OverXelous
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5.1 Primordial Will (Rewrite)
🕑 Added 2025-01-22 13:50:05 +0000 UTCThis chapter is a pretty drastic change as well. The two major changes were:
I had Alex be a lot less whiny about his trait. I had mentioend that he was a video game player, even if not in the last few months, he should understand what that trait means a little more than I had him originally just thinking it was "trash". It's not trash. You know it. He should likely know it. He still doesn't quite understand the gravity of it, but he doesn't think it's total crap, just a headache to be locked into one stat and bummed that he didn't get something cooler like a fireball.
The other big change was that his conversation with John and his group is a good bit more friendly. Also, I still feel like it's realistic for Alex to feel intimidated and answer John and his group if they ask him about his trait. But honestly, John isn't an asshole and we end up liking him... so I asked myself, why is John even asking Alex so insistently about his Trait? It doesn't make a lot of sense for them to know it's taboo to ask about skills and traits, but still ask a new person anyway. So, now they just don't ask him what his trait is and Alex doesn't share it with them.
Lots of other little changes (shows magical stats instead of physical and some others).
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“What the fu…”
The screen shimmered in front of Alex. The pain in his stomach began to fade, and he pushed himself up from all fours into a seated position on the grass.
“Trait manifested,” he muttered, reading the words again from the screen. “Primordial Will?”
What does that even mean? Is this real? Did I hit my head or something?
He reached out a hand to touch the screen. The tingling feeling returned as his fingers approached where the screen should be, and his fingers passed right through the blue window.
“Weird,” he said to no one.
When he withdrew his hand, the window snapped back to its perfectly still shape. As he turned his head from side to side, it followed his gaze, anchored to some invisible point in space.
“Hello? System? Can I get some more information here?”
No response.
“Information on… Primordial Will?” he tried again.
The screen stayed the same.
“Ugh, this is like trying to get a straight answer from automated tech support.” He exaggerated his words, saying, “I’d like to speak to a representative, please.”
Shit, maybe I shouldn’t say that. What if some sort of alien answers me?
What is this “System”? What is “Primordial Will”? And what the hell does this have to do with the slime or the Rift?
“Status.” he said hesitantly, remembering a term used in a few of the articles that talked about awakening.
The screen was replaced by a new one in the blink of an eye. There was no flickering or movement; the old one was simply gone, and a new one appeared.
Status
Name: Alex Moore - Level 1
Class: None
HP: 50/50
MP: 60/60
Traits: (1/3)
{Primordial Will}
Physical Stats:
Strength: 4
Agility: 5
Constitution: 5
Vitality: 6
Magical Stats:
Intellect: 6
Willpower: 3
Mana: 6
Wisdom: 6
Active Skills:
(None)
Passive Skills:
(None)
“Okay,” he said. “Now we’re getting somewhere. Voice commands seem to work, sort of like my home entertainment system.”
He stared at the screen for a few minutes, his mind trying to process all of the information.
Strength 4, Agility 5, Constitution 5, Vitality 6… Those are underwhelming. Is five average? What does that even mean in this context? Who am I being compared to? God, what does that mean about my Willpower?
"I want to see the magical stats," he said.
The screen seemed to respond to his words, expanding the Magical Stats section.
Magical Stats:
Intellect (Magical Power)
Willpower (Magical Control)
Mana (Magical Capacity)
Wisdom (Magical Regeneration)
Okay, that's a bit more helpful. But "Magical Power?" What constitutes "power"? I mean, I managed to kill that slime thing, didn't I? Do I get more power? And Intellect, what does that mean? Just, like, how smart I am?
As if reading his mind, a new window popped up.
"Well, guess I don't need to say it out loud..." he mumbled.
Intellect - Represents pure magical power, determining the raw strength of spells and magical abilities. As this stat increases, an Awakened One's spells become more potent and powerful, allowing them to perform greater feats of magic with less effort.
"Okay," he said. "So basically, it’s how much magical punch I pack." He flexed his hand, trying to feel for that magical tingling he’d felt in his stomach.
It’s a whopping 6 though… Definitely not impressive. Not even close.
Willpower is my lowest by far. What's that about Magical Control?
He intentionally directed his thoughts to try and understand more about Willpower, and the window changed again.
Willpower - Represents an Awakened One's ability to harness their determination and intent to expertly direct their magical energy. As this stat increases, spells are cast with enhanced speed and precision, allowing for more effective manipulation of magic that aligns with the caster's strong will.
Ok, maybe this is "finesse"? Intellect is more like raw power. What about Magical Capacity and Regeneration?
Mana - Reflects an Awakened One's overall magical energy reserves and endurance. Those with high Mana can cast more spells and maintain magical effects for longer periods. They can channel more magical energy without experiencing exhaustion.
Wisdom - Reflects an Awakened One’s ability to regenerate mana and their understanding of the deeper, spiritual aspects of magic. A high Wisdom stat allows for faster mana recovery, enabling one to cast spells more frequently. Awakened with high Wisdom may also display an aura of calm and insight.
His eyes drifted back to the top of the screen. "Traits: (1/3) {Primordial Will}."
So, that's what it is—a Trait, not a superpower or a skill. The two sections would suggest that there’s a difference between the two.
He frowned. He had thought that killing the slime would’ve unlocked some kind of active ability. A skill, maybe?
Did I miss something with those blue lights? Was that experience… like in a video game?
Or maybe Traits are just the foundation, and skills come later?
Focusing his attention on the Trait's name, he tried to will the System to show him more information than just the name. The blue window in front of him changed again, shrinking slightly from the expanded view of Magical Stats.
{Primordial Will} - (Weighted Stat): You are the Chosen of Zaamis. Harnessing your inner strength, your mastery of magic becomes more defined, echoing whispers from the lost Primordials. Your Free Points may only be put into Willpower.
Zaamis? That name feels... important somehow.
Stat Weights should mean my Willpower gains are stronger than normal, right? That could be useful, especially since it's tied to magical control.
He read the description again, focusing on the last line. His mouth tightened and he bit down the inside of his cheek.
"Locked into one stat, though? That's… really limiting."
He glanced back at the spot where the slime had been. It was gone, completely dissolved.
Could have been worse, I guess. At least Willpower seems useful for magic. But still—all those videos of people throwing fireballs around, and I get stat restrictions?
Did I get this Trait because I was so stubborn about killing it with a rock? Would I have gotten a better trait if I killed something tougher?
The thought almost made him laugh despite his frustration. He could barely stand. His leg was throbbing, and he was half naked, yet here he was, analyzing stat distributions like it was a game and asking if he should have tried to fight something more dangerous.
He shook his head, trying to focus on the practical implications.
This complicates things. If I do think of it like a game, since there are game-like menus and stats. Then I know that single-stat builds can be powerful, but they tended to be cheeky and were only good at their one trick. I'll need to figure out how to compensate for the other stats or else I’m screwed.
He remembered the video Mark had sent him. How the kid was shooting fireballs like some comic book hero. It had looked so effortless, so natural.
There has to be more to this. Maybe the restriction is temporary? Or maybe there are ways around it. Either way, I need to understand how this system really works.
He glanced at his watch again and realized that almost an hour had passed since he entered, and if he wanted to get out of here without running into others, he needed to get moving.
He groaned in annoyance as he stood up, his legs shaking slightly under his weight and he knew that he’d be sore the next day. In a huff, he scooped up his pants from where they lay, careful in case there was any slime-goo stuck on them.
“Great,” he muttered. He lifted up his pants to see a gaping hole staring back at him. It was an odd shape, but there was clearly a gap in the lower leg, right where the slime decided to get friendly.
He shuddered.
Whatever that thing is made of, it didn’t agree with my slacks. So… no pants or shredded pants? Decisions, decisions.
“Shredded pants, it is,” he sighed and shook them out at full arms length, doing his best to knock off the last of the slime’s remnants. He pulled them on and thankfully, the belt held... even with the new ventilation system.
His gaze dropped to what was left of his right shoe. The once-tan leather was gone, reduced to a sad, melted puddle around the rubber sole.
He wrinkled his nose. Leaving the ruined shoe behind, he limped back toward the portal. He winced as the left over fabric from the pant leg brushed against his burned leg. Stopping, he carefully rolled up the tattered cloth, rolling it tight and high on his thigh.
Looking down at his leg, he thought about how he was going to handle getting it treated. It would be an awkward conversation at the hospital.
Do I just tell them I burned it? Spilt chemicals on it or something?
A blue screen popped into his vision unbidden which caused Alex flinch out of reflex. He scanned the written words before grumbling and swishing his hand in the air to make the screen vanish.
Personal Quest: Culling the Forest Kill 20 Creatures.
Rift Quest: Defending the Meadow As waves spawn during the red moon, protect the meadow from being overwhelmed.
I honestly don’t even want to think about that right now. My head is pounding, and my leg hurts. The adrenaline must be wearing off.
Fuck.
Seeing that the first line said something about killing 20 monsters made Alex want to laugh out loud at his pathetic state. He’d struggled against a slime and barely come out on top of that fight. What other, scarier creatures did the forest have lurking within?
Now that he was thinking a bit more clearly, Alex found it odd to note that he could feel a sort of pulling from his stomach toward the portal ahead of him. It was almost like the Rift was calling to his body.
The portal loomed closer as he walked on. The blue light of the portal and the orange and pink light from the setting sun mixed and created a stunning visual. It was mesmerizing, but he couldn’t bring himself to appreciate it in that moment.
Awakening.
They made it sound so cool in those articles. Like winning the lottery, but instead, I feel like I just got handed a participation trophy.
Primordial Will. What a joke. I don’t even have the will or confidence to stand up to my own family. Maybe this is the universe saying that I desperately need more…
He could already hear Mark’s laughter. His friend would try to make it a compliment or something that had an upside rather than the negative it appeared to be.
His socked foot found a rock, causing him to hiss and then suck in a breath through his teeth.
Gritting his teeth, he did his best not to limp anymore as he approached the portal.
The swirling blue portal shimmered, a one-way ticket back to… well, not normalcy. He didn’t think that anything would ever be normal again, after this. But at least back to familiar misery.
As he got closer, movement at the portal caught his eye. The surface shimmered and then rippled out from the center as if a rock were dropped in the middle of a pond. Five figures emerged, their forms rippling before solidifying. They strode through the portal with purpose and fanned out in a practiced manner that spoke to their experience.
One of them, a woman with red hair pulled back in a tight braid, made eye contact with him. Her gaze swept over him and lingered for a moment on his barefoot and the shredded remains of his pants. She said something to the group in a quick, clipped tone that he couldn't quite hear. Several of them glanced in his direction clearly assessing him.
He stood frozen, unsure of what to do. His hand instinctively went to the jacket tied around his waist. Untying it, he held it in his hands nervously.
Should I say something? Should I wave? Maybe they’re friendly?
The thought felt absurd the moment it entered his mind.
Friendly? Who comes to another dimension armed to the teeth with-
His thoughts stuttered for a moment.
Wait, what? Swords and spears?
The man in the center of the group took a step forward. He was dressed in cargo pants and a dark T-shirt, like he was out for an evening hike. The only thing that seemed out of place was the spear, which caught both the setting sunlight and Alex’s eye repeatedly.
A weapon. Of course. Why didn't I think of that? Wait, why not a gun? That would make things a lot easier, wouldn't it?
Yeah, okay, Alex. You've never even held a gun before.
Alright, asshole-me. I’ve never killed anything before today, either.
"Hey there!" the man called out with a smile. "Rough day?" He gestured toward Alex's leg.
"You could say that," Alex replied, attempting to match the men's casual tone. He scratched the back of his head and looked down at his own state.
"You alone out here?" The men stopped a few feet away and surveyed the area behind Alex. His stance was relaxed, but he looked ready to move at a moment's notice.
Alex glanced nervously around at the group. "Oh, um—yeah, just me. I was actually just heading out."
The spearman relaxed slightly. "No worries, there have just been some rumors circulating about people setting up ambushes just inside the entrance of a Rift. We don't normally have to deal with that, but we thought we were the first ones here. You mind if we ask a few questions before you head out? Always good to know what we're walking into." He shifted his weight, and Alex could visibly see his grip on the spear relax. "I'm John, by the way. John Riley."
Alex nodded and shook his hand. "Sure, what do you need to know?"
"What kind of monsters are you looking at in here?"
"I didn't go that far into the portal," Alex said, pointing toward the tree line. "There was a slime monster over there. That's what I fought."
"Slime?" The red-haired woman stepped forward, and her eyes drifted back down to his injured leg. "The burn looks pretty nasty. It's going to get worse if you don't get it treated. I might be able to help you with that."
"That obvious, huh? I guess the half-missing pant leg makes it a bit obvious." Alex gestured at his leg and clamped his mouth shut, realizing he was about to start blabbering out of nervousness.
Tara approached and knelt down in front of him, setting her own spear on the ground. "May I?"
Alex nodded, and she held her hands over the acidic burn. There was a moment of silence as the wind picked up. He saw her brows come together as if she were focusing deeply, but there was no outward change or visible indication that she had done anything when she stood up. But almost immediately, the burning sensation in his leg dulled to a manageable ache.
"It's not healing magic, if that's what you're thinking. Those skills are really rare right now," she explained. "But this will boost your vitality for the next twenty-four hours. It should help you recover faster. You'll still need to treat the wound carefully, but it should be healed in a day or two now instead of a week or two."
Alex's eyes widened slightly as he heard the last sentence. "Thanks," Alex said gratefully. "It feels better already."
“No problem. I’m Tara, by the way,” she said as she moved back to her position in the groups formation.
John leaned on his spear. "First time in a Rift?"
"Is that obvious too?"
"We all started somewhere," John chuckled. "Most of us brought weapons with us."
"Yeah, well, I wasn't exactly planning on fighting anything today." Alex glanced down at his watch and then at the portal. "What's it like out there? Is the government out there?"
"Nah, though it shouldn't be much longer now. Local law enforcement has a perimeter set up," John confirmed. "Mostly just there to keep the press back. You shouldn't have any trouble getting through. They're more focused on keeping people from coming in than going out."
One of the men behind John spoke up. "The media's having a field day with this one. I don't think we've had one this big in the city before. I don't see how they’ll be able to stop this one from getting on the news."
"Speaking of which," John reached into his pocket and pulled out a business card. "Here. We're with the Adventurers' Guild. We're just recruits, but we've cleared several personal quests now and even got to participate in closing the Rift."
Alex took the card and read the simple black text. It had John's name and number on there, but not much else. "The Adventurers' Guild?"
"Yeah, we're organizing teams to handle these Rifts. It's dangerous going solo," John glanced at Alex's leg pointedly. "As you've probably figured out."
"Fair point." Alex tucked the card into his pocket. "Thanks."
"A word of advice?" John grew slightly more serious. "Whatever trait you got out there? Keep it close to your chest. Information is valuable, especially now. Lots of people are trying to figure out how all this works."
Alex saw several of the people behind John nod in agreement. He nodded along with them, appreciating the warning. "Noted. And thanks for helping with my leg."
"No problem," the woman named Tara smiled and waved to him. "Just be careful out there."
"Right." John stepped to the side and cleared a path for Alex to the portal. "Good luck, man. Give me a call if you're interested in learning more about the Guild. We could always use more people."
I wonder if they'd still extend the invite if they knew about my trait.
Alex headed toward the portal, putting his jacket on. Behind him, he could hear the group discussing strategy, and their voices began to fade as he approached the swirling, glue-like surface.
A Guild of monster hunters. Because that's not totally insane to think about.
He reached out and touched the portal's surface and felt a pull in his gut and the weight of his body begin to lessen.
His socked foot found the pavement, and the sudden shift from grass to concrete made him wince. He shielded his eyes, blinking against the sudden noise and light.
It took several seconds for him to adjust just to the real world again. The cascade of noises and chaos of the city disoriented him briefly.
Within a few heartbeats, gravity reasserted itself, and Alex braced his legs to prevent himself from almost falling as he had when he entered the Rift.
"Hey, someone came out!" A voice cut through the general murmur.
"Over here! Look this way!" Another voice called.
"Step away from the light. Let us see you!"
Alex blinked, shading his eyes with his hand. He saw a small crowd of bodies contained behind a police barricade, some distance from the portal. He took a half step backward as he realized some people had cameras out.
"What was it like?"
"Did you see any monsters?"
"Are you an Awakened now?"
The questions came at him rapid-fire, and as he saw the police officers, who had their backs turned, slowly turn back to look at the commotion, he felt his pulse quicken.
I need to get out of here.
His eyes darted back and forth, searching for an escape route. He hunched his shoulders and pulled his jacket collar up over his head. To his right, a group of police officers began to make their way toward him.
He turned and ran, giving it no more thought. He ignored the shouts of protest from behind the barricade and pushed his way through a small group of people gathered on the backside of the portal, catching an officer completely off guard.
"Hey, get back here!"
"Stop him!"
His sock-covered foot scraped against the pavement, sending a jolt of pain up his leg, but he ignored it. Pushing himself harder, he breathed heavily and felt the muscles in his legs begin to burn once again. Soon, the shouts of the crowd faded behind him as he weaved between abandoned cars.
Alex didn't look back. He just kept running, his one good dress shoe pounding against the pavement.
The reporters question from the crowd rang through his head.
Awakened. That’s what I am now.
His leg throbbed the further he ran, as the adrenaline wore off and the pain was only suppressed by Tara’s magic. He had so many questions and he knew that he just needed to put more distance between himself and the portal.
And I’ve got to figure out how to explain to Henderson why I missed the second half of the work day.
A bitter laugh burst from him as he slowed down. He’d just stepped through a portal to another dimension, fought a monster, and gotten access to a magical system.
Somehow, he felt like his monotonous, ordinary life had just become anything but.
Comments
OverXelous
Great catch, thank you!!
Cary Edens
You have this paragraph twice: "The man in the center of the group took a step forward. He was dressed in cargo pants and a dark T-shirt, like he was out for an evening hike. The only thing that seemed out of place was the spear, which caught both the setting sunlight and Alex’s eye repeatedly."
