scottcalico
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Azure Spheres Release & Spoilers
🕑 Added 2021-04-06 13:15:03 +0000 UTCSo after several years of running out of time, personal roadblocks, and horrific corruptions that forced me to work on this in tinier bits and pieces across multiple .fla files, my can-barely-be-considered-a-flash-game Azure Spheres was thrown up onto the internet last night, just in time to be slightly too late for Easter :D ..Then it turns out FA doesn't let you post new flashes, and even then it doesn't properly emulate layer effects. It does, however, let you overwrite old flashes with new ones! So the prior release that had all of its content stripped 2 years ago has been rewritten with its current build. Download it, then download Adobe Flash Player to play.
The Game
https://www.furaffinity.net/view/31029494/
Standalone Adobe Flash Player:
https://www.adobe.com/support/flashplayer/debug_downloads.html
However, this is an Easter 2018 release. For those who don't remember, Easter 2018 was April 1st. As such this game is also most indeededly designed to troll the player in a way that I don't think I can/should ever try to do again. SO! :D If you'd like to play it but prevent pulling your hair out, I've posted the below spoilerific guide regarding the mechanics.
[GAME SPOILERS AHEAD]
The non-dating-sim adventure game is about helping Scott find his missing Easter Eggs. While looking for them you'll come across most of my OC's and find that they're either ditching you or blowing you off somehow, with varying responses depending on whether you choose to reply with 'Off Course!' or 'Fuck Off'. The only thing that seems to progress it involves waiting several hours in real time, only to have your appointment at Mr Smith's office cancelled. By now most people would probably have closed the game and thought 'yeah yeah whatever I got suckered.'
What ISN'T revealed until several steps into the game is that the waiting room at the office is where the Easter Eggs are hidden. People who are a lot more familiar with Easter Eggs in flash games might know/recall from MANY other flashes over the past 20something years is that holding the tab button hi-lights anything clickable, and there's a LOT of clickable in that room. This is why it's so strongly recommended to get Flash Player. Expanding the window's width reveals the easter eggs hiding off screen. They manipulate how much time has passed, condition flags in the office minigame (i.e., completing 5 invoices, 1 wrong invoice, increase # of days worked by 1, or trigger a review to occur the next time you go to the office—all of which so that you can watch Mr Smith's various responses with ease), and can flat out give you a shitload of money to buy everything you need. That's why it's an Easter Egg hunt—to prevent you from having to actually play the game organically or chase something that might/might not be there, as the game is been poorly designed with intent.
CHARACTER ARCS
Jenifer: Primary 'arc' of the game that has the intended endings. If you keep going to her apartment before finding her at the club, the game will declare you dumb, which causes the characters to be extra rude and condescending to you for making such bad decisions. After being ditched at the club (for minor HP damage), she retreats to her apartment for the rest of the game and eats the bunny that she took home (instead of you.) Several hours later she'll complain about having trouble digesting her date and ask you to find some medication to help with the situation. They're sold at the marketplace but there are 2 versions. One of them is affordable! One of them is not (thanks, The Healthcare System! :D) You can grind forever with the 2 ways there are to make money or you can just skip all that nonsense and grant yourself $10,000 via the Easter Eggs. Depending on which medicine you buy, you'll get 1 of 2 different endings.
Mr Smith: The primary roadblock in making progress in the former arc. Denise will set you up with an appointment that takes place after nearly 5 hours of gameplay occurs. At this point, she regrets to inform you (or with great snark, if you were rude to her) that your appointment has been cancelled. By now, it's evening hours. If you go to the marketplace, Mr Smith will hit you with his car (massive HP loss) and make you work off the collision damage at his office every day thereafter, unlocking the office minigame. Every day at 9 AM you can begin working a shift that lasts until the end of the day (time accelerates as you work, it's roughly 5 minutes). Denise will give you the rules on how to process the invoices. If you told her to Fuck Off, she will intentionally misinform you on how they are to be processed in an attempt to get you #hashtageatenbywolves2018'd. Each invoice that you complete earns you pennies. and each day that you work randomly pumps up the chance of your work being reviewed by Mr Smith. He wants an average of 19 invoices processed with 95% accuracy per day. This can be rather difficult to do, particularly because there's a small chance that you'll get an illegible invoice with a 50/50 chance of being right/wrong, potentially throwing off your accuracy. If you continuously meet this quota he'll give you raises and if you get a perfect score he'll give you a more significant raise. If you fail to meet the quota, you get a bad review. If you meet your quota after that you're back in good standing. If you fail twice in a row, he'll eat you. Depending on how badly you've performed your job, you MIGHT survive in his stomach long enough to agree to try harder and get spit back out. But that's your one warning. The next time he'll eat you, he's not letting you out and it's game-over. There is no further progression, only an infinite loop of working for not enough money. Just like the real world! ...Only better, since at least you can get eatenbywolves...
Elenor: Sleepybeartime. She's hibernating in this game and won't wake up unless you brought her pizza. This is a game of Russian roulette. She has a 2/3 chance of wanting more pizza and a 1/3 chance of being satisfied. If she's eaten enough she'll scoop you up and sleep with you until work-time in the morning, recovering any lost HP in the process. If she hasn't eaten enough and still wants more food, she'll just eat YOU and it's game over. If the game declared you dumb, you won't think twice about giving her a tummyrub and get smothered to death in the process when she rolls over in bed.. Whoops.
The Park: There's nothing here but neglected OC's who didn't get to be in the game. Poor things :C
Bunnies: Literally cut from the game. I didn't want to delay this release any further just to have yet another way to get murdered implemented :S
Marketplace: Where you get hit by Mr Smith's car. But also, during daytime hours, Scott and Tevy are there to buy Easter candy that's heavily discounted for some reason. They extend an invitation to an inaccessible area and leave the game, that's... that's it. The items for sale at A-Mart include Pizza, Prédisolv and Predisolv. The other items have absolutely no practical use. Purpup, clearly marked as "Live Explosives", will detonate and nuke the city if you try to purchase him.
Lake: Gery's hanging out here during daytime hours! He'll want to play hide and seek. Regardless of what response you choose he'll ultimately take it as a yes, and proceed to hide in the Game Over screen. You can find him and win the game there, even though you're dead. During the dusk or evening hours, the Blood Fairy may show up if you have over 10 HP and politely ask if she can drink some of your blood (5 HP loss). Depending on how much blood you've donated, she'll occasionally reward you with money that increases at a compounding rate.
For people playing a legit run (oh god please don't), you can work during the day, bleed out in the late hours, then sleep until morning to go back to work, making money all the while to reach the end goal of affording Prédisolv, which is still way too unfairly out of reach.
So... yeah, please cheat at/enjoy at this game :v
Comments
Kadarth
I really want to play but cant thanks to adobe nuking their flash player. Any way you could release this outside of flash?
GreatLizardX
I don't wanna tell Tevy or Scott to F**k off! lol =P
Scott Calico
I just couldn't find a place for her and was running out of the 10MB limit for memory o~o;; Maybe a different game.
derppawn
Love the Jennifer arc, very well done!
Thegreatblu
The fact that globbles didn't even get in with the other oc's that weren't used must means that oc is in a different game that was made in an alternate universe from our own.
