it should. I'm really not. It's just a little unusual, is all, and I just wanted to check in."
He leaned in, kissed her softly, and confessed, "It doesn't bother me. I imagine it's pretty obvious that it seems to excite me."
Charlotte smiled and stroked his stiff cock through his jeans. "Yes, that is rather obvious." Then she released his cock from her grasp, leaned back, and looked away as she gathered the courage to say what she wanted - what she needed - to say. "The thing we need to talk about...that I want to talk about, I mean..."
Reese reached out and took his hand in hers. "You can say it. Whatever it is."
Charlotte turned back to her fiancée, took a deep breath, and said, "I want to have sex with someone else."
He looked surprised. Stunned, even. Genuinely so, like what she'd said was the last thing he expected to hear. He seemed to have been stunned into silence, too, as long seconds passed without Reese offering a word in response.
"Who?" Reese finally asked.
"I don't know yet. I wanted to...I know this sounds insane, but I wanted to see how you felt about it before I gave it any more thought."
Again Reese was silent, though this time Charlotte felt like she could see the gears turning in his brain. "What are you hoping to...I don't know, to experience? Is it...do you want to have the kind of sex you've been having in your hauntings?"
Charlotte nodded.
There was a momentary look of pain on Reese's face. "The kind of sex we don't have."
She nodded again. There was no point in sugarcoating it.
"And...and so you want to have that kind of sex with someone else. You want someone else to...to fuck you differently, or better I guess, than I do," he continued.
Charlotte nodded again.
"And you want to know how I feel about that? About you having good sex with someone else? The kind of sex that I can't give you," he said.
He'd found a way of simplifying her thoughts in a manner she hadn't yet managed and Charlotte couldn't help but appreciate that, though she couldn't actually tell how Reese felt about it.
Instead of saying another word, Reese pulled Charlotte's hand between her legs. She was surprised to feel an erection. A remarkably stiff erection, in fact.
"Does that mean..."
Reese nodded.
"Are you sure?" she asked.
He nodded again.
"I love you, Charlotte. I want...no, I need you to be happy. You deserve to be happy. I don't really know what's going on with these hauntings and what's really driving them, but it seems pretty clear that you're not nearly as happy with our sex life as you could be. I'll admit that under normal circumstances I would probably suggest that we talk about breaking up, but to be honest, I'm really turned on right now, and I get really turned on when you tell me about one of your hauntings, and I got really turned on listening to you talk about fucking your ex-boyfriend in his truck."
Charlotte felt love. Pure, unbridled love for Reese. How could she not love a man that saw her so clearly, that was wiling to let her try and figure out what she needed from their relationship, that was willing to let her explore having sex with another man, that was turned on by the idea of her doing so?
"Take your pants off," she said.
For a split second Reese looked surprised, but he quickly stripped out of his pants as Charlotte peeled off her leggings and panties. She straddled her fiancée, guided his cock into her pussy, and sat down on him as their lips met for a deep kiss.
"Oh, fuck," he said as Charlotte began to ride him. "Charlotte, fuck, you feel so good."
"That's what Ryan used to say when I'd ride his big cock in his truck," she replied with a smile. "He'd tell me how good my pussy felt, how good it felt to be so deep inside me."
Pure pleasure washed over Reese's face and Charlotte rode him faster. She was fascinated with his desire and she couldn't help but feed off of it. Grinding her clit into his pelvis felt damn good, too, and she couldn't help but indulge in thoughts of Ryan, almost like she was conjuring her very own haunting.
"Do you wish...do you wish you were with him right now?" Reese asked.
Charlotte ran her fingers through his hair as she rode her fiancée's cock slowly. "Yes. I wish I was fucking Ryan right now. I wish it was his cock inside me instead of yours. I wish it was his long, thick cock in my pussy, Reese. I wish it was his strong hands moving down my back and grabbing my ass. I wish it was him about to cum deep inside me."
She could see that Reese was on the verge of an orgasm. Charlotte was close, too, so she rode him a little faster. She ground her clit hard into his pelvis, generating a wealth of friction.
"Your pussy feels so good, baby."
It was Ryan's voice. It was as clear as day in Charlotte's head.
"Ride me. Ride me with that perfect tight pussy of yours, Charlotte. Ride me and make me cum inside you."
She looked down and saw Ryan, not Reese. She saw his smile. She saw his beautiful eyes. She saw his hair. She felt his remarkably strong hands on her ass. She wanted him. She craved him. He felt so good inside her. So much better than Reese's cock had felt.
"Cum inside me, Ryan. Cum in my pussy. Fuck...cum in my pussy and make me cum so hard all over your big cock."
Charlotte came. Ryan came. Reese came.
She closed her eyes and her haunting and reality mixed. Ryan and Reese both moaned as they filled her pussy with cum. Charlotte's whole body trembled from the intense pleasure of her orgasm, leaving her lightheaded as her toes and fingers tingled delightfully.
"Wow," she said between deep, heavy breaths.
"I know," Reese replied.
Charlotte opened her eyes and saw her fiancée smiling at her.
"Was he here? Was that why you said his name?"
"Yes," Charlotte answered.
They kissed. It was a long, slow, beautiful kiss. A romantic kiss. Not the kind of kiss they would have shared if Reese was angry or sad in the aftermath of his orgasm.
"This might be the craziest thing I've ever said, Charlotte, but I want you to have sex with another man, especially if it will help quell these hauntings you're having," Reese said softly.
"Thank you, Reese," she replied. "I will. Have sex with someone else, I mean. I'm going to. I don't know when and I don't know who, but I'm going to."
It was an odd thing to say with her fiancée's cock still inside her, but Charlotte was absolutely going to have sex with another man.
