MarvinKnight
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Feedback from 'What do you want to see in book 4?':
🕑 Added 2024-08-02 16:31:30 +0000 UTCAlright guys, I've been reading all the 'What do you want to see in book 4' comments and I've done my best to consolidate and organize the feedback into something a little more manageable. I usually keep this to myself, but there was a lot this time. There's enough to make a post about it, so I think I will just to give you guys a last look at what I'm working with in case you guys thought of anything else, and also as a bit of a sneak-peak at my writing process behind the scenes.
I think I've consolidated everything that two or more people mentioned. Some of this stuff is definitely planned for book 4 already. Others only maybe, but I could tilt the story in that direction. I can't promise that everything you guys have asked for will make it into the series, but accurately predicting what readers' like is the lion's share of good writing, and this is one of my few opportunities where I can simply ask you guys.
What do you guys think? Did I hit the nail on the head with these notes or am I way off the mark?
The explicit spiciness levels in particular are probably the most important thing thing to get right, but everything is important.
Consolidated feedback:
Remaining plotlines to be tied up:
Meet Sakura's father.
Find Sheriff Drayton's surviving policemen.
Meet Lyra (Reaper of the System) again.
Fufill Carter's promise to revive Ben and the others.
Deal with the negative effects of his Death Curse.
Who built the golems on the golem shard?
What's in the bag Carter got from Morgathor?
How does Cyra feel about Carter?
On explicit content:
Sex level can be turned up slightly. On a scale of asexual vocel murderhobo to mafia romance turboslut, the last book was a 2 and can be comfortably turned up to a 5.
In practice, this means fewer snake and rotting monster corpse enemies, and more sexy elf, kitsune, and succubus enemies. Both allies and enemies may have clothing that rips during a fight. In general, the number of beautiful, attractive women will soar.
Kink level can be turned up slightly. On a scale of Blues Clues to Gor, the last book was a 2 and can be comfortably turned up to a 4.
In practice, this means that there will be more attractive allies and enemies who may more eagerly make themselves available to the MC, either in surrender or to secure his assistance. This will still avoid any noncon situations, but there may be some stuff that very stringent people might consider dubcon or unequal relationships (like the princess of a fallen shard offering to have Carter's children if he'll agree to an alliance where he protects her people.)
Content people want to see:
Plotlines:
Explore ties with the Dragon Lodge and their worlds.
Have Carter see a higher-level theory crafter so he can rework his class and race to a higher level of combat.
A little more solo leveling for Carter. Maybe with some time skips to speed through a few integrations of weaker enemies.
Help Cyra secure and expand Samhain territory on Themyscira.
People:
Spend more time exploring Reluna.
Another (longer) romance arc for Bridget.
Check in with the criminals in the swamp.
Many requests for Dragon girl GF. Potential air support?
See the Governess AI controlling Carter's mannequin puppets.
Additional species requests: Kitsune, cat girls, yokai, etc.
Meet other non-hostile potential ally races.
Spend more time with Gobgob and expand her role.
Abilities:
Upgrade Share Curse, Power of Nature, and Fabulous Phallus.
Requests for female Sharky who is sexy and hungry for cock instead of souls.
Faction Building:
Expand Carter's exploitation of modern industrial processes combined with magic to grant greater advantages. (Power armor incoming, maybe?)
Deepen ties with the Dragon Lodge.
More city building stuff. Growing Crownhill. Expanding across additional shards.
General Writing Style feedback:
Be more generous with alternate POV chapters, especially for harem members and potential harem members.
Requests for a potential brief side story, featuring either the girls or another character in the world like Carter who is successful in his own right.
Comments
Matt Geller
Maybe add members to Carter’s harem from various other races across the multiverse as well as including the Goddess in Jade, maybe a cultivator or 2, plus lol maybe Lyra and a system AI, this would allow Carter to have the ability to balance the system and the cultivators like the scales of Justice. Helping to get the system back to doing what it was originally intended to do. Between the system and the cultivators in his harem, Carter could potentially become the single most powerful individual in the Multiverse and his harem the driving force to right the wrongs.
hawkshe .
It'd be nice if he had a more balanced party in the future. Right now he has 3 melee dps and he's a magical dps, making it very lopsided. Where's the tank, healer or support class? Also, someone to keep track of the bigger picture in battle would likely do them well since right now he's the most level-headed in the group and he enters a magical rage anytime things get dangerous. Then there's the fact that the mc has no one in the harem who shares his hobbies or skills in any way, not even as a friend. It'd be great if there was someone in the group he could actually talk with and bounce ideas back and forth with. Right now he's the only mage surrounded by meatheads and while that works for now, I'd imagine it'd get a bit lonely and isolating long-term.
Lazai
I would definitely like more city-building and growing crownhill into more shards. I like how Carter set it up such that the day-to-day stuff is done by the council. Maybe a little more of the broad strokes like you’ve been doing. For example, building and upgrading crownhill itself from a post-apocalyptic hodgepodge (at least that’s how I imagine it) to something more planned specifically to the current needs. I like the golems that he created. I would love to see the industrialization of the magic economy (power armor!? When?). Also, is that ‘kingdom-building game’ any specific irl game or just something generic? Please no female sharky.
