emma fielder
patreon
A Ramble and a Real Update
🕑 Added 2025-04-27 14:39:47 +0000 UTChey you! it's a bit of a serious one-- well, it's definitely a serious one, though i think i managed to keep the really dramatic/not great stuff mostly out of there. by keeping that stuff out though i feel like it minimizes the situation a bit, like, the house was not just smelling like cigarettes with a couple of mice-- without getting into it, it was. a biohazard. how did he acquire so many THINGS??? imagine if a dust bunny and a mouse got together and decided to open a bed and breakfast. smoking inside encouraged. INCENTIVIZED EVEN. but it's so so much better now!! it's breathable. thoughts and prayers for that little HEPA filter though. and when i say "not the best relationship," i mean we texted a couple times a year. and that was the extent of our speaking. (i think i had a better relationship with my adobe audition IT guy.) but that is also better, like i said!
i recorded this about a week or two ago, before my dad got back from rehab. he's home now and i greatly underestimated what it means to be someones caretaker full time, but i'm getting the swing of things and figuring out how to best get support so I can actually maybe figure out how to live my own life a bit.
I'll definitely be able to get one audio out by the end of the month, but if i am being realistic it probably will not be more than that, but i'm going to really try to make up for it in may as i'm taking time off from my other job.
i don't know that i've exactly been this transparent before, but i think i just really need people to know what's going on! and maybe if you're dealing with a similar thing you'll feel less by yourself, like i said. it does feel cliché to say i'm having issues in my personal life and that's why i've been absent this month. but, well, here we are.
i'm sorry i didn't update you on this sooner — the past three weeks (well, really four, since it started at the beginning of april) have been completely full, morning to night, with doctors, cleaning, and a little bit of crying in parking lots. ha ha! it's been one of the tougher times in my life, if i am being honest.
that said, i'm still here! and i'm still making things — and i’m planning to double up in may to thank you properly for your patience.
if you do need to pause or refund, i completely understand. but if you’re able to stick with around, it does make all the difference in the world AND i think you’ll be glad you did. because there are some REAL good one's that have just been simmering in the pot.
i think that's all the info.
thank you so much for your patience and kindness, I am. SO. Grateful. if you feel like sending me a little message about your own experience with this kinda thing i would not say no-- i might not have time to get back to you but the not feeling alone part has been really really helpful. i’m gonna keep doing my best—and if you ever need tips on mouse eviction or surviving on three hours of sleep, i am now an expert.
warmly, with love, with hugs that last a very long time,
emma
Comments
emma fielder
thank you. sorry for late reply!! or not sorry. i don't know. WELL REALLY i just wanted to say i’m sorry you’re going through something similar. it’s a very specific kinda stress and it means a lot that you shared it with me. i’m so grateful for the support, truly. sending strength right back to you and your dad <3 <3
emma fielder
thank you so much for this. sorry for such a short reply but i did really just wanna let you know that i’m really sorry you’ve been through all of that, and sending love right back to you and your parents, and appreciate your understanding so much (and for sticking around for soooo dang long ;_;)
Philthemovieguy
Oh Emma I am so incredibly sorry for everything that’s been happening and everything that you and your father have been going through. I can identify with you as just last February my mother had a pretty debilitating stroke that affected her whole right. Through months and months of hard work she’s been able to recover for the most part but she’s still wheelchair bound. And my father, well what you said about your father resonated with me as my dad for the last few years has had a progressively worsening COPD, especially in the last year that caused him to collapse and break his elbow and cause a hairline fracture in his hip. But that was a mere couple of months before my mom’s stroke. So when she went through that it was mainly me who spent a whole month straight making 45 minute trips every day to the rehabilitation hospital to be at my mother’s side and then stayed at my sisters sleeping on the couch downstairs close by for 10 months to help my mother do basic functions and tasks, take her to all her follow up appointments and out patient therapy and prepare her meals at home. Everything happened so fast that I didn’t even have time to realize that I immediately went into full time caregiver mode. The point to me writing all of this is to share in my understanding of you’re going through. No one prepares you for when the parents start aging and going through ailments. When I was a teenager I kind of became a lapsed catholic. Though my faith transcended beyond organized religion and continues on in my own way. So with that I just want to offer my unwavering love and support to you and your father. And I will keep you both in my prayers 🙏🏼❤️🩹
Sen
Hey Emma, I’m sorry you’re going through all of this. I’m going through something similar with my dad as he’s lost his foot due to complications from his diabetes and it doesn’t seem like it’s going to stop there. And I totally understand the stress and pressure of it all. It seems like you have good friends and their parents too so hold onto that support as much as you can. I will continue to support you as much as I can and I wish you nothing but the best ❤️. You’re doing great, you got this
