Abarith
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Chapter 32: The Weight of Recklessness
🕑 Added 2024-11-22 06:12:12 +0000 UTCEverything hurt.
Bright white light seeped through Jeremy’s eyelids, waking him. He felt heavy, but staying awake seemed harder than going back to sleep. His sluggish brain hadn’t caught up to the rest of him yet. The world around him was quiet except for the faint beeping somewhere nearby.
Where am I?
He tried to move his arms, his legs, but they both felt like dead weight. His muscles were stiff and unresponsive. Panic rushed through him, but his body didn’t care. It remained still, useless.
His throat was dry, painful, like he’d been screaming his lungs out, though he couldn’t remember why. The last thing he remembered: the lizards. The claws. His soul.
Jeremy gasped, his breath catching, and the sound rasped painfully in his throat. His head turned slowly, his neck protesting even that tiny movement. The blank walls, the crisp white sheets tucked around him—it all screamed hospital.
A quiet snore caught his attention. In the corner, Andrew sat slumped in a chair, his head tilted awkwardly. Jeremy couldn’t help but notice the dark circles under his eyes, as if he hadn’t slept properly in days.
“Andrew...” Jeremy tried to say, but it came out more like a whisper. His throat burned, and he coughed weakly. That sound was enough to startle Andrew awake.
Andrew’s head shot up, his eyes widening as they landed on Jeremy. “You’re awake. You’re finally awake,” he said, his voice cracking. Relief spread across his face, and he scrubbed a hand over his eyes.
Jeremy tried to sit up, but his body immediately reminded him why that was a terrible idea. He winced, falling back against the pillows. “What... happened?” His voice was barely above a whisper, rough and uneven.
“Take it easy, idiot.” Andrew’s tone was sharp, but the worry underneath softened it. He stood quickly, grabbing a cup of water from the side table and holding it out. “Here. Drink this first.”
Jeremy stared at the cup like it was an impossible task, but Andrew sighed and held it to his lips. “You’ve been out for a week,” Andrew muttered as Jeremy drank in small, careful sips.
“A week?” The words felt foreign on his tongue, his brain struggling to wrap around the time. His hand twitched, gripping the blanket covering him.
Andrew’s sharp gaze caught the motion, and he set the cup aside. “Don’t think about it,” he said firmly, his voice low. “You’re safe now. That’s all that matters.”
Safe. Jeremy wanted to believe him, but the ache inside him said otherwise. His chest felt... wrong. Empty, almost. Like something vital had been ripped out, leaving only an icy void behind. He looked down at his trembling hands and quickly balled them into fists, hiding the shakes.
Andrew cleared his throat, breaking the silence. “The doctors said something about your soul,” he began, his voice quieter, carefully measured. “They said you’re... lucky.”
Jeremy frowned, his eyes narrowing. Lucky wasn’t exactly the word he’d use to describe how he felt. He stayed silent, waiting for Andrew to continue.
“They said you’ve got a really large soul for your Tier,” Andrew explained, his tone casual on the surface, but with an tone Jeremy recognized. “Even with the chunks you tore out, there’s enough left that it’ll grow back. Slowly, yeah, but it will. Apparently, souls grow faster when there’s more of it left, like yours. But if you keep using big pieces like that...” He trailed off, his jaw tightening. “It’ll take way longer.”
Jeremy glanced at his brother, catching the flicker of understanding in his eyes. They both knew why his soul was so large—knew what the real reason was. The Amulet of Insight. But the words sat unsaid between them, neither knowing if someone else might overhear.
Jeremy clenched his fists, the blanket twisting under his grip. “It’s not like I wanted to rip out chunks of my
“No, but you came close.” His voice dipped. “Do you even get how close you were? Jeremy, they weren’t sure you’d wake up at first.”
Jeremy tried to respond, but the words stuck in his throat. His gaze dropped to his lap, his fingers curling into the blanket draped over him. He didn’t want to think about it. About how fragile he’d been—or how fragile he still felt.
Andrew sighed, dragging his chair closer. “You scared the crap out of me,” he admitted, his voice quieter now. “I thought…” He stopped, his jaw clenching. “I thought you were gone, Jeremy. And the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. You didn’t have to do any of this, but you did, and you almost didn’t come back.”
“Do you even know what it took to get to you?” His frustration seeping through. “When a day passed, we thought, ‘Okay, maybe Jeremy got cocky and stayed longer than planned.’ I mean, you’re you. We figured you were pushing yourself. But when two days passed—two, Jeremy, two—people started to notice you were missing. We had our first weapon duels, then electives, and you didn’t show up to any of them.”
Jeremy winced, his hands curling into the blanket.
“After the second day, we went to the teleporter room. The attendant said you were still alive—one occupant, she said. So, we waited. What else could we do? Everyone thought, ‘He’ll figure it out. He’ll come back.’ But two more days passed, and you didn’t come back. That’s when I stopped caring about rules. About policies. I went to the woman again, and when she told me she couldn’t authorize anyone to interfere, I—” Andrew hesitated, his face tightening, his voice dropping. “I reminded her who our parents are.”
Jeremy blinked, looking at his brother, startled. “You… did that?”
Andrew nodded slowly, his hands clenched tightly. “Yeah. I didn’t want to, but I wasn’t going to stand there and wait for them to tell me you were dead.”
Jeremy swallowed hard, his throat dry. “Andrew…”
“I went in alone. The others wanted to come, but I couldn’t let them. The dungeon was bad enough already without dragging them into it. At least I have some stats from my gear. And you—you were so deep in the maze, Jeremy. There was blood everywhere. It was smeared on walls, on the floor. Like you’d just collapsed there for a while before dragging yourself forward.”
Jeremy clenched his fists, his voice sharp. “It’s not like I wanted to drag anyone into this! I didn’t ask for any of it, Andrew!”
Andrew shot back, his voice rising. “You didn’t have to! You go charging into danger like you can’t wait to show off, and I’m the one stuck cleaning up after you!”
“Oh, so this is about me showing off again, huh? You’re jealous, aren’t you? You can’t stand it! That’s why you didn’t want a suite near me!”
Andrew’s face turned red. “Jealous? You think I want to deal with your mess? You don’t get it, Jeremy. I can’t stop comparing myself to you! I don’t even need anyone else to do it—it’s in my head every time I fail!”
Jeremy’s voice cracked as he yelled back. “You’re comparing yourself to me? How is that my fault? I never showed off in front of you. I never teased you for unlocking Skills faster than you. And now you show up and hang out with the group and I’m supposed to pretend that everything’s all right? You’re still acting like this is some kind of competition!”
Andrew shot back, “You think I wanted to watch you almost die? I thought I was going to lose you! Just like—” He stopped, his voice choking on the next word.
The silence between them was heavy, the name neither had spoken in weeks hanging unspoken in the air. Jeremy’s throat tightened, and he looked down at his trembling hands. “I miss her too,” he whispered, barely audible. “Every time I mess up, I think about her—about how she’d call me an idiot and then help me fix it anyway.”
Andrew’s voice dropped, trembling. “I heard you, you know. Running. I followed the blood trail, but I heard your footsteps before I saw you. They echoed through the maze, this desperate sound. I thought you were being chased—something had to be after you, right? But then I realized…” He trailed off, shaking his head. “It was just you, alone, running the same path through the maze.”
Jeremy’s breath hitched. He didn’t remember that, not all of it, but the edges of those moments flickered in his mind, hazy and distorted.
Andrew leaned back, letting out a shaky breath. “When I saw you, you didn’t even know I was there. You just… kept running past me. I couldn’t catch up, and you wouldn’t hear me. Do you know how insane that was to watch? Huh? I watched my brother run himself to death like an absolute moron, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.”
Jeremy faltered. “I wasn’t trying to make you feel like that. I just…”
“You just what? Thought you’d be fine? Thought you could handle it?” Andrew threw his hands up. “Well, guess what, genius? You couldn’t! You were wrong! You were so busy trying to prove... whatever dumb thing you were trying to prove, you almost didn’t come back!”
Jeremy winced. “I didn’t mean for—”
“Of course, you didn’t mean for it!” Andrew snapped, cutting him off. “That’s the problem! You didn’t think, Jeremy! You didn’t think about anything except how much you wanted to show off! What, you thought you’d come out of that dungeon, looking all cool and unbeatable, ready to dominate the first duel? Guess what? You didn’t even show up for it! The first duels came and went, and you were still out there running yourself into the ground like an idiot!”
Jeremy’s stomach twisted at the mention of the duels. He had wanted to make a big impression—to prove he was better than just his family name.
Andrew wasn’t done. “And do you know who else you dragged into this mess? The teleporter attendant. Yeah, the one who still had a job before this. After I got you back, Mom and Dad showed up while you were still unconscious. I mean, Mom! She was there, sitting right by your bed. They stayed there for an entire day, just staring at you, waiting for you to wake up.”
Jeremy blinked, stunned. His mom? Here?
Andrew continued, his tone sharper. “But then—oh, here’s the fun part—Mom went straight to the teleporter attendant after visiting you. She was so mad, Jeremy, I thought she was going to vaporize the woman on the spot. Like, seriously, she was really scary. Dad just stood there watching like it was just a normal Tuesday. I bet she would’ve done it too, if the headmaster hadn’t shown up to stop her.”
Jeremy’s eyes widened. “She didn’t actually—”
“No, she didn’t. But only because the headmaster compromised. The attendant still got fired, though, because apparently, you pulling that stunt was her fault somehow. And now the entire academy knows what happened. Do you get that, Jeremy? Everyone knows.”
Jeremy’s heart sank. He could feel the weight of Andrew’s words pressing down on him.
“So, congrats. Not only did you almost kill yourself, but you also got someone fired, pissed off Mom, and turned this whole thing into a show! All because you couldn’t stop and think for two seconds.”
“I didn’t know it would get that bad,” Jeremy admitted, looking away. “I didn’t think anyone else would be hurt. I’m sorry.”
Andrew sighed, dragging a hand through his hair. “Yeah, well, sorry doesn’t fix it. You’re not some invincible hero, Jeremy. You’re just a dumb kid—same as me! And you almost...” His voice cracked, and he stopped, rubbing a hand over his face. “You almost didn’t come back.”
“I didn’t mean to make you worry,” Jeremy replied, his voice small.
Andrew’s voice softened, his shoulders slumping. “But if you keep being stupid like this, you’re going to be gone too. First Alicia, now you. I can’t handle that Jeremy.”
“I miss her so much you know. I wish it was like before,” Jeremy admitted, his voice cracking. “When it was the three of us. When things weren’t so messed up. When it didn’t feel like everything was falling apart.”
Andrew nodded, his gaze fixed on the floor. “Me too,” he whispered. “I don’t know how we ended up here, but… I hate it. I hate how everything feels so wrong without her.”
Jeremy couldn’t hold back anymore. The tears spilled over, and before he knew it, Andrew was beside him, pulling him into a hug. It was awkward, clumsy even, but neither cared. They clung to each other like they were holding on to the last pieces of what used to be.
“I’m sorry,” Jeremy sobbed into Andrew’s shoulder. “I’m sorry for everything. I didn’t mean to scare you. I didn’t mean to mess things up so bad.”
Andrew’s voice was thick with emotion as he replied, “I’m sorry too. For blaming you. For being a jerk about everything. I just… I miss her so much, Jeremy. And I don’t want to lose you too.”
They stayed like that for a long time, their shared grief pouring out in broken sobs and whispered apologies.
Andrew gave a weak chuckle, his voice quiet. “Yeah, well, you’re still a moron.” He shook his head, squeezing Jeremy one last time before letting go. “Can we not do this again? Like, ever?”
Jeremy nodded quickly, wiping tears from his eyes. “Yeah. Next time... just stop me before I do something stupid.”
“You say that like it’s easy. You make being stupid a full-time job.”
Jeremy laughed, the sound rough but real.
Andrew blinked suddenly, looking confused. “Wait, what was that?” he muttered, his brow furrowing as he stared at nothing in particular.
“What was what?”
“I… I just unlocked Introspection. Of all the times…”
For a moment, the room was silent as they processed the absurdity. Then Jeremy started to laugh—loud, almost uncontrollable. Andrew joined in.
“You unlock Introspection now?” Jeremy wheezed, clutching his aching ribs. “After yelling at me for being dumb?”
Andrew rolled his eyes, though he couldn’t stop laughing. “Guess I needed it to figure out why you’re such a pain.”
Their laughter filled the quiet room, echoing off the sterile walls. For a brief moment, it felt like Alicia was laughing with them, like the three of them were together again.
When their laughter finally subsided, Jeremy wiped at his eyes and shook his head. “This place really is ridiculous sometimes.”
“Yeah, but at least it’s never boring.” Andrew leaned back in his chair.
Then Andrew’s smile faltered as he seemed to remember something. “Oh, crap. Mom and Dad. They wanted to be messaged as soon as you woke up.” He groaned, reaching for his communicator. “They’re probably going to kill me for not telling them earlier.”
Jeremy gave him a mock-serious nod. “Better you than me.”
Andrew glared at him half-heartedly as he tapped on the device. “You owe me for this.”
“Add it to the list,” Jeremy said, leaning back against the pillow. His grin softened into something more genuine. “Thanks, Andrew.”
Jeremy felt his chest feeling a little lighter. For the first time in a long time, Jeremy didn’t feel so alone.
