Gatobob
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Saturday Update!
🕑 Added 2026-01-24 15:29:31 +0000 UTCI'm afraid I have to report another pretty weak work week. I unfortunately am still sick 😩
I started being able to sleep again on Tuesday, and since I hadnt slept for 3-4 days I basically spent the next 36 hours sleeping or fighting sleep. Wednesday was the first day I could walk around and do stuff, but I needed to catch up on chores, cleaning, and cooking really bad so all my energy went to that. On Thursday I thought I was well enough to write again, but I kept feeling 'floaty' and had bad brain fog. I didn't feel like I was getting enough oxygen even though my airways were finally clear. I did write a tiny bit though. Then yesterday I had to do my usual 20 min post box walk in -30C and that apparently completely fucked up my lungs again [ I have screwed up lungs to begin with from medical history unfortunately ] so I had to take a break AGAIN before getting another little bit of writing done.
I've been told on my last post not to apologize for being sick, and I agree that it would be setting a bad example for other artists, so I'll just say my feelings instead of a reflexive apology:
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I'm very frustrated with my lack of progress recently, and it bothers me a lot to be falling behind in my schedule/plans.
I know that I still attach too much of my self worth to my productivity, but it doesn't stop the emotions. It's hard for me to show up to a Saturday update with so little.
I'm also frustrated that I'm still sick. I can't believe it's lasting this long, and I'm tired of feeling this way. It feels unfair, like I am being consciously maligned somehow, despite how obviously illogical that is.
I'm frustrated about what I'm seeing in the news. It's sickening, and all the lies and gaslighting are reopening old wounds in me. I find myself feeling bitter about things that happened a long time ago. I know this is just transference from being unable to process my fear in this moment, yet it keeps happening. It embarrasses me.
My body, my mind, and even my sense of identity are fragile right now. I feel weak and ashamed.
All of this spills over into my work and makes me second guess everything. I worry constantly about my writing quality. After writing nearly 40 death scenes in the YKMET series, I worry about being repetitive and unoriginal. I worry that I'm bringing the 'same old thing' to the table, when I want so badly for this script to be good.
What if I am spending so much extra time writing this script and it turns out to be bad anyway? Rational or not, the fear haunts me.
All this is to say... these are my feelings. This is what's going on in my head.
It's a lot, but thankfully the solution is simple. All I have to do is show up on Monday and keep trying. My health is still improving and I know I will be fully healthy again eventually.
Whether or not my work is bad is actually irrelevant. I know I'm doing my best, and if it isn't good work then it isn't. I already know I'd rather suffer the consequences of underwhelming work than giving up. I will not give up.
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I did technically write out two floating endings, but I want to be honest here and say that they're really quite short, and there is actually an argument that they are 'the same ending'. I had to think hard about whether they should be counted as one or two in the endings list, and barely settled on 'two'. The experience of playing them will be significantly different so I figured that should be the deciding factor.
I still have three floating endings left to write, but the main serious work I need to do is invisible on this graphic- which is the major editing pass that will involve a lot of new writing for alternate scenarios. There is still a significant amount of script work to be done.
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I'll try to find some nice Willow stuff to lift the spirits of this post a bit.
I like this one because it looks like a school portrait 😂
I also found two videos, attached. [ A note about threepeeemm.mov - she has dry food all the time, she was not starving! she just wants her wet food dinner ]
Anyway, I'm running out of time, so I'll cut it off here. I'm getting better so I think my next update will have more progress at least.
Keep fighting, stay safe. See you next week!
Comments
Nasa
The way Willow’s back twitched in the threpeeem video made her fur look and behave like silk almost omg! Anyway I feel like most of us are sick in one shape or the other and as we people from Nordic countries know - winter makes u sleepy all the time 😭 I feel like im at 1 hp until spring/summer comes, so I wouldn’t beat myself if I were you! Also from your track record, pretty much everything you’ve put out is peak so I highly doubt this will be any different! Its just the anxiety getting to ya and i know how it is but I applaud you for not giving up when it feels hopeless (its really not!) 🩷🩷
Gatobob
No canon birthdays for my chars, but I support the public making fanon ones!
SammRacoon
Don't over work Gato! It's not bad taking a few breaks, we're excited about the upcoming visual novel but it's important to take care of yourself! I hope you get well, I discovered your art recently on December but i already admire you for you hard work! :D (Btw I'm curious...does Strade has a Canon birthday? I heard is on June 26)
Gatobob
🥺
naya jamess.ua
Gato, I am very sorry that you are going through this, and I understand :( I want you to feel better and not blame yourself for this! You are the best! Please take care of yourself, I am sure people are patient and we all have our own things to do. I love your work! Your game novels are incredible! Please stay safe and take care of yourself, even though I'm repeating myself. We are looking forward to the new game about Lawrence! You are original and your progress in both drawing and gaming is incredible! I understand how it is to remember the old things that prevent you from doing something new. As your fan, I adore you! You inspire me not to give up what I love and have been doing for years. Sending you the strongest hugs, may everything be well with you :( Take care of yourself!(Sorry my English so bad i use the translator 😔)
Sky Kitsune
I hope you feel better soon :( At least kitty is there to watch over you
CatHungryForTaco
So sad to hear about the persistant sickness! Hope you get better soon. :D
Gatobob
Sorry, but they don't ^^; I am pretty good at imagining images, but I'm very very bad at imagining voices. My brain just doesn't work well that way 😂
Dnaabili
Hi Gatobob, hope you're feeling much better than yesterday and recover soon! My Pookie and I were wondering if your characters (Strade, Ren, and Lawrence) have canon voices? Something like: Strade is voiced by X character or person, of course, if it's possible to know. ¡Thanks! (˶˃𐃷˂˶)
m0rtisss
Get better soon, Gato! I want to tell you that I really enjoy your writing and I'm sure a lot of people do. I feel like every scene will be different anyway, because you're creating it after some years have passed since BTD 2 came out. Sending you all support! <3
Lolhopetch
Any progress is good progress! Dont feel frustrated with yourself for not progressing like you'd want to or feel you should, that's just gonna make you feel worse and more overwhelmed :(( take things easy you're not on a time crunch!! People shouldn't feel entitled to having ykmet law sooner just because you have more things sorted out simplet than ykmet strade :( Keeping a steady work balance is only possible if you're happy and healthy! Ofc if youre sick now youre not gonna feel too well to work more 😔😔😔 With time comes quality! Good work this week and good luck! Keep your head up youre doing great :DD
Moonfireflight
That is such a great picture of Willow! I love the lighting
Gatobob
People are free to headcanon whatever they like but I won’t be assigning anything myself. I can say that Farz’s last name actually came from a comment on deviantart a long time ago when I was originally posting the comic. The commenter joked that his last name should be ‘Murphy’ for Murphy’s law: ‘whatever can go wrong, will go wrong’. I thought it funny and apt enough to make it his actual last name
Basil
Hi gato!! i think u mentioned before that farz doesnt have a canon nationality but if u where to give him one what would it be? i headcannon him as irish (murphy being an irish surname :3)
Ellie
Your work progress is good! Just one thing is more than enough of progress to have now lmao. Also def should call Willow on the credits assistant moral booster lmao. And include a little photo of her, it'll be fun. <3
