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Industrious - Chapter 40

🕑 Added 2023-06-01 01:52:27 +0000 UTC
Industrious - Chapter 40

Comments

ZloGlaZ

So, did his clone has 10 years of knowledge accumulated?

Slayer Anderson

I’ll consider this and might make a few changes or elongate a part. Upon further review, I think it does need something more, I’m just not sure what. Another good reason for a hiatus, though.

xPYROTECHx

It still feels like it’s missing a wrap up to the conclusion. Something like a Hiruzen POV of getting a debriefing from the MC of what actually happened, or maybe a POV of Yakumo now being able to hear her new chakra daughter and being there for the debriefing. This arc felt very disjointed and unclear imo.

Acrimonius

This chapter seemed too close to the “metaphysical is important” genre. It leaves us with a lot of questions and no answers, or only gives ones that require a very specific cultural knowledge to interpret. Not a good idea for a story if it doesn’t occur in the main medium.

Slayer Anderson

I'll consider changing things, but one of the side-stories/spin-offs I have an idea for is indeed a crossover.

Zerak

It does actually add one thing. It shows us how his clones would act if separated from him for a long enough time.

pomegranate horsie

I didn’t think it was a cliffhanger, what part of this arc do you feel is still unresolved that shouldn’t be?

Aesh

I also think the clone thing was kind of jarring from a readers perspective. It doesn't seem to add anything, unless you plan to make this some type of crossover fic down the line.

Zerak

That felt like a setup for a spin-off.

Johny5

Even after countless statements to the contrary, Satsuki still wanted him to be a shinobi at her side. They're going to have a conversation about this, aren't they? There are some things Satsuki really has to let go of. I assume Kokoro wishes to really be 'born' would be the promise?

Guilherme Bezerra

It is not exactly a cliff. The Arc and its plot has been resolved more or less. Frankly the clone felt more like the setup for another fic down the line. I don't think it is going to come over again in this writing. I am more amused that Kota got himself a daughter and hasn't even gotten his harem fully ready yet. I think he is going to have a mental breakdown at this rate though.

Slayer Anderson

This is definitely not a cliffhanger. As the latest chapter indicates, the arc was resolved and they're out of the illusion. If what happens at the end isn't sufficiently clear, I *can* clarify it. Do you think that would help?

Vanathor

Going on a hiatus during a cliff hanger. Seriously?


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