Kevin Curry
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Courtly Chronicles 2: Crazy like a fox
🕑 Added 2022-02-01 22:40:53 +0000 UTCFor reference, the first chapter:
[Tanya Degurechaff von Goethe aka Tenya Deguchiya aka Archduchess von Goethe, circa 1923, age 9]
Tanya wished that they had paid more attention to pre-quirk history. While they certainly remembered enough to pass any tests, dates of important events for instance, it wasn’t really something heavily studied below the college level, and of the dozens of subjects they had studied for fun and quirk training, pre-quirk history never really made the list. There was enough post-quirk history to study for anything useful about human nature, after all.
It was bad news when courses of xenology, a purely theoretical field given that they hadn’t met any aliens, were more useful for understanding Tanya’s current situation than any actual history lesson. Sociology and Psychology lifted even more weight, but when you’re in alternate Europe where World War I didn’t happen yet, and there were less than half of the number of countries on the map, dates meant, more or less, absolutely nothing.
The fact that thousands of people in the world all had Mathemagician meant that Tanya’s biggest advantage from Past Life Recall, their hero training, was not nearly as large of an edge as it would be even if Tanya was reincarnated within their original world, quirks and all.
Magic was detectable, it was understood, and even if they required those ‘computational orbs’ to make effects, the technology was new and already quite impressive. Applying industrial scales to Mathemagician… It was a terrifying thing to contemplate.
That said, there was one essential advantage to that arrangement: It meant that Tanya was more valuable in an R&D capacity, learning the computation orb’s language and improving the software of their spells. Even those who thought Tanya a delusional little girl could acknowledge results, after all.
“Tanya.” Barked the Archduke as he entered the Imperial Palace’s library. The librarian gave the man a dirty look, but limited herself to that as a concession to the man’s rank. Archduke Franz von Goethe was an odious man, pious enough to adopt a little girl when guilted by a nun who thought him responsible for the death of a prospective parent, but otherwise concerned primarily with the study of magic as a science, a typical theoretician who disdained the practicalities of application. Tanya occasionally wondered how his parenting would impact an actual little girl, but leaving most aspects of it to a governess wasn’t the worst parenting possible, and he wouldn’t have adopted one without Tanya’s quirk forcing the meeting so it was pointless to speculate. Once the man had approached Tanya’s table closely enough to speak at a normal volume, he continued: “You need to stop avoiding the Princess. It’s unseemly for someone of your status.”
From the Archduke’s tone, Tanya surmised that he was primarily annoyed at having to be pulled from his research to do something resembling parenting. “I’m not avoiding her.” Tanya lied. “I’m not that difficult to find, if she wishes to discuss matters with me, there are plentiful communication channels in which she could transmit that desire.”
The court magician scowled at the response. “How you can be in court for three years and not comprehend how royalty works is beyond my understanding.” He growled out. “She does not come to you. You go to her and charm and socialize and whatever else noblewomen do because she is of higher status. Is that direct enough for you?” Tanya suppressed the urge to scowl back. They hated the whole ‘noble’ concept, it was too close to quirk supremacist logic for Tanya to tolerate. It wasn’t so bad when Tanya could pretend that it was just a matter of the separation between those with wealth and those without, but that didn’t help much when dealing with Princess Alexandrine. She was a bossy spoiled brat who let her royal status go to her head. Worse, Tanya was in no position to affect any positive change in her behavior. It was a problem that Tanya was ill-used to resolve.
“Yes.” Tanya replied simply, before turning to her attendant, a fourteen year old girl that was the daughter of one of the other palace maids. “Monika, please find out the Princess’s schedule so I can properly ambush her with a charm offensive.” Tanya gave a dry grin to their ‘father’, who scowled deeper at the wording. Monika, for her part, eagerly bowed in the way Tanya had taught her, appropriate for a subordinate to their employer, before leaving more or less silently. Tanya approved of her diligence and dedication to her job, even if the reincarnate had to swallow their anger at the waste of potential. That kind of diligence at that age should be spent in education!
Still, the Archduke completed his task, so he issued some parting words before leaving: “Remember, you’re only here because you’re useful. Don’t become more trouble than you’re worth.”
Tanya sighed after the library doors closed once more. The worst part of the monarchy was that the Kaiser was actually a decent ruler. Sure, his orders to prepare to invade Legadonia in response to the border skirmish was probably going to start World War 1, but seeing as how he managed to keep it at bay for a decade diplomatically while doing a military buildup in an economically sensible manner, Tanya was willing to give the man some credit.
It was still an unstable system that was doomed to fail, though. Now, back to designing the alterations to the mage training curriculum. Their flight methods were just atrocious, and the training needed to be completely re-done in order to take advantage of the improved flight formula Tanya managed to program. Computation orb programming was an interesting field, honestly. The math parts were the same as in their first life, but creating a user interface that allowed for the mages to use those calculations in a useful way was completely novel.
That was ignoring the parts where they had mages teaching the other mages, but utterly failed to take advantage of magic as a teaching aid. Illusions could create maneuvering tests, like Hawks used his feathers back when Tanya was working for him. Mage barriers were able to be created at specific durabilities, and could be used to protect something significantly distant from the orb in question, which allowed for anti-mage training by creating test barriers as well as training to tear apart regular armor with simulated specifications.
“Hey Momo, Do you think seven tiers of durability for testing purposes is too many?” Tenya said as he turned to… no one.
Tanya pushed their work away, ashen faced as they frantically searched the area for any witnesses for their lapse. Seeing only a librarian far too distant to have full information, Tanya gathered the materials and left the vast library. “Some air will do me good, yes. A bit of flying, some target practice maybe. Have to keep sharp if the war reaches the palace, after all.” Tanya indicated to the librarian that they intended to return later so Monika would know to wait before leaving.
If the librarian noticed anything strange about Tanya’s demeanor, she kept it to herself.
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Tanya knew that they were being unfair to the Princess. She had some kind of developmental disorder, probably from all of the inbreeding, although it was never a topic they had ever studied, so narrowing down a diagnosis was beyond them. But it didn’t make the young girl pleasant company, so Tanya just pretended the eight year old was instead five. It made her tantrums and lack of decorum more tolerable.
The current task was a tea party, with several other young noblewomen, including the much more agreeable and actual five year old Princess Cecile. Servants made sure there were plenty of small cakes and tea available for all, while the group complained about their tutors and gossiped about the girls that weren’t present.
“So that’s why you won’t see Marie for a while.” Finished Ina, one of the older girls at the table at eleven. Tanya just focused on trying to hide their absolute boredom.
Princess Alexandrine, or “Adini” to those who she liked, clapped her hands at the story. “That’s a funny story!” She exclaimed. Turning to Tanya, she pointed imperiously. “Show us some magic.” She ordered.
Tanya suppressed the urge to sigh as they complied with the royal command. Moving their hands to create some flourish, the plates on the table all floated upwards as tiny barriers lifted them. One by one, they started to move along a pre-plotted course, a trick that Tanya learned when experimenting with computation orbs. Each one floated past each member of the table, allowing them to take one of the pastries if they so desired.
The collected young girls were appropriately impressed by the parlor trick, as after each plate was set back down, Tanya floated into the air themselves and used a flourish of a ring of light to transition the relatively simple gown for an everyday occasion into an illusion that was appropriate for a full ball. Abbreviated magical girl transformation complete, Tanya posed on a mirrored barrier, creating a magical circle in the air behind them, although unlike computation orbs, it was merely aesthetic. Computation orbs had decently high but limited throughput, approximately one hundred motes per second by Tanya’s reckoning (although the official measure was in kilo-thaums, the type 13 that Tanya had for certain useful functions like mana scanning could output two hundred kt per minute), so they used the circles to stockpile stable mana for long enough to allow powerful formulas to accumulate the necessary mana to properly execute, basically a magical loading bar. That habit also influenced all forms of user interface for scanning spells, so displays tended to be circular and have such flourishes included.
After the applause died down, Tanya descended the barrier and let all of the illusions dissipate before taking a deep bow, appropriate to an entertainer. “Thank you, thank you.” Tanya said. “Any other requests, Princess?”
Princess Cecile spoke up instead of her sister, shouting, really: “I want another story!” Ah. Last week Tanya had come across the young princess when she was in the garden, learning how to tolerate boredom. That wasn’t how her nursemaid put it, but the girl clearly wanted to play in the dirt like most children rather than passively enjoy the flowers by looking like a refined lady was supposed to. Having nothing better to do and remembering the Archduke’s edict on sucking up to the royals at every opportunity, Tanya decided to put on an impromptu puppet show like they did for Nezumi and Soki at that age. Translating the story of All Might into something she’d understand was a bit tricky, but it was done.
Tanya assessed the rest of the table for interest, particularly the mercurial Alexandrine. “Story?” the princess asked. “She told you stories? She’s my friend, not yours!” The other ladies around the table winced, but politely refrained from bringing attention to the princess’s breach of decorum. She pointed to Tanya: “Tell me the story.”
“Of course, Princess.” The rest of the table didn’t seem particularly invested in it, knowing that it was probably something only entertaining to a five year old, but adjusted their seats to get a more comfortable view anyway. Manifesting the blank hand puppet illusion, interest was immediately spiked by the table. “This story takes place in a magical land called Nippon.” A puppet stage manifested, using old Japanese architecture as a theme and concealing Tanya’s exact position. Applying the sound formula to reclaim their old voice, Tanya continued: “Spirits wander the land, partnering with children and allowing them to use their special gifts. These were dark times for Nippon, as the people grew fearful of what they did not understand.” A few villainous puppets were brought out, launching little bolts of fire, lasers, and throwing illusory rocks around the illusory stage. “Many of those children grew up hated by all, and decided to hate the world right back.”
Tanya remembered the last time someone saw them do one of these back in his first life. Kirishima questioned why they bothered with the stylized hand puppet illusions when it would have been a simple matter to make it as high fidelity as a live action film. The reason was simple: Nezumi liked the hand puppets Momo made more than the realistic ones when she was growing up, so Tanya just made illusory copies of them. It had the secondary benefit of allowing violent events by using puppet slapstick rather than glossing it over altogether.
Still, as Tanya continued with a heavily simplified story of how All Might created an era of peace with the power of his mighty fists and mightier heart, the children were predictably awed, despite the story not including any romance like one would expect for a story issued to girls. That kind of thing could be saved for another day.
“...and for the rest of his life and even beyond, all were inspired with bravery just by him announcing his presence.” One big advantage of doing an alteration of their voice to imitate the old one is that Tanya just needed to layer the same modifications they used in their first life to imitate the same voices. “Hahahaha! There is no need to fear, for I am Here.” As a final flourish, Tanya displayed All Might in his full glory instead of as a puppet.
[i]”Within your chest, beats the heart of a true hero.”[/i] Tanya lost concentration on the illusion, winking out in a way that Tanya immediately pretended was on purpose, blinking away the sudden tears. Damn flashbacks. Not even using the same heart.
The girls appreciated the ending, applauding enthusiastically rather than the polite applause the previous parlor trick had. Tanya went back to sit in their seat, re-heating the tea before sipping, then wincing and cooling it back down to the level Momo preferred before emptying it, stoically ignoring the burns that were just inflicted on their tongue with the pain relieving formula, setting the type 13 on their collar towards maintaining it rather than doing it personally. With that problem handled, Tanya refilled their tea and drank it once more. Not the same tongue, either.
Still, it wasn’t exactly Tanya’s first tea party, so they managed to get through the rest without offending either princess, which was really the best they could hope for, given the circumstances.
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Unsurprisingly, the Dean of Magic at the Imperial War College was resistant to the new curriculum Tanya proposed to him.
“This is the last time to be testing some experimental doctrine.” Colonel Matthaus Baumann, the Dean in question, argued.
“It’s the perfect time.” Tanya retorted. “The magical conscription has begun already, as the Empire seeks to expand their mage forces in light of this new conflict. You have large swathes of your forces which can use the new methods rather than trying to poorly imitate planes.” Tanya gestured to the diagrams they prepared. “Dodging firearms has always been about making it difficult to aim, and given the distances involved even small amounts of variability would make it impossible to accurately assess the position of the mage forces and instead force them to just shoot blindly in the hopes of hitting their barriers.” Pointing to the comparisons of turning radius given the methods, Tanya emphasized their last point: “And you cannot tell me you don’t see the benefits of a tighter turning radius.”
“Theoretically.” Retorted the academic.
“Time-tested with forty years of refinement.” Tanya snapped back. “You clearly aren’t completely disbelieving of my quirk, or else we wouldn’t be here today.” Tanya summoned a miniaturized image of Argent Silver, with the logo and high-tech helmet removed, sending the image through one of his practice routines to showcase the proposed maneuvering. “Flight formulas work on principles of momentum alone, not aerodynamics. Teaching mages to fly based on the latter is a good way to get them shot.” The computation orbs could handle the reinforcement adjustments necessary for the mage to survive the G-forces without wasting too much mana, it was just a matter of better programming, which Tanya was providing.
“Now, Colonel, Tanya.” Said General Zettour gently, as if scolding children. Tanya twitched at the address, but Zettour was one of the few people who treated Tanya as an adult, so remained silent. “I have a way we could resolve this. I could call in a few mages from the unoccupied Southern Army and have a test exercise.” That was perfectly reasonable, but fighting people was something Tanya had so far managed to avoid, so scowled at the thought of breaking that streak.
“What sort of exercise?” Tanya said after a beat. “While I’m confident I could win any fair contest against anyone you could name when it comes to magic, we’ll need something to prove the quality of my doctrine, rather than my own personal skills.”
The Dean snorted at Tanya’s boast. “As much as I would love to see the brat’s bluff being called, she’s right. Mages fly in the open sky, it’s not like an obstacle course would be a reasonable measure.”
General Zettour did not immediately speak, which Tanya assumed was because he didn’t have anything in mind. Fortunately, the reliable Major Lergen noticed the issue and spoke up: “Ah, there’s an exercise I was going to audit tomorrow that includes some anti-air guns, meant to train the gunners instead of the mages. We could give them a bit more of a challenge by using fully trained mages, perhaps?”
A moment passed while the General, Colonel, and Tanya digested the plan. “Acceptable.” The Dean said first.
“What do you use to keep the mages safe, anyway?” Tanya asked. The specifics weren’t relevant when Tanya was making the training plan, but when one was going under fire themselves? That was critical, need-to-know information.
Colonel Baumann snorted at Tanya’s ignorance and/or cowardice. “The training bullets are enchanted to reinforce barriers they hit.”
Wait, you could do that? “I’m fine with it then.” Tanya made a mental note to use the computation orb for the barrier, just in case. Less reliant on their own concentration that way, and removes the question of compatibility problems.
“It looks like we have a plan, then.” General Zettour said. “I’ll call in some veteran gunners and mages from the Southern Army and the Imperial Navy, and we’ll run the exercise. If Tanya’s more complicated flight formula and skills provide a notable improvement, we’ll change the mage curriculum accordingly.” He paused. “You mentioned in your presentation that implementation would require we program the new formulas into the orb. Will that be a problem?”
Tanya shook their head, tapping their computation orb. “The one I have here has all of my custom programs, don’t worry about that for the test.” It was slightly modified to be able to store additional software, in fact, but to fit it some of the protective casing had to be removed, so it wasn’t exactly fit for combat. “If I had a spare one, I could install the new program in about an hour and a half.” The computation orbs had atrocious development tools, which were even worse if you wanted to update them, most programs were solely installed on manufacture, but it’s not like it was something only Tanya could do, doing it for everyone who got the training on the new methods wouldn’t be a big deal. “Maybe more, if there’s some unforeseen programming error. Once the kinks get worked out on the process, mass updates should take as low as forty minutes each.” The Archduke was very stingy with his orb supply for experimental software builds. Tanya only had access to the one, so they weren’t 100% sure there wasn’t going to be a need for some debugging once the new flight modules were installed on factory standard hardware. Tanya never thought that their programming knowledge would be useful in the early to mid 20th century, but as it turned out it was their second most valuable skill, behind their quirk training.
“That’s fast.” General Zettour replied, impressed, reminding Tanya that he didn’t have any frame of reference for how fast computers could be. “But I’m sure the good Colonel could get you a spare orb for you to… program, you said? Before the day is out.” Colonel Baumann grunted in agreement before pointing at one of his subordinates, who promptly left to retrieve one.
Still, if a competition is involved, some sportsmanship wouldn’t be amiss. “May the best method win, Colonel.”
“It will.” Was his haughty reply.
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“Where on Earth did you find someone who could make a uniform that fits me?” Tanya asked the conscript that had delivered it.
The girl nervously replied: “I made it, ma’am.” After a moment of Tanya staring incredulously, she elaborated: “I’ve been helping the other recruits by mending uniforms, and the teachers noticed. Yesterday they gave me your measurements” Was this Monika’s fault? Tanya was thinking she was responsible, if the girl had Tanya’s measurements. A warning glance to the attendant confirmed their culpability. “-and told me to alter one of the small uniforms to fit.” Well, at least they gave the girl quality thread for the task, given how a quick tug with a reinforcement formula didn’t rip it.
“Well, if today goes well, your flight curriculum will be much improved, so look forward to that.” Tanya said as she got dressed. While the War College doesn’t admit conscripts, as it was an officer training academy, there was a nearby training base where those officers could get experience leading recruits. Naturally, this included the mages.
“Oh? Well, that’s nice.” The girl whom Tanya realized they didn’t know the name of replied. “I’m stronger than half of the other recruits, farm life, I’m sure you understand,” They do, but given that they were nominally an Archduchess that wasn’t exactly a safe bet. “-but I’m really struggling with the math parts.”
“What parts give you trouble?” Tanya asked as they finished with the belt of the Imperial Mage flight suit.
Before the girl could reply, Colonel Baumann’s voice rang out haughtily: “A real Imperial Mage would be ready for action by now, civilian.”
Walking out immediately, Tanya put that expensive bantering education to good use: “And a real noblewoman would still be removing their makeup by now, so let’s all be glad that I’m neither.” The Colonel startled, probably still unused to speaking to people outside of the chain of command.
Major Lergen cleared his throat. “The exercise is currently ongoing. In about thirty minutes, we’ll begin the contest; Lieutenant Weiss leads the Wing we’ve brought from the Southern Army and will be the one who briefs you on your… ‘mission’”.
“Very well. Where is he?” Tanya asked, seeing no Lieutenants around.
A low-ranking aerial mage saluted. “Follow me, ma’am.” Ah, efficiency. Something sorely missed in the Imperial Palace, but found in spades in the Empire’s war apparatus. That really isn’t a good thing, but monarchy is a giant mess, so it is to be expected. Government’s most efficient sections are always the parts that help ensure that it remains in power. In Japan, it was the HPSC. In The Empire? The Army. When the communists took over China? The Ministry of State Security. From all reports, the communist Russy Federation is the same with the Commissariat.
Eventually, Tanya found in front of them a severe man with brown hair, with the appropriate rank insignias for Tanya to guess this to be the officer in question. He seemed to stare at Tanya, confusion apparent on his features. “You would be Lieutenant Weiss?” Tanya asked.
Luckily, being addressed with rank snapped him out of his funk and he sharply saluted. “Yes ma’am!”
“Right.” Tanya floated up to his eye level and manifested the Argent Silver illusion as armor, keeping the helmet but still leaving out the logo, as it would not be appropriate to show a war medal that was completely made up and held a striking similarity to one of the greatest ones the Empire had. With their old voice, Tanya continued, causing the soldier to have to look up at their gaze: “Colonel Baumann is being stubborn, so we will be competing today. I will need a briefing on the rules.”
A moment of silence passed. Eventually, Lieutenant Weiss managed to recover his composure and pretend that the intimidating man in front of him had always been present. “Well, first you go over there,” The soldier waved vaguely into the distance. “-with me, and then all of us go through the anti-air guns over the three kilometers of the course, trying to avoid getting hit, and once we get to the end, our orb recordings will determine how many times our barriers got hit.”
Tanya nodded decisively. “Understood. Lead the way.” At that, Lieutenant Weiss lifted off and started accelerating in the direction he previously indicated. Tanya, so as to not ruffle any feathers, used the Type 13 to copy the man’s trajectory. Despite the primitive understanding of propulsion-based flight that the old formulas indicated, there weren't any real advantages when it came to just going from point A to point B with the new versions. A few optimizations, improvements to the brakes, faster acceleration, all of these things and more, but in the end, 80% of the formula’s mana budget was just thrust. No amount of math was going to find savings there.
Halfway through the trip, Tanya decided to drop the illusion. While endurance wasn’t really a concern, as merely breathing in this world was enough to respire motes at a significant rate, there was a drop-off of effectiveness when splitting focus between the orb and regular quirk use, and performance was paramount if Tanya wanted the respect of having made a real improvement to the Empire’s military apparatus.
After all, there was a large gulf between being a capable illusionist that performs for royalty, and someone who used that extensive magical knowledge to contribute to the country in a tangible way. Tanya intended to be the latter as soon as possible.
The start point was at the training camp, where the mages that were presumably the other competitors were fielding questions from the trainees that had spent the last while doing the same thing they were about to. It reminded Tanya of seeing young hero trainees, actually. The earnest expressions of admiration, seeing strength embodied and knowing that they worked to match that power.
Of course, the fact that there were a few faces that were definitely younger than even first year hero students in that crowd soured the whole thing.
“Well I remember when we were using the old Type 9, “ Began one of them in response to a question as Tanya tuned a sound formula to eavesdrop. “-the switch to the 13 was back about four years ago. It only managed one-forty kt, so we were pretty slow in comparison to what we get today, mm-hmm. Must have been half the speed at the most. We still put the boots to the tribals in the Congo, mind you, but against some of the planes and guns the boys are putting out now? We’d have been sitting ducks.“
Tanya felt it a good time to cut in, before this could get any more bigoted. “And yet, technology marches on. Let’s see if we can’t take a few more steps forward today, shall we?”
The soldiers, having been startled by an unfamiliar voice, immediately saluted reflexively before noticing Tanya float down next to their commanding officer. Lieutenant Weiss spoke now that they were standing at attention. “Men, our mission is simple: test our skills against the experimental doctrine that the Archduchess will demonstrate alongside us. You’ve all done this exercise before, minimize the impacts of the AA guns. We’ll leave at 1300 on the dot.” He fetched a pocket watch from his coat and checked it. “We have twelve minutes to get ready. Any questions?”
“How old are you?” One of the soldiers immediately asked Tanya.
Tanya glanced at Lieutenant Weiss to determine how much of a stickler for protocol he was. Seeing no trace of aggravation, Tanya accepted the informality and replied: “Sixty-three.”
“Bullshit.” the soldier replied. “If your flying is so great, why aren’t we already using it if you’re so old?”
“Time travel.” Tanya replied blandly. “You fly like planes when you should be flying more like helicopters or zero-G rigs.” The soldiers blankly stared at the unusual terms. “Neither of which are even invented yet, so it’s an understandable mistake.” No television, no computer games, board games are all terrible, war games are meant for realism above all rather than enjoyable play… the 20th century sucks.
Another of the soldiers looked at Lieutenant Weiss. “Is she serious?”
Lieutenant Weiss shrugged. “Time travel is outside the scope of the exercise.” In other words, no one told him anything. He glanced back at his watch.
“She’s making up words, you suckers.” snarked another of the mages. “It’s a con. Just kick her ass in the sky and she’ll shut up.” An unfortunately common sentiment.
“If that’s what you youngsters want to think, I’m not going to stop you.” Tanya said dryly. “Future knowledge isn’t all it's cracked up to be, anyway. According to my history books, the war that’s starting now ended years ago, after all. Started in a completely different way, too.” Tanya started doing their stretches, limbering up for the physical activity that was tolerating the G-forces of flight.
One of the soldiers managed to work up the courage to ask the question Tanya was expecting: “Did we win?”
Tanya replied, after mentally counting down the seconds along with Lieutenant Weiss, with their most savage violent maniac grin: “No.”
“Move it!” The officer shouted, and all the mages, to their credit, immediately flew off in the indicated direction, with Tanya having only the slightest of leads on them due to leaving before Weiss spoke.
As the mages flew, Tanya kept an eye on how the simplistic doctrine was executed in practice. They did alter their elevation, and did juke from side to side, which helped a lot, but the pace of the changes were achingly slow to Tanya’s experienced eyes. Tanya flitted through and around their rough formation, applying the extra force vectors completely independently to the forward thrust to demonstrate the most obvious trick that one could do.
After about two minutes of travel, the anti-air batteries opened fire. Tanya resisted the urge to draw on additional power, instead allowing the steady flow of it into the computation orb as they ducked, juked, and twirled, keeping an eye on the firing arcs of each gun. Tanya easily avoided all of the ones that weren’t directly tracking the path they traced through the sky, and the ones that were gave up to track one of the less nimble targets in short order.
Eventually, the exercise was over and the illusory display indicated the score. “Of the seventeen targets, four took enough hits to be considered casualties.” As the pretty radio operator talked, the four mages that already knew their performance winced. “On the plus side, three managed zero hits.”
Major Lergen hummed. “And the Archduchess?”
“Zero hits, sir.” The operator replied.
The Major turned to Lieutenant Weiss. “And what was your impression of her flying?”
Weiss immediately replied: “Like a dancing fairy.” Tanya smiled at the compliment.
“If you were tasked to defeat her in a dogfight?” Lergen questioned.
“I’d ask how many men I could bring.” Weiss glibly replied, the implication clear on his thoughts vis a vis a one on one confrontation.
Lergen glanced at the other mages, still standing at attention. “Do you disagree, Second Lieutenant?” The soldier in question paled as he schooled his features from the glower he had previously.
“Permission to speak freely!” Shouted the soldier.
“Granted.” Major Lergen said easily.
“There’s more to dogfights than dodging, sir!” Said the man who couldn’t be older than twenty. It was almost cute. “No amount of fancy movement is going to help if you can’t shoot straight when you’re doing it!”
“Oh?” Tanya said with a crooked smile. “Do you doubt my skills, Second Lieutenant? You should know that when quirks-” Tanya paused before correcting course. “-magic enters the equation, size doesn’t matter. No computation orb can withstand the full power even a B-ranked mage can bring to bear, so even if there was a magic power difference, it would only matter if you could use magic without one.”
“Magic requires quick thinking, math, and multitasking skills to manage your output!” The dead man argued. “Women will always be behind in that.”
Tanya scowled. Of all the ignorant, sexist nonsense he could have used…
Tanya found themselves glancing around for Nezumi, ready to hold her back from murdering the… oh. Right. Well, someone has to do it. “Major Lergen, how much medical leave would be an acceptable amount of damage for one of these exercises?”
The officer paled at the menace in Tanya’s tone. “The exercise is over, so none.” Thank you Lergen, for taking over Tanya’s usual duty.
“...I suppose as long as the Colonel institutes my curriculum, teaching one snot-nosed punk a lesson in manners isn’t necessary.” Tanya said after a moment of glaring at the aforementioned punk. Hopefully he’ll have learned his lesson in not taunting dangerous people, even if that’s hardly an ideal lesson. Chipping away at his conviction in his sexism is a good start in changing his actual opinions, after all.
“Yes. That would be for the best.” Major Lergen said quickly in agreement. “Now, from what I’ve seen, your methodology does seem to be an improvement.”
“Of course.” Tanya said. “Teaching these new techniques will have a positive impact on their ability to avoid anti-air screens and succeed in dogfights, I swear it.” Monika silently handed Tanya their customized computation orb. “Now, I believe we should meet with the Colonel to finalize the results of the exercise.”
At the Major’s nod of assent, the sexist soldiers were left behind without resorting to violence. An ending all could enjoy.
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[Tanya Degurechaff von Goethe aka Tenya Deguchiya aka Archduchess von Goethe, circa 1924, age 9]
“Welcome, zygotes.” Tanya said to their first students at the newly minted training program for mages. “Each of you thinks of yourself as a combat mage, just because you can press a few buttons with your soul and get some barriers and knives from the fancy pocket watches you get issued.” Tanya floated into the air. “In this world, the only combat mages worth the name are Aerial Mages, who dance with death in the skies of the battlefield. You will be the first soldiers who will be trained on this new, superior method of flight, and the most promising of you will be tapped to train new recruits in this method once the conscription gets into full swing.” Naturally, even conscript mages required over a year of training before they could be properly fielded, which was why the Empire did it far in advance of actually needing such forces. If the war didn’t blow up into the Kaiserreich versus the world again, they wouldn't be needed but will have a solid magical education which could be parlayed into productive work, which Tanya had every intention of taking advantage of as well.
Generals who don’t plan for both success and failure will only find the latter, after all. “I may not have a proper military rank,” Tanya had to fight hard for that, but it was not, strictly speaking, a requirement for a subject matter expert to have one. “but I speak with the authority of Captain Weiss here, who will, of course, countermand any improper orders I issue.” The good Captain had remained attached to the project, as the first person taught the new techniques. It was a rush job, but the man picked it up quickly. He was, on paper, the person training the other soldiers, which suited Tanya just fine. “Address me as sir, like any other instructor. I promise not to become offended.”
“Sir, yes sir!” The soldiers responded, which put a smile on Tanya’s face. Ah, respect. So hard to come by, these days. Exquisite.
Comments
Gremlin Jack
Glorious. More please.
