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Never Give a Yandere a Bolter [A Cliche (Yandere) 40k Romcom] Ch.28
🕑 Added 2023-06-21 14:47:54 +0000 UTC“Ugh, that dummy…” Lacey muttered.
Lady, the only one close enough to hear her, chuckled, “Yeah… You gotta admit he’s getting pretty good though, right?”
They were watching as Octus and Sabine dueled, something that had become a routine aboard the Immortal Spirit. Octus and Sabine had sparred every day except for one during the ship’s month-long journey through the Warp. Their training sessions attracted crowds of Guardsmen, Voidsmen, and Sororitas every evening. Lady and Lacey hadn’t missed a single spar either.
At first, the Corporal and her Commissar came to offer support and watch Octus get his ass handed to him. Then he started getting good. Like, actually good. He won just as many spars as Sabine did now and instead of just offering support, Lady and Lacey had started rooting for him to win.
The cause of Lacey’s muttering wasn’t actually related to the training duel they were watching. While the spar was exciting, it wasn’t tense. She knew neither Octus nor Sabine would get hurt. And getting Octus’ abilities up to the level of being able to match a Sororitas in combat could only be a good thing in Lacey’s book.
No, her frustration was more personal than that, “It just feels like he never has time for us anymore. We’re still his friends, right? And we were here first… Shouldn’t we have some sort of priority?”
Lady sighed, “He’s just… busy. You know that. A lot of stuff has been piled onto him in a short period of time. I’m sure he hasn’t forgotten about us…”
“But-… but what if he has?” Lacey asked in a small voice, concerned at the idea of losing her childhood friend.
Lacey was from the same planet as Octus. The same Agri-World where nothing seemed to happen. When he declared his intentions of going into the Imperial Guard, Lacey signed up with him. She’d known him all his life and it felt like she’d had a crush on him for even longer…
It would be hard not to have a crush on Octus Humblestock if you grew up next door to him. Even as a child, he had this… this charisma that sucked all the other kids into his orbit. Not all of those kids liked him, mostly due to jealousy or some sense that they had to prove they were better than him, but that never seemed to bother Octus.
He went his own way, unconcerned with the politics that kids developed between themselves. If he was shunned by the other kids one day and loved the next, he didn’t mind. Octus was always simple like that. And through it all, he kept one person by his side.
Lacey’s family had lived next to Octus’ family for generations. Their moms were friends. Their dads were friends. Their grandparents were friends. And Octus and Lacey were friends. That was just the way life worked back then.
Even after they joined the Guard, that was the way life worked. Octus and Lacey stuck together through every bit of training they were put through. And it paid off. They quickly caught the attention of their regiment’s Commissar, Lady.
The next few years were… well, they couldn’t be called blissful. There was too much fighting, too much killing, and too much death to be called anything close to that. But Octus and Lacey were able to stick together. And together, they survived. They didn’t just survive, they excelled. They even added another member to their core group. Lady brought them up to a trio.
Then they came to Charon Prime and Octus met Sabine. Lacey didn’t hate Sabine. She actually thought the Sister was quite good for Octus. Sabine showed Octus that he was loved in a way Lacey had never managed to do. And Lacey had always known that she wouldn’t be the only woman in Octus’ life. If Sabine was the one who finally got Octus to open up to relationships, Lacey could only thank the Sister of Battle, sing her praises, and hope that she’d reap the benefits of a less dense Octus as well.
So far, though, that last bit was still just a dream. It seemed Lacey was destined to be the third or fourth woman in Octus’ life. Maybe tied for second… She figured she was about equal with Lady in the race for Octus’ heart. She’d known Octus longer but the Commissar had this way of worming her way into people’s lives and staying there. And the less said about the force of nature that was Sabine, the better.
At least Lacey could feel secure in the fact that Sona wouldn’t be competition. Girls talked, after all. And while Sabine wasn’t the most comfortable with ‘girl talk’, she’d still made her intentions for the former traitor clear. Sona would always be at the absolute bottom of Octus’ harem-totem-pole. She was more like Octus’ property than one of Octus’ women.
That was another thing that came up during ‘girl talk’. Sabine was adamant that Octus was still on the market, so to say. The Sister didn’t deny her feelings or the place she must have claimed in his life, but she also made it clear that she was encouraging him to not limit his options. The way Sabine explained it, she wanted Octus to spread his greatness to the world. And the best way to do that was by conquering hearts and minds with his trademark Himbo charm.
So for multiple reasons, Lacey didn’t dislike Sabine. Quite the opposite, in fact. In just over a month, Sabine had done for Octus what Lacey had been trying to do for years. Sure, that failure stung a bit but Lacey was just happy for her childhood friend. And happy that she finally felt like she had a real chance with him.
Now if only he had the time to spare for her and Lady… Lacey huffed to herself again. There was just too much for Octus to do these days. He’d been elevated to become a Rogue Trader — something Lacey was exceptionally proud of him for and still could barely believe in equal measure. But that elevation came with obligations and lessons and responsibilities that left Octus with little free time.
And the one time everyone had gotten him to take a break, he’d gone and fucked Sona’s brains out! Remember that was frustrating and more than a little arousing. After Octus and Sabine didn’t show up for their spar one evening, Lacey had heard about his Inquitistor-ordered break. She and Lady obviously went to go find him immediately, eager to hang out with the last member of their trio.
They’d arrived at his quarters to be met with what sounded like a war going on inside. There were screams and moans and bangs and thumps and claps and smacks all radiating from behind the closed door to Octus’ room aboard the Immortal Spirit. When they dared open the door, they saw something that would be burned in both of their minds for the rest of their lives.
They found Sona, naked and insensate, slumped on the floor of the quarters’ living room. She was covered in sweat and sexual fluids and her eyes had become literal swirls of unseeing pleasure as she vaguely muttered things like “interesting~”, “Master~”, and “more~”. And still, the absolute cacophony continued to come from the bedroom.
Lady and Lacey had peeked their heads in, already knowing what they would find but not quite believing it until they saw it. The smell was what hit them first. It was primal, almost savage, and oh-so-tantalizing to their senses. Then came the view of Sabine bent over the bed, mewling and moaning like a mind-broken bitch as Octus railed into her from behind.
He was glorious. Sweat glistened on his broad back. His hips moved like a blur. He was almost growling with each powerful thrust of his hips. He was so consumed with what (and who) he was doing that he didn’t notice their entrance.
Both Lady and Lacey felt their knees go weak. They backed out of the room before its rutting occupants could notice them. They figured that now wasn’t a good time to be bothering Octus or Sabine. While the savage version of Octus she’d seen did appeal to her, Lacey didn’t want her first time with her life-long crush to fade into a breeding fugue… That could wait until their second time together.
Lady tried to make a joke about the situation as they left Octus’ quarters to find something else to do, “Looks like you’ll have your work cut out for you when you get with him, eh Lacey?”
“Yeah, but with you there to help me, maybe, just maybe, we’ll survive with our pelvises intact.”
“M-Me?! H-Haaaa… W-Whaaaaat?” Lady blushed, stammering out an unconvincing denial. “N-No way… H-He’d never go for a roughed up o-old lady like me… A-And it’s, like, not l-like I l-l-like him like that anyway…”
“You just said ‘like’ four times in a single sentence,” Lacey deadpanned.
“S-Shut up,” Lady continued denying reality before she grew depressingly sober with a sigh. “I don’t deserve love anyway. Especially not from someone like Octus. I’ve done too much in His name…”
“Do you really think that?” Lacey asked. It pained her to see one of her two friends like this. Lady looked so depressed and resigned as if she’d already accepted the idea that she was unlovable.
“Just… Just drop it,” Lady said, shaking her head and looking so different from the friend Lacey had come to know and love.
And so Lacey did. She’d dropped the subject and hadn’t brought it up since. But it still lingered in her mind. Lady thought she was an imposter in the race for Octus’ love. She thought she would be alone for the rest of her life and she thought that was what she deserved. Her upbeat, teasing personality was just a mask to hide the lonely, damaged woman inside. Lady thought herself unlovable.
And Lacey didn’t know what to do about that. She didn’t know how to help. She was never good with this kind of thing. There was a reason she only had one friend before joining the Imperial Guard. Only Octus was willing to put up with a mousey girl like her.
She’d always been a bit different than the other kids on their homeworld. She was bookish and introverted, more likely to be found inside with one of her mother’s rare books than playing in the fields with the rest of the kids. She was shy and timid, never able to stand up for herself and she only began to grow out of her awkwardness after she’d come of age.
But she knew Octus would know what to do. He’d be able to help disabuse Lady of the notion that she was unlovable. But he was always so busy now. And Lacey was worried at the prospect of piling more problems onto his plate.
Of course, Octus would never mind. He’d always make time for his friends. And Lacey knew that. Still, she was too nervous to even make the first approach. That little pessimistic voice that had been with her for her whole life worried that he was too good for them now. He was a Rogue Trader now, after all, and they were just a mere Guardsman childhood friend and his old Commissar.
As Lacey watched her life-long friend duel a Sister of Battle into submission, the distance between them had never felt more vast. Octus had always been special, especially to a timid little girl like Lacey. He was the one who brought her out of her shell and showed her all that she could be.
But now he was shining so brightly that it was almost intimidating. Lacey sighed. He was spectacular. Could she ever measure up to that greatness? Did she even deserve to stand by his side? Did… Did Lady have the right idea by giving up on happiness before she could be disappointed…?
“Take heart, young Lacey,” a low, powerful voice split through the silence between Lady and Lacey, seeming to appear out of thin air. “You have not been forgotten. Neither of you has. I say this with confidence… both of you will always have a place in Octus’ heart.”
Both Lacey and Lady jumped in surprise, spinning toward the source of the voice. When they did, they came face to face with a golden giant. Octus’ Custodes guardian, Alastor, had appeared beside them without a single noise. As Lacey and Lady tried to calm their heartbeats, they both had the same thought. Nothing that big should be that quiet.
“M-My Lord?” Lacey asked timidly. “Is it a good idea for you to be addressing us so casually? Will others not get the wrong idea?”
Alastor waved off her concern, “Do not worry, young Lacey. We will not be bothered. Octus’ sworn Blank will ensure that much.”
As he said that, Lacey and Lady noticed that Alastor was not alone. Sona stood by his side, her eyes locked on the form of her master in action. The Blank’s gaze darted to them as if noticing their attention. Lady and Lacey were both struck by the odd sight of pulsing pink hearts in her eyes before Sona turned back to her master.
“Besides,” Alastor continued. “I find myself rather fond of you, in particular, young Lacey. You have been by Octus’ side longer than anyone bar me. Through my duty to Octus, I’ve watched you grow and blossom into a wonderful woman. And though you did not realize I was there, I am proud to have been a part of your life. In fact… I dare say I am rooting for you.”
The words of encouragement from a Custodes of all people left Lacey flustered, “Y-You are?! I-I-I’m flattered, My Lord! W-Would… would it be possible to ask for your advice?”
“Oh my, yes, go right ahead.”
“How… how do I get Octus to notice me? Notice us? It feels like he’s just gotten farther and farther out of reach…”
Before Alastor could respond, Sona scoffed, “Pfft, that’s simple. Just stop pussy-footing around and ask him to fuck your brains out. He’ll do it too. Trust me, nothing feels better than basking in Master’s glory as he shoots it inside of you~”
“I would not put it so crassly but I do think Sona has the right idea,” Alastor added. “Reach deep and find the courage I know to be inside you, young Lacey. He will not refuse you. Nor you, Commissar. You are both more important to him than you realize. Your positions in his heart are already secure. You just need to step up and assume their mantles.”
“H-Hahaaa…” Lady laughed nervously. “W-Why does everyone think I have a thing for Octus? I-I’m way past my prime. It’s too late for love for me.”
Sona scoffed, “You’re not even that old, Lady. You’re like, what? 30? 35 max. Plus, love doesn’t have an expiration date. Especially not Master’s love~”
“Try 130…” Lady muttered despondently, just loud enough to be heard.
The other three fell into silence. Lacey gaped at her friend in shock. Even Sona tore her gaze from watching her master in action to stare at Lady with a new perspective. Then Alastor broke the silence.
The Custodes nodded sagely, “Rejuvenation treatments? Well, I must say, you look rather good for your age, Commissar. There is no shame in a little mileage on a woman. I know some even prefer it that way. What was it that Octus moaned during his private time? Something about MILFs, onee-sans, and dommy mommies?”
Lady flushed a vibrant red that clashed with her usual mature, teasing persona, “W-W-What was he moaning!? N-No, never mind! How is that relevant?! I-I’m not even a mother!”
Alastor shrugged with a soft rustle of his armor, “I believe the definition of MILF has expanded to not just mothers, but all desirable, experienced, older women.”
“Yeah, now that you mention it… I can see it. She has aged rather tastefully,” Sona said consideringly.
“… No. No, I refuse to believe it,” Lady was quiet for a moment before returning to her unreasonable denial. “Lacey I get. She’s young. She’s hot. And she grew up with him. She actually has a shot with Octus. But me…? Yeah, right. I’ll believe it when the Emperor tells me Himself!”
She then turned to Lacey, giving her a hug and whispering encouragement in her ears, “Go get him, tiger~ I’m sorry I won’t be able to help you but I just… I can’t… Tell me all about it, yeah? Let an old Lady live vicariously through you?”
Before Lacey could reply, her friend was already disappearing into the crowd around the training hall, discreetly wiping her eyes as she went. Lacey was left with a stabbing pain in her heart. Ever since she’d joined the Guard, Lady had been one of her emotional rocks. It hurt to see the typically upbeat Commissar like this.
“It seems this will be a two-stage seduction, Sona,” Alastor murmured, his eyes tracking Lady’s retreating back from beneath his helmet.
“Yeah,” Sona exhaled with a huff. “That didn’t go to plan. Who knew Lady would be so selfless when it came to love?”
“I do not believe that is the case. The Commissar has either been hurt before or genuinely believes that she is no longer worthy of love for some other reason. Either way, you will have your work cut out for you. Hopefully, you will be able to get your other target on board with your ‘tribute’.”
“Wait! What are you two even talking about?! Was this all some kind of setup?” Lacey asked as her hurt for Lady came out as frustration toward Sona and Alastor.
“Yes. Duh,” Sona deadpanned. “Someone as great as Master deserves tribute. He deserves worshipful harem girls and the love of thousands. You and your Commissar are just the first of my tributes to him.”
Lacey was shaken by Sona’s bluntness, “S-So… Everything you said… Was it even true?”
“Oh, it was. I just have ulterior motives. Motives that revolve around my master, not you. Your happily-ever-after just so happens to coincide with how I’m going to show my devotion to my master. He deserves nothing less~”
“Now, now, Sona,” Alastor tutted. “There is no need to be so blunt. Lacey is not your enemy. The opposite, in fact. If you want your plan to succeed, you should consider making her an ally.”
“Fineeee~” Sona pouted petulantly. “But you’re gonna deal with the Commissarial clusterfuck, Lacey. I don’t have the time or patience to deal with self-hatred and denial on that level.”
“That seems fair-…” Lacey nodded before doing a doubletake. “Wait! When did I agree to help you?”
Sona just shot her another deadpan look, “Girl… Do you want a slice of glorious Himbo pie or not?”
“Oh, uh…” Lacey warred with herself for a moment. “… I look forward to working with you.”
Sona’s smile was knowing and mischievous, “Don’t worry. Once you get a taste of Octus, you’ll be thanking me.”
Lacey resigned herself to the way things were going with a sigh. It wasn’t like she had much of a choice here. If she refused and Sona took offense to it, the Blank might try and interfere with any progress Lacey tried to make on her own. Sona might have been the lowest of Octus’s harem-totem-pole, but she was still on the inside. And she was certifiably insane as far as Lacey could tell, fanatically devoted to Octus.
Lacey figured it was better to not tempt fate. At least, Sona’s intentions seemed to be in Octus’ favor. Everything she did was for her master. And the plan couldn’t be that bad if Sona was able to get Octus’ Custodes on board with it… right?
As she agreed to join Sona’s plan for ‘tribute’, the spar between Octus and Sabine ended. Lacey didn’t catch who won but honestly, her mind was on other things at the moment. Her heart did skip a beat or two when she realized Octus was making his way in their direction.
She panicked slightly before cursing herself internally. This was Octus, her best friend. Not something to be nervous about. He was making time for her. This was what she wanted after all.
“Lacey,” Octus greeted her with that damned perfect smile on his face. “Been a while, huh? I feel like I haven’t seen ya in forever.”
Lacey tried very hard to not pout… and failed, “That’s ‘cause you haven’t… You’ve been so busy lately. It feels like you’ve forgotten your friends. You’ve gotta make time for us too, dummy.”
Octus’ smile grew sheepish but he quickly recovered, throwing an arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side fondly, “Sorry about that, Lace. Yer right. It’s just been mighty hectic. Tell ya what? I’m free right now. How ‘bout we go find Lady and catch up?”
Lacey suppressed a pleasurable little shiver at the feeling of Octus holding her so close. He made it feel so natural. Like this was where she belonged. Right by his side, pressed up against the hard, solid strength of his chest. And though he was slightly sweaty from his spar, Lacey was in heaven. Good lord, the smell! Emperor, Lacey could feel her knees going weak every time she inhaled.
And, of course, it was just her luck that things fell apart right as they were starting to get good. She opened her mouth to reply and an alarm klaxon replaced her words.
The ringing alarms blared throughout the ship, signaling… something. Lacey wasn’t sure what. She was a Guardswoman, a mere tank gunner, and Commissar’s assistant. What did she know about void ship alarms?
Octus seemed to recognize it though. Probably thanks to his lessons with the Captain… He whooped softly, squeezing Lacey’s shoulder a touch before letting go. Instead, he grabbed her hand and began pulling her along behind him.
“Octus?! What’s going on?? Are we under attack?” Lacey asked frantically as she was dragged out of the training room.
Octus laughed, “Nothing like that, Lace! C’mon, yer gonna wanna see this!”
“What’s going on?!” Lacey demanded, frustrated with Octus’ carefree attitude.
“We’re comin’ out of the Warp!”
