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MD - Chapter 78: What happened last night?
🕑 Added 2025-03-17 17:41:53 +0000 UTCThe sun illuminated the face of the person sleeping deeply beside him.
"Howard?" Andrew asked incredulously upon realizing he was with his friend.
Taking a closer look at the room, he noticed that it was Howard's bedroom. There were a lot of Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and comic-related items scattered around.
"Turn off the light, Mom…" Howard mumbled in a hoarse voice, frowning as the sunlight hit his face directly.
"I'm not your mom, and I can't turn off the damn sun. Wake up," Andrew said impatiently, shaking Howard's shoulder roughly.
He didn't have many memories of last night, and that was not a good sign. He was supposed to have gone home, but here he was at Howard’s place, with fragmented and confusing memories of the night before.
Howard slowly opened his eyes, and when he saw Andrew there, his expression shifted from confusion to instant panic. He quickly pulled away, eyes wide open.
"What the hell are you doing in my room?! How did you get here?!"
Andrew, still trying to piece together what had happened, sighed and rubbed his head, feeling a slight discomfort. "I don't know, Howard… I just woke up here too. I don’t remember anything from last night, but it looks like… I don’t know… we ended up here."
"Oh, man… You don’t think something happened, do you?" Howard asked with a strange look, struggling to put his thoughts into words.
"Of course not!" Andrew immediately interrupted. "Look, we're both dressed, and there’s Leonard."
Andrew pointed toward the corner of the room, where Leonard lay in the laundry basket, asleep in a strange and uncomfortable position. His face was pressed against a pile of T-shirts, and his arms hung limply over the sides of the basket.
"What the hell? Is he alive?" Howard asked, quickly getting out of bed and walking toward the laundry basket.
Andrew sighed, feeling even more frustrated. He stepped forward and, with ease, grabbed Leonard by the back of his shirt, pulling him out of the basket and carefully placing him on the bed.
"He's alive," Andrew confirmed, seeing Leonard's chest rise and fall as he breathed.
Howard, however, was more focused on the laundry basket, which was now not only full of dirty clothes but also stained with what appeared to be vomit.
"Damn it, Leonard… You're washing my clothes, or my mom is going to kill me," Howard muttered.
Andrew lightly tapped Leonard’s shoulder, trying to wake him up. "Leonard… Leonard, wake up," he said firmly.
Finally, Leonard’s eyes slowly opened, and he immediately groaned. "Ugh… my head…" His voice was hoarse and miserable, like someone suffering from a brutal hangover. "Where are my glasses?"
Without thinking too much, Andrew glanced at the laundry basket and spotted Leonard’s glasses, covered in some thick liquid. He grimaced as he picked them up and handed them to Leonard, who took them with difficulty, wiped them with his sleeve, and put them on, blinking several times as he adjusted to the light.
Leonard remained silent, looking at his two friends staring at him, until he finally asked, "What happened last night?"
"Good question," Andrew replied, rubbing his temple as he tried to organize his thoughts. "Try to remember."
The room fell into silence, with the three of them staring at each other as their brains struggled to piece together the events of the previous night. After a few tense moments, Leonard finally spoke.
"We got drunk because of the ping-pong game, didn’t we?" Leonard asked, uncertainty in his voice.
Andrew nodded, vaguely recalling the events that led them to this point. "Yeah, some guys challenged us to one of those games with cups and a ping-pong ball."
Since Andrew was highly competitive, he accepted the challenge, and Leonard wanted to join in to prove he could have fun at a party or something like that.
Andrew had great aim—he never missed—but that wasn’t the case for Leonard. And since they were a team, they both had to drink, which led to them getting drunk at some point.
"I got drunk on my own, it had nothing to do with ping-pong," Howard said, resting a hand on his chin.
"Why?" Leonard and Andrew asked.
"It's not like you need alcohol to talk to girls," Andrew said, knowing Howard wasn’t shy like Leonard. He always took the initiative—whether he failed was another matter.
"The problem is that they always reject me… so I wanted to see if my drunk self would change the outcome," Howard admitted.
"And… was it successful?" Leonard asked, curious but not very hopeful.
"I don't know… I don’t remember much after getting drunk," Howard replied, scratching his head with an awkward smile.
"Same," Leonard and Andrew said in unison.
Howard shrugged. "Well… I don’t think we did anything crazy while drunk, right? We probably just ended up here to sleep, nothing bad."
"That’s true, but I don’t like having gaps in my memory. That’s never happened to me before," Leonard said, slightly frowning.
"Well, there’s not much we can do about it now," Andrew sighed, and at that moment, he noticed a glint on the floor near the bed.
"Look," Andrew said, pointing at a camera that seemed familiar. "A Sony camera. Isn’t it yours, Howard?"
"Yeah, it's mine. I don’t remember leaving it there…" Howard’s expression slowly changed as something started coming back to him. "Oh… wait, I think at some point during the party, Andrew started recording. Do you guys remember? I brought the camera to film a bit."
"That's it! If there's anything we can find out about last night, it must be in that video," Andrew said, looking at Howard with renewed interest. "Let's put it on the computer and see what we did."
Howard quickly nodded, getting up to grab his laptop. "I'll connect it."
Within minutes, the three of them were seated, ready to watch the video. Howard pressed play, and the screen started showing blurry images due to the low lighting at the party. In the foreground, Andrew appeared in front of the camera.
"Hello, world! I'm Andrew Pritchett… something, and today… today we're here, at this party… with my brother from another mother, Leonard, and the great Howard, master of sex and women," Andrew said, his voice clearly drunk, pausing for a few seconds as if recalculating his thoughts.
"As I was saying, the CIF… This is a message for those bastards. They better promote us, or I’ll go to their offices…" Andrew continued.
"Andrew, stop talking about that! We're not here to send another message to the CIF… Film Howard!" said another voice—Leonard’s—sounding much more energetic and extroverted than usual.
"Oh, right, sorry," Andrew said. Then, he pointed the camera at Howard, who was a few meters away, completely oblivious to what was happening, as he was making out with a larger-built girl.
Both Andrew and Leonard burst into laughter in unison as the video zoomed in on Howard and his kiss with the big-built girl.
"Who would've thought that was Howard's type? He looks like a satellite orbiting a giant planet!" Leonard said, laughing.
Andrew couldn’t hold back his laughter, and the camera shook as he filmed Howard, who had no idea he was being recorded.
"He'll have to start working out and gaining strength… so he can escape her gravitational field," Andrew commented, making Leonard laugh even harder.
"Well, in the end, the alcohol worked. I managed to kiss someone," Howard said with satisfaction while watching the video. Then, he looked at his two friends with a raised eyebrow. "And you two are fatphobic."
Andrew and Leonard looked at each other, their expressions turning somber. They didn’t recognize themselves in the video.
"It must be the alcohol," Leonard said.
"Alcohol doesn’t change personalities. It just lowers inhibitions," Howard replied, shaking his head.
Before Andrew or Leonard could respond, the video continued. On the screen, the kissing scene was coming to an end. The girl and Howard pulled apart and started talking, though they couldn't hear what they were saying due to the distance between them.
Suddenly, the girl slapped Howard hard, leaving his cheek red. Andrew and Leonard burst into laughter in the video, while Howard approached them with a grin on his face.
"What happened? Why did she hit you?" Leonard’s voice was heard in the video.
"I told her I couldn't tell which part was her butt because she had too much fat around her waist..." Howard replied.
"Oh, shit..." Present-day Howard muttered.
"So alcohol doesn’t change personalities, huh?" Leonard said sarcastically.
Howard shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Well... maybe it just brings out parts of us that we’d normally have the decency to keep to ourselves."
Back in the video, Howard looked happy and triumphant. "First girl conquered, baby! Let's go for the second one. Who should it be?" he said, scanning the room for his next target.
"Why don't you kiss Karen?" Andrew suggested.
Karen Smith was one of the most popular girls at Palisades—a cheerleader, Regina’s best friend, and absolutely gorgeous.
Drunk and filled with ridiculous confidence, Howard lifted his head with determination. "Challenge accepted!" he declared as he began searching for the girl.
Leonard and Andrew followed him at a safe distance.
They found Karen leaning against the hallway wall alone, casually checking her phone. She seemed to be waiting to go into the bathroom.
Karen had long blonde hair that cascaded elegantly over her shoulders and fair skin. In any other state, Howard would never have dared to approach her.
"Will he pull it off?" Leonard asked, watching Howard’s confidence as he approached the girl.
"Let’s hope so," Andrew replied, genuinely hoping his friend could score with a beautiful girl.
Howard spoke to Karen, who lifted her gaze from her phone. After a few seconds, they could see Karen laughing, and before long, they started making out passionately.
"What the hell?" Leonard whispered.
"Howard has my respect right now," Andrew said in a low voice while zooming in on the scene.
Back in the present, Howard jumped up in excitement.
"Yes! I kissed Karen Smith!" he exclaimed, completely euphoric.
"Well, Howard, it looks like your drunk self actually has success with girls," Leonard commented, still trying to process what they had just seen.
In the video, the bathroom door swung open, and a guy stumbled out, his eyes glassy and his shirt half unbuttoned. At that exact moment, Karen abruptly pulled away from Howard and rushed into the bathroom.
Howard stood there for a few seconds, staring at the slightly open door, then shrugged with a satisfied smile before heading back to his friends.
"What happened? Why did she leave so fast?" Andrew asked.
"She was throwing up," Howard answered with a triumphant expression. "I got my tongue in there, and I could taste a lot of alcohol. She must've drunk more than I did." He ran his tongue over his lips as if reliving the moment.
"But who cares? I KISSED KAREN SMITH!" he added with a smile.
"Well… that explains a lot," Leonard said, crossing his arms as he watched the video.
The video continued, though with noticeable cuts. Andrew, without realizing it, kept pausing and resuming the recording as they moved around the house, documenting their progress at the party.
As time passed, it became clear that Leonard and Howard, in particular, were getting more and more drunk. Andrew, however, had Pippa looking out for him, taking his drinks away so he wouldn’t end up more wasted than he already was.
In several parts of the video, Leonard could be seen constantly complaining about his girlfriend, Lauren. Apparently, he kept saying she was unbearable, controlling, and wouldn’t let him enjoy the party in peace.
"Wow, what a great boyfriend you are, talking shit about your girlfriend behind her back," present-day Howard mocked, looking at Leonard.
"I wasn’t at my best, okay?" Leonard defended himself.
The video cut out again, and when the image returned, all three of them were in shock. Leonard was clearly seen making out with Haley.
Andrew’s eyes widened as he whipped his head around to glare at Leonard. "YOU KISSED MY COUSIN?!"
Howard let out a whistle and shook his head in disbelief. "Wow, I did not see that coming. At another time, maybe I'd be jealous, but since I kissed Karen, I don’t feel a single bit of envy."
Then he turned to Leonard with a smug grin. "So, besides being fatphobic and talking shit about your girlfriend behind her back, now you’re also a cheater who kisses your friends’ cousins," he added.
"Uh… No, it's the alcohol's fault!" Leonard blurted out, struggling to defend himself.
"You're not any better," Andrew said, glaring at him and about to get up from his chair.
"Wait, wait! You dared me to do it! Remember?" Leonard said quickly, raising his hands in defense.
Andrew paused, piecing together fragments of the night with the help of the video. Since he had been the least drunk of the three, thanks to Pippa, his memory was clearer.
And, in fact, Leonard was right. He had dared him to kiss Haley, just like he had dared Howard to kiss Karen.
"Besides making fatphobic comments, I also dared you to kiss my cousin…" Andrew muttered to himself, running a hand over his face.
"I hope that was all… But how did we even get here? I don’t remember any adult bringing us…" Howard said, frowning.
Even though he had kissed two girls—one of them being Karen Smith—watching himself act so uninhibited, dancing ridiculously, mocking others, and making fatphobic remarks, he knew it wasn’t good. He couldn’t let things keep escalating, or it would turn ugly for them.
Andrew also looked tense, as the video seemed to be heading toward even worse situations.
But the worst of them… was Leonard. Besides the offensive comments, he had kissed his friend’s cousin—though he had been dared to do so—and he had also cheated on his girlfriend.
"Well… let’s keep watching. We need to know how the night ended," Howard said, swallowing hard as he resumed the video.
The footage continued, and after the scene of Leonard kissing Haley, the camera suddenly shifted to focus on Andrew, who was now being scolded by Pippa.
"Andrew, that’s enough! You’re being stupid. Follow me," she said with a frown, grabbing him by the arm.
"Okaaay, beautiful… I’ll go wherever you want," the drunken Andrew in the video said with a goofy smile.
Howard and Leonard turned to look at present-day Andrew, who crossed his arms and nodded. "She did the right thing. She saved me from doing even more stupid things."
On the screen, Pippa led Andrew into an empty room in the house. Still holding the camera, he set it down on a piece of furniture, leaving the angle fixed on the bed, where Pippa sat while Andrew lay down, resting his head on her lap with a satisfied expression.
"Your fingers are so soft…" Andrew murmured, closing his eyes as Pippa ran her fingers through his hair.
"Yeah?" she responded with a small smile.
"Yeah… You’re so pretty…"
Pippa let out a sigh, though in the video, she looked more amused than annoyed. "Thanks."
"Do you wanna be my girlfriend?" Andrew asked, his voice slurred.
Pippa let out a soft laugh, "Andrew… I already am your girlfriend."
"Really?!" Andrew exclaimed, his eyes widening as if he were hearing it for the first time.
In the present, Leonard and Howard burst out laughing.
"Man, you’re so lucky!" Howard said, shaking his head, feeling jealous that he didn’t have such a caring and sweet girlfriend.
‘Why isn’t Lauren like that?’ Leonard thought, unable to stop himself from feeling a little envious of Andrew and Pippa’s relationship.
In the video, Pippa continued running her fingers through Andrew’s hair, but her expression turned more serious.
"I don’t like this drunk Andrew," she said softly.
Andrew blinked and frowned at her. "Why? What did I do?"
"You spent the whole night daring your friends to kiss girls like it was a game. Rude comments… And I’ve had to take care of you this whole time," Pippa sighed.
The Andrew in the video lowered his gaze, looking genuinely remorseful. "I’m sorry… I won’t drink again," he murmured.
Pippa gave him a small smile and kissed his forehead. "You better not."
At that moment, the bedroom door, which had been left slightly open, suddenly swung wide.
"Andrew! Come with me! We have to destroy the One Ring!" Howard exclaimed with exaggerated enthusiasm.
Video-Andrew lifted his head, confused. "What ring?"
"The One Ring, bro. We have to go to the backyard, it’s our mission," Howard insisted, his face full of serious determination.
"Look here," he said, opening his palm. The ring wasn’t visible in the video, but Andrew could see it.
In the present, Leonard ran a hand over his face. "God… what the hell were you doing, Howard?"
"I don’t know, but it sounds epic," Howard said with a strange expression.
Back in the video, Pippa crossed her arms and looked at Howard. "Andrew’s not going anywhere. He’s done enough stupid things for today."
"But Pippa… the mission… the Ring…" Andrew said, shifting restlessly.
Pippa sighed in frustration at Andrew’s pleading look, which made him seem like a child asking for permission.
"Fine… but just one lap around the backyard, and that’s it," she finally said, pointing at them. "And I’m coming with you."
"Yes! Howard Baggins never abandons his mission!" Howard exclaimed, raising a fist in excitement.
"Thanks, Pip. You’re the best," Andrew said with a smile.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say," Pippa replied, rolling her eyes. "But first, I need to go to the bathroom. Wait for me here," she said as she stood up and left the room.
Andrew got up and grabbed the camera again, making sure everything was ready for their adventure.
"Forget about Pippa. We need to leave now," Howard whispered.
"Mm, I don’t think so," Andrew said, not convinced.
"Come on. Frodo and Sam went to Mount Doom alone, there wasn’t a third person. Unless you want your girlfriend to be Gollum…" Howard said.
"Mm, you’re right. It’s just the two of them, and she’s way too pretty to be Gollum," Andrew said, nodding.
"Exactly. It’s our destiny, Andrew Gamgee," Howard insisted with an excited smile.
With that, they quickly left the room, putting as much distance between them and Pippa as possible before she could stop them. However, instead of heading to the backyard as promised, they took another route—the exit of the house.
On the way, Leonard and Steve joined them without asking too many questions, apparently just as drunk and excited about the "mission."
"Did we leave the house?" Leonard asked, feeling a chill run down his spine.
"Steve? He came with us? Where the hell is he?" Andrew asked.
"That explains how we got to my house… and it looks like we came in through the window," Howard said with a strange expression, staring at his wide-open bedroom window.
The night could have been much worse than they imagined.
Out in the open, completely drunk and with only one thought in mind—"destroy the Ring"—there was no way to predict what had happened next.
Comments
alex hampton
This was so much funnier than I expected it to be granted Leonard technically cheated but still, and Pippa is gonna be pissed at him for leaving her at the party.
