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Zenith of Sorcery, Chapter 18 - Incursion

🕑 Added 2024-12-23 02:53:50 +0000 UTC

Comments

Faa Diallo

Early call but we got a regressor

Faa Diallo

Lol that was a funny ref to Avatar

Lars Huluk

I would find it useful to get a short reminder, and in general seeing more of their personalities always helps

Tim Deral

I feel that perhaps it would be better if the author would maybe not do that? if he is gonna start to write details on all 10 + students while world building he will never be able to progress the story

Tim Deral

Yeah I was wondering whether her guardian would notice actually

Andrew Browne

Make them introduce themselves to celer sounds natural to me. I'm sure some readers will appreciate it :) It could be amusing watching celer blurting things students want to keep secret (most obviously Iris - "are you sure you're from this planet?")

Tim Deral

Wonderful chapter, I throughly enjoyed myself. Also that one line about One student thinking that he is wearing more made me laugh out loud, Like fine vintage !

Domagoj Kurmaic

I didn't note it in this chapter, but yes, Iris already has a soul seed. :) As it has been a week since she joined.

Domagoj Kurmaic

Yeah, the first day for them has long passed, but I'm sure I could find an excuse if I wanted to. Maybe he wants to introduce all of them to Celer, or makes a big deal out of checking on each of them after some time has passed. My main worry was whether the readers would even find it useful. It's obviously not entirely necessary from a plot perspective to do this scene.

DiabolicalGenius

Thanks for the chapter! This one was good too. We got to meet and get first impressions of the new students along with seeing the reactions of existing students. We also learned a bit more about Chaos storms. And predictably that troll who made a mess for him at the academy was waiting for them when they got back. Fortunately the girl herself stepped in after seeing Shamshir acting like such an ass and was able to make a much better impression on him. Iris might have been able to tell that he'd appreciate doing away with the bullshit and getting some sincerity. Or maybe she was just completely done with her uncle herself. Funny as it is to watch, he's the kind of guy you'd hate to deal with in real life. So looks like she's the most likely to bring trouble out of all his students. So naturally he had to tempt fate with that thought that there was no way someone from the eastern lands would show up to call him out on his bullshit, right? Who wants to bet that he made a lot bigger impression on the locals during his travels than he himself bothered to take notice of? Enough that some people from those places will come looking for him sooner or later? Easy bet right?

Andrew Browne

I wonder if Marcus will soulseed Iris, or if that may be considered a provocation.

Andrew Browne

Imo it would be fine to just give a list with notes, outside the story. It would also be fine to do it in a way that feels natural, like.. "Marcus looked over his students, assembled in front of him, genuinely pondering how to best instruct each individual. X was ...description.... Marcus would have to make sure X improved on ..weakness... Then there was Y, who...". Marcus thinking all these things internally feels natural. It would also make sense for Marcus to do it as a team building exercise, if they're not getting along. I guess it is a common first day of school thing irl - but the first day for most of them has passed. Imo it is most useful to give name and some quick reminders each time they appear (can do both approaches). It is usually some time between reading chapters and I have already (once) thought "wait, was this the kid who ...". Being able to refer to a chapter is nice, but having reminders locally is handy.

Andrew Browne

> Also, I have a question for you: how do you feel about a section where every one of Marcus's students introduces themselves and Marcus gives some brief observations about them. Now that his students have all been assembled (spoiler, I guess) I was thinking of giving a bit of a reminder/description of them in one place, but I'm worried that it's it will be redundant/superfluous. What do you all think?