peachesatdusk
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APV | CH 67
🕑 Added 2023-03-27 08:12:01 +0000 UTCA haughty person born as the daughter of a noble family, and the only ducal lady of House Everett—that was her. S was raised to be someone who’d hog the love of all the people around her, raised to stand alone above heaven and earth proudly with her head up high.
“It feels like I have a younger sister now. I’m so happy! I’ll take care of you.”
The small, insignificant world wherein Aileen lived collapsed that very day.
Until that moment, she did not know that it was already starting, but this was when she became aware of her inferiority complex.
She did not even know what this inferiority complex was at first, and so, she admired the older girl in the beginning.
That girl was someone who lived proudly with the noble and dignified appearance—that Aileen could never have.
But then, since when was it.
“Milady, you should have been the Ducal Lady…”
That’s supposed to be my place…
“My poor daughter. My poor Young Miss.”
What was it about that damn girl’s bloodline…
“It’s originally mine. That’s my place…”
I hate you. I despise you. I loathe you for stealing what’s mine. The love you’re receiving, the attention you’re getting, the position that you have.
‘Everything’s supposed to be mine.’
It was unknown when exactly this twisted notion had taken place in her mind, but gradually, that idea grew in size.
The splendid life of a ducal lady. The variety of dishes on the fancy dinner table. Those luxurious dresses. The fact that she could get all the jewelry that she wanted, the fact that people had no choice but to admire her.
That place is supposed to be mine.
That place must be mine.
This was the faithful day that the beloved child had lost everything.
“From now on, you’re my family, too.”
The child had to learn to survive in the unfamiliar world she had been thrusted into.
Even if the method she had chosen was wrong.
* * *
The wheels of the carriage continued rolling.
It’s true that they had used the warp gate, but the gate itself wasn’t situated in the capital, so they had to go the long way by carriage some distance more until they could reach their destination.
Some distance away, the escort knights were on horseback as they guarded the entourage.
Roen looked over at Violet, who looked a little pale due to the side effects of going through the warp gate. A little awkwardly, he asked if she was doing alright, but the only answer he received was a cold look.
Alone together in that carriage, the two of them were silent.
Violet was looking out the window blankly, resting her chin on one hand. Meanwhile, Roen could only cough in vain, unable to dissipate the awkwardness between them.
The time they had together was uncomfortable. In Violet’s perspective, Roen’s self-conscious disposition reminded her of a puppy that needed to go potty.
“……”
“……”
The silence between them stretched on for a long time. Back when they were at the ducal residence, Roen had looked for any excuse to talk to Violet at the annex whenever he was bored. Now, however, he could not alleviate the stifling atmosphere as they were all alone.
Since it’s come to this, why was he so dogged in his insistence to be closer to her? Violet inwardly clicked her tongue.
Eventually defeated by the awkward silence, Roen was the first to surrender and speak up.
“Violet, to you…”
Hearing his low voice, Violet sat up and took her chin off her hand, then looked at Roen.
He faced her purple eyes, but he soon avoided his gaze before continuing to speak.
“All that time… Didn’t it feel unfair to you?”
In the end, the topic that he brought up was a tedious one.
Violet mulled over the question. Should she answer or not?
While thinking, Violet looked out the window, where the roads could be seen flitting by.
“Even if it felt unfair to me, what could I have done?”
“……”
The answer rendered him speechless.
Even more, Roen could not muster the courage to look at his younger sister.
He had been much too harsh to an eight-year-old.
Children were prone to fighting, but Violet ended up being responsible for everything. He had assumed that it was normal for Violet to be scolded.
He thought that it was natural, even if she had only been eight.
Realizing now that what he thought was normal was, in fact, not normal… How did it feel?
“…I’m sorry.”
“I’ve already lost count how many times I’ve heard the same apology.”
“I shouldn’t have thought it was normal. You were only eight years old then—just eight years old and yet…”
She had also been a child who had lost her mother only two years ago at the time.
All four siblings had lost their mother, but in particular, Violet and Cairn had still been too young.
They should have been taken care of, but each member of the family had been drowning in their own sorrows that they couldn’t think about other people’s pain.
No. At the very least, he should not have hurt her.
“Why are you even apologizing to me?”
Suddenly, Violet looked away from the sky and asked this question. Roen could feel that her subdued gaze was directly leveled at him.
“Are you apologizing because you truly feel remorse for me, or are you apologizing only because you loathe to leave a stain on your otherwise faultless excellence, Young Lord?”
“Vee, you…”
“Do not call me by that name.”
“……”
Roen shut himself up right away. Nevertheless, Violet continued speaking, slowly and indifferently.
“I don’t quite understand, Young Lord. Just like Br… Just like Mikhail, wouldn’t it be more convenient for you if you just continue pinning the blame on me?”
“That’s—”
“Is it because you wish to relieve the guilt weighing down on you somewhat? Or is it because you don’t want to leave a blemish on your perfection… Really, how can I know that your alleged feelings of remorse and your apologies are actually sincere?”
“…I’m sorry.”
“I am just… I am just the same as before. The wounds I had received as a child remain the same…”
Roen had kept on repeating the same ‘I’m sorry’ until now like a machine, but hearing these words, he could not even say it again. Violet looked out the window once again.
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Comments
Thank you for translating this series. It’s the novel I needed. Thank you for the chapter!
DCRangeRange
Thanks for the chapter
