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Demesne 57 - Minions Need Maintenance
🕑 Added 2021-06-13 17:01:00 +0000 UTCLori didn't even have time to bask in her victory against Rian in their game (yes! She won! She won, she won, she won! Ha!). The sore loser (she won!) had immediately run off to hide his shame at her victory and had gotten everyone to settle down for the meeting. One of the tables had been moved to the far wall, which Lori supposed was where Rian would put his notes and sit.
The meeting started after Rian finally stopped gesturing at her, stood up and dragged her over to the table with him. Well, all right, he asked nicely, but Lori felt like she was being dragged, and from the look on his face only a healthy fear of imminent death at her hands kept him from actively dragging her himself. Still, she could be a gracious victor and indulge him by sitting in front of her demesne while he talked.
"All right, settle down." Rian said, and people quieted. There was a much more relaxed feel to the proceedings compared to last time. For one thing, a lot of the children were ignoring what was going on and were playing games quietly, though a few adults– likely their parents– grabbed the game boards, pulling them away. "Now, before we get started, I would like to thank our kitchen volunteers who have been cooking for us all. Every morning, I, and everyone else, can look forward to a wonderful, warm and hearty breakfast, and later on lunch and dinner. Would you all please stand up? Let's give them all a round of applause."
The men and women in question stood, smiling in embarrassment as they were applauded.
"Yes, thank you all," Rian continued cheerfully. "If it weren't for you, I'd have to eat my own cooking, meaning I'd be a dead man." Lori recalled Rian mentioning he could cook, so this was clearly just flattery and an attempt at humor. People laughed anyway. "All right, maybe no dead, but I'd probably be wishing I was." More laughter. Lori tried not to hang her head in embarrassment, berating herself for forgetting her hat in her room.
Rian continued on in this vein, praising the sawyers, the new ropers, the weavers (despite her still not seeing evidence of their work), Gunvi the potter and his apprentices, the farmer raising their crops (which were looking very well now, though not yet ready to harvest), the chandler for all the soap, the latrine cleaners (despite it being a punishment duty), the doctors (no one had died, most had recovered, and even the ones with broken bones were just waiting for them to heal) who were now helping prepare meals to be more balanced, the scouts who'd laboriously mapped out the demesne's terrain (wait, they had those?), the hunters and tanners who were making leather and furs…
The pointless flattery went on so long Lori felt like taking a nap. She really wished she could have just called the brat over to play a game as Rian droned on. Of had her hat to cover her eyes so she could take a nap.
"– and of course the children, who've been keeping us old people alive every day by causing a minor genocide of the seel population," Rian said. "Without them, I'm not sure even the kitchen volunteers would be able to keep us alive."
The children stood up with great enthusiasm to be applauded, and Lori was amused to note at least one switched out one or two pieces on the board while the other player was distracted.
"All right then," Rian said. "Everyone can sit down now. We're going to get to the part everyone's been waiting for."
The longwinded pointless praise and empty flattery had lightened the mood, but even so there was an increase in tension at those words.
"We're happy to announce that the second level of the Dungeon is close to completion," Rian said brightly. "It still needs a few civilized comforts, but as it is, if a dragon suddenly appeared on the horizon tomorrow, no one will have to worry about being left outside." There was some small applause and sighs of relief at this. "Also, if a dragon does appear on the horizon tomorrow, it's definitely not my fault for invoking it, so please don’t blame me."
There were a few laughs at the mention of the silly superstition.
"On a related note, the petition for moving all the mushroom's everyone's been growing into the new level of the dungeon was denied," Rian said. "Now, before anyone gets up in arms about it, it appears I wasn't told that the spores from mushrooms could cause illnesses, especially prolonged contact. So no, we're definitely not going to store growing mushrooms in the same place that many of us eat breakfast, lunch and dinner. I'm pretty sure our doctors are just going to get mad at us for both wasting their time and deliberately putting ourselves in danger."
Lori saw one of those she vaguely recognized as one of their doctors– why were they making her think of haircuts?– give a curt nod. "Mushrooms are good to eat, some of them, but not exactly healthy to be breathing the same air as for long," he said.
Rian nodded. "And we're going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume this suggestion was made in ignorance and not the very subtle first attempt to assassinate Binder Lori, since she'd be living closest to said mushrooms."
Lori jolted upright, her eyes suddenly narrowing in a glare.
"Ah, from the way the people involved are paling, it looks like you really didn't know, or you're all really good actors," Rian continued, still sounding cheerful. "That's good."
"Give me their names," Lori growled.
The crowd sat very still, as if not wanting to draw her attention.
"Would you even know who they were if I did give you a list?" Rian said.
Lori glared at him, but had to concede the point. She swept a look over everyone. "This had better not happen again," she said levelly.
"Yes, your Bindership!"
"Of course, your Bindership!"
"Please don't kill us, your Bindership!"
"It was his idea!"
"They were your mushrooms, you little uhog, I was just suggesting we keep them safe from dragons–!"
"All right!" Rian declare brightly. "So, bad idea made with ignorance and the best of intentions. A dedicated mushroom cave will be excavated as soon as convenient–" he glanced at Lori, who made a negligent gesture "– eventually. In the meantime, people growing them are advised to not store them inside the house, or else you and your family will get sick." He looked around. "As soon as this meeting ends, I suggest stacking the wood outside and airing the house. If anyone in the house or nearby starts feeling sick, see one of the doctors immediately, don't just hope you'll feel better. Understood?"
There were murmurs and nods.
"All right then," Rian nodded. "Next order of business…" He checked the plank he was holding. "We've been getting complaints about messy latrines. Be reminded that in addition to emptying them, those on latrine duty are supposed to be keeping them maintained." He held up a hand. "I know, I know, it's hard to do without water, we're trying to address that. But that's no reason to smear the stuff where people have to sit." He glared out over the crowd, who glared back in agreement. "The sad thing is the latrine next to where the children seel never has this problem, and they're the ones who maintain that, so whoever this is, they're an adult. Supposedly." He glared. "So basically, calling whoever is doing this an immature child would be a grievous insult to the actual children, who've all been hardworking and responsible."
"So, Binder Lori willing," Rian said, glancing at her. She inclined her head slightly to show she was listening. "Effective immediately, latrine maintenance will no longer be a punishment detail."
There were some relieved cheers at that.
"Instead, latrine duty will become an official job, to be occupied by… well, who know who you are," Rian said. "They will officially be held responsible for the state of the latrines." He held up a hand as a few people started making discontent rumbles. "Not finished. Punishment duty will be assisting those in cleaning latrines, as it would be literally unsafe to have you assisting anyone else, and that includes the children. Yes, I know who's been doing it. If you don't clean up your act, and you can take that any way you want to, the next step will be releasing your names and having you be the one to take the blame for messy latrines from this point on, whether or not you actually did it."
He waited. No one said anything.
"Good, you're not actually going to say anything about how unfair that is and tell everyone who you are now," Rian said. "First smart thing you did. Yes, this means you'll still be doing the same job. Only this time, there will be someone to watch you to make sure you do it right. And this takes care of the water problem, as now there will be an assistant to go get water." There were grumbles of indifference verging on assent. "There is a latrine right now that someone thought would be funny to smear. By the time this meeting is over, it's going to be dried, caked on, ripe, and extremely unpleasant." Rian smiled brightly. "You know who you are. I know who you are. More importantly, the person you've just been assigned to– assignments will be given out later– knows who you are. Clean it up after this meeting." Rian turned to her. "Unless her Bindership has anything to add?"
Lori didn't know who she was looking for, so she didn't look out over the crowd. "If you do that to any of the latrines in my Dungeon, I will have Rian find you, and I'll drown you in shit," she said, examining her fingers and scowling in distaste at the thought of the sort of degenerate who did things like that for, apparently, amusement. "Are we clear?"
Silence.
"Good answer," Rian said brightly. "If this smart streak continues, I foresee good things in your future. Other ways to materially improve matters to reduce the, let's face it, yuck of latrine duty are being pursued. I'll let you know which one we decide on." Rian examined the various things on the table that's he'd written on and picked up what appeared to be a clay pot that had been a container of travel rations for their trip to River's Fork.
"Lord Rian!" someone called out, raising their hand.
"Yes?" Rian said cheerfully, looking up towards the person in question.
"Aren't you going to–"
Rian raised a hand. The man in question quieted, as if unwilling to interrupt him.
"In time," Rian said. "We've got a lot of things to go over. One thing at a time." He lowered his hand.
"But Lord Rian–!"
"Ah!" Rian interrupted. "Here it is. Booze."
The voice immediately went quiet.
"Good, I have your attention again," Rian said. "The weavers and ropers are tentatively going to be given a temporary workspace in the Dungeon, once arrangements have been made as to where. This will allow us to secure the necessary equipment so we don't have to try moving it in the event of a dragon. I don't know when we'll be ready to receive you, but it will tentatively be within the week." He glanced at Lori. She thought about it and nodded. "Right, a week it is. The move will be done in stages, so you'll have time to–"
There was a minor commotion, and Rian cut off, frowning and standing to get a better view. Lori followed his gaze, annoyed.
It was the man who'd interrupted Rian. From the looks of it, he'd taken the game board that his daughter and another boy had been playing on, and was now hissing furiously at them.
"What's going on back there?" Rian demanded.
"Nothing, Lord Rian, just telling my daughter to put away her toys and listen," the man said hastily. He looked at his daughter and said, in a voice meant to carry, "you'll get this back after the meeting. You're here, so pay attention!"
Some of the other children in room who'd been playing during the meeting hesitated as the adults around them gave them 'there, you see?' looks.
It made Lori's blood boil.
"Whose board is that?" Lori demanded.
Rian, about to sit down, hesitated.
"Uh, what, your Bindership?" the man said.
"Whose board is that?" she asked, louder. The man was either deaf or stupid.
"It's mine!" the girl said.
"You're sure? It's not your father's and you're just borrowing?" Lori said.
The girl nodded. "I made it," the girl said definitely.
"Did you?" Lori asked.
The girl shrank back for some reason. Then, even more strangely, she turned to look at someone else in the crowd. Lori followed her gaze and was surprised to see her looking at the brat, who was nodding encouragingly.
The girl turned back to Lori. "Yes, your Bindership," she said. "I made it. I asked around for a piece of wood from the sawyers and carpenters that they weren't using, then I cut in the lines with a rock. It's mine."
Lori leveled her gaze at the man. "Give the girl back her stolen property."
The man stared at her as the murmurs became a buzz. "What? I'm no thief!"
"Literally everyone around you just saw you steal that girl's game board," Lori said. "I did as well. Are you calling me a liar?"
"I'm not a thief! She's my daughter, I was just taking away her silly game so she'd pay attention," the man said.
"And now everyone here has heard your confession to theft," Lori said. "As well as her testimony that board is hers. Flogging it is."
"Lori–!" Rian called, getting to his feet.
The man spoke faster. "Your Bindership, I respect you, but she's my daughter. As long as she's living in my house, she'll follow my rules, and that includes not playing when there's serious matters being discussed."
"Actually, it's her house, you're just living in it," Lori corrected. "The priority list was conceived according to who was actually actively contributing to the demesne. In addition to the people who'd been cooking all our meals and the sawyers cutting our wood, all families with children were housed purely on the strength of the fact their child has been providing the demesne with food by catching seels." She looked at the man holding the game board away from the girl. "So give that back, because the only reason you're not still sleeping in the shelters is because of your daughter. Technically, it's her house, you just live in it. She can live in it very well without you."
"I've been helping prepare our fields!" the man protested.
"And have we eaten anything from those fields yet?" Lori said. "Come back when we have bread. In the meantime, give her back her game board." Lori stared at the man until he complied. Then she turned back to the child. "Go back to your game. It's probably the only rest you'll get for a while."
The girl nodded, giving an awkward bow as she sat down again, inching just a little bit away from her father, who was still standing there. Lori ignoring the frustrated, aggrieved look the girl's father was giving her.
"That was why you had me reorganize the housing list like that?" Rian said next to her in a carrying voice.
"The children do good work," Lori said. "I'm not going to let them be taken advantage of."
"I'm surprised you didn’t threaten to flog everyone who'd taken a game board away for theft," Rian commented.
Lori stared at him, then bound airwisps to increase the volume of her voice. "Anyone taking a game board from a child that the child can prove they own is in violation against the law against theft and the child's right to own property. You have until the end of the day to return it or you will be flogged by the owner. Being their parent does not entitle you to ownership of the child's possessions. And be reminded that a gift is the property of the receiver to keep, not the property of the giver to take back. Children, if you have been stolen from, inform Rian after the meeting."
Rian sighed at the tumult this caused. "Why?!?!" he groaned, sounding aggrieved.
"Why what?" Lori asked.
"Just, 'why?!?!',"Rian sighed. "Why do you have to turn every parent against us?"
"Everyone has the same rights. That's what you asked for," Lori said.
"Yes," Rian groaned. "I did, didn't I?" He looked up at the ceiling for some reason as the tumult grew. Then he sighed and started banging his hand loudly on the table to get people's attention. It took longer than it usually did, which was very unusual "All right!" he cried. "Next is the matter of the complaints about the new houses being roofed!"
Comments
SCM2814
Lori believes Social Conventions need to make room for her laws.After all, a lot of social conventions are stupid and not made by people as smart as her...
Shakango Resident
Societal Conventions where? And Lori said those are the rules and it was so and it was Lori.
Rachel Christensen
This is the best response to the 'my child lives under MY ROOF' line I have ever seen and I love it.
