Wizardly Dude
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[EOE] (286) 4.65. They’re Alright, I Guess
🕑 Added 2025-11-07 17:00:08 +0000 UTCDespite the newspaper issue already having been resolved, the council’s decision did little to repair the damage that had already been done. Vin didn’t mind the occasional person calling out to him and informing him they were glad he was out of the hospital as he walked by. In fact, he rather enjoyed the fact that Earthers he’d never met before were treating him like an actual, regular human being rather than some magical force of nature. No, it was the darting eyes many of those people had when they called out, as if hunting for the ‘elusive girlfriend’ that was said to often be hiding her face beside him.
Unfortunately, there was nothing he could do about that now, so Vin simply grit his teeth and tried to ignore it as he made his way back to his apartment. Closing the door behind him, he blinked as he turned and found Scule and Shia in a tense standoff right there in the common room. Shia had her staff at the ready, with tiny branches already spreading out around her and twitching in anticipation of grabbing the tiny man. In response, Scule had his blowgun already brought to his lips, his eyes narrow as he waited for the right opportunity to strike. He was standing on the table in order to better match his opponent in height.
Alka and Lumel both stood off to the side of the room, watching with vastly different expressions on their faces. Lumel looked worried, and Alka looked like a golem. Though based on the bright, shimmering light of her eyes, she was watching whatever was happening with excitement. Reginald sat on Alka’s shoulder, looking pensive about the whole situation.
“What the hell is going on?” Vin asked, glancing back and forth between his two friends with gazes locked on one another. “I just got out of the hospital this morning. Do we really need to do this now?”
“It’s because you just got out of the hospital that this is happening,” Shia said, her eyes never leaving the tense petian. “Scule was hanging around until you were better. But once you were cleared to leave, he decided that meant it was time to slip out and go visit his family again. Without the rest of us.”
“I said I’d think about letting you lot come with me!” Scule snapped. “I never said it was a guarantee! A man is allowed his secrets!”
“Shia, I don’t think threatening to tie Scule up again is the best way to convince him to let us meet his family,” Vin drawled, rubbing his weary eyes. “And Scule, you know Shia has Neutralize Poison at the ready, your darts aren’t going to do anything. Why don’t we all just take a big step back and calm down, alright?”
Both of his friends let out sounds that reminded him of rabid dogs, but they did just that. As the extended branches growing out of Shia’s staff decayed and Scule’s blowgun vanished back within his cape, they each grunted and nodded at one another.
“Why do you even want to meet my family so badly in the first place?” Scule demanded. “I can tell you right now my parents aren’t very interesting, and my siblings are more annoying than anything. You guys would probably have more fun running off to check out another fragment while I’m gone, or just working on your magic.”
“Are you serious? We want to meet them because they’re your family,” Shia said, as if the answer was obvious. “In case you’ve forgotten, the rest of us don’t exactly have great family situations going on. Vin ran away from home as a kid and now his parents are literally on another world. Lumel’s a bastard child and was banished from her entire fragment because of who her parents are. Alka lost her father when she was little and her mother, who was left behind on her world, thinks she’s dead. And I lost both of my parents to a monster attack as a young child, and now the man who I functionally see as my new father only gets to visit me for a few minutes every time I find a new dungeon to explore. None of us have anything even closely resembling a normal familial situation, and then there’s you, who just doesn’t get along with his parents but still visits them every month to make sure they’re okay. It’s so mundane and boring that it’s extraordinary!”
“I have to agree with Shia on this one. I was beyond shocked to hear you still had a decent-enough connection with your family,” Vin admitted. “I know you said you don’t exactly get along with your parents, but it’s not like you were banished or kicked out of the house, right? That’s got to say something.”
“They wish they could have kicked me out,” Scule grumbled, shaking his head. “I already told you guys, my parents are ashamed of who I am. Of me choosing the Rogue class, despite the fact it was the only way I knew how to provide for them and my siblings when they couldn’t handle it. Hells, they treat Reginald better than they do me whenever I bother to drop by. They probably wish they could say he was their son instead.”
Reginald squeaked his agreement, his ears drooping as he gave Scule a sad look.
“The point is, if you guys are seriously that interested in learning from the horse's mouth how much of a failure and disappointment I am, then sure, whatever, you’re welcome to join me,” Scule said, throwing up his hands.
“It’s not all bad though, right?” Shia asked, her voice growing soft. “When we were floating over that empty abyss in the sky fragment and trying to come up with some sort of plan, you mentioned how your siblings hang onto your every word and demand you tell them stories of your adventures. I thought we had our own fan club to look forward to meeting!”
“No, I suppose it’s not all bad,” Scule begrudgingly admitted. “My folks are real pieces of work, and the neighbors suck more than you could possibly imagine… but my brother and sister are a different story. After how many times they made me retell different parts of our adventures, they probably know what we’ve done better than we do at this point,” he chuckled.
“Are we going to get any names, or are they going to remain as the mysterious ‘brother and sister’ for all eternity?” Alka asked, finally chiming in.
Letting out a heavy sigh, Scule shook his head as he resigned himself to his fate. “Copi and Nute, if it’s that important to you. Copi’s fifteen, and more than a little excited about getting to finally choose his class in the near future. Nute’s only two years behind him, but acts like she knows better than the rest of us. I’ve been told it’s just a phase, but damn if it doesn’t get annoying at times.”
“Hah! We got their names out of him, now he has to let us come meet them!” Alka laughed, as if this were some unspoken rule he’d be forced to abide by.
“Yeah, yeah, I’ve already decided you idiots can come with,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Though fair warning, if you’re coming to visit, you’ll each need a gift of some sort. It’s pretty customary in petian culture to provide a gift when visiting for the first time.”
“Is that true, or just something you made up to try and get more free stuff out of people?” Shia asked, narrowing her eyes.
“For the love of… Yes, it’s true! You guys wanted to learn more about me and my family, don’t start arguing with me now that I’m trying to teach you about petians,” he snapped.
“So what kind of gift would be best?” Lumel spoke up, withdrawing slightly out of habit as everyone turned to look at her. “Assuming I’m allowed to come as well? I’d love to learn more about petians, and I’ve wanted to see the citadel ever since Vin told me about it.”
“Frankly, I’d rather we leave all these idiots behind and just you and I make the trip,” Scule snorted, waving at her dismissively. “Of course you can come. You wouldn’t believe how excited Nute got when I told her I was friends with an actual, magical princess who lived in a palace deep underwater. You’ve already got a new best friend you haven’t even met yet.”
Lumel blinked and looked entirely unprepared for what was in store for her, and Vin couldn’t help but laugh at her deer-in-headlights expression. “You didn’t answer the question, Scule, what kind of gift would be best?”
“Anything edible is always a safe bet,” Scule shrugged. “But if you’re just going to grab human-sized food, make sure it’s something that has a long shelf life. Something you guys eat in one sitting might take one of us an entire week, or longer depending on how dense it is. Cheeses, dried meats, you get the idea.”
“Would alcohol be a bad idea?” Shia asked, tapping her chin. “Not that I’m making any assumptions, but if your parents are as bad as you claim…”
“While they both suck, no, they're not alcoholics,” Scule laughed. “That’s one vice you’ll never really find in petian society. At least not in one that lives side-by-side with giant-folk. Not to say it doesn’t exist, but anyone with that kind of tendency doesn’t really last long. When a single bottle of wine is enough to literally drown yourself in three times over… That kind of person tends to die young, sad as it is.”
“This is honestly pretty exciting!” Vin said in an attempt to change the topic. His earlier woes about the newspaper incident were practically already forgotten as he racked his brain for the perfect gift for a family of petians. “To think we’ve been adventuring together for two months and we’re only just now getting a chance to meet your family. I can’t wait!”
“We’ll see how long that enthusiasm lasts,” Scule replied. “Think fast, because I’m planning to head out in like an hour. It’s still early afternoon, so no point in waiting until tomorrow to make the journey.”
“An hour? That’s not a lot of time to work with,” Shia lamented, pursing her lips. “You want us to make a good impression on your family, right?”
“My parents won’t care in the slightest about what you bring, and my siblings already think you guys are the coolest things ever,” Scule drawled. “If anything, the only people who will really judge you based on your gifts are the neighbors, and I gave up caring about what they thought about me years ago. Now, I’ll leave you guys to your last-minute gift-grabbing, I’m going to go take care of a few things before we head out. Meet me back here in an hour or I’m leaving you behind.”
Having said his part, Scule hopped off the table and made his way out of the apartment. Only then did Vin realize there was a tiny, petian-sized door built into the corner of their front door. Whatever crafter had installed that was truly skilled, because it was nearly impossible to make out unless one was looking for it.
“Okay, we only have an hour to find gifts to show Scule’s neighbors that he’s the greatest and they’re terrible people for looking down on him,” Shia said, looking around at all of them. “I know we rag on Scule a lot, but obviously he’s one of us and we want to make a good impression, even if he himself doesn’t care.”
“Don’t worry, I already have the perfect gift in mind,” Alka said, her eyes flaring with mirth as she followed Scule out of the apartment. “I’ll meet you guys back here in an hour.”
“I think I have an idea as well,” Lumel said, slowly nodding as she thought it over. “Yes, I think it will go over well.”
“Fantastic,” Shia said, turning to give Vin an exasperated look. “We only have an hour to find gifts in that case. “Any ideas?”
“You know,” Vin said, something he’d read about in the newspaper earlier sparking an idea in his mind. “I think I just might have one.”
