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Have Totem, Will Travel - Ch. 2 (alphas)

🕑 Added 2025-06-19 01:45:44 +0000 UTC

Comments

Gary Coleman

"I see Shar jam the shoulder stock of the shotgun into her guy’s face, and I’m pretty I hear the guy’s nose break." I think there's a 'sure' that should go in between 'pretty' & 'I.' Either way, excellent chapter!

Gary Coleman

Actually, Cheyenne is in Wyoming.

Darkserra

Great start! Can't wait to see where it goes. In one line you reference "Montana" where I think it should be "Colorado" - location of the Amber mine. Hang in there, this too shall pass.

Gregg Hagerty

"No matter where you do, no matter what you do," I think the first "you do" should be "you go"

Gregg Hagerty

"Around Fairfield, though, she started laughed," I think "laughing" would work better or remove "started".


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