13Leagues
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Dungeons and Dumbasses
🕑 Added 2023-01-05 17:38:10 +0000 UTCAfter a moment of deliberation, Rahim nods, "then we storm it." The party goes quiet, all eyes moving to the man standing to the side.
"Alright, that's it. I've had it," Chris shouts, jumping onto the log and taking a seat with his bottle in hand, "you've made some really questionable decisions today, but that's got to be the craziest. You want us to storm that big-ass castle? That one right there?"
"That's what I said, is it not? And do remember to address me as King Rahim from here on out, pirate."
"But …" Bradley says with wide eyes, "that's the castle of Lord Smasher. The man with three legions."
"Lord Smasher?" Zillah questions, cocking his head to the side in thought, "I think I'd like to meet a lord called Smasher."
"Not that kind of smash, Zillah," Amari giggles as she looks over her arrows. She has yet to use one, but it seemed the adventure was just beginning.
"I repeat, you want us to storm that big ass castle? Right. There?" Chris shouts louder, pointing to the castle in the background. His movements caused some of his drink to slosh over the top.
"Hey, hit me, and I'll break your finger," Sydero growls.
Rahim straightens his cloak, "we attack at dawn." He stalks away from the fire, the others watching until Chris turns his attention to the two women.
"This is your fault. You should've never switched their party cards."
Sydero shrugs, "as long as you die first, I think it would've all been worth it."
"And meeting Lord Smasher," Zillah smiles dreamily.
"Oh, Great Dungeon Master, Lord Roe, go easy on us," Bradley shouts to the sky, waving his stick around as if the action will summon some holy monster from above.
And, I suppose it did. Unholy, more so because Lord Smasher will smash them all. I'll make sure of it.
Art by Haleviyah
Comments
Marti (Lys)
I still think the crown for biggest dumbass of them all should go to Zillah. Love this so much lmao
