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HH 4 - Are you Stupid?
🕑 Added 2025-06-12 11:06:38 +0000 UTCCastor focused on the attributes under [Handyman], and a new window appeared with a list and description of each. There were eight attributes, and [Handyman] would grant Castor +1 to each every Level, for a total of eight points per level. That made it the worst of the three offered classes by far, but that was the only real problem Castor had with the class.
It wasn’t even much of a problem, since he didn’t care about becoming some kind of unstoppable powerhouse. The only reason it mattered was because it would put Castor in a worse position when facing the [Hero]. Curious, he looked over the list of attributes and read their descriptions. Most of them were self-explanatory, but also came with some useful numerical information.
Strength
+1 to all Strength checks and attacks
+100 lbs of lift capacity
+1 Armor Capacity
Agility
+1 to all Agility checks and attacks
+1 Dodge
Speed
+1 to all Speed checks
+1 Movement speed
+1 Dodge
+1 Physical Defense
Fortitude
+1 to all Fortitude checks
+20 Health
+10 Stamina
+1 Health and Stamina regeneration per hour
+1 Dimensional Defense
Intelligence
+1 to all Intelligence checks and attacks
Wisdom
+1 to all Wisdom checks
+10 Mana
+1 Mana Regeneration per hour
+1 Spiritual Defense
Charisma
+1 to all Charisma checks and attacks
Luck
+1 to all Luck checks
+1 Critical Strike
+1 Divine Defense
+1 Blessings Capacity
Some of the attributes had more effects than others, and Castor quickly found that he could access an index with more basic information about each.
Strength and Agility were the two offensive body attributes. They governed martial skills and general coordination. Intelligence and Charisma were the two offensive mental attributes. They were responsible for spell casting, and also played an outsized role in Intrinsic Skills. The main benefit of these four was attack, competency, and skill synergy.
Wisdom, Speed, Fortitude, and to a lesser degree Luck, were all defensive attributes, which is why they had the most effects listed. They were also involved in Intrinsic Skills, but were less important for Intrinsics overall. The main benefit of these four was raw survivability from having more resources, higher defenses, faster movement, and better perception.
Luck was a slight outlier. The description told Castor that it was a measure of the conductivity of the soul in relation to the Universal Will, whatever that was. It sounded like it would make it easier for gods to fuck around in Castor’s life, which he was ambivalent about.
Castor felt his poor judgment as a teenager had led to an outsized degree of punishment with the resulting millenia of enslavement, but he wasn’t angry at the gods. They hadn’t made him summon a demon to gain immortality, but they also hadn’t ever done anything to help him out. He didn’t really give a shit about them one way or another.
Looking at the three classes with more information, he noted that while the [Demonic Berserker] had its highest bonus in an offensive attribute, Strength, the rest of its bonuses were to defensive attributes. It would be fast, hard hitting, and hard to kill. It would also have low coordination in both physical and social situations. He still didn’t like it.
[Underlord] was more geared towards offense, with big bonuses to Strength and Charisma. That would make it a sort of mind-affecting spellblade. Its defenses weren’t as good as the [Demonic Berserker], but it made up for that by having more total attributes. It wasn’t quite a glass cannon, but without any Agility or Speed, it would suffer on the front line.
[Handyman] was, objectively, worse than both. It had less total points to offense than either of the other two, and less total points to defense as well. The only saving grace was that it gave a point to Luck and Agility, whereas the others did not, but even that was cold comfort.
Castor found that he didn’t really care. He had no desire to be a relentless barbarian or a scheming mind controller. As far as he was concerned, he’d been a [Handyman] for the vast majority of his very, very long life. For nearly two thousand years all he’d done was maintain Lord Bythrax’s castle domain and perform odd jobs for all the demons within.
Could a [Handyman] fight a [Hero]? There was no way. Could Castor fight the [Hero] as a [Demonic Berserker] or an [Underlord]? He found that equally unlikely, given the Level difference. Castor figured his best bet would be to show up with the most harmless class he had access to and then throw himself on the [Hero]’s mercy. And if he survived, he’d want it to be with a class he was comfortable with.
He also couldn’t wait to see how pissed off Gully would be.
Castor selected [Handyman], and when the world unfroze, he was laughing before he even saw Gully’s shocked expression.
Gul’thraxis immediately used Identify on the cackling human and his jaw came unhinged. Steam began to curl up from the Wrath Demon’s nostrils, but when he spoke, Castor didn’t hear a word of it. He was distracted by a flood of notifications.
You have become a Level 1 [Handyman]!
+1 to all stats
You gain the Active Skill: Adhesive!
Adhesive
Action
5 Mana
Physical
Coat the surface of an object you can touch with a powerful adhesive. The strength of the adhesive and the coverage area are inversely proportional and controllable at will.
Maximum adhesive strength: 51 (Intelligence plus Physical, divided by two)
Maximum coverage: 10,404 square inches (Intelligence plus Physical, squared)
You gain the Passive Skill: Industrial Transmutation!
Industrial Transmutation
You may convert raw materials into refined materials at a rate of 1 (Level) cubic feet per second. Once set, this effect occurs automatically, so long as you remain within 16 (Total attributes) feet of the chosen materials.
You gain the Intrinsic Skill: Maintenance!
Maintenance
Repair and maintain nearly anything. Higher levels increase the complexity of what can be repaired or maintained. This skill’s governing attribute varies based on its target.
Your diligent repair and maintenance of a wide array of targets has increased your Maintenance skill to Level 100!
This is the maximum Level Maintenance can reach until you complete a Maintenance Feat.
Your Attunement has been identified as Spiritual. You gain the Intrinsic Skill: Spiritual!
Spiritual
Manipulate Spiritual forces to bend the world to your will. As one of the five fundamental schools, Spiritual magicks can be influenced by any attribute, depending on the task.
Your manipulation of Spiritual entities has increased your Spiritual skill to Level 100!
This is the maximum Level Spiritual can reach until you complete a Spiritual Feat.
You currently have 2 Intrinsic Skills out of a maximum of 10. Your past activities have granted you access to additional Intrinsic Skills. You may select these skills at any time. Additional Intrinsic Skill slots can be obtained by completing a Skill Feat.
You have completed a new Feat!
Demonic Immortality
You have bargained with sinister forces to obtain Demonic Immortality. The following effects have been identified:
Your health pool is doubled.
All of your organs have become redundant. Only damage to your mana core can be lethal.
So long as you are not reduced to 0 HP, you can regenerate from any injury, no matter how severe. While deprivation of food, water, air, and sleep will no longer kill you, you cannot regenerate without rest and sustenance.
You do not age.
You are immune to all mundane disease, illness, and defects.
You cannot produce offspring.
You have completed a new Feat!
Class advancement
With diligence matched by few others, you have pursued your class as a profession for 10 years. [Handyman] is upgraded to [Pro Handyman]. Please choose two attributes to further improve each Level. This selection will be retroactively applied to all previous Levels.
Castor carefully read through each of the notifications, blinking them away once he felt he understood them. He paused for a few seconds to make sure no more were coming, then tuned back in to what Gully was saying.
“–you fucking stupid?!” he shouted. Castor took a breath and fixed Gully with a stare.
“What was that?” he asked.
“I said, are you fucking stupid?!” The demon slammed their hands onto the table and half stood from their chair. “[Handyman]?! How the fuck is being a [Handyman] going to help you kill a [Hero]?!”
“Calm down,” Castor said, knowing full well that such a statement would not encourage Gully to calm down. “It was the best choice for me.”
“Really?!” said Gully, his talons digging into the surface of the expensive table. “It was the best choice?! For you?!”
The demon stood all the way up, eyes narrowing as he shook wood chips from the ends of his claws.
“What about the best choice for me, Castor?” he hissed. “Was your entire goal to waste my time? I spent all day looking for you, took you under my wing, dropped a rare fucking class in your lap, and you pick mother fucking [Handyman]?! Should I lay down on the floor so you can take a shit in my mouth, too?!”
Castor watched Gully seethe for a moment, judging that any answer to that rhetorical would be the wrong one.
“May I ask a question?” said Castor.
“Sure. I’ll rip your head off if it’s a stupid one.” Gully flexed his hands, and Castor knew he was an inch away from dismemberment. He had no idea how the [Hero]’s ability would react to Castor being murdered by a fellow minion, but Gully didn’t seem like he was thinking about consequences at the moment.
“Is Level 100 high for an intrinsic skill?”
Gully continued to flex his hands, seeming to try and judge whether this was a decapitationable inquiry.
“Yeah, that’s pretty good,” he said, his tone cooling off. “That’s the first cap. Why?”
“Both of my Intrinsic Skills started at Level 100.”
Gully shook his head like a startled cat. “That’s not a thing,” he said. “That doesn’t happen.”
Castor willed his skill list back up, then focused on sharing it with the demon. Gully’s eyes went wide as he looked them over.
“Fuck,” he said. “That’s… fuck. Have you picked your specializations?”
Castor furrowed his brow and looked back down at the list. Each skill had a plus symbol next to it. He mentally selected it, and a skill tree popped open. Both of his skills had 5 specialization points to spend.
“I guess not,” he said. “But how good is Level 100 on a grander scale. Give me some context.”
Gully slowly sat back down into his chair, still staring at the skill list. “The rule of thumb is that you want your main skills to match your class Level. If you’re Level 100 in your class, you want your main intrinsics to be at least Level 100 as well.”
“Okay,” said Castor. “Then I’m ahead of the pack for my Level.”
“Ahead of the pack?” said Gully, voice rising at the end. “You’ve gone around the planet and bit the pack on the ass.”
“Good to know.”
Castor studied his screens, trying to decide how much to tell the demon. He needed Gully on his side for now, but he didn’t want the demon knowing all his strengths and weaknesses, no matter how helpful he was pretending to be.
“Think that’s enough to beat a Level 20 [Hero]?”
Gully sat back, letting his arms flop down onto the arm rests. “I dunno man. [Hero]s are better than most unique classes. They get 16 attributes per Level at minimum, and their skills grow twice as fast.” The demon closed their eyes and did some math.
“A Level 20 [Hero] probably gets plus five or six to their main attribute,” he said. “Level 20 would give him a main attribute of 101 to 121. Assuming his primary combat Intrinsic is 40, we can add those together for an attack rating of 141 to 161. Compare that to your Spiritual skill of 100 and add whatever your Charisma or Intelligence is.”
“I’m still short,” said Castor.
“Infernal balls, man, but you’re way closer than I thought you’d be.” Gully’s smile returned. “Fuck, this means you have a chance. Not some bullshit, ‘go get ‘im’ type of chance, but a real one!” He tapped his claws on his muzzle. “I should go place a bigger bet.”
Seeing that Gully was happy with the situation, Castor relaxed a little. “When do we have to leave?” he asked.
“Huh?” said Gully. “Oh, as soon as possible. Lord Bythraxomonius cursed me so that if I intentionally delay, I’ll get organ failure.”
“Do I have time to spend these spec points?”
“Yeah,” said Gully. “Yeah, I think that should be fine. Just don’t drag your feet about it, and I can’t give you too much more guidance without things getting risky.”
Castor nodded and returned to his menus. He didn’t immediately open his skills, instead choosing to look at his advancement Feat.
He could choose two stats to improve by an additional one each Level. His Adhesive skill operated on Intelligence, while his other abilities could benefit from anything. His Demonic Immortality doubled his health pool, which meant Fortitude was more valuable per point as well.
He was tempted by Intelligence, but Castor had always been more physically inclined. While he used his head to come up with solutions, he used his body to deploy them. Gully had mentioned that the [Hero] trained under a [Sword Saint], which meant they were probably a swordsman of some kind. Intelligence wouldn’t stop a blade, but armor or raw Speed might help. He decided to go for Strength and Fortitude, if for no reason other than to defend himself.
Once that was done, he immediately got another notification.
You have completed a new Feat!
Class advancement
Your diligence is nearly unparalleled and you have pursued your class as a profession for 25 years. [Pro Handyman] is upgraded to [Expert Handyman]. Please choose three attributes to further improve each Level. This selection will be retroactively applied to all previous Levels.
Castor bit his lip to hide a grin. He added the bonuses to Speed, Agility, and Fortitude. Being a [Handyman] was a physically demanding job, after all. He wanted to be prepared. Unsurprisingly, he was met with another notification.
You have completed a new Feat!
Class advancement
Diligence is your middle name! You have pursued your class as a profession for 50 years. [Expert Handyman] is upgraded to [Master Handyman]. Please choose four attributes to further improve each Level. This selection will be retroactively applied to all previous Levels.
Castor placed the bonuses, and couldn’t hide his smile any longer as the notifications kept coming.
You have pursued your class as a profession for 100 years. [Master Handyman] is upgraded to [Legendary Handyman]. Please choose five attributes to further improve each Level.
You have pursued your class as a profession for 250 years. [Legendary Handyman] is upgraded to [Sagacious Handyman]. Please choose six attributes to further improve each Level.
You have pursued your class as a profession for 500 years. [Sagacious Handyman] is upgraded to [Ancient Handyman]. Please choose seven attributes to further improve each Level.
You have pursued your class as a profession for 1,000 years. [Ancient Handyman] is upgraded to [Immortal Handyman]. All attributes will be improved by 1 each Level.
You have pursued your class as a profession for 2,000 years. [Immortal Handyman] is upgraded to [Eternal Handyman]. All attributes will be improved by 2 each Level.
Comments
Quyan640
Better place a bet before that fight
Critical Meyhem
Ok I was not sure what this was at first, but the more of it I read, the more I like it.
