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[Cheat] Chapter 69: I Was Just Joking!
🕑 Added 2025-04-15 19:11:41 +0000 UTCOnly now did Paimon realize what had happened.
“Wait, Gojo-sensei actually dined and dashed?! Ugh, Traveler, you really are such a good person!”
Zephyr replied,
“Yeah yeah, I know I’m a good person. Where are Panda and the others?”
“They had something to do and went out. They’ll be back soon.”
Nobara let out a sigh.
“Big Sis, you have no idea how badly he tormented us today. We’ve been running around all day—we’re only now getting a break.”
Speaking of which, even Megumi Fushiguro looked full of grievances.
“Every day it’s just battle after battle. They say it’s training, but I think Maki-senpai is just getting revenge for what I said before… never mind, forget I said anything.”
“Ohh? Now I’m curious!”
Nobara grinned mischievously.
“Hehe, Big Sis, let me tell you! Megumi, he—”
Ahem ahem!”
“He—”
AHEM AHEM!!”
Paimon piped up,
“Geez, such a stingy guy. Just share your little secrets!”
“No way!”
“So stingy! If something’s bothering you, share it so we can all enjoy it together!”
“You want a beating, don’t you?”
Quick on his feet, Megumi changed the subject.
“Lumine, I have a question for you.”
“Go ahead.”
“Do you know how to carry a weapon in a way that doesn’t interfere with mobility or movement at all? I’ve been racking my brain the whole day and haven’t figured it out. My gut tells me you probably know.”
“I’m not telling you.”
“Yeah, I figured you didn’t kn—wait, what?! So you do know how?!”
“Of course I do. I’m just not telling you.”
Megumi gave her a pleading look.
“Come on, please tell me…”
Zephyr chimed in,
“500 Mora.”
“I’m broke!!”
“Then forget it. But seriously, this method works wonders, especially for someone like you. It could boost your combat power by at least fifty percent.”
“Fifty percent?! Zephyr-sama, please—I’m begging you!”
Nobara muttered,
“Megumi, where’s your dignity?!”
Zephyr grinned.
“Alright, alright, I’ll give you one hint. Whether you figure it out or not is up to you… Shadow.”
“Shadow…”
Megumi fell into deep thought.
---
Late at night, Itadori Yuji and Yoshino Junpei finally returned.
“Itadori, you’re back. Why do you look so exhausted? And is that the new student next to you?”
Itadori’s entire body practically screamed tired, and he groaned,
“Haah... You wanna know why I look like this? Then ask that damned teacher of ours. He said he’d treat us to a meal, but halfway through he just ran off! Left us scrubbing dishes for hours...”
Paimon gasped,
“Waaah, that’s so pitiful!”
Itadori’s eyes turned sharp and deadly.
You have the nerve to talk?! You were the one who ate the most! We would’ve been done in half the time if you didn’t make us wash so many extra dishes!”
“Ehehe... ahem.”
“Don’t think you can get away with this by acting cute!”
Just then, Gojo Satoru walked in.
“What’s all the ruckus about? Oh hey, if it isn’t Yuji and Junpei—welcome back!”
Itadori suddenly found some mysterious burst of energy, stormed up to Gojo, and grabbed him by the collar.
Welcome back my ass! That was seriously messed up, you know!”
Gojo tilted his head innocently.
“What are you guys even talking about?”
“Don’t play dumb! You said you were treating us, then halfway through you ditched us! We ended up washing dishes all day because of you!”
Gojo gave him a puzzled look.
“Ditched you? Didn’t I say I remembered something urgent and had to head back first?”
“No, you didn’t! You never said that! And even if you did have something to do, you could’ve at least paid the bill first!”
“Pay? I already did pay.”
“...Huh?!”
“That waitress didn’t tell you?”
Everyone froze. He paid already? What’s going on?
“Don’t lie to me!”
“Do I look like someone who lies?”
“Uh...”
Even though Gojo was always kinda sketchy, now that they thought about it… he really never lied.
“Why don’t you just call the restaurant and ask, then?”
“Fine! But if I find out you were lying, I swear I’ll kill you!”
“Scary, scary~”
Itadori pulled out his phone and dialed the restaurant number he had saved.
“Hello, this is Itadori Yuji, the one who helped out at your place earlier... So, after getting back to school, my teacher said he had already paid the bill... Huh? He did pay it?! You guys made a mistake?!”
Off to the side, Junpei looked crushed.
“Then what the hell did we scrub dishes for...?”
“What?! Compensation?! I don’t want compensation! I’m pissed! Wait, what? The cashier who handled the payment had to leave for an emergency and didn’t inform the server who took over? I don’t care, that’s not my problem!”
Click!
He hung up the phone with a dramatic slap.
Gojo Satoru slung an arm around Itadori Yuji’s shoulders and said with a grin,
“See, Yuji? I told you I paid the bill. How could you not trust your teacher?”
“...”
Itadori turned his head away, looking a little helpless, a little embarrassed.
“Sorry.”
“And you too, Junpei-kun,” Gojo said with exaggerated disapproval, “Behaving like that could really leave a bad impression on your new teacher, you know~”
“I’m really sorry, Gojo-sensei, it was our mistake. Truly, we’re sorry!”
Paimon added, “Paimon really thought Gojo-sensei ditched us... turns out we just misunderstood.”
Zephyr (Lumine) spoke up, “You think it’s really that simple?”
“Huh?”
Fushiguro Megumi rubbed his nose thoughtfully.
“I think I’ve more or less figured out what actually happened. But Yuji, don’t be so quick to apologize. Didn’t you notice something off?”
“Something off?”
“Don’t you think everything was just a bit too convenient?”
A drop of cold sweat trickled down Gojo’s forehead.
“Gojo just happened to pay the bill, then that cashier just happened to leave suddenly. And that same cashier just happened to not inform the server who took over.
Don’t you think all of that is way too coincidental? So coincidental it feels... intentional.”
“Eh?!”
Gojo quickly cut in, “Megumi, what are you even saying? Coincidences like that happen all the time, don’t they? Like, running into a friend by chance on the street, going to the convenience store and finding the item you want is sold out, or—like the supermarket saying eggs are half-price at 5PM, and then boom, a bunch of old ladies snatch them all up the moment the clock ticks past five. Totally normal, right?”
Paimon snarked, “That last one has absolutely nothing to do with the others...”
Junpei said, “Wait, now that you mention it, I do remember seeing Gojo-sensei talking with that cashier before she left in a hurry.”
Itadori’s gaze turned sharp.
“Go...jo...sen...sei?”
“W-wait! This is all a misunderstanding! I just thought the cashier girl was cute and asked for her contact info, that’s all!
Who knew she’d suddenly remember it was her little brother’s birthday, and that they had plans to go to the amusement park together?
She realized it late, got all flustered, and asked for emergency leave!”
“LIES! ALL EXCUSES! How do you know that much detail unless you were plotting something?! Damn it, it’s all your fault we ended up working all day for nothing!”
Veins popped on Itadori’s forehead as he growled,
“Gojo-sensei, do you know what I’m thinking right now?”
“W-what… what are you thinking?”
“What I’m thinking right now… is that I want to murder you.”
//END
