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[Cheat] Chapter 81: Timmy
🕑 Added 2025-04-28 03:45:47 +0000 UTC“Didn’t he say it himself? He is Barbatos, the Anemo Archon.”
“Huh? The Anemo Archon? That guy is the Archon? Don’t try to fool me—Paimon is super smart!”
Lumine was also surprised. “That guy… is a god? But he didn’t feel anything like the god we met before.”
“That’s perfectly normal. Just like humans, gods have different personalities too. Besides, Venti was incredibly powerful a few thousand years ago.”
“Really?” Paimon asked, doubtful.
“As we walked all the way here, didn’t you notice something? Whether it was cliffs or mountains, they were all steep and smooth, without many jagged edges. Did you realize that?”
“Huh… Now that you mention it, it is like that. But why?”
“That’s because Barbatos shaped them with divine power thousands of years ago. Since it was shaped by the wind, it created Mondstadt’s uniquely smooth terrain.”
“Wow, that’s amazing!”
“Of course it is. That was the old him. Now? He’s not that different from an ordinary person. There are many reasons for that.”
Lumine became excited. “Then… do you think he might know something about my sister?”
“You can ask him next time you see him. But personally, I don’t think he does.”
Paimon added, “Still, it’s worth asking—just in case.”
“Mhm.”
“By the way, Zephyr—hmph—you finally met someone who turned you down, huh?”
Paimon crossed her arms smugly. “Before, when Chloris wanted to travel with you, you said no. Now you want to travel with Venti, and he said no. Looks like karma really got you.”
Zephyr was speechless. “Can you not misuse idioms like that? And besides, that little loli is just a regular person. My goal is people who have a Vision.”
“Wow, that’s… brutally realistic.”
“It’s a mission, okay? A mission, get it?”
“Then how come you let Paimon, who doesn’t have a Vision, tag along with you all the time? Is it because Paimon is just too adorable?”
Paimon blinked her big sparkly eyes at him.
Zephyr’s eyelid twitched. “Adorable? Really? You think that’s it? It’s because I couldn’t get rid of you in the game, okay? I was literally the first player to figure out how to play without Paimon.”
“Paimon is angry now! Let’s just leave the rest of this area for later!”
With a sudden dash, the Traveler sprinted off.
“Hey! Traveler! Wait for me!”
Along the way, they fought off a few more hilichurl groups, until Mondstadt’s majestic city walls appeared in the distance.
“Mondstadt, I’m back.”
Suddenly, Lumine asked a question.
“Something just occurred to me. Since we already unlocked the Statue of The Seven, why didn’t we just teleport back instead of running all this way?”
…
This question deserved some serious thought, but it was hard to answer—because the moment anyone answered it, it would expose the intelligence level of all three. So, by unspoken agreement, none of them brought it up again.
As they stepped onto the bridge, Zephyr grinned. “Yo, isn’t that Timmy?”
He hadn’t seen Timmy the last time he came to Mondstadt and was honestly kind of disappointed. This time, running into him made him genuinely happy.
Timmy was standing alone on the bridge, seemingly talking to the pigeons. The pigeons weren’t afraid of him at all, pecking at the grain on the ground with soft cooing sounds.
Paimon looked at Zephyr suspiciously. “Traveler, why do you have that evil look on your face? Don’t tell me you’re thinking of wiping out all those pigeons?”
Zephyr replied, “Am I that kind of person? Paimon, how could you think that of me? I’m so disappointed in you!”
Paimon looked ashamed.
Then Zephyr pulled out his sword. “Who said I’m only going to take out this group of pigeons? Tomorrow’s group, the day after tomorrow’s group—I’m taking them all down!”
He stepped forward.
“Sigh… I’m so envious of pigeons. I wish I could fly as freely through the skies as they do.”
Suddenly, a wind vortex surged through, turning all the pigeons on the ground into piles of poultry meat.
Timmy was stunned. What just happened?! He turned his gaze to Zephyr.
“You—why did you do that?! Why would you hurt the pigeons?!”
“I had no choice.”
“What do you mean, no choice?! You deliberately hurt innocent animals!”
Timmy looked like he was about to cry. Why… why would anyone hurt his precious pigeons?
Zephyr said, “I didn’t have a choice. I’m poor. I’m starving. This was a last resort.”
“Starving?! You don’t look like someone who's starving! And even if that’s true, you could’ve asked the Knights of Favonius for help! Why would you hurt the pigeons?! My mom always says, if you truly love the world, even animals won’t be afraid of you! I worked so hard to build trust with them, and you just ruined it!”
Zephyr opened his mouth to reply, but then noticed Paimon staring at him.
“…Why are you looking at me like that?”
“Paimon is just trying to figure out why you’d do something with literally zero moral baseline!”
Zephyr fired back, “Let me ask you—if I made Sweet Madame with this meat, would you eat it or not?”
“…Eat.”
Timmy shouted, “Hey! You still haven’t answered me! Don’t you understand that pigeons are living beings too?! Why would you hurt them?! And using a skill that dangerous on a bridge—aren’t you afraid of hurting passersby?! Just because you have a Vision doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want!”
Zephyr calmly responded, “First of all, as long as you’re alive, you need to eat. Everything you eat or drink was once alive. Maybe you didn’t kill it yourself, but it died because of you. Unless you stop eating entirely, and the only result of that is—you starve to death.
Second, I checked the area before using the skill. There were no people around.
Third, yes—Vision holders are that amazing. I killed those pigeons. So what are you gonna do about it?”
Paimon said, “Wow… this guy’s literally acting like a textbook villain.”
Timmy’s face turned red with fury. “Y-You… WAAAH! You’re a bad person! I’m gonna tell my mom!”
“Oh no, you made a kid cry…”
“Hmph! I’m proud of it.”
“There’s no saving this guy…”
Zephyr swaggered across the bridge. But two guards stationed outside Mondstadt had seen the whole thing.
“Hey, you! Hold it right there!”
Just as they were about to enter the city, they were stopped.
Paimon asked nervously, “Is something wrong?”
Were they about to be held accountable for their “crime”? Oh no… Were they going to get arrested? Paimon was starting to panic.
One of the guards, Swan, said, “Traveler, you misunderstand. I just wanted to remind you—the pigeons respawn every morning at 6 a.m.”
“…What?”
“You might not know this if you’re new to Mondstadt, but there’s a huge flock of pigeons that come to the bridge every morning to eat what tourists leave behind. So, you don’t need to worry. The pigeons will be back tomorrow.”
Paimon was shocked. “…You’re not here to arrest or scold us?”
Swan replied, “As a Knight of Favonius, I should reprimand you. What you did could have harmed the pigeons, and there’s always a risk of injuring a bystander.
But personally? I fully support you.”
//END
