exurb1r
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I am once again assuring you I'm alive
🕑 Added 2020-12-03 17:58:57 +0000 UTCHeyo puffins,
This isn’t a preemptive request to charge you or anything like that, just thought I’d check in.
So. Firstly, sorry I haven’t posted on here a while. I don’t have much of an excuse beyond going into a bit of a hole really. I’ll just get the depressing shit out of the way first.
The blues got me fairly good for a time, that’s the bones of it. (Hardly a unique experience in 2020, I won’t labour the point.) I’m fine, just somewhat fell into writing fatigue, if that’s a thing. I have some new Catastrotivity scripts in the works (if you know what I’m going on about), but uploading rants along the lines of hEy GuYs HeReS hOw YoU dEaL wItH wRiTeRs BlOcK, while simultaneously being burned out seems fairly fucking hypocritical. All’s well in any case, I'll resume the series shortly.
The new book is done, the draft anyway, but little did I know that was just the beginning of the fun. Lots of plot points make no sense, lots of stuff still needs to be tidied. I was hoping to get it out for Christmas, and developed a regime of covering my living room in notes and sleeping on the sofa so I didn’t have anything else around as distraction. A friend noticed this approach while visiting and suggested I might be losing my mind, and maybe should stop forcing the thing. I agreed.
It’s done, it’s just not polished yet, and I’d like it to be as close to what it’s supposed to be as possible. It will make it to the outside world soon, promise.
Cool, that’s the depresso-espresso over. Onto the jokey jokes.
Well. I was lucky enough to contract the you-know-what flu last month, even after being relatively careful. It was a 3.6 roentgen experience, not great, not terrible. Really I got insanely lucky – the peak was basically a few weeks of moderate flu; lots of sitting around trying not to google signs of pneumonia, etc. The upside of living alone and losing your sense of smell is not having to shower for 5 days. The downside of not showering for 5 days is you sure as hell notice when your sense of smell comes back.
In all seriousness, this seems to be a very mixed bag with how symptoms turn out. I know several folks who have been asymptomatic, and several others who have had a really, really horrible time with it. It won’t be that surprising if we find out in a few years that there was a strong genetic component to all this.
Still. I finally tested negative a few days back and going outside was just…I’ve never had such a deep appreciation for pavements, and trees, and dumpsters even. Outside is great, I really can’t recommend it enough after 3 weeks indoors . Staying inside is a fun luxury when it’s on your own terms, I’ve always found. With quarantine though you start having thoughts like, “I really should go and buy more milk….and potentially risk killing my neighbours. Yeah, maybe just black coffee today, huh.”
It was a very strange experience catching something that had been so psychologically ‘distant’ just a few months ago, localised mostly to China, then spreading across Europe, then perhaps a few acquaintances, then suddenly it’s right there in your own biology. You start developing a kind of weird hyper-sensitivity to every tiny thing your body does. WHY ARE MY EYES A BIT LEAKY TODAY? IS THAT A SIGN THIS IS GETTING WORSE? DOES BLUE USUALLY LOOK THAT INTENSE? I SHOULD PHONE THE SURGEON GENERAL AT ONCE, etc etc.
I’m not trying to scare you, or to diminish the thing either. I had a middle-of-the-road experience and contracted it even after taking almost every precaution I could. Please, please, please just be careful is all I’m saying. If you’re going through it currently, I hope you’re keeping in good spirits, and you have someone to kindly go and fetch stuff from the outside world. I’m sure you’re going to be absolutely fine, and lots of early festive wishes to you.
I will bet my cat that we’re now at the beginning of the end with this thing. Not only are vaccines getting rolled out, but at least two of them seem to be remarkably effective. The fact that researchers even managed this so quickly is a testament to how, when we have to, we can get our arses in gear and actually come together on world-changing, world-saving projects. I hope we don’t forget we have the potential for that when needed. All I’m saying is: we might be about to turn a corner with this one, and 2021 may begin to look like normality again thanks to very, very clever men and women. It’ll take a little while, but we will recover.
Anyhoo. As always I have a few gaming and whatever else suggestions that I think you might like, especially with having had 3 weeks of sitting around in my pajamas.
The first won’t be new to you, but: Fallout New Vegas. I played it a bit back in the day, but for some reason wasn’t drawn in. This time around it’s kept me up until sunrise on several occasions. Just all the warring factions, the powerplay inside the factions; the wasteland feels genuinely alive, and your decisions actually have serious consequences. If you haven’t played any of the recent Fallout games, this is the place to start in my humble opinion. You really won’t regret it. (It’s also quite modestly priced on Steam at the moment.)
The second is a highly addictive game called Noita. I won’t spoil it, but you play as a pixelated wizard, raiding the land and picking up various powerful wands to end baddies with. Every single pixel on the screen is subject to your wrath, you can blow just about anything up. It’s absolutely fantastic and hard as shit. I still haven’t beaten it, even with quarantine time.
The third, again, won’t be news to you but: The Queen’s Gambit, a show on Netflix about a chess genius. The main actress (actor?) is brilliant, Anya Taylor-Joy. Alcohol, debauchery, and chess. What’s not to love about this one.
Finally, this is a bit specific, but maybe you know of Louis Theroux. He’s a documentary filmmaker from the UK, usually covering cults or just out there people. I’ve been a huge fan of his for years. I can’t recommend his book Gotta Get Theroux This enough, it’s fantastic – chronicling how he rose from a slightly nerdy graduate, to a living legend. (That’s my appraisal of him, not his.) The audiobook is absolutely great, and got me through the more unpleasant days of covid. I hope you dig it too.
Anyway. I hope you liked today’s video. These days they seem to take about a month to make and the process was driving me nuts. This one was just under two weeks from idea to finish; I think I’ll go back to that kind of shorter format. I have a little Christmas video plan I also hope you enjoy, if I can make the script work. Then I’ll do my damndest to return to something resembling a regular upload schedule. Promise.
As ever, thank you so, so much for sticking by me on here, apologies if I've been tardy with replying to messages; I'll spend tomorrow (post-upload day is always a treat) going through anything I missed, and getting back to you. I hope you’re doing well, and keeping in a good place.
Big love as ever, and speak soon,
Ex.
(P.S. Did you think I would forget the obligatory feline photos? She has been the goodest of cats of late, keeping me amply company. Please find evidence of such attached.)
Comments
Eli Valtus
any news for the new book?
thisisaname42
he's writing his book
ryan
Just never stop making stuff man, it's helped more people, and helped people more, than you can ever know. Particularly videos like "You Will Never Do Anything Remarkable" and "We're the Last Humans Left" and the Catastrotivity series, has done so much for me and my outlook and everything, so thank you from the depths of my soul.
Tom Sweetman
Hi exurb1a, I know we are strangers but as a fellow human I wanted to say thanks for all your videos and you sharing you. Hope you receive this in good spirits and you’re doing something that feels your soul with greatness. Anyways all the best
loopuleasa
just add "pay per video" on patreon, and all is good you cannot rush inspiration
Gurumaru
Yeah I'm also afraid of this blog and whether he's gone because of dealing with those allegations stuff either it's all true or not... Just hope he's fine
Ивээл Гансүх
https://www.photoandgrime.com/blog-1/2020/11/25/pieke-roelofs/youtuber-exurb1a-exposed-sickening-truth-about-an-abuser My entire reality has shaken.
Jason Hawken
Probably beating himself up over not 'contenting', which is dumb cos we love him and he's probably got shit to do.
Logan Eads
He must be on vacation. He deserves one.
Joseph Wan
Hey guys, anyone figured out what had happened to our beloved space turtle?
Me AF
Please take good care of yourself and stay safe♥️ good luck
Nyx Nox
I wish I could tell you how many of your videos I've rewatched this past week, they've been of great help to my newfound philosophical quest for meaning and purpose in life. I hope you are well, and if you don't mind, I'll read your books now, as I think they might draw me back into reading regularly again. I'll be keeping you posted, because you sen like the person to like knowing they make a difference
Fernanda Ferrairo
Ex? are you ok? it's been the longest since we've heard from you, I think. hoping all is well.
Logan Eads
Sending good energy and stuffs Ex.
Noël Jenni
Well, I've read his book "The Prince of Milk" lately and now continued reading "The Bridge to Lucy Dunne", some of his short stories. I liked "The Prince of Milk" a lot and would recommend it. He wouldn't recommend it to you himself of course. My opinions on the short stories in "The Bridge to Lucy Dunne" are a little bit mixed. Also, I am quite worried now that he has a load of barbiturates in his bedside drawer. Also, he recommends a few books in his own books.
max
mate u seem like the bloke that would like a game like Factorio and also do u have like a favourite book list somewhere. I'm desperate for some good books to read
Vyse
Don't worry regarding posting things, creativity needs its pause. Also beeing some in some dark time but mate, rewatching your videos gives so much energy. Thanks <3 Btw, do you have a ps4, I still have a code for a game lying around here somewhere. In case you are interested, pm me and it is yours :) All the best mate
Steffen Hildebrand
It's been three months, still alive?
Ashley Naudé
I am bit late here, but I just wanted to say that my cat is called Puffin and it made me insanely happy when you addressed the letter to us as "puffins" 😁😂
Logan Eads
Shut up and take my money X! Best of wishes to you!
Anomalies
So glad to hear from you - take your time - hope everything is going well. Your videos and books always make my day, while giving me a life crisis
Neshploda
Love these update posts c: Keep keepin' on my man
Ian Preston
So glad you are safe! Just happy to see you are moving forward and will happily wait until you’re ready to share. 🤩
Chris Thorough
Your new video was amazing - even got watery eyes. To anyone like me, who didn't get get enough exurb1a and a dose of optimistic nihilism yet: I recommend the podcasts on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0zDa3YV2KVX6HQoLMmmVeE?si=zVQN5TNiRamldC2O-DmKgA Also, to Exurb1a and everyone else here, I strongly recommend the book "Embodiment and the Inner Life" by Murray Shanahan. The author explores how human brains work and where consciousness comes from. It blew my mind - I've read it about 7 months ago and still can't stop thinking about the new concepts presented.
Mateusz Pruszczak
Yes, it was. But please ignore previous messages I was younger and less cultural when I wrote them.
EggCess
Thank you so much for answering and thank you even more for the tip about Spin. It sounds amazing. A little different from my thought back then maybe (haven't read it yet, so not entirely sure), but phenomenally interesting nonetheless, and I'm ordering it right now to read it, after I've finished my current read through of the Three Body Problem series. Please don't feel bad and don't think you owe me anything or have to answer. You really don't. Most of this is supposed to be fun, remember (except taxes or cleaning up after cooking). Have a great evening :)
exurb1a
Hola EggCess. I will go hunting for it immediately, a huge apology for not replying, total dick-move on my side, I try to write back to everything. I'm not sure if it's the same as your idea, but Robert Charles-Wilson wrote a neat book a while ago called Spin about (again, maybe it's not the same) something sounding a little similar, where our physics had been confined to our local space to stop us fucking up surrounding galaxies, if I recall. Again, apologies for not replying timely-ly, will endeavour to do so now, and hope you're doing well.
exurb1a
Hey there Mateusz, it seems to be a totally mixed bag. I know quite a few folks here who were smell-less for a few months before it returning, and others like myself who got it back very quickly. Christ knows how this works. And absolutely, will check my messages - was your name the same on Facebook as on here? A massive thank you in advance.)
exurb1a
You are *squark* most *squark* welcome indeed. (And cheers for sticking around, thank you, thisisaname42. And I do hope that's an homage to Douglas Adams.)
exurb1a
Ey, thank you kindly! No really, that's lovely to hear. This isn't the most inspiring time to write, I'll admit, but I promise more's coming. (Hey, it's ever so cool to have your support, cheers ave_droid.)
exurb1a
1. That is just ridiculously kind, thank you. 2. Welp, yes, I don't know - it was certainly a weird one. But thank you for being so understanding, Joakim. 3. And that is ever so appreciated, cheers. Really.
exurb1a
A massive thank you to you and your lady at all for bothering with it, that's most kind indeed. And right back at you, cheers. PS - it was a cat a friend kindly drew for me months ago, unsure if she was under the influence of LSD, though I've often suspected.
TJ Cerasi
I nearly cried during your new video, and I’m not a crier. Ive recently gotten into the film business and started writing my own scripts to no avail. I admire your works and hope one day I could be nearly as talented as you are. Your words penetrate me (sorry) like nothing else. Thank you for being who you are
Okwss
wassup fam havent heard from you in a while Glad to see your doing fine, same with the felines Been busy with my diploma course & genshin impact. life is well
Fabian Rosdalen
Omg I love Dear Nia 😍 I can't even describe my feeling to it without sounding pretentious, but this is art in a whole new category! The universe is now immensely richer for containing this masterpiece! Thank you! 😍
Shesha
I haven't watched Dear Nia yet, it's sitting in another tab waiting till tonight when the house is quiet. Btw, after being persuaded to take up jogging by a video you posted years ago, it has brought me into contact with a bunch of wonderful people, which kinda hit me this afternoon after spending time with a lovely girl who works at the local Skechers shop xD Thanks man I guess I just assumed you'd be alright even though you'd become an unwilling host, but I really am glad you're okay and negative now! Also it's always a delight to keep up to date on anything you put out on here or youtube (and one day, I look forward to ordering your books), but there's no judgement or impatience if you aren't able to maintain that regular schedule ^_^ To add two more things, alongside reading through Robin Hobb's books I'm currently reading Dexter Dias' book The Ten Types of Human, and I wouldn't be surprised if it'd interest you. Basically he's proposing viewing the brain/mind as a modular thing, with ten aspects developed to respond to ten types of situation. It's fascinating to me, although I haven't finished it. Also at some stage if you're still into hurdy gurdy music, do check out Patty Gurdy's stuff! My favourite is one of her original songs, Gurdy's Green. I know you have much to do and we love piling recommendations on you, so I hope this doesn't create any overwhelming-ness for you! Take care, our space tortoise!
Shesha
What a truly beautiful kitty ^_^
Sairagav .
Catasrtotivity is low-key the BEST thing that happened in my life! (No this does not then imply my life is shit and nothing good happens ever. That is true, but this doesn't imply it) I was quite worried about you and was really looking forward to hearing from you here or in the form of new work. We love you! Keep this fantastic shit up mate. P.S I caught the "thingy" a while back too. Mine was mild but still a bit scary. It's the anticipation and the anxiety that makes it worse. But still some people have it worse than others... P.P.S do you meditate? I'm curious... I wanted to give it a go, so wanted to know if you do it too
RobotWobot
Hello again, you utterly dazzling space tortoise, you. It’s lovely to see you again! ^_^ (The following is written prior to watching Dear Nia) I’m really sorry to hear you caught COVID, but it is wonderful to hear that you’ve made a recovery! (Loved the Chernobyl reference, btw) I’ve been incredibly fortunate myself, and not just in terms of COVID. Everything’s been pretty good lately, and this latest post/video truly is the icing on the cake. Proper, homemade chocolate icing. 😋 (Speaking of food, according to the NHS website, a tablespoon of raisins with cereal is a good source of one of your five-a-day. And good grief, it is a game changer: it is DELICIOUS!) I’ve been back at work over the last couple months. (1-2 days a week), and that’s been alright. Sometimes slow, sometimes busy. I work in a library and we’re doing click and collect, so it varies greatly from day-to-day. Funnily enough, I was mentioning your work to a colleague today, probably hours before this post and the video went live. Speaking of libraries, I’ve been taking a ton of books out and reading a chapter per night. My last book was “The Stars my Destination” (like most of the books I read, it was a book you recommended somewhere.) It was a good book. I wish I was as motivated as he was to get his revenge as I am to my own projects. I’m currently reading “Irresistible”. It’s about addiction, mostly concerning smartphone addiction. I’m a little bit irritated that it spoiled some movies, shows and podcasts (so far the ones I can remember include “The Italian Job”, “The Sopranos”, and “Serial”), but like most books, it is insanely detailed. There’s a lot of good stuff in there, too. Funnily enough, I read this book after Joe Rogan recommended it within his podcast with Miley Cyrus. Which, as it happens, was a podcast you recommended on your last post. (And speaking of recommendations, I’ve added all your new ones to my corresponding lists. 👌) Speaking of books, congratulations on finishing your book! (Inconsistencies and plot-holes etc aside, of course) that must be truly magical... is it still magical to have formed so many congruent words together after all these books? Also I’ve put The Fifth Science on my Secret Santa wish list this year... so fingers crossed! 🤞(I know it’s available free now, but I can’t resist a physical copy. 😁) I wanna talk about Neuralink briefly. I listened to the Elon Musk Joe Rogan podcasts, and Neuralink sounds... AMAZING. If you haven’t seen it yet or heard much about it, I implore you: Please, take a listen. I’ve linked a Google Doc with some thoughts I plan to expand below. If it goes according to plan, Neuralink could completely revolutionise humanity. This is the stuff of science fiction, and it is oh so exciting! https://docs.google.com/document/d/13TL4O9oYGNMf0n7mn2rXwkayvNJNAHxIF3W4N76l7p4/edit Your videos deserve a comfortable viewing, so once I got home from work, I popped it on the TV in my bedroom. I sat there, eating a couple tangerines, watching that wonderful video. (The following was written after watching Dear Nia) I’ve been thinking about what sets you apart from other content creators. I’m still thinking hard on it, but I think it’s that you: 1. Have genuinely fascinating ideologies and videos - you spread really interesting facts and accompany them with wondrous stories. I’m always amazed when you come out with all this crazy knowledge. Of course, it’s all down to research - but good grief, that’s some amazing drive. And honestly, I’m pretty envious. Creative; funny; smart; f**kin’ beefcake rocking your NOFKYO top; wonderful voice; ability to record your voice without sounding bad (seriously, is it practise? How do you do it? And how do you minimise voice clicks? - genuine questions); ability to play an instrument/compose decent music (Dog Wrestler Waltz omgggg); great personality... I’ve probably missed a bunch more. You truly are a wonder, monsieur space tortoise. 2. You speak your videos as someone who is coming from their heart. You sound as though the videos are your baby; you’ve birthed it into the world and you treat it with your own instinctual motherly love. Whether it requires enthusiasm, sincerity, laughter or otherwise... it sounds like you are spreading something from within yourself. No corporate bulls**t or ingenuity or whatever... literally just a space tortoise thinking about something sensational, putting it on paper, and sharing it with the world. (Picture of my room while watching your video: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1u7DWXn0pYf8NbYlOehQJJjVHORhwlTBM ) And may I add, I haven’t had a chance for a second viewing, but it was a lovely idea for a lovely video. I liked how you brought along the moving pictures from The Rememberer, too. And I found myself at the end just saying, “Please, Ex. Don’t let that be the end.” As it faded to black. I think you’ve done something right when someone sees something you’ve made and they want it to just keep going. Usually, ingesting entertainment for me is about getting to the end. But yours, and other similar masterpieces like “Rick and Morty” or “Stranger Things” etc, you are genuinely interested and want more. So... congratulations. 😊 And on that note... Much love and a very, very merry Christmas, as well as a glorious happy new year. Robot 💛
Enzo Elacqua
Did you hear about the minx thing? The whole after dying they started rising from their graves due to gas. This pandemic has caused truly the weirdest apocalypse scenario of all those we could’ve went through. :)
Cullen frierson
Pickles are gross
Nicolás Bitar
Glad to hear from you!
Nici
That was such a lovely video covering that parallel universe theory! Its always a pleasure hearing from you including today. Farewell and untill hopefully not an all too distant future.
Matthew Reynolds
Absolutely loved the new video. After watching it, it occurred to me by the look of confusion on my partners face, that they didn't know of the many worlds interpretation. Very weird discovery for me, all things considered. Alas I'm so glad to hear you've recovered from the most influential illness of the 21st century to date! I bought all your books even though they have been graciously donated to our humble patreon community, because I absolutely adored logic beach and couldn't stand thinking that I hadn't supported the creation of it monetarily. Well wishes from America ☮
Mads
Best catpics<3 Glad you're still breathing, keep on with that. We like you a lot here.
Silvija Basic
Glad you're alive, take care 👉👉
Kris Arruda
Glad you’re recovered! Dear Nia was excellent! Reminded me of a Ted Chiang story called “Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom”
katmai
try "love death and robots" it's a cool show.
Axel Olsson
Damn. I really hoped you'd be excused from this wretched virus. But alas, you are in fact just another mortal like the rest of us. P.S. Glad you're okay! D.S.
EggCess
So good to hear from you, and to know that you're alive and well. Thanks for the update, and .. congratulations (of sort?) for beating the damn virus. The last paragraph triggered a memory and I've had to look through my mails to confirm: Sure enough, I once sent you a convoluted and rather long mail, way back in July of 2018 (to exurb1achannel@gmail.com) with a weird thought that I had back then, about us (or any sentient species on any planet) being stuck inside a hard-physics bubble from which we can't escape, ever. Because physics. Unfortunately, I've never heard back from you about it, but lacked the chutzpah to ask whether you actually received or read it, until now :) Anyway, thank you for the update and the beautiful cat pictures (well, and the new video!). PS: Just take our damn money.
Mateusz Pruszczak
Hi There. Sad to hear that you catched virus as well hope all your senses are back to normal. I was infected something like a 1.5 months ago and still the smells are very weak to my nose. I'm really wondering why is that. Btw on FB I have sent you a 3d model of your logo I have designed in my spare time. Do what you want with it (if you send me an adres I could mail you 3d printed or maybe even metal version). Hope you are well cheers!
thisisaname42
I always appreciate being called a puffin, thank you!
ave_droid
Oh hell how I'm happy to see you alive! Will use this as a great excuse to say thank you for all of your books - reading those kept me alive and well and inspired for months during this pandemic. It's just so so cool to know hear from you.
Joakim
1. We're here because we want you to take our money. You seem to be the only one here not understanding this concept :) 2. You seem to be suggesting that lower productivity when under the wind from Covid somehow disqualifies you from sharing advice about writer's block? Personally I'd find the advice much more questionable if you never had dips in productivity ;) 3. Thank you. This continues to be one of my favorite ways to spend $1.
Ezekiel Rohan
Wonderful to hear from ye again, it's been a minute but I think most of us are pretty patient, the wait is always worth it. Absolutely stunning drop today, my lady and I must have sat in silence for 5 minutes after it ended just in shock. Super cool concept. Can't wait for the next book! Take care of yourself man :) Also, PS, whats the art on the music stand in one of the feline photo-ops? Looks cute
MPEW
<3 the new video
