crowncosmo
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Sketches coming tomorrow (and also a few thoughts)
🕑 Added 2025-03-09 02:54:05 +0000 UTCHey yall, happy International Women's Day :D sorry again for the unannounced delays, I should have last month's sketches up and ready tomorrow. As folks may have inferred, I have indeed been supremely busy within a colossally packed schedule filled with schoolwork, art work, and work work, late nights and early mornings, concerns surrounding my health not handling the stress very well, and now, concerns surrounding my mom (keeping it private, she really needs my help for the next coming while).
I'm honestly really unsure how to handle myself through the miasma of time being this weird construct for me now where it feels like the only stable landmark in my schedule is DnD, everything else feels constantly shifting to a degree that I'm unsure how to keep up. I went out on an evening walk yesterday, my body was horribly sore to a degree I wasn't expecting, which kind of collided horribly with this morning where I had to get up at 6 AM for an 8 hour working period. I discovered I lost a crapload of weight and went down like 4 pant sizes from last year because I barely have time to eat, and I also basically don't have weekends anymore, so my time is now measured in "hours off" vs. "days off"... ugh.
Don't quote me on this because I haven't made up my mind, but I have been thinking way more and more about how much I really want to quit my day job, because not only has the exhaustion been preventing me from doing any of my artstuff that I want to do (including the long-overdue commissions and ESPECIALLY overdue personal projects), it's also just made me have moments of looking in the mirror and think to myself "Cosmo... you're dying. Something has to change."
I understand this must be super frustrating to hear again and again, and I really am trying my best. I hope to be able to figure something out soon..... I just wish I wasn't so damn tired. Sorry about that, here's to getting my shit together again.
Comments
Robert Louis Stoll
It's really not frustrating at all. I'm there with you, in spirit. A ton of things I'd love to learn and do, but stuck in routines and a job that isn't helping things. The only difference is you've gotten up and done things like D&D, art, etc. I wouldn't quit your day job until you're sure your finances can keep up - after that, have at. What I would suggest is finding a support network and a physical space that gets you moving around. Get connected with family and friends, if you aren't. Things that break you out of the cycles that sap you. Modern living is a slow form of death, indeed. I applaud you for having done what you have to make it less so - and there's no shame in the struggle. May we all find the resolve to move past it.
Tara
I would like to preferece, that the ones who are here now enjoy your work. They will also be the ones here after. Take the time to strengthen yourself and your life. Some projects like art content can wait. Forcing yourself to produce with all the stress will only lead to more stress. Take your time to become, as all transional paths take. Apologies if I'm overeaching, but goals you seek, should not be to your followers, but to you.
