RedX43
patreon
[Cheat] Chapter 78: The Stuttering Jerk
🕑 Added 2025-04-24 03:41:27 +0000 UTCThe Whopperflower curled itself into a tight ball, and a defense gauge appeared above its head.
In the game, players have to break that gauge within a time limit—otherwise, the Whopperflower would unleash a chain of flame attacks, dealing massive damage and leaving the player temporarily stunned.
The range and speed of that fire burst, combined with its teleportation ability, made it deadly for new players—many got wrecked by it.
Of course, breaking the defense gauge wasn't hard if you had a Hydro character—just a few hits could shatter it. But if you didn’t have Hydro or another counter element… your only option was to run.
Clearly, the Hilichurl Berserker didn’t have any Hydro abilities. And given its IQ, it didn’t even try to attack the Whopperflower while it was charging up. Instead, it went straight back to brawling with Zephyr.
It raised its axe—it looked like it was about to use a spinning heavy strike.
But Zephyr wasn’t afraid. He moved in and landed a few normal attacks, interrupting the Berserker before it could even get started.
Right then, the Whopperflower finished charging.
BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.
A volley of fireballs exploded against the Berserker’s shield.
One or two hits were fine—but the sustained barrage quickly reduced the shield to ash. The next wave of fireballs slammed directly into the Berserker’s chest.
The Hilichurl howled in rage.
Zephyr seized the opportunity and went in for the kill. No fancy moves—just a straight-up ultimate skill to finish it off.
The Berserker let out one last unwilling roar before collapsing on the spot.
The loot? Kinda disappointing. Just a few dozen Mora and some white-tier materials.
Chloris came over, patted the Whopperflower’s head, and smiled. “Nice job, Wooper!”
Zephyr asked, “So this is…?”
“This is my pet. I call her Wooper.”
“You turned a Whopperflower into a pet? How did you even do that?”
Zephyr was genuinely curious—after all, taming monsters wasn’t even a mechanic in the original game.
Chloris said proudly, “It’s simple. As everyone knows, I’m a botanical expert.”
Paimon snorted. “Says who? That’s just self-promotion.”
“So of course, being able to tame a Whopperflower totally makes sense, right?”
Paimon snapped, “No, it doesn’t! What does being a plant expert have to do with taming monsters?”
“Ugh, how can you not get it? Let me ask you this: What is a Whopperflower? It’s a flower! And what are flowers? Plants! So obviously, I can tame it. Duh!”
Everyone—Zephyr included—was left speechless.
Was that… even a valid argument?
Paimon shouted, “Wait, wait, wait—who told you Whopperflowers were plants? They’re monsters! Magical creatures!”
“Huh? Nuh-uh. Whopperflowers are clearly plants. If they’re not, why are they called ‘Whopperflowers’?”
“Because they have flowers on their heads that look like Sweet Flowers! That’s why they’re called Whopperflowers! But biologically, they’re still magical beasts!”
Chloris pouted. “Tch, you’re just jealous and trying to slander my Wooper.”
“Paimon is not jealous!”
The little loli patted the Whopperflower’s head and said sweetly, “Alright, Wooper, you can go back now. But when I call you, come right away, okay?”
The Whopperflower nodded humanlike, then burrowed into the ground and disappeared to who-knows-where.
Zephyr was at a loss for words.
Was he playing Genshin Impact… or Pokémon?
Paimon was also dumbfounded. “Oh, right! What about that knight from earlier? He totally ignored us while we were fighting monsters! That’s not okay—Paimon is going to go ask him why!”
She flew off, chasing after the Mondstadt knight.
“Hey! Mondstadt knight! Paimon is talking to you! You are a knight, right? Why didn’t you help us when you saw us getting attacked by monsters? You just walked off like nothing happened!”
That person said calmly, “Yes, I’m a knight. But what does that have to do with helping you?”
“You—aren’t you a knight? Shouldn’t knights help people in danger?”
“You’re thinking of the city guards. I’m just a regular knight. My duty is to patrol, observe, and record what happens during the day. Helping you isn’t part of my job description.”
“You—! You!”
> Mondstadt Knight LV20 <
Zephyr raised an eyebrow. “You’re the strongest Mondstadt knight I’ve seen so far. Your level’s even higher than Amber’s when I first met her. Why is that?”
“It’s simply because helping you isn’t in my job scope,” the man replied with a calm expression.
“You’re the fifth traveler I’ve seen this month—but the only one who’s survived. If you want to get to Mondstadt, just head west. It’s about a day’s journey.”
> Quest Triggered: Jess's Burden
> Jess was once a high-ranking knight in Mondstadt. But for certain reasons, he was reassigned to wilderness patrol.
> No matter what he sees along the road, he never stops—not even when travelers are attacked, violating the ethics and principles of knighthood.
> Investigate what really happened to Jess.
> Accept Quest? YES / NO
“Yes,” Zephyr confirmed the quest.
“Can we talk? What happened in your past?”
Jess glanced at Zephyr but didn’t respond. He simply walked away.
His voice drifted back on the wind.
“Mondstadt is known far and wide as the City of Freedom. But even under freedom, there are unseen rules. Stranger, let me warn you—never defy the unspoken rules of Mondstadt’s freedom.”
“……”
As the figure faded into the distance, Paimon muttered, “That guy is seriously weird.”
Zephyr was thoughtful. What did he mean by that?
He said, “We should ask around at the Knights of Favonius sometime and see what’s going on with him… Where’s Chloris?”
“She’s over there.”
The little loli plant expert was crouching beside a bush, staring gloomily at a blue fruit on the ground.
“How could it be like this…”
“What’s wrong?” Zephyr asked.
She sighed. “I originally thought that purple-blue Sweet Flower was a new species or maybe a mutated variant. But it turns out—ugh—it’s just a Hook Fruit core the Hilichurls ate and tossed onto the Sweet Flower.”
She looked incredibly disappointed and huffed, “Those awful, stinky Hilichurls! Can’t they throw their trash in a trash can after eating fruit? Why do they have to litter?! And of all places, why throw it right onto a Sweet Flower? Do they have any idea how much confusion this caused me?!”
Paimon sweat-dropped. “Uh… Even if you say that… there aren’t any trash cans in the wild…”
“I don’t care, I don’t care! Stupid Hilichurls! Dirty Hilichurls! Dumb Hilichurls!”
Zephyr shrugged. So now the Hilichurls are the scapegoat? Poor guys…
Her little tantrum didn’t change the situation, though. Night had fallen—it was clear they wouldn’t be making it back to Mondstadt tonight.
Zephyr pulled something out of her inventory—and both Paimon and Chloris were stunned.
“A bed? Wait, your backpack can fit something that big?”
“Traveler! When did you move a whole school bed into your bag? How did Paimon not notice?!”
Zephyr replied coolly, “While you were e-e-e-e-eating~”
Paimon pouted. “Paimon is giving you a new nickname! From now on, you’re the Stuttering Jerk!!!”
//END
