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429 Exploring a Changed City

🕑 Added 2025-04-30 21:45:20 +0000 UTC

Comments

Really_Big

I don't believe deferential is an error here.

Napalm078

"Legacies are awards that may be granted to select guild members, and they may be granted on a deferential basis." *granted on a differential basis. "Anyways, thanks for getting me sorted out. I appreciate." *out. I appreciate it. "Her skin tone was brighter than her brothers, closer to caramel than dark Earth." *caramel than dark earth.

Sebastian Berobo

Another great chapter, thank you. I really enjoyed this one!

Monsoon117

The characters spliced whenever I was writing since I spent some time drafting them at the same time. It was Connor the entire time.

Monsoon117

Thanks and fixed.

Monsoon117

I've messed up there. Micky was another character I was drafting up elsewhere, and I ended up interchanging them as a I wrote this. It's all Connor, all the way down.

EsZeus

"their your throat." Their -> through

EsZeus

??? He introduced himself as Connor. And then in the following sentences he was Micky?

EsZeus

"Micky stood" Connor*

Wrath

I feel like him giving out the. Rings, rather than a reward for competency and trust, there's a little irresponsible.

Michael Moore

You kinda cooked with that last sentence

crusty pickle

loved this chapter, it was fun to imagine the city and the interactions/ worldbuilding was interesting. Thanks for the chapter

Xepen

Hey I’ll never complain about a long chapter 😂.

Squekers

Concern that I'm tripping out here. It says Connor, then is like retconned to Micky right after: Excerpt: "Well, hell yeah. I'm glad to hear it. By the way, what's your name?" He reached out a hand. "Connor." I grabbed his hand. "Daniel. What will the cloak cost? And a rifle or some normal-looking weapons." Micky scratched the side of his head. :End of Excerpt Then it goes back to Connor later after using Micky a few times; Excerpt: As I walked off, I had to shake off some unease. Connor had held that trinket like he was Gollum, and :End of Excerpt

Monsoon117

Alright everybody, please don't throw rotten tomatoes at me. The chapter ended up being over 7k words long, and it was a lot to write out and edit. It was a lot of fun, but I couldn't get every bit of it polished before my normal deadline on Tuesday. Assuming the next chapter isn't some colossal behemoth like this one, I'll have a chapter out tomorrow as well. So yeah guys, I hope you all enjoy.


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