CalCroissant
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Scorching book 1 - Early-ish
🕑 Added 2025-06-05 10:38:39 +0000 UTCHey folks!
As of 10 minutes ago, I finished dev-editing book 1. I'm sure there's plenty of typos in there, but those are my publisher's problem >:)
I'm about to start uploading them on RR, but here's the file (pdf, i was gonna do epub, but export is being weird and pages are missing) if you like reading on e-readers and whatnot. Don't mind the typos/grammar, those will be picked up, but if you noticed inconsistencies or continuity issues, do let me know. There'll be plenty of rounds of edits with my publisher, and I'll make sure to fix them when we start the process.
Thanks a bunch for your patience. I hope you'll find the edited version a little better. If you'd rather not re-read everything, here's a quick resume (though it most certainly won't cover every little aspect)
Changelog(ish):
Ethan is generally more likable and a bit less of an edge-lord (especially early). He still dealt with many people in mostly the same manner as before, and he's consistent with how he had been portrayed over the last 20-ish chapters. The largest change I can think of is that he gave that dick-ish guy in chapter 1 a box-cutter to free himself before he left him to free himself. He still considered letting him stay stuck in the car, but disrespect isn't worth letting someone die.
Arcanum (previously wands) are better structured and have less fluff (removed the mana regen numbers, cooldown). The upgrades to their elements are easier to track and follow. Generally, everything about the Arcanums is a little clearer and less obfuscated.
Ember origin is clearer from the get-go. She's from an outside world and that's why she knows what she does. Most of you have probably read the prologue for book 2, so this isn't spoiler: Ember's aware of magic, arcanums and spells, but the interface and system stuff is as new to her as it is new to Ethan.
Fragments are always visible as gold smoke-like thing that emanates either from the body of the dead user or from their summoned Arcanum (if it's still around)
Rifts in general will sortof replaces side-quest, and Ethan gains an extra trait when he finishes this rift (and the rift reward is listed at the same time as the rift challenge). It's also spelled out that there will not be any new side quest for a while. Once he finishes the one he still has, that'll be it.
Ethan spends most of his fragments at the end to bring his third Arcanum to tier-3 and it now also has 3 spellform slots available.
Amanda's motivation is a little clearer. Added a scene where she deals a little with the fallout of getting captured by Edwin's people, and where she wants to go from there. It fits better with how she is behaving in book 2
...
I'm sure there's more I missed. In any case, I feel more confident with this version going to market. Let me know if you like this better!
PS: The updates are live on RR. So you can read either this pdf, or over on RR. The old chapters of Patreon have not been updated.
Comments
calcroissant
Legit forgot about the humming line of savannah :// already sent the copy but i’ll def add it once the manuscript comes back with the suggestion. It’s a great scene, just slipped through the cracks
guillaume nguyen
Chapter 74 : "Blood fountained out of the severed arteries, and Edwin fell to his knees, eyes wide as he tried to hold his bleeding neck, and it would be the last image Ethan would have of the man before he drowned him in fire until the notification arrived, and until the ground was glowing." > sentence too long. Chapter 78 : "Before it managed to move a single foot, Ethan made contact on the moss-covered back of the creature." > remove one space between foot and Ethan. Chapter 81 : "He could do this, and after that, they’d all go back home and figure out what was going on there and in case things went south against the last lord, he had the wings." > on there, and in Chapter 82 : "He flared his wings and crouched as he began urgently charging another [Overloading Fireball] between two palms and curiously, he could empower it faster." > remove one space between Fireball and between. Chapter 40 : "One moment the man was standing casually, and the next his began growing taller." > next he began Chapter 43 : " “[Good. Because I like them. Not let me sle—meditate.]” Ethan chuckled. “Right. I’m gonna go meditate as well, then. Last thing. How do youactually use a primagem?” " > 'Now let me' and add a space between you and actually Chapter 50 : " Dropping her shield to the ground, Amber proceeded to sit down and wince." > Audrey Chapter 51 : "The person wore a white mask with a boldly painted snarl that leering at her." > snarl, and was leering Chapter 60 : "We wouldn’t need to scavenge and scurry around for easy pray if we had someone powerful to shield us." > prey Chapter 65 : "The man that had been shooting at him was as pale as a ghost, while all trace of mirth had been wiped away from Edwin’s face and a second later, she the shadow woman appeared at his side, still panting, hair smoking." > 'had long been wiped' and remove the she between later and the. ////////////////////// Funny thing, I'm helping another author with his edits and he has the reverse of your habit. While you make sentences that are too long, he forgo the use of commas and end his sentences at the middle XDXDXD Shame, you didn't add my suggestion of Savannah humming a child song for the last time. Oh well. Good job on building up on Edwin's flashback, flow more smoothly into the story. Amanda clean up scene underline that while she does have ambition, she is different from Edwin, Lance and co. None of them would have remembered the names of their followers, or bothered to think of burrying them. That sentence "She didn’t manage to strike out on her own, so she would make herself indispensable to those who could." especially follow our arguments about you not making Amanda kinder.
calcroissant
Nope! Arcanum tier only affects the upgrades available. But there are upgrades that affect the stats, which in turn affects the spells. This way, the two types (Prime/lesser) affect the stats in the exact same manner, aka through the spellform bonus. The exception to what affects stats (and by that extension, spells) is the set bonuses, and the traits/arcanum titles (which are carried by the prime arcanum) Edit: arcanum tier also affects what can be equipped in the Arcanum of course.
the ice man
do Arcanum tier strength or effect spells?
