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[RNZO] Ch 330: A Wine Deal
🕑 Added 2025-07-14 22:21:11 +0000 UTC— — — — — —
"Let me try that wine—"
"… ahhh… damn, that hits the spot!" Steve downed a few gulps, eyes lighting up. "No joke, this stuff's amazing! And is it just me, or does it actually warm you up? I feel way less tired. The more I drink, the more awake I feel!"
"For real?"
"I'm in!"
Gulp gulp gulp—
One after another, everyone popped open a jar and took a few hearty swigs—even Renzo himself.
The reaction was unanimous: pure satisfaction.
"This is the best wine I've ever had! Even better than the finest godly brew back in Asgard!" Thor said in disbelief, staring at the jar in his hand. "And I swear it's doing something to my body—boosting my energy, my strength even! What is this stuff called? It's not from Earth, is it?"
He didn't mean to knock Earth, but wine this potent and gentle at the same time? That had to be rare. No way Earth could produce something like this.
At least, not yet.
Thor wasn't easy to impress—and this had impressed him.
"Just drink and enjoy," Renzo waved it off. "Why all the questions? C'mon, dig in—the food won't disappoint either."
He dodged the question intentionally. Talking about other worlds would just bring him trouble. Better to let them think he's some bizarre alien or something.
Less explaining that way.
"Oh? Then I must try the food! If the wine's this good, the dishes have to be something special too!"
Thor cheerfully grabbed a plate of Shawarma and shoved a handful into his mouth with zero hesitation.
The wild way he ate made Renzo cringe a little.
"Mmmph—this is incredible!" Thor's eyes went wide mid-chew. "You guys have got to try this! Best thing I've ever tasted! What's this dish called?"
"No way it's that good…" Tony scooped up a bite of some plain-looking noodles—then froze. "Holy crap. Okay, I take it back. This is amazing! Like, a hundred times better than anything I've eaten before!"
"Let us try!"
"Me too!"
"Count me in!"
"Mmm! So good! Renzo, you're a genius!"
Even Natasha and the others were blown away. They couldn't stop eating.
"I feel like after eating this, I won't be able to enjoy regular food ever again," Tony said dramatically. "Renzo, you owe me now. I'm traumatized. How about this—I'll pay you a hundred million a year. You cook for me three times a day, deal?"
"Get lost," Renzo laughed, rolling his eyes. "Do I look like someone who needs money? You want me to be your private chef? Dream on."
"Aww, c'mon," Tony groaned. "You're wasting a national treasure here."
"I'll make you a deal then," Tony grinned. "I'll pay for pre-orders. You don't even have to cook every day—just conjure it or whatever you do. Sound good?"
The others perked up at that idea too, all looking at Renzo with hopeful eyes.
"Nope. Forget it," Renzo said firmly. "If I'm in a good mood, I might treat you to a meal now and then. But don't think this stuff is free to make. You guys seriously think this comes with zero cost?"
Heh—technically, it did cost almost nothing for him to make, but why make life harder for himself?
"Alright, alright," Tony sighed in defeat. "Had to try."
"Hey, uh…" Thor scratched his head. "I won't push my luck with the food, but… can I buy a batch of that wine?"
That stuff had benefits, no question about it. Even his godly body felt the difference. Normally, strengthening his body required years of training—this wine did it instantly.
"Yeah! I'm in too!" Tony jumped in. "Forget the food—I'll buy 10,000 jars of that wine! How's one billion sound?"
"No deal," Renzo replied flatly, giving him a look. "You think this is ordinary wine? This stuff boosts your physique—it's priceless. I'll give you 1,000 jars for 1 billion USD."
"Done!" Tony agreed without blinking.
"Damn… undersold it," Renzo thought to himself. "This guy really is stupid rich."
He probably could've asked for 10 billion and Tony still would've said yes.
"Eh, whatever. I don't need that much money anyway. This billion should be enough as seed capital for my new company."
Renzo made a mental note.
"Uh… I don't exactly have Earth money," Thor said, a little embarrassed. "Can I trade for something else?"
"Oh? Sure," Renzo said coolly. "How about some Uru metal from Asgard? Or some magic books? I'll accept either. Unlimited supply!"
Compared to Tony, Thor was the real big spender in Renzo's eyes.
There were a ton of Asgardian treasures he had his eye on.
"Oh?" Thor was a little surprised. "Didn't think you'd know about Uru or our magic. That's impressive. Alright, I'm down. But Uru is super rare, and magic books are hard to value. How do we trade?"
"Let's keep it simple," Renzo said. "One kilo of refined Uru metal gets you one jar of wine. Deal?"
"Deal!" Thor agreed instantly. Sounded like a steal to him.
Meanwhile, back in Asgard, Heimdall—who was secretly monitoring all of this—nearly choked.
That idiot!
"If the Allfather finds out about this, he'll roast you over the Bifrost, Thor!"
Refined Uru metal was incredibly rare—even in Asgard. And this muscle-brained prince was trading it away for wine?
And the exchange rate? Highway robbery!
Still… Heimdall couldn't help but wonder… was the wine really that good?
Thor wasn't that gullible. Maybe?
"I'll send over the first 1,000 jars now," Renzo said decisively. "You bring me the Uru when you get back. Deal?"
"Deal!" Thor laughed heartily, thumping his chest. "You've got my word—I never go back on it!"
He was thrilled Renzo trusted him. In his heart, Renzo was now officially a friend.
Tony, naturally curious, raised an eyebrow. "So, what's this Uru metal you guys keep talking about? Is it really that great?"
A rare alien metal? Yeah, of course he was interested. And if Renzo chose it as trade currency, it had to be worth a fortune.
"Uru is a rare and powerful metal from Asgard," Thor explained proudly. "My hammer—Mjölnir—was forged with it. That Destroyer armor we fought last time? Same metal."
Tony's eyes lit up. "Now that sounds promising! Think you could sell me a bit? I'll pay ten million dollars per kilo!"
Thor waved him off like he was shooing away a bug. "No chance. What would I do with Earth's money? It's just fancy paper to me. And if my father found out I traded Uru for Earth cash, he'd have my head."
"Seriously?" Tony frowned. "Renzo just traded me 1,000 jars of wine for 1 billion dollars. That's like a million per jar. I'm offering you ten times that for your metal and you still won't sell? That makes no sense!"
Thor scoffed. "You don't get it. Renzo's cutting you a deal because he likes you. That wine is priceless—if he didn't want to sell it, all your paper money would mean shit."
That wine could literally enhance a god's physique. Tony didn't realize just how good he had it.
Tony turned to Renzo, wide-eyed. "Wait, it's that powerful?"
Renzo shrugged casually. "It's technically a spiritual tonic—something you won't find anywhere on Earth. I'm only selling it once at that price. Next time? Don't expect an offer."
He leaned back and added, "Drink one glass a day for a month, and your body's strength will increase by at least 30%. A year in, and you're looking at double that. It'll also boost your energy, improve your immune system, and yeah—enhance your appearance, too."
"You're welcome, by the way. You just hit the jackpot."
This wasn't ordinary wine—it was made using a spiritual brewing method, mixing culinary arts from various worlds and ingredients materialized from the most precious herbal medicines across realms.
Hearing that, everyone else in the room inhaled sharply.
"Damn, no wonder I felt so good after drinking it!" Steve added.
Natasha leaned in, eyes gleaming. "Uh, can I… buy some too?"
Her brain was already flashing the words beauty boost and enhanced physique. What woman wouldn't want that?
She had millions saved up—definitely worth it.
"I'll give you all ten jars each," Renzo said. "That's it. No more. I'm not selling. Or if you're desperate, talk to Tony. He's the one who bought a thousand jars."
Everyone turned to Tony like sharks who smelled blood.
"Hey! Those are mine!" Tony panicked. "You think I'm gonna give up even one of them?"
He held those jars like sacred treasures. Forget the health benefits—the taste alone made it worth hoarding.
"Tony, come on. Don't be greedy," Steve said, giving him a pointed look.
"Exactly! Did you even pay full price? If anything, Renzo gifted you that deal!" Natasha added. "Tell you what—I'll buy 50 jars from you. A hundred thousand each. That's all I can afford."
"I'll take 30," Hawkeye chimed in.
"Same. Put me down for 50, too. Just… put it on my tab," said Steve.
Banner raised a hand sheepishly. "Uh… I'd love 30 jars, if possible. I think it actually calmed Hulk down a bit. I don't have the cash, but I could work it off?"
"Whoa, whoa, hold on!" Tony cried, eyes wide. "You guys are insane! That's over 10% of my entire stock! No way I'm selling that much!"
He was already feeling territorial—and now his stash was under siege.
"If you don't share, we might just spread the word," Natasha said slyly. "Let everyone know you're sitting on a stash of miracle booze. Let's see how long it takes before every government agency and intergalactic dealer comes knocking."
"…You guys suck," Tony groaned. "Fine! I'll sell some, alright?"
He shot a glance at Renzo. "Boss, is there any other way I can buy more? I've got tech. My Iron Man suits, my arc reactor—hell, name your price."
"Wait—you're serious?" Natasha asked, surprised.
"Why not? It's mine to trade," Tony said with a shrug. "What I do with it is my business."
Renzo gave it a thought and nodded. "Alright. I'll take the full specs of your Iron Man suits—including the arc reactor tech—in exchange for 1,000 jars."
Tony's mouth twitched, but he nodded. "Deal."
Renzo then turned to the rest. "As for the rest of you—if S.H.I.E.L.D. has anything I'm interested in, I'll trade. Just don't go blabbing about this inside the agency. Only Nick Fury and Maria Hill are authorized to know."
At that, Natasha, Steve, and Clint all frowned slightly.
That was a red flag.
Was Renzo implying something shady was going on inside S.H.I.E.L.D.?
Was there someone they couldn't trust?
"We'll report it to Fury," Natasha said seriously. "Is there anything specific you're looking for?"
"Anything mysterious, powerful, or rare—exotic metals, unique tech, things I don't have," Renzo said casually.
"Got it," Natasha and Tony both nodded, already thinking about what they could offer.
Of course, none of them were about to go all-in just yet. They wanted to verify the wine's full effects first. And some of them were already secretly planning to analyze it, maybe even try replicating it.
Too bad for them—it was way out of their league.
Meanwhile, Thor was just sitting back with a smug smile. He wasn't worried. Renzo liked Uru and Asgardian magic books? Easy! There were treasures in Asgard's vault that could be traded for entire rivers of wine.
"Looks like I'll never run out of good wine again!" Thor thought happily. "And once Father gets a taste of this… he'll definitely praise me!"
For once, Thor was right...
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