dudebulge
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Bumper, your Neighbor
🕑 Added 2020-02-06 03:14:56 +0000 UTCSeems like every time you're in the backyard, your neighbor, a big fella who everyone calls 'Bumper' is outside in his. He's usually just wearin' a tank top, tattered underwear, and his favorite old trucker hat. He gives you a friendly smile under his unruly beard and a tip of his hat whenever you make eye contact with him over the fence. He doesn't have a wife or girlfriend that you've seen, and if you didn't both live in this part of the country, you might even think he was hitting on you! One sunny summer day he invites you over to his place and offers you a beer. Having nothing better to do, but mostly because you've always thought the old codger is pretty dang cute you take him up on his invitation. You plop down next to him on a lawn chair in the middle of his back lawn. The two of you get to chattin' but it's never much more than smalltalk. After several beers, Bumper starts pawing at his crotch.
"Hot day like this, feelin' good and buzzed, don'tcha jes' wanna beat yer meat?" He asks you with a sly grin on his face.
You're not exactly sure what to say, but then he's unbuttoned the fly of his boxer briefs and hauled his junk out onto the lawn chair between his hefty thighs. You blink in surprise, the beers clearly slowing your reaction time to the situation.
"Let's jes stroke ourselves this firs' time. See who shoots farther!" He suggests. "Nex' time though, I got sum other stuff in mind!"
Comments
Tyler Redican
Sexy daddy bear. Love to see a version of him in white briefs
Dude Bulge
Lol! Indeed.
Squeal
*sploosh*
Roque
...holy shit. I want him in... ways.
Dude Bulge
You and me both, Pa!
BigPaWolf
Would be very tempted to take up his invitation. ;)
freebo23
omggggg!
Dude Bulge
Ha! All I want are happy, horny patrons so, I'm not sorry! XP
Xyverz
You're making it so HARD not to fap here at work. I'd definitely do Bumper!
Dude Bulge
I'd be A LOT more into mowing the back lawn!
Dude Bulge
Ugh, right?
Doobige McBongbong
Sweet Jesus, what I wouldn’t give to have a neighbor like that. I’d be over every day to “borrow a cup of sugar”.
Valkybear
Damn! What I wouldn't give to have a neighbour like that.
Dude Bulge
Music to my ears. <3
Ah yes, the boner fuel I was looking for.
Dude Bulge
That sounds like a nice experience. :)
Burley
I've been with a man like this.... he was a sweet texan man. Learned much from him.
Dude Bulge
I just drew a dwarf redneck, and, voila!
Fuck yeah! He is one handsome bubba! If he was my neighbor, I would never go home! He can offer me a beer and I will return the favor with a cigar. Good job!
Dude Bulge
Haha, agreed. :P
Dude Bulge
Ty, ty!
Tiger
Hot man, hot story
stalfos
Holy fuck yes!
