MessyAcademy
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Behind the scenes writing: Episode 2 (2/4)
🕑 Added 2020-10-27 01:02:30 +0000 UTC(Warning! This post may contain major spoilers for the story! Read further at your own risk.)
This is a continuation of episode 2 behind the scenes, please check out the previous part here. >>1st part<<
Episode 2: Our paths were fated to cross.
Continuing where we left off, the trio end up rushing off to class. They just made it as the bell rang, as John doesn't seem too happy, but overall excuses it for now just kindly reminding them to be careful for the future.
The three get ready for diaper attendance, as Brandon can overhear nearby students making remarks about Miki's dirty diaper smelling up the classroom. Which leads to one girl to tell John on her about it, as he has to confirm if she is the one and mentions that after his explaining of what's planned for today. She'll need to head down to the nurse's office.
He goes over their plans, mentioning that the previous week's test results came back for students and corrections will need to be made. This leads most students to be busy, as John has another plan for Brandon instead. He wonders if he could go read with a girl named Rachel or even just simply lightly chat with her would be alright.
He agrees after some chatting and figuring out that she's super shy, also learning that the academy has had issues trying to help her be more social.
After a quick awkward introduction between them, it soon moves into Brandon trying to find some common ground to talk about and he thinks she looks familiar. He makes the mentions that he's Erika's older brother in case she knew her, but with no effect.
He finds that she seems to interested in animals, slowly but surely breaking some barriers in being able to chat with her more and more. It'll lead towards talks of how she loves cooking and even hints that some girls once tried her treats in class, hinting that she was good and should make a club.
Brandon thinks her making a club would be a great idea, he'd stop by and what not. This makes her extremely happy and overwhelmed with excitement, as she wishes to show him her favorite tiger plushie.
She shuffles around with her bag on the table for a while, as Brandon notices her skirt slowly riding up her padded bottom. He is too focused on staring and taking it all in, but at some point he feels he needs to warn her. This is when a choice comes in for the player on how to warn about it, depending on the choice will lead to two different outcomes.
Shortly after showing her plushie to Brandon, trying to ignore the smell of her nervous farts and having to admit to it. She let's it slip by mistake that she was on the roof that night when Brandon had his run in with the pink werewolf, where she also corrects him saying it's a pink dog, not a werewolf.
But before he can get full answers out of her and she's stumbling to cover herself, the bell rings to end class, where she quickly rushes off. Leaving Brandon with some unanswered questions, but the main thing he did get out of it was that there is no such thing as pink werewolves, let alone werewolves in general.
~Writer notes~
-This is the next part in episode 2, which came out being roughly 3500-4000 word count.
-A lot of this is expanded on Rachel's original intro, much is still intact and some improvements have been made on her dialogue as well. Trying to cut down on her stuttering, but it is also her first time really chatting with Brandon. So we tried to keep that in mind as well.
-Fans of Rachel should really like what's there for her and even if you don't like Rachel, maybe you'll find her intro to be better than what it was before.
-This is seen as a bit of a conclusion to the whole pink werewolf arc that popped up at the end of episode 1. While there is some unanswered questions that remain about why she dresses up like that late at night, it's made clear that it's simply a shy girl dressing up and not a real werewolf creature.
-This will be about the half way mark of the episode in a way, there is a little light mentions to be seen in our next behind the scenes writing for episode 2 about Rachel. But it wraps up Rachel's stuff for now as the focus of episode 2, as we shift gears towards the second half focusing on another character who comes into the picture.
Comments
Oh no i noticed some of the changes rather quickly in chapter 1 but i thought i was tripping :D... Very Very solid improvement mate keep it up.
^^ Much like with episode 1 if you've tried it out, the goal is to improve the overall writing to bring it more up to how writing felt in the route part areas of the game. So writing quality improved, dialogue paced better/flowing better overall and then existing events are being expanded on a bit, along with some new fitting events that help bridge everything together to feel smoothly. ^^ (Overall there should be a good mix of episodes feeling familiar, but also still very much new with what's been improved on and added on top of.)
Oh i see, quick question are you rewriting for more fluidity if so keep it up its flowing better now. Sorry i try to follow your post but some i do miss.
