lovesickva
patreon
Why I havent been posting
🕑 Added 2022-04-26 02:13:09 +0000 UTCIm finally gathering up the courage to tell you all what has been happening, because you guys deserve to know. Im sorry its taken me till now but i will tell you why that is too in this.
Basically, for the first time in my career- im being harassed. Ive had people say the odd thing off or make tweets about me before, i all for freedom of speech so ive never made a big deal of it. Ive never put anyone on blast (especially when their following is smaller than mine). However ive never had anything as vile as this.
Someone found out one piece (a very very small piece) of information about my personal life, and has been harassing me about it. Saying very explicit things to me, about me, on every platform they can comment or message me on.
In a good way- this really highlighted to me how amazing and respectful my community is. I make explicit content, yet yall never ever make me uncomfortable or cross boundaries. I have never been harassed before!
Im learning as well that i really really dont take harassment well. I guess thats something im gonna have to learn how to deal with, being on the internet and all. Ive cried over the incredibly cruel things this individual has said- more painful due to the situation i find myself in (that i cannot and will not discuss simply because i cannot handle this person saying anything nasty about it).
I am more scared to talk about my personal life. Which i hate. I love being open with you all- you guys are the most supportive people on the planet! I genuinely just havent figured out how to not take the negativity and vile comments so personally yet. It hurts me, and they shouldnt. Im a people pleaser it might be because of that lol.
There is another thing- a more patreon related thing.
It has come to my attention that my content has been leaked.
I am dealing with really weird and complex emotions about that.
Its not about the money- i dont really care about that… it just feels so violating. In my head these were personal audios, hidden from prying eyes. As a person who isnt sexually explicit irl, the thought of the whole world hearing my explicit content against my will is just very… very… violating.
I know that this isnt a good way to feel. I know that i need to have thicker skin. I know all of this but thats just not who i am. I care deeply about things and unfortunately that includes things like this.
My personal life has not been simple either, i am heartbroken. I am trying to heal but nothing is ever simple or easy and i have found myself in a web very hard to get out of. I cannot elaborate on this and i am sorry about that.
On more bad things, my stepdads cancer surgery is tomorrow and while its most likely he will live from it- there may be irreversible damage that would cause him to never talk again.
So thats basically what has been happening in my life. I cannot stand it. I want to give you guys the world but im just not strong enough emotionally. I hate that so much. I feel a bit better now, so i am really gonna work my butt off to make sure everything is perfect for you guys. I cant express how sorry i am for everything, and how much i appreciate you guys.
Thank you, and i love yall.
Comments
Arc of Carona
*hug*
Kipper
Sorry to that you're going through troubles but I hope things get better
Megumi
Courrage !! We are here for you !! Don't give up!
FlameWheel64
Nobody is born strong. We gain our strength by overcoming the obstacles life presents to us. You may feel incapable now, but soon you'll rise up, Human Nature will see to that. You'll get through this, & you'll come out of the other side a better & stronger person. All the best, take care & good luck.
Artey
Harassment or leaks are probably things that people in the spotlight tend to face. I don't have a thick skin either and I don't know how awful this must feel. I'm sorry that I can't help you with this. But I hope you don't pressure yourself with making content in a time like this. I promise I'll keep up my pledge even if you don't post anything for a year. Have a nice day. :)
anon
Hey bro, this should just be a business relationship, keep putting out content and I’ll keep paying lol.
BenimusPrime
Just remember you have way more supporters than haters to turn to, and more normies than creeps. I hope everything turns out well for you and your family.
Jack Taylor
As Frank Sinatra says…. “That’s Life”. But at the same time. I get it, I’m get the same way, even though I know I just have to be thick skinned and keep my head forward even when I’m depressed, that doesn’t make depression any less real.
Skoodge
Take care of yourself first and foremost. Just want to let you know that you create some one of a kind audios, and we appreciate anything that you make!
That Big Slav Giant
Take as much time as you need, you gotta take care of you first and foremost, we still gonna love and support cha and I hope thing start looking up more here in the future for ya
Jordan Curry
I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you,I want you to know that we love and respect you and will support whatever decision you make going forward. Please take good care of yourself
Blackhart
Sorry your going through this. Hope it gets better for you and I hope your step-dad okay.
Raendzel
Just take care of yourself mate. Getting through fucked it shit is always difficult. I assure you it all gets better at some point.
Positivity Dealer
I don't think anyone will blame you if you start drinking cause damn that's alot
Infamous Nightraid
It's all good, Loves. You take care of yourself first and foremost. I hope your step father will be okay and you of course. Whatever happens, I hope for the best for you. You're wonderful and you give your all.
Michael Lancellotti
Hi Lovesick, I am so sorry to hear that that has been happening to you. Harassment in any form is disgusting especially when personal information is involved. I personally know how emotional damage can turn out and seeing you go through that hurts. I hope this does not hurt you and just makes you realize how vile this person is and how their life must suck to try to ruin yours. You go through all this stuff to give great content (which I just want to quickly say you are doing amazing at) and someone like that comes along and tries to ruin it. Especially if it is someone on here or someone who is supposed to be a fan. It especially hurts to know that you do your best to give us content to make us feel better when we are down and now that the roles are reversed there is nothing we can do for you (within legal reasons). When it comes to you saying that your not emotionally strong enough, that is not true. The fact that you wrote this post shows that you are able to put this situation out there and tell people how you fell about it. I, in a million years would not be able to do that, and I am pretty stuborn (trust me I got a pretty thick skull) that alone shows how strong you really are. I know what it is like to be picked on, made fun of, and harassed for little to no reason at all, and this person, who ever they are had no right to do that to you. Also, I hope your stepdad's surgery goes well, I had a few family members die to cancer so I hope your stepdad makes it out okay (which he will). Again, I just want to say, I hope this does not get you down to much you are stronger than you think and I want to let you know, you are loved and appreciated. Thank you.
dale garrett
that is so shitty loves ;-; i am so sorry to hear that!! :( *hugs* you know where we are you need anything, hope you get things resolved soon!! also really hope your step dads surgery goes smoothly!! please take as long as you need, be with family, they need you more, we'll still be here <3
Jeff :3
We completely understand, pls take all the time that you need! just go at your own pace, we’ll understand and we’ll patiently be waiting for you to return! I’m so sorry you have so much on your plate, no one deserves that and no one deserves to feel the way that you’ve been feeling regarding your content being leaked. Pls hang in there, I know things are really difficult rn, but things will turn out for the better. sooner rather than later. You’re never alone, and we’re more than happy to help you in any way that we can. We’re very grateful for you and we appreciate you so much. Do please hang in there!
