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Uma Musume Pretty Derby: To The Basement [317]
🕑 Added 2025-11-13 18:11:30 +0000 UTC“So that’s how it is...”
Fortune rested her chin in her hand, tilting her head with her eyes closed, as if seriously weighing whether possessing Gold Ship would be the better option.
But after careful thought, she shook her head: “No.”
“Why?!” Gold Ship blurted, startling Mizuno beneath her.
“My conditions are way better than his! Why pick him, not me?!”
“Kid, it’s not as simple as you think.” Fortune shrugged helplessly, explaining,
“The job of an servant needs compatibility. It’s not just about who’s physically stronger or who’s tougher and can suffer more…”
“It’s like surviving on a deserted island—you can last a little longer if you’re strong, handle basic danger. But that’s not what decides who escapes the island in the end.”
“The ones who really get out alive rely on a mix of luck and the will to never give up, even staring at a hopeless future.”
“And based on my calculations, if I possessed you, our chance of beating Misfortune would be...”
“Zero.” Fortune formed her fingers into a circle as she spoke.
“How is that possible—” Gold Ship frowned, grabbing Mizuno’s face as she pressed on, “And what about him? Don’t tell me his chance is zero too?!”
Fortune looked at Mizuno for a moment, then straightened her finger from the circle:
“He’s a one.”
Mizuno’s face twisted into something odd.
He got what Fortune meant: “your odds are lower than his.” But why did it sound so off? Like those numbers in BL where one is the top and zero’s the bottom…
“So you’re saying his odds are one hundred percent?” Gold Ship was shocked.
Because in probability, one meant 100%, guaranteed outcome.
If that was true, she could finally relax about Mizuno’s safety, no longer needing to pressure him to hand over the servant role, or try to take it herself.
But Fortune shook her head: “No.”
“Strictly speaking, out of 14,006,005 possible futures, I see him succeeding once.”
Mizuno’s face got even stranger.
What, was she the Doctor Strange of this world? Was she going to stick up one finger at the final battle and send him off to go down with the big boss?
“Isn’t that basically zero?!” Gold Ship’s relief snapped right back, hugging Mizuno even tighter.
“Relax—if he fails, there’s still a tiny, tiny chance he won’t die.”
“A tiny chance?!” Gold Ship’s worry deepened, teeth gritted as she pressed further:
“Then if he doesn’t become your servant, what’s his survival rate?”
“Hmm... If he switches sides and becomes Misfortune’s servant, he probably won’t die—he’ll just get Uma Pyoi'd by Misfortune every day.” Fortune shrugged.
Gold Ship froze, then stared at Mizuno in a hollow daze.
“You, go switch sides.”
“No way!” Mizuno shot back without thinking, glaring at Fortune.
“Hey! Fortune! Weren’t you supposed to help me talk Broshi down? Not make things worse by explaining everything and making it even more awkward?!”
“Oh—right!” Fortune’s body jolted, suddenly remembering whose side she was on.
“Sorry, forgot. Ehehe~” She stuck out her tongue in embarrassment.
“Wow! You!” Mizuno was about to blow a fuse at her feeble attempt to act cute.
Useless boss! All she did was make things worse!
“Mizuno-dono, go switch sides.” Gold Ship pinched Mizuno’s mouth, threatening, “If you don’t, I’ll Uma Pyoi you to death!”
“Calm down, Broshi!” Mizuno waved his hands in panic. “It’s really not that complicated! I’m still pretty safe!”
“Safe? The goddess said you have a tiny chance of surviving!” Gold Ship’s voice trembled, tears pooling at her eyes.
“If I lose you, what do I do...”
Mizuno went silent at Gold Ship’s pained expression.
He hesitated, then clutched his chest, gaze firm, and promised sincerely:
“Don’t worry, Broshi! I promise you—I absolutely won’t get killed! I’ll live to be your bro for a hundred years—no, for ten thousand years!”
“What good’s your promise?” Gold Ship punched the heart-shaped pillow under Mizuno’s head in a burst of rage, her fist going straight through.
A cloud of white feathers exploded from the ripped pillow, drifting around the bed, swirling around the human, the goddess, and the Uma Musume.
“You can’t even fight back when I’m about to Uma Pyoi you—how can you protect your own life?” Gold Ship pressed.
“Uh...” Mizuno was stumped, unable to answer.
“I’m giving you two options.” Gold Ship held up two fingers.
“One, ditch that useless Fortune goddess, and come with me to switch sides. Even if you get Uma Pyoi'd, as long as you’re alive, that’s what matters—dead, you’ve got nothing…”
“Or, you leave me something to remember you by.”
“Remember?” Mizuno echoed, confused. “What do you mean, remember?”
“It means…” Gold Ship’s furious face gradually turned red, the shame clear—but her desire still forced her to blurt it out:
“You give me a litter of foals!”
“Cough—cough—cough!” Mizuno nearly choked to death, as if lightning had struck him.
What?! Did he just hear that right?
Have kids with Broshi?!
“Broshi! No! Two guys can’t have kids together!”
“Hm?!” Gold Ship’s eyes flashed dangerously.
“No, no!” Mizuno caught himself, instantly correcting, “I mean, we’re sworn brothers, like family—how could we cross that line? It would ruin our pure bond!”
“I don’t care!” Gold Ship bit down on Mizuno’s lower lip, mumbling,
“If you want to stay as Fortune’s servant, then prove you can get away from me right now—otherwise, today I’m jumping you for real!”
“Gah!”
But just as Gold Ship reached to yank down Mizuno’s pants, the room’s gentle white light switched to a piercing red, and an alarm started beeping from a tiny speaker in the wall.
“What’s this?!” Gold Ship’s horse ears shot straight up, brow furrowing at the ceiling.
A flashing red light in a room meant only one thing…
“An intruder?”
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This is a fan translation of 赛马娘，从入门到地下室 by EEEEE然后亮标 All rights to the original work belong to the creator. Please support them by exploring their original work or sharing it with others if you can. Thank you for reading and supporting my efforts to bring this story to a wider audience!
Comments
Matthew Coccaro
Inb4 Rice Shower attempts to murder Golshi
