Azazyel
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Marvelous Shop, Chapter 1
🕑 Added 2024-06-18 11:53:01 +0000 UTC"Ok, I have seen many a Jake who died from violent, horrific ways, whether it be before their reincarnation or even after as they sometimes don't make the cut or are just unlucky. But you... You died in a pretty distinct way."
My sponsor flicked my file around for emphasis before dropping it and continuing. "Death by high-pressure nacho cheese machine exploding? Yeah, thats definitely a new one. Thankfully molten hot cheese coated your brain matter that was exposed by the shrapnel of the cheese tank so it's not like you felt anything before you passed on. But what a way to go."
I couldn't help a wry smile as I asked. "I cannot help but wonder if it was my fate to die as I was in such a rush that I skipped over a meat lover's slice of pizza and only settled for a slice of cheese pizza instead of waiting longer for the other slice... If I waited, I wouldn't have died there."
My sponsor nodded firmly before he said seriously as he spoke the wisdom of sages. "A man who lives by the cheese... Dies by the hand of the cheese."
We both shared a solemn look before I chuckled and I put my hands together before I spoke. "Anywho so what happens now? I much rather not go to one of those insane worlds like 40k with my reincarnation obviously."
The cosmic version of myself just chuckled as well before he said calmly. "Yeah... You aren't the type of Jake can shut down their minds and just smash someone's head into a door till its nothing but paste... You are one of the more calm and sedate ones. Hence why I have a Shopkeeper system prepared for you."
I raised an eyebrow at his words and I had actually done some research during my mandatory snuggle nap with a pile of beautiful women to help Jake's destress after coming back from the dead.
And in that research, I had learned that the whole point of my reincarnation was a form of passing the torch Jake's did between one another throughout the endless omniverse as each Jake that was reincarnated would help a couple of dozen reincarnate and give them methods to attain power that would let them stand at a high power level."
So I asked curiously. "How does becoming a shopkeeper make me powerful?"
"Easy, you not only deal in currency but with higher tier items you will deal in concepts and things that will cost immortals like myself quite dearly." My sponsor said with a wry smile as though in thought of such a purchase he made before shaking his head and continuing.
"Either way, such a method of power will help you greatly as you yourself certainly don't have the killing intent to become a cultivator anyway. Now, here is a general list of attributes for the store you will have and keep in mind that as you grow in wealth and power. So will the size of your shop."
I nodded in understanding and took the file he handed over to me and I gave it a quick read.
First of all. My shop was obviously going to be very durable from the outside and inside as I was going to a possibly hostile world to begin with. I would have all the paperwork I needed, there were magical defenses against scrying and teleportation made by my patron so they were going to be strong.
The shop itself was enchanted so I would know if someone spoke a lie within my shop, and the shop had an automatic thief-capturing system that would capture any would-be thieves and put them away in cells hidden within the shop's basement.
And then there was the kicker. Whenever I wanted, I could spend the world's local currency or higher tier currency, like souls, lifespan, memories or anything else to buy themed shipments. And they contents of the shipment would follow the theme of the shipment. Like I could spend some amount of money to buy a lower-rank shipment like non-hostile SCPs, stuff from COD Zombies like the drinks.
Or for higher-tier forms of currency, I could buy mechs, cauldron vial packs, devil fruits, or other items of power or things that could improve a person's capabilities.
"Alrighty, so where am I going by the way?" I asked as I passed back over the file after I accepted all the information on the file and understood that this was my life now.
My sponsor's face twitched and I knew I was utterly fucked as my sponsor who looked so alike yet was different due to his white hair, dragged his hand through his longer white hair before he said slowly. "Sooo I got a bit of a bad draw on the world lines I have access to insert you into."
He held up a hand and then listed out the three options I apparently had. "First is a crap shoot, basically Mass Effect but instead of Reapers invading the Galaxy, it's the Reapers in much larger numbers... And the Tyranids from Warhammer 40k that leaked into there. Because some asshole wanting to see what would happen should they just shit in the petri dish."
My sponsor shook his head and held up two fingers as he said. "Next option. A Monster Girl Encyclopedia world, nice wholesome lewd fun normally... But now the goddess of said monster girls was killed by Doom Guy who was kicked out of his local hell for a bit and then with the goddess dead and killed and Argent energy flooding into the world the monster girls became corrupted into terrible monsters... No wholesome lewd fun to be had there."
My sponsor finally held out his third finger and said. "Now this is your best option now even if its still a bit worse off than usual due to the setting's naturally powerful defenses. It's an Ultimate Marvel universe with all the fun shit going on, but when some random Kaiju's from basically Pacific Rim and other universes invaded the world, the Supernatural World decided with giant monsters invading the world every couple of weeks they can't be bothered to hide anymore."
My sponsor had an evil smile as he spoke coldly. "Yeah, some dumbass vampires thought they were hot shit when they decided to attack a small town in America and learned the hard way that a .50 BMG round will kill them far easier than a stake will.
He shrugged and said bluntly. "In either case, although the situation is bad... Flesh and blood Kaiju versus Hulk has an obvious winner in such a fight, to say nothing of how Kaiju bodies have materials that can be used to reverse aging in their stem cells. Then their blood be used as clean fuel for science related stuff."
"The whole body in general can be used in highly potent rituals and so much more. Honestly its basically a bonus with how the world will be so much further fortified from constant invasions from Kajius." He finished with a shrug before he said.
"It's a bit more dangerous honestly but your store will be safe from such attacks honestly."
And then he moved a couple of files over while he muttered. "And that about does it. Your first powered shipment is already ready within the store and the alternate universe portal is primed for you to go on your own resource runs... So any questions at all?" He finished as he held out a golden key that floated above his hand.
I shook my head as I didn't have any major questions to ask so with a little noise the key shot forward at blinding speed and I shivered at feeling the large golden key get shot into my chest.
"Ok! Good luck and don't get suckered in by a honeypot haha!" My sponsor laughed as I grunted when I was suddenly sucked into a portal behind me and my vision was consumed by multicolor lights.
-
All too soon I dropped onto my feet outside the portal I was sucked into. And as soon as I felt my feet hit the ground I heard a whirl and I looked around... And saw that I was in a gas station-sized little convenience store that I felt an intrinsic connection towards.
The first thing I noticed was the five aisles that was in front of the cash wrap counter that had the till/cash register beside it and mounted on the sides of the store were large shelves that went up to my head level which meant that children couldn't reach them.
And then a buzzing noise rang out so I quickly made my way over to the register and realized it was actually more of a computer than anything. And displayed prominently was a large envelope with the words 'You got mail!' being displayed right below the envelope.
So using the mouse attached to the computer/cash register I clicked the envelope and I shivered as I felt something inside of me open up and I realized as I looked within myself was a small pocket dimension that had a large crate within in.
Not knowing what exactly to do I went back to the envelope and began reading the note that came with it.
[You don't really have a system or anything of your own, but as any good reincarnator, you need a pocket dimension you can use. So when you buy themed shipments through the system/computer they will be directly teleported into your small pocket dimension in so you can take them out and put them in the basement or whatever to store and unload the shipments at your leisure.]
And just below the message was a shorter little note which read. [PS. I made sure you got an interesting first-themed shipment... I hope you enjoy it and try to stay alive buddy! Don't get eaten by a werewolf or something!]
'Alright... Lets see what this shipment is. I probably need some powers, weapons, or hell maybe even a power system of my own!' I thought excitedly as I quickly went into the back of the store and seeing the upstairs I knew that would lead to the small apartment I was supposed to live within.
And next to a set of stairs leading down was a cargo elevator of all things so I took the cargo elevator down to learn what it was like and once I reached the basement I couldn't help a wolf whistle at the sight in front of me.
The basement was fucking huge! Like the size of an American football fields with several cells with bars for doors lined up on the side of the large concrete-like slab stretch in front of me.
After looking around a bit more, I found some simple tools like a crowbar, hammer, etc and then with a soft thump the large shipping cargo container touched home onto the ground.
And as I opened up the shipping container my mind filled with its information. All the wonders within were granted to my mind and I realized the great... And terrible power I had.
Silently and with solemnly I put on the dark brown hat while also putting on a purple suit jacket that went over my clothes while I picked up a cane.
"Alright Cosmic Willy Wonka... I will respect that." I whispered as my mind filled with the information before me.
Brain Feed- A dog-like treat that when eaten would raise up an animal's intelligence level to a human and allow them to speak any language they grew up around.
Everlasting Gobstoppers- A gobstopper that can be sucked for a hundred years before melting away into someone's mouth.
Fizzing Whizbee's- A sherbet ball that when eaten would make you levitate
Frost Bites- Little mint drops that make your body radiate a deep chill and all water will freeze anywhere near you and you will be immune to great amounts of heat and cold.
Chocolate Frogs- Animated frogs made out of chocolate that when eaten will make you resistant to dark magic and help recover from depression.
Flame Outs- Spearmints that when eaten would allow you to breathe fire at will
So... So many more options all being sold in groups of fifty and as I took in the list, I saw it didn't just have candy.
It also had desserts like the Eat-Me Cake from Alice in Wonderland and other things.
'Well, although most of the candies effects are temporary... Its certainly something can sell rather easily.' I thought as I began taking them out and could mentally feel the objects' price.
So with that all said, I quickly moved all the desserts, candy, and other sweets that needed to be sealed away or refrigerated away into some glass door fridges that seemingly popped up out of nowhere while the rest went onto some of the shelves with most of the candy going on the front of the cash wrap stand near the register.
"And now... We wait." I muttered as I sat down on a sinfully soft chair and just relaxed for a minute after unboxing and stocking the shelves.
But then I realized something rather crucial... I certainly didn't have any advertisements up for my store! There was no way in hell someone was just going to wander into my store for no good reason!
-
Knowing that if I wanted to drum up some business, I needed to get people interested in what I had for sale, I took out some Frost Bites, Chocolate Frogs, and some other special candy that could travel well in a small backpack I found next to the world portal that would lead me to a world in which I could acquire materials, items and advanced currency. But the portal gave me a fucking weird feeling so I avoided it.
And then I left my shop with the backpack on my back and a pen with some sticky notes in hand as I left to get information on wherever the hell I was.
However, as I left the store and took in my surroundings... I blinked and looked around with a chuckle escaping me at the fucking awkward-as-hell surroundings near me that I fairly easily recognized.
First of all. I was literally in downtown NYC, and my shop was somehow squeezed between two skyscrapers in the middle of Times Square of all places and it was clear that the throngs of people walking through Times Square... Saw my store as well as something weird and were blatantly staring at me for coming out of the store.
So I woodenly turned around and then walked back into the store and all but ran to the register to pick up and read the damned paperwork for this place which had its own note attached to it.
[The land has been owned for over a hundred years and are tied up in so many grandfather clauses and the land has already been paid for, for the next hundred years so don't worry about the city management trying to kick you out of there legally.]
"Well, that's a load off my mind." I muttered before I took a breath and then put away the stuff that I took out... As with my shop landing smack dab in the line of buildings of Times Square. I didn't need to run around at all.
With tens of thousands of people walking past my store. I would have plenty of people walking just to see what the small store was doing.
And low and behold my thoughts were right. As not even like five minutes later, I heard a soft chime of someone coming in and I looked up from the computer/cash register I had been reading the details of and learning how to properly use it when to see my first customers.
"Hello! Its my first day opening so please excuse the empty shelves and tell me if you need anything. But make sure to read the labels before doing touching anything!" I called out as I looked at the trio of two teenage boys followed by their mother it looked like.
"Hmm if you aren't ready..." The mother started off with an obvious bit of confusion in her eyes but I shook my head as I smiled and said.
"Nothing to mind, my stock isn't so simple after all." I spoke cryptically and my words proved correct as one of the teenagers called out excitedly.
'Wait so this is a magic shop! So like you are a wizard or something!?" He asked excitedly and I was reminded about how the Supernatural was very much out of the bag in this universe due to the kaiju's stirring up the hornets nest that was the monster eco-system.
So I nodded and fibbed a bit. "Something like that. Most of the candies and desserts before you are very much temporary but there are some that will give people permanent boosts and powers."
The mother now looked unnerved as she swallowed and asked softly. "May we leave? I don't think this shop is for us?"
The kids looked downright mutinous at their mother's words so I shook my head with a knowing smile as I said gently. "You are under no obligation to buy anything. Nor are you in any danger from me as a possible customer. But I do suggest taking a look around, it's not like I am selling anything cursed and truly powerful candies and desserts cannot be bought with simple dollars."
One of the kids grabbed a box of chocolate frogs and then pointed at the pack of the Spider Bites that were locked away and asked his mother. "Mom... Can we please have a couple of spider bites? I wanna be Spiderman for a couple of hours please!"
My lips twitched at the reminder of those candies and I gently warned them. "Those bites cost ten ounces of silver each, and they allow you to climb up walls, and a bit of super strength. I had to remove the web shooting bits to avoid a lawsuit though."
'Damned Sony keeping Spiderman locked away...' I thought with annoyance before refocusing as the mother looked at the chocolate frogs and asked. "Uhm the Chocolate Frogs, how much?" She lead on and I raised an eyebrow and said calmly.
"They are much simpler even if they have some interesting uses in helping to recover from dark magic exposure. So they cost twenty-five USD each."
She slowly nodded and as the kids happily brought over the snacks I took their mothers credit card while the kids went back to scanning the stuff and then excitedly came to ask if the higher-tier candies actually did what the labels said.
But then as I saw one of the kids lead the mother away to show off the Sugar Floss, and Caramel Cavity Fillers candies I saw one of the kids close in steathily and I asked quietly. "Whatcha want kid?"
He visibly steeled himself and whispered. "Bro, is there anything I can do to earn one of the permanent power candies or snacks?"
And I remembered perfectly well that I needed to sell seventy-five percent of my wares to make an actual profit so I raised an eyebrow and looked the teen up and down which made him smile wryly, I then said bluntly.
"You and your brother cannot afford such things with your mindset of today... But if you are willing to do me a favor I am willing to give you two Ironhide Jawbreakers that will give you some super strength, and skin that will block and absorb the impact of guns up till about 308 comfortably."
Before he could respond I took out a bag and began filling it up with two of every lower-tier but still clearly magical item while I said. "You are going to make a Youtube account, and then you are going to take videos and post them of the two of you eating them to advertise for my store with the location of the store being mentioned in all the videos. And once you have finished all the candy over a few days... You two eat the Ironhide Jawbreakers to gain the permanent powers."
With everything said and done, I held out a hand to him with the to-go bag held in between us and a power filled the surroundings as I looked into his eyes with my voice almost having a rumble to it as I spoke. "Do we have a deal?"
And the teen swallowed and seeing his mother hurriedly look around the corner with fear in her eyes. He stabbed forward with his hand and I felt the deal being made and being bound with his mother grabbed him by the ear and dragging him from the store while my chuckles filled the store.
His explanation of getting paid in magical candy didn't do shit when it came to apparently accepting a deal with the devil as it were.
Comments
NaitSabes Selaravi
Ultimate marvel. Time to kill Mr. Fantastic.
JR Lane
What world is in? Because that is the most important thing here lol
Clercho
Can you give Jake the power of Ulquiorra to defend himself? I want to see willy wonka make a zero
Austin Levy
Senzu beans from DBZ
Austin Levy
Tailed Beast Drug from Naruto
Bio_Bill
Gundam action figures package, and they all work as in the relevant shows.
Bio_Bill
Infamous games powers package
Bombasticlambast
Add some random food and flora from toriko and one piece if you want the wackiness of Willy wonka dialed to eleven
ZloGlaZ
Any recommendations?
Bio_Bill
Could also go with something like a magic package full of materia.
Son-Of-Scorn
Ahhh yiss, I love a good store story
ZloGlaZ
Well, D&D themed potions and maybe low level artifacts are safe bet. Heal & Cure will sell like hot potato:)
Iori Daemona Angel
You should get a Magical girl shipment with silly gadgets
krane 97
How about toriko ingredients with some way to gain the gourmet cell.
Wrath of Vajra
Sudden Idea: If Jake has the ability to travel to another universe entirely, what if Jake stumbles onto the GOW Universe, where he meets the Huldra brothers in the second year of Fimblewinter and the three make business and help each other down the line. And Jake in turn would then learn how to step into the realm between realms like Brok and Sindri could, hell, maybe even bring a piece of Brok's soul back if lucky as an act of good faith, I dont know if it works like that, but hey, I can hope.
Clercho
Ohhhhh
Bio_Bill
How about an SCP pet shipment and sell some indestructible lizards or happy slimes?
Loghead101
I can’t quite think of some themes but what if you make some kind of Gacha section of his shop that randomizes it’s contents every few weeks, allows people to try what the prizes are in a trial and the have to spend money to get a chance for what they want. Just for an example, say you did the Genshin Impact weapon banners and each weapon essentially gives someone the powers of that weapons signature wielder. Have a bunch of Xiao’s pogo sticking everywhere, Yelan’s going invisible and the like. Any future theme could be added if it fits whether it be more weapons, powers or little trinkets. There are little vending machines and shops that have little gacha in it so it wouldn’t really be out of place and very much in line for a shop keeper who needs to get strong by selling a lot of items.
Bishop7053
Psyker shots. Shots of whiskey that turn you into a psyker from 40k. Imagine Fury's blood pressure when he discovers a bunch of telepaths showing up who are walking security risks not to mention inviting 40k fuckery into this shitshow of a world. Embrace the chaos for the lols. Or mutant munchers. Candy that makes you a marvel mutant. Xavier and magneto would have a stroke
Benji
Can’t wait to see the next chapter
Hmm is it time
Thanks for the chapter.
Haggeo Gomez
Everyone wants candy themes 🤣, what about a star wars pack? Would love to see what people do with midichlorians in a bottle, maybe a syringe?
Bio_Bill
You know how Wonka has his chocolate laying gooses/hens? How about SCP-3199 and have them lay some sort of Cadbury egg instead of the normal one? SCP-330 could be a self filling sample bowl that instead of taking hands if more than two is taken, teleports them into the cells below. Now we can't have prisoners (or anyone really) remembering their imprisonment or anything unsavory, so how about a fish tank (that has some TARDIS like tomfoolery going on inside the tank) with SCP-3000 for helping people forget. Maybe some SCP-939's fed some of that Brain Feed item to be your forgotten enforcers.
Traveling Toaster
Some temporary pokeballs. Each throws out a random Pokemon (the better the pokeball the better the odds for a better stat pokemon) and they only last for a limited time before disappearing.
Azazyel
When I mean themes, it doesn't have to be just candy. It can be SCP's lootboxes, Fallout Theme shipment.
Azazyel
Hmmm? Maybe that can be an idea
Azazyel
Hmm very good idea to add though it doesn't have to be just candy
Bio_Bill
Candy themes to throw out that I can think of off the top of my head and Googled. Candy Flurry manga/anime (no idea what it's about but seeing as the definition stated a lollipop user destroyed Tokyo might look into it), apparently Candy is the name of a mascot for a Pretty Cure character which is about magical girls (might do something with that), Majin Buu's ability to turn people into candy (thieves get turned into new stock and the person who eats them gets their powers if they had any), I think there was some Cuphead stuff that was candy based.
Traveling Toaster
Gotta sell some truth serum spiked Lemon Drops, Fury well be all over it and move Jake up a tax bracket.
Ototsu_Yume
How about Naruto cocktails or fizzy drinks? Each one gives a Naruto bloodline power, he could also sell jutsu scrolls and chakra awakening stuff. :p
Rockinalice
Hey its a shopkeeper Jake, I wonder if he would buy something like the Dark One Dagger just to see who would be willing to buy it Or use it himself to get summoned outside the shop to get prospective consumers another method.
Iori Daemona Angel
Oh shit, I hope violence can't be done in his shop lol
Azazyel
You guys can suggest other themed shipments for him to buy as well. I could even make polls for the shipments to give you guys some control over the story a bit maybe
DarkthShadow
This promises to be a fun, and funny read, looking forward to more.
Azazyel
Exactly!
ZeroLink21
Yes Jake the Willy Wonka of marvel I love it lol
