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Stop it, Bro~ (32)
🕑 Added 2022-09-29 20:51:02 +0000 UTCTitle: The Ocean Giveth Fools (1)
In the Great Age of Pirates, many have renowned themselves for their sheer craftsmanship as ships of various features, sizes, colors, and shapes would mark the Ocean, trying to lead their Captain to the end of it all! But this wasn't such a ship. It was barely 9 meters in length and only had one cabin. Its sail was purely black and its mast was unmarked.
Pedaling the ship were two individuals. One of them had '9' tattooed on both of his cheeks while the woman wore her back-lengthed blue hair in a ponytail. Even if they were quite far from their destination, the giant red 'wall' was all but visible by the horizon and their gaze twinkled.
"Mr. 9," the woman spoke while looking at the 'tiny' silhouette visible even from such a great distance!
"Yeah, Miss. Wednesday!" Mr. 9 spoke with an excited expression.
"I'll inform Mr. 5 and Miss. Valentine. Continue rowing," The light-blue-haired Miss. Wednesday stood up and knocked on the cabin's door while wondering what her superiors had been upto this entire trip since they would only show themselves during meal time.
"What is it?" A deep and calm voice inquired.
"Ack—" Ignoring the gasp from Mr. 9 since he could be too excited at times, Miss. Wednesday reported, "We have almost reached our destination and we also have the target in sight. That whale can be viewed past the entire horizon!"
*Splash*
A sudden wave crashed into the ship as she reported, almost throwing the boat over as the voice questioned in annoyance, "What is it now?"
Yet, the woman couldn't respond as a large shadow bloated the ship with the terrifying dragon head staring at her inches away from the hull of the ship as her wholly red eyes blinked.
"So? I'll ask this only once," A snicker made Miss. Wednesday and Mr. 9 look at the top of the cabin as a red-haired youth sat cross-legged with an earnest expression. He wore black trousers and a white jacket lined with green fur. "Which one of you fools is my gut sensing a great adventure from?"
Both of their eyes were wide in shock and their jaws hung low as their bodies remained seized up by surprise and the fact that a literal sea king had its face inches away from them!
*Bang*
The entire roof of the cabin suddenly blew up alongside the eager youth sitting on top of it.
---
"Tashigi-chan," Though younger, Nami easily called Tashigi as such with a smirk, "Remind me one thing. Captain's favorite jacket that he took from your former captain... is it fireproof?"
Tashigi slowly shook her head while Nami continued to watch from her scope, "Heh, serves him right... eh, does that mean he won't cover himself from now on?"
---
*Tsss*
The low sound of something being charred echoed as the Dragon stretched its mouth to try and bite onto the pieces of wood blown up from the ceiling of the cabin unsuccessfully as it spat it right into the sea.
Footsteps echoed as the door in front of Miss. Wednesday was pulled open to reveal two individuals. Still shocked at what she'd witnessed, Miss. Wednesday remained rooted to the surface of the ship as the two figures looked up at the smoking ceiling and then turned to face Pinky.
"What? Just some oversized turtle."
"Kyahaha! Let's deal with them and complete our mission, Mr. 5!"
*Roooaaaaarrrrrrrrrr!*
Pinky's red eyes glowed and she roared with the surface of the ocean shaking itself as her throat bulged slightly and the air around her open mouth began to distort gradually.
"Idiot!" A shout froze everyone's expression as Brody began to dust what remained of his jacket and trousers while glaring at Pinky, "When we try to have fun, never start by going all out! Only do that when you're really trying to kill or maim the enemy!" Pinky bit back the air cannon and nodded as Brody looked at the duo, "Not that it would actually be any different now that you destroyed the jacket I got from my friend!"
If he heard this, Tashigi was sure that Captain Smoker would remain unrestful even in his grave!
Stepping out with a sigh but thoroughly surprised by such a great welcome, Brody observed the dark-skinned man in a tanned brown trenchcoat with shades covering his eyes and his black hair worn in spiked, somewhat unruly dreadlocks. A white-colored number '5' was imprinted over the left chest of his coat and both of his shoulders.
His gaze then fell over to a short-haired blonde with a large lemon rounded hat covering her head as her sea-blue pupils revealed the sadistic glint that Brody ever observed in Nami in recent days when she would try to get back at him for something she initiated. Not that Brody minded, it made his days less boring and at the end of the day, Nami did like to spoon even when she had recovered completely. The woman in front of him, leaning towards a petite side but with noticeably wider hips and shapely legs which she fully flaunted in her short, thigh-reaching lemon dress held a tiny umbrella in her hand.
"So, I know I said I'll only say it once but let me repeat," Barely fazed by the explosion, Brody looked at the four of them. The fools. He was happy. He did the praying dance every morning and lo, behold, his wishes came true!
The Ocean Giveth Fools!
But the Ocean was simply too kind to him. After all—
"Who am I getting this sense—"
"Who are you?" The man in the brown trenchcoat interrupted.
"Before that," The woman chimed with her eyes narrowing down, "What is a Marine officer doing here close to the entrance of Grandline all alone?"
Brody blinked.
"Marine?" He frowned.
"Do you think just because it's ruined I won't recognize one of the earliest designs of the Marine Jackets worn only by a few these days... wait," she frowned, "Red hair... oblivious nature... marine jacket and a sea king... Mr. 5. I believe this is our 'target', Brody."
"What? So you really did come here to fight!" Brody grinned as Mr. 5 interjected once again, "Far from it. We were sent by our boss to invite you."
"Kyahaha! And to hunt," the woman laughed.
"Oye, what about your friends?" Brody pointed at the duo behind them as Mr. 5's partner continued, "Oh, they are here to hunt the Giant Whale for food."
"I see..." Brody hummed and turned around, promptly entering the cabin as all four of their expressions froze!
"What are you doing?" Mr. 5 frowned as he heard Brody's drawling tone, "Man you guys are boring. I'll deal with you later. Let me find a log pose so that I and my friends can finally travel."
"Don't be ridiculous! Just because we're here on Boss' order doesn't mean that we can't hurt you! Our original orders were to intercept and kill you!" Mr. 5 berated as the sound of rummaging from within the cabin stopped and Brody walked out of the structure with a smile, "You should have said that before. But are you sure? Your friends don't look too eager."
Mr. 9's and Miss. Valentine's expressions were pale since the moment they heard of Brody's identity as Mr. 5 scoffed, "Friends? Our world doesn't need any. They are merely weak fodder fit to be ordered and make use of at Boss' disposal."
"How about we land?" The woman smiled.
"Hmm... strange bomb... say, did you eat a devil fruit?" Brody questioned.
"Yeah. I have eaten Bomu Bomu no Mi. I'm a Bomb Man—"
Mr. 5's view changed as he suddenly found himself falling face first into the ocean while Brody entered the cabin once again, "Remind me to go pick him up in a minute, okay?"
The trio was stunned before the lemon woman turned to Mr. 9 and Miss. Valentine, "What are you doing? Go bring him out!"
"Y- Yes!"
The duo instantly jumped into the Ocean.
"Huff— eee!" Her eyes widened and a yelp escaped her lips as she found the dragon-headed Sea King closing in on her and huffing as a deep fishy scent suddenly pervaded around the ship as the woman matched Pinky's red gaze by slowly recovering her calm.
A hand suddenly patted her shoulder as she looked back with a frown, finding Brody looking at a watch-like single-pointed compass in a glass sphere as he spoke, "So? What was that about killing me? Did your Boss send someone fun?"
Discreetly gulping but still keeping a practiced smile, the woman laughed, "Kyahahaha! You can call me Miss. Valentine and the one you threw in the ocean is Mr. 5. Indeed, we were sent here for you but after learning about your misdeeds in East Blue, Boss wants you by his side."
"By his side?" Brody tilted his head, "Is he a fool or something?"
"What... what are you talking about?" Miss. Valentine questioned with an incredulous gaze.
"I mean, only a fool would think I'd join their crew," Brody blinked, "And I did pray for fools. So, he must be a fool, no?"
"Pray?" Miss. Valentine questioned, "We didn't expect you to be religious."
*Splash*
Mr. 9 and Miss. Wednesday finally pulled Mr. 5 out of the water but giving them not a single glance, Brody grinned, "Anyway, fools or not, say, wanna join my crew? What can you do? Hey, do you play an instrument?"
"Haa! Haa! If it wasn't for Boss' orders, you'd be dead!" Mr. 5 gasped for breath as the remaining duo helped him up while Brody frowned, "Boss this and Boss that! Can't you say something else?"
"You don't understand, Brody 'Ruin' Hanma, Kyahahaha!" Miss. Valentine laughed, "Read this."
Taking out a letter slid under her closed umbrella, the walking lemon handed it to him.
Huffing, Brody curiously opened the letter and then read its content loud enough, "Guaranteed freedom from the chase of marines and pirates out for my bounty... being part of an ideal nation... unlimited wealth and prestige..."
Brody suddenly jumped up and never returned down as all four of their gazes widened while he shouted, "Do you think I'm a fool, too!"
His low kick generated an arc of sharp air pressure that instantly cut the ship in half.
"Aaaghhhh!"
While the duo who had helped Mr. 5 out of the water screamed as their ship began to sink, Miss. Valentine suddenly opened her umbrella and jumped while laughing, "Kyahaha! I can fly, too, Brody Hanma! Eating the kilo kilo no— Wait, where are you going?"
Kicking the air and soon sitting on top of Pinky's head, Brody shrugged, "My gut is still saying something interesting is going on but sadly, I've lost my jacket and my interest. Thanks for the Log Pose, I won't hurt you. Oh, and how about it? Wanna join my crew?"
"Of course, not!"
"Eh? Why? You did join a fool who believes in Ideal Nation or some shit like that. I'm a hundred times better than him."
"Are you not hearing me? You can be rid of marines and pirates—"
"Let's go, Pinky. Staying near foolish people can erode our mental well-being, too."
"Auughhh!" She whined softly and turned around before floating away but Miss. Valentine continued to float over them, "Don't ignore me! Just because you have a bounty of 99,000,000 doesn't make you any stronger! Our organization has many strong criminals that can easily take you down!"
Brody's nose twitched, his gut contracted briefly and he gently patted Pinky's nose as she came to a stop.
"Now you're talking with the tongue of wise. Strong men..." Brody looked up with a grin, "The sounds like a challenge! Give me a minute. I and my crew will face these strong men of yours!"
"Damn you, I also meant myself!" Hissing and losing her smile for the first time, Miss. Valentine shouted, "Screw that! I'll show you the might of Ten Thousand Kilograms Press!"
Her body began to sink in as she aimed at Pinky's head with her knees. Her slow descent turned into a swift fall as she grinned malevolently, not even expecting Pinky to look up and open her mouth.
"Fool! I'll tear your insides—"
A massive blast of shock suddenly struck Miss. Valentine but she was too 'heavy' and instead of flying away, her course was altered.
*Plop*
And she entered the sea.
"Ahhhh! Help her out, Miss. Wednesday!" Mr. 9 shouted hurriedly as he helped Mr. 5 swim up.
*Huff*
Pinky snorted through her nostrils as Brody shrugged, "Stupid... but did she say 10000 kilos?" His eyes began to gradually glow and then he grinned. Before the blue-haired Miss. Wednesday could even save the drowning lemon, Brody laughed, "My days of boredom end here! And my days of training begin!"
With that, he dove into the Ocean as his tattered grey jacket completely tore away from his body while the back of his trousers was the same. With the back of his trousers not connected to the front, the wind rode up the remaining fabric that covered Brody's eyes and he gasped while flailing midair, "Oye! I can't see! What trickery is this?!"
*Splash*
Meanwhile, Pinky curiously leaned forward and bit onto the fluttering charred fabric, and scowled.
