Macronomicon
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Chapter 184: Trial Failed Successfully
🕑 Added 2025-08-13 19:05:12 +0000 UTCWilliam Oh is the ultimate wingman. He once broke the ice between a centaur and a mermaid. They’re still together to this day actually, making those disgusting half-human, quarter horse, quarter fish babies that raid the coastal villages of Del’mar.
Regardless of how ill-advised that match was, or how we’re still paying for it now, William Oh did it. because he is the ultimate wingman.
- Jason Salazar
Welcome to the Class Advancement Trial.
Using a portion of power of the Sacrifices User has provided this far, a synthetic body has been created for the Trial. User’s consciousness has been projected into it.
In the blink of an eye, the connection to Will’s real body snapped, and his only perspective was standing in a blank white space, naked and panting from shock.
Will waved his hand in front of his face.
I can see!
User will now be given an objective. Complete the objective and the trial will end. Fail the objective or die and the trial will end.
You are free to accomplish the objective in whatever way you see fit. Class Advancement is determined after the trial has ended. Failure does not prevent Class Advancement, but may negatively affect the outcome.
In order to minimize turbulence, you will be prevented from providing any details regarding your identity or background.
Your objective is to neutralize or remove the Miasmatic Host that has taken up residence in the concert hall opposite the university. Failing that, protect Professor Lauren Holdna from the Miasmatic Host. Use whatever means necessary.
Lauren who-
There was a sudden sensation of falling, and suddenly Will was in a dimly lit room, surrounded by other naked Climbers, each of them jerking in place as though they had missed a step on a staircase. Presumably they’d all landed here at the exact same moment.
It didn’t say there would be others, Will thought. Didn’t say there wouldn’t be either.
Must be incredibly difficult if there was this many Climbers. At least a dozen.
They silently glanced at each other. Any level 50 worth their salt wouldn’t make noise when they didn’t know what the situation was.
Will held up his hand in the universal sign for ‘scout’.
Three other Climbers held up the sign, while others indicated themselves as ‘nukers’ ‘tanks’ and ‘warriors’, organizing themselves wordlessly.
Will did a double-take at one of the warriors.
He looked a little younger, but that was definitely Lord Bakton. Likely the age he was when he Advanced his class.
Bakton caught Will staring and raised a brow.
Will shrugged and shook his head.
Not much we can do about the existential questions raised by time travel, especially if our memory is getting erased.
The room was suddenly cast in a harsh red light as a voice began speaking from everywhere at once.
“Miasmatic Host detected. Multiple smaller Miasmatic signatures detected inside the compound. All hands report to stations.”
Will frowned and cocked his head at the strange words and the stranger accent. It sounded…old.
Unfortunately, he didn’t have any more time to think about it, as the door to the room was kicked open, and a human wearing strange, bulky clothes and wielding what seemed to be the stock of a crossbow stormed into the room.
“CONTACT!” The strangely dressed human shouted before pulling the trigger.
The room erupted into a deafening cacophony as lead bullets began to stream from the little hole at the front of the crossbow stock, at roughly the speed that Will’s phantom hand could throw them.
Will and the others with high speed simply avoided the barrel, zipping around the room.
Nukers held up shields that glowed miasmatic blue as the bullets bounced off, and Tank…tanked it.
“Ow.” One of the tanks grunted, flicking one of the flattened bullets off his chest, revealing a forming bruise.
“You little-“ one of the nukers muttered, fire blooming from his hand.
“HOLD UP!” Bakton said, standing between them and the human while Will sprinted past him and confiscated the strange weapon. Behind the human with the streange weapon were half a dozen more.
Willl confiscated their weapons as they raised them.
“Killing these men isn’t our Objective! If anything we’re probably here to help.” Bakton said, gesturing for calm.
A leader even then, Will thought, sprinting across the ceiling above the gawking soldiers.
Phantom Eye.
103 Charges remaining
Will’s view split into two, and he sent the eye the other direction, scouting out the hall in both directions.
Maybe I shouldn’t have given Reggie the Dimensional Coiled Serpent Amulet. It would come in handy right no-
Will checked his Phantom Hand’s slots.
They were empty.
Nevermind. They really did just make a copy of me, so it’s just my base stats.
I guess I can find a relic and slot it for now. More importantly, where can I find some pants?
Will came to a T, and split off another couple Phantom Eyes before heading back, absorbing the information as he returned to where Bakton was taking control of the situation.
“Who are you people?” One of the subdued civilians asked.
“We were sent here to destroy the Miasmatic Host,” Bakton said. “Failing that, we are to protect Professor Lauren Holdna.”
“…Naked?” one of the civilians blurted before another human, seemingly the man’s boss, took over the conversation.
“You can’t destroy the Host,” one of the civilians said. “The miasma out there will turn you to sludge in a matter of seconds. Pee pee ee for that level of miasma doesn’t exist.”
“We’ll be fine.” Bakton said. “But we need to get our bearings. No sense sprinting out into the miasma before we know where the Host is. Take us to your leader, and this Lauren Holdna.”
“I…can’t do that. You don’t have any proof you’re not apparitions.”
“Their leader’s down the hall to the right, another right on the third hall, past an 8-inch thick metal door, with a bunch of people wearing weird white coats. There’s three women, and I imagine this Lauren is one of those three.” Will said, watching the man with the frazzled hair barking orders while the people in the white coats either cowered, rocking in place, or wiggled their fingers on strange rectangles with manic desperation.
One of the women in particular seemed a likely candidate, as she studied a dozen magical windows into different sections of the building, her fingers flying across her rectangular finger-thingy.
The other two women were staring blankly into the wall, hyperventilating as if they were coming face to face with their death.
Will couldn’t imagine The Tower sending him to save someone who wasn’t competent, so that made him think they were supposed to protect the one that hadn’t given up.
Will’s Phantom eye approached maybe-Lauren, studying her and the strange desk she worked at.
She was kind of cute, actually, with black hair and lenses, and a serious expression.
In one of her windows, Will even made out himself, standing alone in the hall, from a point of view above his left shoulder. Curious, Will turned and spotted a strange lump in the ceiling that reminded him of the turrets on the 8th Floor.
Watching over the woman’s shoulder with Phantom Eye, Will saw his image turn and look straight at her.
She froze, her eyes locked on Will.
Will winked and gave her a thumbs-up, causing her breath to hitch.
Weird stuff, Will thought, returning his attention to current situation.
“That way? Thank you, scout.” Bakton said, leaning down to retrieve a long knife from the belt of one of the civilians.
“’smajob, B-” Will tries to call him Bakton, but the Lord’s name wouldn’t leave his mouth.
Interesting. No names.
“Thes people don’t seem dangerous, but let’s get a damage chain going just in case.” Bakton said, and the assembled Climbers nodded, making it so.
Once that was done, the dozen climbers sprinted down the halls, heading unerringly for the door with all the people cowering behind it, until they came across the steel door Will had sent Phantom Eye through.
They’re getting really upset, Will thought, watching the panic levels rise as the climbers headed straight for them, bypassing the labyrinthine corridors thanks to Will’s scouting.
And yet, through it all, the person he’d assumed to be the Professor didn’t grow any more or less agitated, their fingers flying across the black rectangle..doing…something.
“There’s about four of them pointing those weird bullet-shooters at the door,” Will said, standing back as Bakton approached.
“Understood.”
“And It seems like some of them might be considering suicide,” Will reported, watching a couple of the men with big bars on their shoulders put those strange weapons to their temples.
“Can anyone CC?” Bakton asked, glancing over his shoulder.
One of the nukers nodded and flung a Charge forward, and everyone in the room froze.
“Yep, they’re neutralized.” Will said with a nod.
“Excellent.” Bakton took the knife in hand and carved a hole in the steel door, allowing them to step through single-file.
The civilians’ weapons were confiscated, and the paralysis was withdrawn, allowing them to breathe.
“Greetings, civilians. We have come to assist in neutralizing the Miasmatic Host and protect Professor Lauren Holdna.” Bakton said.
Will spotted the woman at her desk hold her breath.
Yep, that’s the one.
“I’m not a goddamn civilian! Who the hell are you!?” one of the older men with fancy bars on his shoulders demanded, pointing at Bakton. “Who sent you!?”
Bakton frowned, seemingly wanting to say things, but unable to.
“Can’t say,” he finally said with a shrug. “Which one of you is Professor Holdna?”
“This one,” the older man said, dragging one of the hyperventilating women to her feet. “Take her.”
“No-I” The woman looked like she was about to pass out from fright. She also wasn’t who they were looking for. Will could tell just by reading the man’s sneaky glances at the real one.
Will was just about to point out the right one, when she stood away from the desk and turned to face them.
“I’m professor Lauren Holdna,” She said, turning to face them, back straight and head lifted.
Wow, she’s cute, Will thought. Maybe fifteen years older than him, which kind of put her out of his league, but definitely Will’s type. A lot like an older Brianna, actually.
Just needs an apron with some flour stains…And standing up in a situation like this…brave, too.
“Protection on her,” Bakton said, pointing.
Will volunteered, along with a Tank and two warriors, creating a makeshift four-man guard detail.
“Where are we, and which way is the Host?” Bakton demanded, scanning the rest of the room. “We’re gonna kill it.”
“And where can we get some goddamn pants?” Will chimed in.
That single humanizing request seemed to rachet down the tension.
“You can’t attack the Host, and you can’t evacuate the professor,” The older man with fancy shoulderpads said, slumping down into his seat. “The miasma is too high outside. You’ll all be screaming puddles of goo in a matter of seconds. In a few seconds more you’ll be another one of the monsters clawing at the bunker’s walls.
…There’s nowhere to go.”
“Nevertheless,” Bakton said. “Point us where we need to go, and we will make it happen.”
“…It’s hopeless.”
To their surprise, Professor Holdna reached into the man’s coat and pulled out a weird shiny knob before shoving him out of his chair and taking his seat, shoving the knob into a slot that matched it.
“You give up when you’re dead, John!” the professor shouted, her fingers wiggling on another rectangle-shaped projection.
A strange illusion of a map appeared on the table’s surface.
“This is the bunker. Here’s the Host. It’s flooding the area with Miasma that will kill everyone in the city in a matter of hours. We can let you out the airlock and all you have to do is take a left. Follow the road about two blocks and you’ll come across the concert hall and university. The concert hall’s on the right.
She motioned with her hand and the map of the bunker expanded until they could see all the individual hallways.
She drew a line with her finger, creating a line on the map.
“Here’s where we are. Follow this route to the armory, where you’ll be able to get weapons” – she glanced at Will – “and pants. Then go here to reach the airlock. Wait for us to let you through, because if you just cut your way out, all of us will-“
At the mention of people leaving the bunker, the ‘John’ fellow’s eyes widened. “Under no circumstances will I allow you to-”
Will backhanded the older fellow to the ground, false teeth flying out of his mouth.
“You are in no position to allow anything.” Will said.
“Thank you, scout.” Baktons said.
“No problem, warrior.” Will replied.
Bakton turned his attention to the professor.
“This armory, does it have real weapons or just these underwhelming lead-shooters that couldn’t kill anything above the 4th Floor?” Bakton asked.
“Ummm.” She slowly shrugged, seemingly confused by their line of questioning.
“Swords. Relics. Any of those?” Bakton pressed.
The Professor shook her head.
“Preposterous.”
“I’ve got an idea.” Will said, holding up a finger.
He shaped the armor on his Phantom hand into a narrow blade and cut a rough saber out of the solid steel door, tossing it to Bakton.
“You seem like the saber type.” Will said.
“…Have we fought each other before?” Bakton asked with a frown as he pinched his fingertips down the steel blade, straightening and sharpening it to his satisfaction.
“Can’t say,” Will replied with a grin. “Anybody else need a weapon?”
In a matter of minutes, Will had carved the door into five or so makeshift weapons. not great, but good enough to kill some of the small fry outside and hopefully get some Relics out of them.
The professor led them down the hall to the armory, with Will and the other bodyguards surrounding her.
“Do you bake?”
“…What?” the professor asked, glancing up at Will.
“As a hobby. Do you bake?”
“Kid, if you’re flirting in an attempt to take my mind off the prospect of imminent death, you’re doing a lousy job, and no, I don’t bake as a hobby. I hunt. When I’m not working, I like to get out, become one with nature and all the beautiful animals. Then shoot them. Not that nature exists anymore, but it was nice to shoot at while it lasted. Haven’t really had time for vacation anyway last couple years though, ya know?”
Will blinked.
“…Huh.”
The Professor lowered her voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “How can you be this relaxed? Why do you guys have miasma signatures? Where did you come from? Did you actually know I was looking at you? Are you a telepath? Are you guys secret super soldiers immune to miasma, cloned in a vat or something? Did Dr A. figure out teleportation? And John? John’s a tough old bastard. How did you knock him out with a single backhand? You couldn’t weigh more than a hundred and forty pounds, and he’s pushing two fifty, and leaner than you’d think.”
“Can’t say,” Will said, shaking his head.
“Why are you like ten years younger than the rest of these guys?” She asked.
“I assume because he’s some kind of prodigy.” Bakton said, glancing over his shoulder, gaze lingering on Will.
“…You guys don’t know each other?” The professor asked, frowning, scanning the climbers as she walked alongside them.
The assembled Climbers glanced around, their gaze coming to an unspoken agreement before they shrugged.
“Can’t say!” The Climbers all said as one, before breaking into gales of laughter and good-natured shoulder-punching.
A minute later, they came across the armory, and as expected, it was disappointing, but there were enough pants and shirts for everyone, which at least made them feel more comfortable.
“Oooh, these socks are nice,” Will said slipping on the heavenly-soft socks on over his feet before lacing up the boots.
The materials were weird, but clothes were clothes, and in a matter of minutes, everyone had their junk securely tucked away and were marching to the ‘airlock’.
Will pictured it as some kind of music-based lock, like a flute that you had to play certain chords to open a door.
It turned out not to be that. It was two doors that prevented airflow while entering or leaving a room. How boring was that?
“Here, I grabbed you guys some Mike’s,” she said, holding out tiny little pale lumps of…something.
“Mike’s what?” Will asked.
“Mike’s.” She said, cocking her head. “Microphones? Communicators? Radios?”
The group just stared at her.
The professor’s eyebrows rose as she took in their blank expressions.
“Okay, just, do as I do.” She said with the tone one might speak to a child, taking one in hand and showing it to them. “You see the little hole? Place that side inward and put the whole thing in your ear.” She proceeded to do so. shoving the little thing all the way inside her ear. “It will let me talk to you while you’re outside.”
Will and the others did as they were instructed and jammed the weird thingies in their ears.
“I don’t know what agency made you guys, but clearly it was a rush job,” She muttered, her voice echoing in their ears.
“I’ll stay in here with the professor.” The tank said.
“I’ll clear the surrounding area,” Will said, the warriors dedicated to guarding the professor nodding alongside him.
“The rest of us will stage an attack on the Host.” Bakton said.
“Alright, I’ll watch you fellas on the cameras, and we’ll see if you really are immune to miasma like you say.” The Professor said, slapping a palm on a black rectangle beside the first door. “Either that or I get to watch you make a mess of my airlock.”
The door opened, and all the Climbers, minus the one tank, entered the tiny mini-room.
A moment later, the second door opened, and a flood of Miasma rushed in and slapped them all in the face.
And…I’m blind again. Great. Will thought sourly.
Phantom Eye.
100 Charges remaining.
The Miasma hit like a sledgehammer, but it did little more than rock the Climbers on their heels. It wasn’t too bad. The main problem was the horde of monsters rushing the newly opened door.
They were obviously former humans, but it wasn’t because the wildly mutated monsters had any semblance of humanity: That was long gone.
It was the scraps of clothing caught in carapaces or spines fluttering in the wind like flags as they sprinted forward, jaws and mandibles twitching with some blend of feral rage and unrelenting hunger.
Will knew they could only represent a small fraction of the population, most had simply died. And yet, they were everywhere.
Unfortunately, these newly-minted monsters were up against level 50’s.
BOOM!
The Nukers cleared the surrounding area with fire and lightning, and the melee Climbers pushed into the empty space, cutting a path towards the road ahead.
When Will got a moment to look around with the Phantom Eye, he was amazed to note that the place looked almost identical to the city in the 8th Floor, with tall buildings coated in glass, and perfect roads that looked like they had been squared off by a razor-blade.
Does society just look this way when the population gets this high, or is it the other way around?
When he turned the Phantom Eye around and glanced behind him, he paused for a moment upon seeing the distinctive beam of miasmatic blue shooting upwards out of the dour grey building and disappearing into the night sky.
Key site? Will thought, frowning.
Are all key Sites these ‘bunkers’?
Are we on an upper Floor?
Will shook his head. If he wouldn’t remember this, there was no sense overthinking it. best to accomplish the mission to the best of his ability.
Will and the two warriors stayed and held the line after the away group faded from view.
They didn’t have proper gear, so the first thing they did once the flood of monsters slowed down was stack up the bodies and try to shake some Relics out of their decomposing flesh.
It wasn’t looking good, though. For some reason, no Relics were spawning. Will and the two Warriors exchanged glances, coming to the same question, but unable to speak it.
The Tower isn’t creating Relics. Is that part of the test, or are we outside The Tower?
“What are you doing with those bodies?” the Professor’s voice spoke directly into his ear, causing Will to jump in place. After nearly half an hour of silence, he’d forgotten she could do that.
“Looking for Relics,” Will said.
“What are those?”
“…Can’t say.” Will said, shaking his head.
“Oh crap. Get back inside.” The professor’s voice called, causing all three of them to twitch. “Get back inside right now!”
A series of sharp pops crackled through their ears as Will and the other two ran back to the airlock, where the first door swung open, allowing them to duck in before it slammed shut behind them.
The last thing he felt before the door closed was a swell of Miasma, waves breaking on a lakeshore when something big moved past.
“What’s going on?” Will asked, watching in fascination as the Miasma in the airlock was sucked into the ceiling, shifting in color as it was concentrated and pumped away from them.
A moment later, the door opened, allowing them to rush inside.
“Your team’s radios went dead and the Host is moving towards us. We’re gonna turtle up and hope it doesn’t notice us.
“With an enormous beam of concentrated miasma sticking out of the top of the building?” Will asked.
“…yes. And how did you know about that?” the professor’s voice spoke in his ear.
“Can’t say,” Will replied, sprinting beside the other bodyguards towards the professor.
They screeched to a halt in the control room, where the ‘john’ fellow who had been laid out before, was now slumped against the wall, his torso perforated in multiple places.
One of those little handheld civilian pellet-dispensers was sitting on the table beside the professor, trace amounts of sulfiric smoke lingering in the air and escaping the front hole.
“What happened?” Will asked.
“John tried to stop me from letting you back in. I disagreed.” The Professor said.
The warrior standing beside Will whistled.
“Hot.”
“Nice.”
The professor glanced up at the four remaining Climbers, eyes narrowed.
“…What is wrong with you people?”
Will and the others shared a look, and shrugged. Learned apathy towards death?
“Can’t say.”
“This John fellow shot the professor in the back of the head.” Their Tank said, touching the back of his head and wincing. “Probably thought he could regain control of the situation somehow.”
Will gave the oversized Tank a grateful fist-bump, and turned his attention back to the professor.
“Why are we protecting you?” Will asked.
“Wha-“ The black-haired woman glanced up from the map and scanned them. “I-I don’t know.”
“What do you do that makes you so valuable that” – The Tower sent us.
“I don’t know, okay? Lauren said, throwing up her hands. “I’m a mid-level miasmatic researcher at best. I don’t have friends in high places or a mega-genius brain that would let me get past the hump. I’m no Einstein, and I’m not married to one either.”
“Although I am single,” She continued, contemplatively. “It’s just that finding men with the same tastes is difficult. Like, a nerd who also enjoys spending a weekend out in nature going feral and killing things is a goddamn unicorn. It’s not my fault my dad took me out hunting with him when I was little, but now the only matches I get are gross rednecks whose cousin/brother helped them set up an account…”
Will’s eye twitched as the word ‘married’ lodged in his brain. It gave him the inkling of an idea. A really, really stupid idea.
In the middle of Lauren’s complaints, the entire bunker bucked like a bitten horse. Will and the other Climbers barely kept their feet while the civilians were thrown about wildly.
“Shit!” the professor cursed, dragging herself back to her feet with the table, peering down at the map projected on the surface of the table.
A big red circle was now directly on top of their ‘Bunker’.
Will’s eyes narrowed, and he spotted a subtle distortion in the map, like someone had lightly smeared the picture in the shape of a figure-eight.
“It’s right on top of us.” Lauren said, her face pale. “If it breaks the pump, we’re all dead.
“My damage link can cover miasma.” The Tank said. “I used to work for-“ The tank’s words were cut off, but the other three Climbers nodded. “We can get her somewhere safe.”
He used to work for a bussing service. No wonder he took the escort role.
“Are there tunnels or something we can use to get around this Host?” Will asked, tapping the big red dot perched over the Bunker, his hair standing on end as his fingernail came down on the smeared figure-eight.
“That depends, there’s a nearby electrical tunnel, but can you guys cut through five feet of concrete?” Lauren asked with a snide glance.
“…Yes.” Will said, frowning. “She saw us cut through a solid steel door, right?” He turned back to her. “You saw that, right?”
“Whatever, It’s been a long day! People throwing fireballs and shit, how am I supposed to know everything you can do?” The professor sulked.
“Alright, everybody that doesn’t wanna die here, let’s go die somewhere else!” Lauren said, pumping her fist with forced enthusiasm.
“Actually, we were only tasked with keeping you safe.” Will said.
“My friends come with me, or I kill myself, and you fail your mission.” She said, gesturing to the other four individuals with white coats. “Better lights-out than turning into a monster.” Lauren’s eyes narrowed as she picked up the pistol from the floor.
“You couldn’t kill yourself if you tried.” The bussing Tank said, arms crossed.
“fuuUuck YOU!” Lauren cried, putting the weapon to her temple.
BOOM!
“Ow.” The tank grunted, a bruise forming on his temple as the damage was transferred to him.
The metal weapon fell out of Lauren’s shaking hand as a flattened piece of lead tumbled away from her head.
The warrior beside Will whistled. “Hot.”
“Nice.” The other one said.
“WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?” Lauren shouted.
“Can you protect all of them from miasma?” Will asked the Tank. “I get the feeling if she’s willing to kill herself, she’ll definitely find a way to make trouble if we don’t bring the others.”
The tank sighed.
“…Fine.”
“You good?” Will asked the trembling professor.
“N-not r-r-really.” She said, shivering, her body recovering from an absolute shitstorm of adrenaline.
Crack!
The bunker jerked again, and the red flashing lights were joined by a dispassionate voice speaking from everywhere.
Miasmatic converter disabled. Miasmatic seal is broken. Evacuate immediately.
“Evacuate where, you dumb bitch!?” the professor shouted, shaking her fist at the ceiling.
“The miasma isn’t going to hurt you,” Will said. “He’s got that under control, but we need to move so that whatever that is doesn’t kill us all. Show us where the tunnel is.”
As he spoke, Will could see the Miasma slowly drifting into the room.
“O-okay.”
Lauren sprinted to a boxy metal door with a button beside it, her friends and the Climbers sprinting after her.
She yanked a card off her collar and placed it against a patch of black beside the doors.
A little red light blinked at the top of the black rectangle.
“That son of a bitch!” Lauren shouted, turning back to them. “He locked me out of the elevator. Can you-”
“Allow me,” One of the Warriors strode forward and jammed his makeshift sword through the door, peeling it back with the squeak of tortured steel.
The other one stood opposite his partner, peeling the other panel back.
Between the two of them, they opened a man-sized hole in the flimsy steel, revealing a long shaft that led into darkness.
“This is called an elevator?” Will asked, pointing. He’d been kind of miffed not to know it’s name when he was on the 8th Floor.
“Yeah,” Lauren said, giving them a strange look. Among all the other strange looks she was giving them, it didn’t particularly stand out.
“Alright,” Will said, wrapping Phantom Hand’s armor around his body like a harness. “climb on, I’ll be the elevator today.”
Will held out his arms.
“What do you-“
Lauren squeaked when Will lifted himself up, floating directly in front of her.
“I knew you were a telepath!”
BOOM!
Inner wall breached. Miasmatic Host is inside the base. All personnel evacuate immediately.
“Not even close. Everyone climb on, now!” Will said.
The men and women in the white coats grabbed onto Will, and he picked all of them up and levitated into the elevator shaft and began lowering them.
one of the warriors peered down after Will and the civilians. “I’m not a fan of dark, tight spaces. I’ll just buy you some time and die here!” He called down after them. “Good luck!”
Will gave him a thumbs-up.
The other two Climbers hopped down after them once Will and the civilians were out of the way.
“This way!” the professor shouted, leading the way as soon as Will pried apart the doors to the lowest level. That only lasted until she ran out of breath, which happened pretty damn fast.
Civilians.
They ran hard down a long hall that seemed to go on forever, with the Climbers picking up the slowpokes and moving at speeds that made their cargo squeal with terror.
“Here!” Lauren shouted, pointing at a door.
Will snapped to a halt and kicked his way through the door, revealing an empty room filled with desks and papers.
“This corner of this room is only five feet away from an electrical access tunnel that stretched for blocks.” She said pointing as she glanced back at them. “Can you cut it?”
The tank and the warrior’s eyes turned to Will.
“What?”
“A scout who can fly, eh?” The Tank said. “I think I know you. Never thought I’d meet you in person.”
The warrior nodded and pointed to his left hand.
“Can’t say.” Will said, shaping the armor on Phantom Hand into a blade before cutting out a four-foot wide plug of ‘concrete’ out of the wall and dragging it out, revealing a crawlable tunnel that emerged into a slightly larger one.
“Now what is that if not telekinesis?” Lauren demanded.
“Can’t say,” Will said ushering the professor and her colleagues forward.
They climbed into the poorly lit tunnel that smelled faintly of lightning, picked a direction and began sprinting.
In a matter of seconds, the grating noises and the annoying omnipresent voice faded to nothing, and Will sighed in relief.
“Thank the gods that alarm is finally quiet.” Will groaned, idly plucking the weird Mike thing out of his ear and tossing it aside.
“Gods?” the professor asked, frowning.
Will didn’t respond.
They travelled like that for a while, sprinting along with the civilians on their backs until they ran out of tunnel.
Once that happened, they poked their heads above-ground and kept moving, eventually holing up in what the professor called a ‘skyscraper’.
The more distance they got from the Host, the less intense the miasma got, and below a certain point, it was quiet enough that they could catch some sleep.
No time limit on this trial. Will thought as he laid down and closed his eyes. That must be why some people are bedridden for days before their consciousness is returned to them.
In the morning, the civilians raided parts of the skyscraper and came back with cans of different foods, passing them around.
Will and the other Climbers sat and talked as they scraped ‘refried beans’ out of a thin metal can.
“How are we supposed to ensure the professor’s safety?” The Tank asked. “My protection against miasma is a temporary patch. As soon as I’m gone she’s dead. Not to mention, keeping four people protected is draining my Charge four times faster.”
“I don’t know. Maybe we can move her to another one of their ‘bunkers’. Will said. “One that hasn’t been cracked open like an egg.”
Maybe I’ll be able to see the miasma beam from a distance.
Will set aside his beans and stood, heading for the door.
“Where you going?” the tank grunted, scooping up more beans.
“I’m a scout. I’m going scouting.” Will called over his shoulder as he walked.
He opened the door leading into the hallway beyond the room they had set up camp in…
Will blinked as he spotted himself reflected a thousand times, as though he were standing between two mirrors.
Will closed the door.
“We might be in some deep shit.” Will mused.
…Deep shit. A single alien thought reverberated through his mind.
In the blink of an eye Will turned and snatched up the professor and the Tank powering her miasma resistance and sprinted through the window.
I’ll fly these two out right here and now. In his mind he saw himself streaking across the sky with two passengers in tow until he could get her somewhere safe.
In a spray of shattered glass, Will, the professor, and the Tank life-support tumbled back into the exact same room they’d just dove out of.
Okay. Looks like we’re not getting out of here.
“What the hell was THAT!?” Lauren demanded, pushing Will away from her.
Will leaned close to the window and peered at it.
The miasma blocked most of his sight, but about an inch past the window, he spotted…
Scales?
Like someone had taken a comb and dragged the tips through the fabric of the world, creating a dizzying, looping pattern that seemed to move and breath.
What are you? Will wondered.
What are you? The alien thought seemed to reverberate through Will’s skull, echoing itself and every thought he had. Sometimes they replied before he even had a thought.
I’m William Oh.
I’m William Oh.
No, YOU’RE William Oh.
No, I’M William Oh.
Will’s eyes rolled back in his head as the strange voice began repeating, looping back on itself over and over until the loops themselves became a high-pitched squeal that caused Will’s brain to go white.
And out of that noise…meaning emerged.
You feel familiar, William Oh. It garnered my interest.
Shit, it was following me, not Lauren. Will thought as he writhed in pain on the ground. The miasma around them was rapidly thickening to dangerous levels. In another minute or two it would exceed what the Tank could protect against, and they would fail their Trial.
Who are you? Will thought.
I have no name. I am the end and the beginning. The revolution of all things. Order that breeds chaos and chaos that breeds order. I devour myself forever and remain unsated. I constantly change and yet remain the same. I am a paradox, I am infinity.
Neutralize the miasmatic Host. Protect the Professor. Any means necessary.
That stupid fragment of an idea that Will had earlier was starting to look pretty good right now. There was only one solution that would accomplish both goals and it was the longest long shot Will could possibly conceive of.
All or nothing.
So that girl over there, Will thought, glancing over at where Lauren was coughing violently, doubled over as the miasma of the creature’s direct attention began to leak through the Tank’s protection. She’s pretty cute, am I right? if you keep leaking Miasma everywhere, she’ll die.
…I have no context for that statement. I’ve only recently arrived in this reality, and you were familiar to me: The answer to a question I have not yet asked, an action I have not yet taken, so I sought you out. ‘cute girls’ and ‘Die’ have no bearing on us.
“Oh but they do. Use mine.” Will said.
Use your what?
“Use my context.” Will said, tapping his head. “If you’re so infinitely powerful, you should be able to see through my eyes.”
Will’s entire life flashed before his eyes, and for a moment, he saw himself from the outside, in a deeply troubling sensation that reminded him of all the other Immortal Serpent Spawn that he’d found dead, rifling through their lives as though they had been his own.
Once Will got back to the present moment, it seemed to be splitting into thousands and thousands of shards every second, his vision a kaleidoscope.
I see. She is cute. The godlike entity said musingly as Lauren’s body began growing eyes where they shouldn’t be.
“She’s single you know.” Will said to Ouroboros.
…Really?
Will caught a glimpse of a humanoid form stepping through the broken window before his vision cut off entirely.
**Back in The Tower**
Will sat upright, eyes wide and panting. He was tucked into a nice bed, and he recognized his Caravan tent around him. Anna sat at his bedside with a steaming bowl of soup.
“How was your Class Advancement?” Anna asked, offering him the bowl.
“I…don’t remember.” Will said, accepting it. “I think I did something…big? How long was I out?”
“About a day.” Anna replied.
Tallying Class Advancement Trial Results…
Error code: Attempting to divide result by zero.
…Class advancement Failed Successfully.
“Huh.” Will grunted before rudely unhinging his jaw and gulping down his soup.
I’ll figure out what that means later. For now, he was thirsty.
Comments
Benjamin Walsh
Cool chapter; one issue for me was that nobody connected the dots with Lauren Holdna’s name… even if they don’t, a comment about it being the same as the goddess seems appropriate…
Spencer baird
That was pretty cool!
Spoolofwhool
It kind of sounds like Ouroborous is the source of the missma in the world and the other gods are shaped by him.
Joe Brennan
Class
Kev G
There is likely a William Oh every cycle. If the class advancement scenario is the same each cycle, then it's possible that every time Ouroborous create a new cycle he resets the participants in the scenario. It could be that since god!Holdna originates from a time loop, he's been creating cycles until he hits the one that creates her.
Robert Nolan
Please tell me the asshole, self serving, "for the good of humanity(as long as I make out)" officer is named Colonel Granesh and they have been worshiping to ghost of an entitled jack ass for a thousand years.
Arrogant Dreamer
Should've guessed there was time travel in this series with the Mc a grandson of infinity. I hope it doesn't get too squirrelly
Stanisław Drewienkowski
Verry Ouroborosesque, making your own conception possible by intervining. The snake bit its tail, what is past, what is future? I wonder if all heroes of the coils-end shaped tower to such degree during their class advancment, or is it just a William Oh thing, the starter and ender of cycles. Honestly I tought Holdnas many ryes would be less literal and more of: she is profficient with cameras, as if she had eyes everywhere. Hope she likes having tons of eyes, miasma sure didn’t ask.
Redc05
Does anyone know when the next chapter will drop?
The Human
Let's not forget chapter 43: William oh once had a staring contest with Holdna. His gaze was so smoldering that the Thousand Eye Goddess was forced to blink.
Mrfacemanlol
Marty McFly
Jeff Wells
This is basically the opposite of exposition. It's all show, no tell. But this is a great example of how to get deep low into a story without resorting to an exposition info dump.
Fiddle
This was really cool exposition (is that the right word? Probably) 10/10 chapter
Notcreepycreeper
They aren't her babies tho. They're the babies of illusionary copies of oroburos
Kurt A
So clearly Perry was actually an Eldritch God taking a vacation. “I am a paradox.”
Arnon Parenti
Other Oroborus' children aren't dead, they are just invited to the family cookout. I don't think Holdna is going to like hearing Granesh was wholesale butchering her babies for relic dust.
McIntosh Ewell
Ah, I see. Will's his own grandpa's wingman😅 But onto more critical news... PARADOX, you say?
Patron1kj6tz
"William Oh taught Ouroboros the meaning of death." -Some crazy guy who insists he can remember his class advancement but other than this only replies with "can't say"
Michael
This is a registered Perry Z moment
StrollingEye
Yeah, I thought that was very clever. Two thumbs up from me.
StrollingEye
Wasn't that Holdena?
Aloysius
So there were four normal humans there... any chance that they are all the gods? Probably not but you never know.
Prinny Knight
“The godlike entity said musingly as Lauren’s body began growing eyes where they shouldn’t be.” wasn’t there another female god with a bunch of extra eyes?
Kris Piskorski
That was one of the funniest chapters so far
ReadingObsessed
That's awesome
Dee
Will has a big mouth for a big appetite. I do really enjoy what a silly hyperbole the man has become. 😂
Brian Small
Half way through the chapter, I’m sure the alternative title was, ‘Can’t say.’
Alex F
lmao Back to the Future type shit
Imp
Isn't Ander the money God, that Steve the Charltan priest worshipped
Flounder
Don’t forget Dr. A, whom I assume is Andover
Brian Small
I now need to go back and reread Will’s interactions with Braxton
Moon Winchester
Welcome to the top floor of the tower
Trey
really cute seeing all these tier 50s just vibing w each other and enjoying the trial.
Matt
"I'm my own grandpa"
Macronomicon
off the top of my head... Granesh, Andover, Lumesh, Ouroboros, Holdna, And one other mentioned in a bit I added recently in book 1. started with an A.
Joe ?
Wingmanned himself into existence. Wingmanned the circumstances of his ability to wingman. Will is a self contained temporal loop of wingmanning. A wingman that creates itself. Holdna needed a good man so badly that the universe manifested a divine matchmaker for her.
Fleisch
I don’t think so. He gave it away because he thought he might be out for a few days.
Xeophyn
Can someone remind me of the god's names? I only remember Holdna and Granesh.
Brian Small
Sooo…..he set up his own grand parents? McFly?
Max Lopo
Soooooo. Will crested a god. And the tower. By hooking said scientist-soontobegod up with his grandaddy. Basically ensuring his own existence by pimping hard. Oruborus indeed.
Nùmenor
Holdna and her four friends, plus Ouroboros. Huh, so those are our six gods.
God
Bro really is the ultimate wingman
Baines
tis but a dream
Karim Saadi
Now I get it from the other comment's, I'm a bit thick I guess
Karim Saadi
Oooooh no I get it
SirReality
This was quite satisfying. Thank you. Any readers remember if Dr. A could be a different god? I can't remember one that starts with an A off the top of my head.
The Arcane Emperor
Grandparents
Aceluke
Did… did he set up his own ancestor’s parents? What the system
Andrew
Thank you!
Nyroe
William Oh saved humanity by helping his grandpa learn how to score. I wonder how their relationship worked out, beyond them having kids. I guess Will will have to ask Daddy Oh himself when he gets to floor 50.
copperspike
this was great
Not_You
That’s so rad, what a fun chapter
Joshua Little
Thanks for the chapter.
Eli Loeb
Bootstrap paradox it is!
Ryan Naquin
Hot
Emily Gurnavage
That was pretty neat. Holdna *actually* trying to kill herself there was wild. I was really expecting Will to somehow keep his memories but be unable to tell anyone about them though. Slightly sad he doesn't have this new context anymore.
Emily Gurnavage
Yes, Holdna is one of the Gods - but more than that, she is the Goddess that personally intervened earlier in the story on Will's behalf. She helped set things up for his Set. And she is also distantly related to him.
Farxzay
Pulled a Back to the Future
Ethan Barrow
TFTC!! In a way Will gets his taste in women from himself, also hot.
Karim Saadi
Holy shit that was awesome. Not sure what exactly happened there in the end. The gods like oroborus where very powerful miasmic beings before the tower ... And he gave him a lot of information from the future? I can see how that helped but not how it's a paradoxical solution that warrants that error message? Like it was funny but I don't think I get it
Aloysius
Hopefully Will does retain something from that last minute perspective change. Would help a lot for his eyes...
Ranger Science
Okay, now for real thoughts…. I feel reasonable in assuming all that is “real”, for some definition of real, because why fake it? And why fake it with so many details from such a vastly different context? Holdna’s comments would imply Miasma is new to the world, or Miasma in this intensity / severity is new to the world…
Ranger Science
lol for real.
vVip3rzzz
So ummmmmm so is Perry ouroboros??? Is that what we doing here?
Macronomicon
bullets have existed as long as slings have existed, i believe. Will take a look at the other stuff. this was a long chapter, written quickly because it amused me.
Munirah Hutchinson
Woooooooow, that's wild af. It's his parents basically
Jake
Welp that was a canonical event
Josiah
Yeah I gotta say the synthetic body was super obvious after he gave away all of his gear. This just seems so forced and out of character given he didn't know any of that would happen. Just put in the last chapter Bakton telling him he can't use any gear. Feels like a plot hole.
Frank
So wills grandma become interested in his grandfather due to having n a crush on him. Also, this is definitely starting to feel like industrial strength magic is crossing over.
Gardor
"The warrior nodded and pointed to his left hand." -> could you mention his hand before this moment, because i was sorta wondering about it the whole time. "Which hand did he backhand the guy with?" "Did he use his hands to pry open the elevator doors?" "Thumbs up with which hand?". Just when hes taking stock of himself, noticing whether or not he has his non-system hand seems important. "pointing those weird bullet-shooters at the door,”" -> so theyve lost/forgotten the word "gun", but maintained the word "bullet"? I think bullets are definitionally "something fired from a gun", so i wonder about the etymology. "Will grunted before rudely unhinging his jaw and gulping down his soup." -> if this is metaphorical/idiomatic in nature, its quite the cruel tease. Also, im not quite sure why the word "married" would make Will think...anything. He heard that she was single, and immediately jumped to "i gotta set up a time paradox about my grandpa banging her."? He had some sort of bad idea once he heard she wasnt married, and then immediately committed to it to play wingman to Ouroboros as soon as it showed up? Why was this the plan? Hearing her last name seems like a better place to get his fuckery antenna wiggling, than just hearing that shes single. Or at least, drop some context for "Will thinks this is the goddess "married" to Ouroboros, and if shes not married..." Tyftc
Crow's Nest
Assuming I'm not wrong wasn't holdna one of the gods, I'm assuming whatever was going on in the past created the gods who took inspiration from what they saw to create the tower system thus creating a stable loop.
Newt Boot
Dude just set up his god grandpa with god grandma
Julkur
Midway through I thought that it's unusually long. Nice!
RedInkQuill
Will runs the fated date meetcute by sharing his perspective with infinity.
Davan Krueger
Wait no holy shit
austin kutz
Did he just arrange his ancestors hookup?
Aaron Greene
LMFAO! William Oh is such a good wingman he convinced his own great God-father to start his family line.
Bunny Waffles
So Will set up his Great-to-the-power-of-infinity Grand Sire up with his Goddess girlfriend/wife back before she became a god via Tower fuckery time-travel.
Ford-Thomas Frank Loveland
Dear God, he just helped his ancestors hook up before he headed Back To the Future
JTP
Nice
SuperNewbie
Oh PPE
SuperNewbie
“Pee pee ee for that level of miasma doesn’t exist.” ???
Macronomicon
This started as a fun gag, but it took 6k words to set up, and I didn't want to stretch it out for multiple chapters and derail the plot. Anyway, we'll do class advancement friday and back to the plot!
Doggo
i got gmail notification before patron patreon slacking off smh
