exurb1r
patreon
Just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in
🕑 Added 2023-11-06 10:49:12 +0000 UTCHello chupacabras,
(If you don't know what a chupacabra is, I'd recommend not looking it up. I mean it as a term of endearment but the reality is quite awful.)
I noticed several emails recently asking if I was dead so thought I'd drop in to say not yet, apologise for still breathing, thank some new supporters in the most offensive way I can, make some recommendations, then fuck off for a few more months without explanation. I'm joking about that last bit. The rest are genuine intentions though.
How are you? You're looking well. That new bow tie/tiara/scarf/swingable iron mace really suits you. I've been thinking a bunch recently about how I don't really do much for those of you who've subscribed on here besides sending out daft messages every few months. I notice other folks on Patreon give out pins and badges and calendars and the like. I ummed-and-errered for a while about maybe hiring someone to take Patreon a bit more seriously and organise things like this, but the idea of telling another person what to do with money involved has never struck me as a fun process. (It's just as bad the other way around. As you can imagine, I've always been just the most helpful and motivated employee and don't have the slightest problem with authority whatsoever.) So I'm not sure if I can provide physical objects for your support, much as I'd like to. What might be an idea though is involving you a bit more in the whole process, if you'd like that. Some of you write with script suggestions and they're always very welcome, thanks for those – but another possibility: a few months ago I started work on something I hope will turn into the next book I put out. I won't spoil anything but there are some rather common threads with The Fifth Science if you know that one, broken chronology and lots of being miserable at the end of time etc. I've already abandoned about 40,000 words that just didn't quite fit or were chasing after the wrong story or whatever else. As a general rule, I usually just delete all that stuff because it's terrible or half-baked, but if you'd prefer I can make it public on here when it's all finished. I throw out about 10x more than I ever put up online, there's no reason I couldn't do the same with discarded scripts if you're curious, make it all public I mean. Well, just a thought. If you have any other suggestions for bribes – excuse me, Patreon rewards – mm, still not right – thank yous, then I'm all ears.
Anyway, I just dropped in to say hai. I've been working on a video about metaphysics that should be out shortly, and I do hope you like it. Plus some excuses for video essays for the second channel about the zen of cooking and astronomy and why I would rather eat my own spleen than buy an air fryer.
I spent a while in bed with the flu and have to say it was unexpectedly pleasant to be bed-bound. There's no possible chance you can get up and work, so you stop worrying about it for a while and consume written and televised nonsense instead. Enormous and relieving fun except for the flu part. Though of course you're fantasising about getting better again and can't believe you took good health so much for granted, and of course the second you're better you forget how ill you were and immediately return to being an ungrateful prick about it all and move on to new and exciting things to worry about. Ridiculous. I'm thinking of the crisis inducer from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (Patreon won't let me throw a hyperlink in for some reason, so: https://hitchhikers.fandom.com/wiki/Crisis_Inducer) a device that could trick you into thinking you had a broken arm or sprained leg when you didn't, just to give you the joy of working against a disadvantage.
And finally, obligatorily, some recommendations.
Maybe you haven't seen Killers of the Flower Moon yet. In which case could I gently suggest you immediately stop reading this and go to the cinema and see it. I'm no massive Scorsese fan but this was something else; the story of a group of Native Americans who found oil on their land, ended up getting rather rich off it, then attracted the attention of several murderous bastards who were interested in the money for themselves. And the thing is entirely based on a goddamn true story. Gorgeously filmed, perfectly written, and utterly heartbreaking. Can recommend.
Baldur's Gate 3, did we talk about that one? Finally an RPG where you can spend upwards of 50 hours levelling up your attack spells only to discover that pushing people right the fuck off ledges and cliffs is the best combat strategy. Genuinely though: wow. A friend and I have been doing respective playthroughs and I can't believe just what different experiences we're having. Some minor choice in the early game or some random dialogue decision you made because you'd had one too many glasses of wine, suddenly the universe changes around it. To those of you in the know, I accidentally turned everyone at Last Light Inn into zombies, whereas my friend saved that magic lady from the angry winged dude and we're both now playing completely different storylines. The attention to detail is absolutely insane, I'm not sure I'll ever quite comprehend how deep it runs. (It goes without saying that the only respectable class is sorcerer.)
Lock In, a John Scalzi novel I've been avoiding for ages now for some reason, that was quite a ride, I can recommend it. What would actually happen if 1% of the population fell mysteriously ill and ended up unable to move or communicate for the rest of their lives? The fact that the audiobook version was narrated by Wesley from Star Trek TNG added a whole bunch to the enjoyment also.
And finally something I may have recommended before but by Jove I'll do it again: Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott. I get rather stuck with writing often for weeks at a time and descend into just the most pathetically self-pitying state, a condition I'm absolutely certain at the time no one else ever has or ever could experience because I'm just that unique in my problems, what a unicorn I am etc etc etc. These days I go back to Bird by Bird. And there's always the right words waiting in there to gently remind me, no, you're not that special but you should probably just keep going, it'll be fine. If you're a wanderer on the art path or confronting any of the strange hydra heads that come with making stuff, I would strongly suggest having more Anne Lamott in your life. She's the ultimate nurturing voice of creativity and she swears like a trooper too.
Anyway. New stuff coming soon, promise. I hope you're doing well, weird as the world is at the moment. If you've just joined then a huge thank you for the support, and if you've been around for a while, well you should know better but an enormous thank you to you also.
Big love as always,
Ex
Comments
Ahry Siss
Well spend like 100h in the first Akt. Wanted to try out things and see how things change. This game is a Masterpiece. Had like a half a dozen completely different playthroughs. Enjoy.
Nick Dyer
Hey ... have you checked out one of the best up-to-date studies on consciousness so far written: The Hidden Spring by Mark Solms. Highly, highly recommended.
Siân Powell
Thanks for listening once again! I’m actually a huge fan of Fallout New Vegas, it’s one of the games that I replay over and over again. Mind you the last time was a few years back so I’m due another go. Might have to take a bit of a post apocalypse break after fallout 3 though. You definitely CAN have too much of a good thing! 😁 Best to you!
exurb1a
I say this every time, but it's true every time: always a pleasure to hear from a sentient robot such as yourself. The Dumb Song was a fantastic idea. I think about this all a fair bunch, how much of the process the audience really wants to see - and in this case it turned out to be an amazing idea, made the whole thing so much more organic in a way, no? Also a cracking tune in itself. Am I right in thinking there's a Hunger Games prequel coming out soon? I vaguely remember seeing an ad for something like that at the cinema. On the battle royale front, I wonder if you've fallen into Apex Legends at all, by far my favourite take on the genre anyway. Ohhhh thank you ever so much for the invitation, I'd be delighted, and glad to hear the shindig went well! A personalised poem is a wonderfully kind thought, I'm sure everyone appreciated it. And just had a read of the blurb for The Art of Rest, sounds right up my street. I must say, I find it quite difficult to chill unless I 'know' there's something in the pipe I'm excited about working on, project wise I mean. I'm sure everyone has these strange personal conditions for when they can finally relax. Anyway, wonderful to hear you're having more Finnish adventures, long may they continue, and a joy to read your updates as always, Massive love to you, mechanical being, Ex
exurb1a
Thanks Paolo!
exurb1a
Hola Bernd - you're ever so kind, thank you. Yeah, I have to say physical bribes don't really feel like a great idea, this has confirmed that. Cheers for setting me straight, genuinely much appreciated.
exurb1a
She's a gem
exurb1a
Paha
exurb1a
I have indeed! Was such a blast - I especially adored the sections about learning to speak Rocky's language.
exurb1a
I do apologise, I'll rectify this with the next post, promise.
exurb1a
A much nicer image!
exurb1a
Hello there Ahry. Totally agreed that the script could be tighter, 3 and a half hours is quiiiiiite an expectation on an audience. (And thanks for the lovely words there, that's much appreciated.) Oh paha, I can't imagine BG3 without a map, would drive me slowly insane. Some mad respect you've managed to do that so long, I must say. Just reached Baldur's Gate itself finally and oh boy things are getting rather hectic with murder plots and whatever else. Nothing near your 200hrs but it's still quite a ride. Anyway, thanks for sticking around and massive love.
exurb1a
Heard and noted, thanks MB
exurb1a
I am certain it does!
exurb1a
It looks great on you, Keith - and thanks!
exurb1a
Hola Siân - I'm quite sure you're right about the effort there, noted and noted, thank you. I must say, your recent episode on Celtic Myths and Legends about Samhain, absolutely brilliant. And totally in agreement that we're not so great at commemorating our dead these days or we've developed some rather strange attitudes about it - wonderful listen as always. Ohhh, I'm sure you've been told this a thousand times by other fans of the series, but New Vegas is such a treat, hope you get around to playing that too. Massive love and thanks for the support!
exurb1a
Roger that, Kyra - will do on both fronts, thanks
Cullen frierson
Have you listened to project Hail Mary by Andy weir yet? Cannot recommend it enough. On the same level as 2001 in my disgustingly humble opinion
fluffgoat
NO KIYTY PHOTOS NOOO
Emily Jane
It doesn't matter that I know what a chupacabra is because my dyslexic brain will always picture a capybara first :)
Ahry Siss
Thanks for the Update. Dont worry about such stuff. Be yourself and stay yourself, thats why we (at least I) support. If its a book or a video in a few months. It comes when it comes. Of course letting the ball go completely is not good for ones mentality but I dont fear such things for minds like yours. Dont think anyone needs any more of the stupid digital goody stuff or even physical. Thrown out scripts might be nice to read, just to have my brain produce more dopamine and ignore existence. Watched the movie but cant say I give it as much praise as you. Parts are too stretched out, slow and just the pure stupidity of the people involved makes me sad (based on a real story makes that even worse.) After so many deaths in the family, to not suspect the married in people or closest around that are after your money... sure. Baldurs Gate 3 is one of these gems that will stay with us for decades. Already sunk in around 200h. Though act 3 really needs more work. So I paused it for now. Guess one or two years down the line the game will be even better. Also played without a map, still a bug which makes it black for me. Increased the fun in the beginning but now it is a bit bothersome. Think the world is as it always has been. Thanks for the recommendations and have a wonderful winter. Hopefully we get more snow in sofia then last year... Wish you much motivation and inspiration in the creation process and till next time.
RobotWobot
'Ello Tortoise who is out of this world, Glad to hear you're alive. I am also alive (I think). Omg we have so much in common! ^_^ In terms of the whole "extra perks" thing - sure it would be cool (and I think more creative ideas would get more people to sign up), but do keep in mind that everyone who is currently signed up is getting exactly what they asked for: Paying you to make videos. Although having said that, maybe it would be worth reaching out to someone who interests you and ask them how they do it - maybe pick up a few ideas here and there and slowly incorporate them yourself. The idea of sharing unfinished scripts sounds lovely; I'd love to see maybe behind-the-scenes stuff like bloopers and dumb ideas. There's this song I've really got into recently by AJR called "The Dumb Song", and the music video is basically just them spending a year and a half working on it: https://youtu.be/yoD0CxhVoPE - it feels really admirable, relatable and humanising. It's generally lovely to see the process. I had a friend with the flu recently. They told me they (finally) watched The End of the F**king World and played Detroit: Become Human. Also "Bodies" on Netflix. I had COVID last year and found myself in a flywheel of watching random shit on YouTube, then ended up making a depressing video because I was going crazy. (If you really wanna watch it's here: https://youtu.be/k3_nRDNp638) Haven't played Baldur's Gate but I know bits about it... not enough to understand your amusing ramblings though. Which is fine, because it makes them so much more amusing. 😄 Lock In sounds positively terrifying hahaha. Have you ever read something that just makes you scared of something that's never gonna happen? Then again that's pretty much just horror in a nutshell heh. I love things that talk about the creative process that politely edge you towards the thing you're putting off. A while ago some friends recommended this video to me and it's just so lovely: https://youtu.be/K7prwH76kDA - I will add your book recommendation to my list. ^_^ To answer your question from your last reply: The Hunger Games - what made me so into it? Idk about anyone else but it released while I was in school. Seeing others enjoy it made me really want to enjoy it too. So I got into reading, and my goodness it was joyous to read. It was that phase of my life when I was read from the moment I left school to the moment I went to sleep. Then the Battle Royale games released - all starting with Minecraft Survival Games & The Hunger Games. Me? I knew where it came from and grew up with the rise of the genre - so I made it a mission to consume all the original books & movies that started it all. But other people? I guess they just all enjoy the concept of battle Royale - and that’s what made it a massive movie series. ...and finally, life updates: The big party went well. Everyone had a blast and I was just stressed the whole time. But I made a presentation with a poem, which had a verse for all 40 guests. The moment I started, my stress faded and I was finally having fun. That presentation lasted ~50 mins (thanks to hecklers haha) and everyone had a blast. Let me know if you come to the UK again; I'd love to invite you if I do another. 😄 I mean tbf I'd fly to Bulgaria just to meet ya. Currently reading "The Art of Rest", recommended by my therapist. It's basically the top 10 ways of resting. Lovely read. Went to Finland to see my friend again. It was very cold and I ate looots of sugar. Aside from that, I'm generally doing fine! As always, pleasure to hear from you again. Much love, Robot. 💛
K7QQQ
Maybe not to much merch. I would love some stickers or some pins though.
M B
I fund stories -- not souvenirs. I considering pondering the content of a T-shirt a waste of your time and my investment.
harpsichord
I actually JUST bought I new scarf. yesterday. great timing. I do think it suits me!
Keith Merrington
Thanks for the compliment on the scarf. Actually it's a bib. Alright it's a tea-towel tucked into my collar. But I'm eating pot noodles as I read your missive, so slurpy-slurp, splishy splashy - bib/tea-towel an absolute necessity. Anyway, nice to hear you're still alive and kicking. I look forward to your new metaphysics video - more than ready for my next dose of existential crisis.
Siân Powell
Gosh, thank you! I didn’t think anyone would notice my new swingable iron mace 😊🙈 As for Patreon rewards, the idea of some of your discarded scripts is nice! But I don’t think the world needs anymore pins and badges and tat! To put it kindly…might be more effort than it is worth :) Glad you’re better after the flu and definitely appreciate that first few weeks of proper self indulgence when it comes to being ill. Knowing you have a legitimate excuse to just STOP. Not that I’m very good at stopping either and I always spend the whole time feeling very sorry for myself but in hindsight those little rest periods are very important!! Thanks for the recommendations. I want to start Baldurs Gate 3 but instead I’ve been depressing myself with a Fallout 3 play through. My computer is a bit of an ancient relic from the far distant past so I’m forced to play the same 5 games over and over again! Excited to hear about your upcoming work, best of luck with it all!
Kyra van der Heijden
Please don't do merch. I would like more pictures of the fluffy rampager and a bit more regular updates so we know you're still alive. Could be as little as 1 post/picture every 1 or 2 months
PAOLO DANESE
Give us your trash, Ex, we'll find the pearls and enshrine them in immortality.
Bernd Lehahn
Just wanted to comment on the idea of sending out merch: PLEASE DONT. Not sure I talk for the majority of your supporters here, but IMO there is really no point in artificial gimmicks. I want to support your work and you as a person. It is an honour to be in touch with the creative mind behind this wonderful work and get an occasional SHORT personal message. Making merch or having somebody working for your Patreon would be quite contra productive. There are other types of creators for who this makes more sense (Kurzsgesagt is a great example) because their content is a lot less personal (and I do not mean this in a negative way, I am a big fan of Kurzgesagt). So instead of spending energy and creativity thinking about "bribes", just writing quick short messages is more than good enough for me. All the best for you! Take the time you need and enjoy your life!
Keltan O'shea
I second that bird by bird recommendation! Some of the best life advice ever is the chapter where Anne talks about her fucked jaw muscles.
Josh Watt
Wake up babe, new Exurb1a stream of consciousness just dropped
