AStoryForOne
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Chapter 107
🕑 Added 2022-03-01 03:36:01 +0000 UTCMC's adventure with Roman is coming to an end. So i heard the feedback form last chapter, i'll edit it a bit so it isn't quite so 0-100 in a few sentences.
***
“Mother Fucker.” Roman shouted, kicking the door open as Neo climbed through the window on her side, the door practically caved it.
My door was stuck enough that I just rammed it with my shoulder, breaking it thoroughly off its hinges.
I got out in time to see Roman Aim his cane up, the bottom sliding open to become a crosshairs as a bullet was launched out the bottom. It collides with the vehicle that just ran into us, several people running out as it blew up.
“Were those police..?
“No, they were wearing Malachite’s colors.” Roman snorted, as we both saw Neo bounce over, taking the two goons down with relative ease.
“Nice Cane.” I commented. “Didn’t realize it’s a gun.”
“Hah, more than a gun.” He smirked.
“Makes me miss mine.” I sighed. “Was just a hidden sword, but it had sentimental value.”
Maybe I should get another made at some point? It’s not something I would walk around with all the time, I can’t really pull off a cane like Roman can unless certain events dictate such a showing.
“As much as I would love –“ Roman was interrupted, a bullet whizzed by, nicking his hat. There was a moment of silence as Roman Calmly raised his cane again and unloaded a series of dust-based bullets in the direction of the shot. “Well, I think we should get going.”
“How far away is the bullhead?”
“Halfway across the city.”
“Joy.” I sighed, this was turning into a mess. “Neo, how are your illusions for long term?”
She shook her hand for a ‘so-so’ gesture.
I saw movement out of the corner of my eye and raised my sword up, a bullet colliding with the flat of my blade right before it would have connected with Neo – or rather her Aura. “Careful there.” I sent her a wink.
She rolled her eyes, exaggeratedly ‘swooning’.
“Oh, come off it.” I shook my head, another shot ringing out as I stepped to the side. “Alright, this is getting annoying, how the fuck did they know where we were?” They apparently set up enough to take pot shots at us.
“Unfortunately, the spider knows my usual strategies, and Neo used to be one of her best enforcers.” He aimed his Cane, using it as a gun and continued to fire away as he noticed more gang members pop up. “Wouldn’t be surprised if she has ambushes set up all over the place.”
A few screeching tires echoed out as a handful of cards came around the corner, stopping a distance away. Dozens of people getting out, all armed to the teeth.
“Mustard!” Roman exclaimed.
The man at the forefront growled. He had bleach blonde hair, and a tacky yellow suit on. “MY NAME IS NOT MUSTARD.”
“Hey there Mustard, it’s been a while. Still rocking that same look.” Roman casually ignored his indignation. Neo looked amused by the whole thing.
“Hey mustard, how’s it going?” I waved.
His head snapped to me, a scowl on his face. “This brat your protégé or something?”
“No.””Yes.”
“Fuck off Roman.”
“Kid takes after me.” Roman chuckled.
“He has that same punchable face.” Mustard grunted.
“Why do people keep saying that!?” Do I really have a punchable face?
“Hate to tell you kid – “
“Roman, enough.” Mustard interrupted. “You know why we’re here.”
“Your unconditional surrender?” I interjected. “Perhaps an apology, for interrupting my tournament?”
“Quiet, brat. The adults are talking.”
I turned to Roman who raised an eyebrow at me. Then I looked at Neo who just hit me with a big grin.
“Hey Roman, did you see my first match?”
“What the hell are you talking abou—” Mustard asked in confusion as I tossed a large dust crystal in his direction.
Roman brought up his Cane, with a practiced ease, he shot the crystal in mid-air, initiating a large explosion right in Mustard’s face.
My eyes widened slightly as this strange yellow barrier blocked the brunt of it, only the faintest shimmer of Aura around the goon. Several bodies now littered the area, but most of the men were downed, and the remainder mostly consisted of Aura-users.
The ‘barrier’ collapsed onto the ground coating it in a strange liquid like texture, almost like – “IS THAT FUCKING MUSTARD?” I couldn’t help but shout.
“IT’S NOT MUSTARD DAMMIT.”
I couldn’t help but start laughing.
“Did you think I called him that because of his sense of fashion?” Roman snorted, holding back a laugh himself. “His semblance makes that goopy stuff that looks like mustard.”
Neo was practically falling over herself, silently laughing along side us.
“KILL THEM.” Mustard shouting as weapons were raised and fired.
Roman Jumped to the side, Neo disappeared, and I drew my sword.
I didn’t feel like getting bombarded by a deluge of bullets, so I dashed to the side behind a building.
A man with a tattoo down his face ran at me, axe in one hand as he swung through a light pole with a surprising ease. His skill was mildly surprising, he wasn’t’ just overcompensating with pure strength, each of his swings that tried to cleave me were followed up with the right movements to capitalize on his build.
Flicking my sword, I created a sword phantom that collided with his chest. A single bird was easy enough to do without any setup at this point.
He was knocked off his feet, his Aura dipped noticeably as it got much dimmer around his body. Following up with a quick knee to his head, he was knocked down for the count.
I looked over to see Neo dancing between several goons, several of which would appear to be on about the same level as this guy.
“Damn girl.” I couldn’t help but comment. Her fighting style was quite fun to watch, actually.
She turned towards me and give me a wink, using her umbrella to slap one of the guys in the balls, eyes never leaving my own.
Yeah, I can see what you mean, Miltia.
Hefting the downed guy up, I threw him at one of the goons trying to gang up on Neo as I joined her little brawl.
A quick trust to one holding a hammer as Neo glided behind me, unfurling her umbrella to block another’s vision as she swiped at his legs.
Without looking back, I turned my sword around and stabbed down at him, a shriek filling the area. Neo Vanished with her semblance, appearing behind the one I had just stabbed, Kicking him in the back of the knees, then following up with a smack across his face with her umbrella.
I stabbed out with my blade at the final one, as she slid under and used the hoof of her umbrella to further pull him into the sword.
The man let out a gargled cry before Neo uppercut him in the chin and I elbowed him in the chest, his eyes rolled back, falling to the ground.
We turned towards Roman who was having a sort of duel with their leader.
“CAREFUL ROMAN, YOU’RE GOING TO GET MUSTARD ON YOUR SHIRT.” I decided to shout helpful advice. Though that seemed to invigorate his opponent for some odd reason, because he just shouted and angrily started attacking more recklessly.
I looked down at Neo. “This was fun, we should do it again sometime.”
Neo looked up at my inquisitively before enthusiastically nodded her head.
Roman finally cracked the goon across the face with his Cane, the yellow man falling to the ground. He straightened his hat, walking towards us. “Whew, that felt good.” He let out a breath. “Always hated that guy, such a kiss ass. If Malachite had a dick, he would have been on his knees every day.”
“I only caught the end of it, looked like it mustard been a hard fight.”
Roman paused, looking at me as I smiled wide. “You just took all the excitement out of my win.” He took out a cigar, lighting it up and take a smoke. “Well done.”
“Hey.” I looked in the distance. “Are bullheads supposed to be flying that close to the city.” I raised my finger to the skyline.
“No. No they are not.” Roman said evenly. “I believe it is time to depart.” He turned and very – very briskly broke out into a sprint to the nearest car and turned the key. “Get the fuck inside!”
Don’t gotta tell me twice, I hopped into the back seat and didn’t even have time to close the door before Roman peeled out and floored it into the direction of what I could only assume was the bullhead. We managed to get several intersections down before the bullheads made it above us.
“PULL OVER AND GET ON THE GROUND, THIS IS YOUR ONLY WARNING.” A voice boomed out from the speakers connected to the bullhead.
“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me.” Roman kept chanting as he swerved around a corner, deeming it better to go down streets with no people. Though it seemed like everyone got the message as most had already gone indoors.
Thankfully, the huntsman academy seemed to be on the other side of the city, so it would take a bit for huntsman response.
Neo started tugging on my sleeve, pointing towards the bullhead, my eyes widened as I saw what was happening. “ROMAN, PROBLEM.”
“BUSY HERE.” He shouted, turning the steering wheel quickly to the side to avoid a police cruiser that just barely missed us, as me and Neo practically tumbled in our seats.
A compartment on the bullhead following us opened, a damn missile revealed itself. “They’re not really going to fire that in the middle of the city….right?” I asked Neo, who did not have a reassuring look on her face.
It did launch right at us. My Mirage flew out the widow to meet it, the explosion erupted right behind the car, causing the back tires to pop with Roman doing his best to not flip us as we grinded to a halt.
“Roman what the hell!?”
“What did I do!?”
“They’re firing damn missiles at us in the middle of the city!” I gestured.
“I don’t know why! They shouldn’t be this gung ho.” He kicked open his door and began firing on the bullhead, though without much success. “Fuck, I’m out.” He grunted.
Me and Neo took cover behind the car, the Bullhead hovered above the buildings, guns pointing at us. She did the obvious thing and shielded us in illusions as our previous selves were torn apart by a rain of bullets.
“Don’t suppose you got any ammo on you, kid.” Roman looked at me.
“I got something you can use.” I reassured him.
“Great, what is –“
I took out the giant purple dildo and threw it, smacking him in the face. It fell to the ground as he blinked. “Okay, I’ll give you that one.”
Neo was rolling on the ground laughing, yet still managing to keep her illusions going.
“Actually, give me that back.” I held out my hand. “I’ll take down this bullhead with that thing.”
“Kid, if you take out that bullhead with this dildo, I’ll give you unlimited drinks at juniors.”
Well, if I hadn’t already decided on this course of action before.
I held the thing in my hand, activating my circuits and filling the ‘weapon’ with Reinforcement. Something I never thought I would ever do in my life.
Using it like a Javelin, I reeled back and threw it towards the pilot’s window. It easily penetrated the glass, hitting the pilot right in the face, causing him to lose control and spiral off into the road.
Roman and Neo were both silent. “I want to adopt you.” He suddenly said.
Neo looked at me and made a motion of pushing a finger through her other hand with her index finger and thumb making an ‘O’.
“Okay….a lot to process there. Let’s shelve all this for now and get the fuck out of here.”
“Right, right.” Roman nodded. “The bullhead shouldn’t be far away.”
***
“Roman!?” The familiar voice of Miltia basically shrieked at us as we finally found our ride.
“Oh brothers. Can we not? I already got an earful from the kid.” Roman sighed.
With flames in her eyes Miltia gestured to the bodies littered on the ground around them.
“Want a trophy?” Roman just snorted. “We ran into the same crap on the way here.”
“I took down a bullhead with a Dildo.” I added.
“Roman, this isn’t what –” Miltia paused, looking at me. “What?”
“We got company!” Melanie shouted over our bickering. Our eyes followed the direction she was looking. Police cards with their sirens blaring down the street.
Miltia quickly sat down in the pilot’s seat, flicking buttons and starting the engines.
“Bullhead 7404-A38, you are not clear for take off, turn your engines off.” A voice come over the comms.
I rolled my eyes “This is Bullhead 7404-A38.” I grabbed the communications link, basically looking like a radio. “I believe there has been a misunderstanding. We were cleared for takeoff ten minutes ago. Over.” Wonder if I could stall for a few more moments.
“Bullhead 7404-A38, you are not clear for takeoff. I repeat, you are not cleared for takeoff. If you violate mistral airspace, you will be considered a hostile.”
“This is Bullhead 7404-A38, I have been instructed to inform you that if you do not allow us to safely take off, Roman Torchwick will do to you what he did to the last bullhead that came after us.”
“Oh what the hell?” Roman gawked at me.
“What did Roman Torchwick do?” An older voice came over the intercom this time.
“He said he took the last bullhead down with nothing but a dildo. And he is very armed at the moment.” I smiled at Roman. “Proceed at your own risk.” I clicked it off.
“Oh fuck you!” Roman scowled.
I just chuckled. “That’s going to take on a new meaning around you for now on.”
“Brothers dammit, I’m never going to hear the end of this now.” He facepalmed.
“Everyone sit down and shut up, we’re taking off.” Miltia raised her voice as we all filed into our seats. The Bullhead took to the air before the cops could arrive and we easily cleared the area, getting up out of the city, but almost immediately three more bullheads followed after us. “We still got some on our tail.”
“Three, no four.” I squinted. “Wait, one of them looks different, why is half of it painted yellow?’
Roman perked up. “Is that a news bullhead?”
“Are you serious?” I looked at him, taking my scroll out and flipping through it until I came up on the news channel.
There was a woman with a mic in her hand, hair blowing as her voice was hard to hear over the harsh winds. “This is Pearl checking in with a deadly chase that took to the skies just moments ago.” I looked a the bullhead from the window and back down to the scroll. “We received word that notorious criminal Roman Torchwick and his Partner Wilhelm Schweinorg have stolen a bullhead with Mistral authorities in pursuit. We have yet to calculate the damage they’ve caused in their wake, but my sources say that lethal force has been authorized.”
“Roman.” Miltia’s voice cold. “Did she just say, lethal force?”
“I do believe she did.”
“Roman.” She said ever so calmly. “Why are they authorized to use lethal force on us.”
“Probably because Roman stole super secret military stuff from your mom, who stole it from Atlas, who then was going to sell it to the government, who is keen on either burying the evidence, or retrieving said secrets.” I explained.
“I better be getting a huge payout for this.” Melanie scowled. “I noticed you didn’t bring any cargo with you.” Her eyes narrowed dangerously at Roman.
“Calm yourself sweetheart, I stashed the good stuff when I realized how hot things got. Besides, if we play this right, we can probably sell this Atlas stuff for several million Lien.”
“Million!?” Melanie balked.
“That’s a lowball.” He smirked. “But we need to clear Mistral territory first.”
Damn, wasn’t the haul estimated to only be a few hundred thousand when everything was said and done?
“I’m trying, but they’re catching up. We aren’t exactly in a military craft here, Roman.” Miltia growled, before her eyes widened. “They’re arming weapons!”
“Shit, we got anything in this hunk of junk?” Roman started looking around.
“It’s a civilian airship!” Miltia shouted. “Why would there be weapons!” She turned to me.” Wilhelm, do that sword thing.”
“What sword thing?” Roman turned to me.
“Did you not watch the tournament?”
“I was preoccupied!”
I didn’t answer. “Miltia, can you open the back?”
“Easy.” She flicked a button and the loading door behind us began to open up.
I stepped to the edge, the sudden air almost made me stumble. I allowed my sword to fly out, shooting at the bullheads like missiles, slashing at their wings.
“Oh shit!” Roman gawked. “When the hell did you learn to do that!?”
I ignored the question again, staring at the bullheads make a downturn towards the ocean below. “They should be fine.” I stated, my swords returning to me. “Though the news is still following.”
“’Eh, they’ll be forced to turn around in a moment, we’re about to leave Mistral airspace.” Roman waived it off. “Hell, they’ll probably be forced to – “
A shadow appeared under the tides, a massive figure breached the surface, huge waves slamming against the floating wrecks.
“That is a big fucking Sea Feilong.” Roman looked surprised.
“I’ve never seen a Grimm that big before, is that a Titan?” Melanie stated.
“Um guys….it’s looking right at the cops.” I pointed out.
“Shit, nothing we can do, that’s just bad luck.” Roman tilt his hat.
“We’re just going to leave them like that?” I asked. “I don’t mind dealing with the gangs, but they guys were just doing their jobs, and they’re objectively on the right side of the law here…”
“Kid, we got no weapons, what do you expect to do against something that big?” He waived his hand at the massive creature. “Just be glad it isn’t you down there.” He went back to his seat.
I…..
Dammit.
I can’t in good conscious leave them there to die. “Sorry.” I looked at Miltia who eyed me weirdly.
“Wilhelm, what are you doing?”
I stepped towards the edge of the back platform, giving her a smile before I stepped off. A portal opened up below me as I fell through, another appearing high up in the sky, giving me a good look at the Sea Feilong below.
It looked almost draconic in nature. A sea serpent with huge wings.
Falling through the air, I drew Mirage, and my magical energy exploded out. Spell circles flowed around my blade and I pulled on the Kaleidoscope. The sky above me shifted, an Aurora sprang, a cascade of magical energy that created torrent of color.
The thing looked up, focusing on me intently. It unfurrowed its wings, as if to fly up and devour me.
I held my sword back as I gathered the last of the magical energy I needed from an infinite amount of Parallel worlds.
“Ether Cannon!” I swung my sword as a massive amount of magic was discharged. It collided straight down on the creature, the water displaced and creating a tidal wave in every direction.
The iridescent beam of light penetrating the water and completely obliterating the Grimm along with anything else that laid below.
Welp, that takes care of that…..The wind practically yanked the binding off my pony tail as I continued to fall through the air.
I looked to the side to see the Bullhead hovering nearby, Roman at the edge with his Cain, when the head suddenly shot off towards me.
A grappling hook?
Gods that’s so fucking cool!
I grabbed it with ease as he began to reel me in. I was surprised at the tensile strength of this thing. Probably some sort of carbon-fiber.
“You are one crazy mother fucker.” Roman huffed, pulling me on board.
“Hey, thanks for the save.” I smiled, even if I could just open a new portal. But it was the thought that counts.
“Whatever, kid.” He snorted. “So….the fuck was that?”
“What was what?” I smiled innocently.
“You know....” He took out another Cigar, and I was now wondering if his Semblance created them, because I have no idea where he stashed so many. “I’m beyond caring at the moment.” He went to his seat and slumped down. “Miltia, takes us home please.”
I just shrugged, Neo looking at me oddly and both sisters giving me glances.
Well, I guess they share the same sentiments at the moment, this has been an odd adventure.
Looking out the window, I noticed the news still hovering over there.
Huh.
It’s not like things could get even worse after getting shown using my Magic.
Comments
vees
This story is amazing! The comedy is awesome as well!
AStoryForOne
Wanted his first to be Meridia
Holosagewolf
You’ve been building his harem for a bit now but i have a question. When is he going to get laid? Also please please please tell me he will bring roman and neo to skyrim. They would fuck with the thieves guild so hard
