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The New Normal - 3-3

🕑 Added 2023-05-01 14:11:14 +0000 UTC

Comments

Dracontorrin

Do not know how the orginal chap was looking but this is good enough still I would say that he went too hard but I would understand why John was like that. Heh - I should not be one to judge (but I will anyway) as I would probably told the press that Pryce was petty and send me out because he did not get his way with E4 and probably would say to Giovanni few choice words myself :D

The Tallest Tree

Better for sure 👍

Vtec

Changes have been made! Hope they're better!

Vtec

Thanks for the comment and the suggestions! I can certainly understand your points; and since it doesn't affect the other chapters I can change it up. Thanks for pointing it out!

The Tallest Tree

This felt a bit ridiculous and contrived. John’s freak out comes on way too sudden and much too strong to be believable. He can’t even talk about the issue before running away in a panic and locking himself in his room? To then immediate do something foolish like call Giovanni directly, realize he’s massively jumped the gun, double down, interrogate Giovanni’s subordinate, imply he knew all along about Giovanni and Team Rocket, all to come to the conclusion that he can’t trust the info he got and will have to wait to talk to Giovanni anyway…. Bruh. After you just had several scenes of him with his political hat switched on and seeming decently competent this just feels like a mess. What I’d have like to have seen was him being surprised, asking his family for details, inwardly getting angry and doubting Giovanni, putting it off to train his sister for a bit, call Giovanni, when Petrel answers mention that you and Giovanni had agreed to speak, when Petrel becomes evasive then question him a bit more and relate it to the news thereby justifying your knowledge somewhat so when he speaks to Giovanni later he can bring up Rocket legitimately


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