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KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue

🕑 Added 2024-11-02 23:44:19 +0000 UTC
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue
KYBER-PUNK 22BBY Ch.0/Prologue

Comments

DarkestCalling

Yea I won't say it doesn't feel understandable but more the abruptness of it basically in a few paragraphs she went from dieing accepting death reuniting with her mother feeling peace to being brought back and basically ready to devote herself to her new god in anyway he wished if only for a smile Basically went really heavy really fast to the point it felt unnatural like I'm expecting to find out the mc has some sorta lewd cyoa power to make it make sense or that he has a WC stamp or something Definitely feel there should have been some in and out of awareness and over time of her being healed for these feeling to settle in and solidify even if it was time skip esq of her fading in and out over a few days and each time feeling his hands slowly working to heal her and how devoted/hard he was working or something

dryskies_btb

I mean, it was kinda religious for her. Sasha had completely accepted her death. Then she greets her mom on the border of life and death and she tells her she's proud but it's not Sasha's time yet (the Force can be fucking wonky like that...). So after letting go of all of her grudges, anxieties, etc., she wakes up to kind but firm hands nursing her back to health. She'd be a saint if she DIDN'T get a bit obsessed after that. That being said, I do kinda agree with you. I'm hoping to show more of the nursing back to health process from Atom's POV in the next chapter. Hopefully, it'll feel a bit more natural once we linger in the whole process a bit more.

Gamesempie

Now that's a good start. Way to honor the original emotions of Sasha's story while using it to lead into your story.

DarkestCalling

Feel went a little too heavy on Sasha almost religious seeming awakening with his hands maybe would have been alittle better to spread the fall over a bit of time after awakening and his taking care of her

Xazo

Loved it. We gonna get another chap soon?

jp9901

Ive had a taste and now I want more

dryskies_btb

It's an interesting challenge for me. My MCs tend to be more lighthearted but I'm really going for a more serious, ruthless, ambitious/driven, and generally darker (not 'Sith evil' dark but definitely dark grey~ish alignment) approach for Atom. His isekai situation is also a bit unique, which plays into that more serious approach but that'll be elaborated on in the next chapter.

ExodiaTheForbiddenOne

Definitely in a good way gotta love a yandere e-girl lol amazing work as always !

dryskies_btb

In a good way, I hope. She had completely accepted her death at the end of that job. No intention to wake up or anything. Then she finds herself being nursed back to health and her savior turns out to be a hot broody blond dude. Hell, she fell in love with just his hands before anything else. Gotta respect that level of yandere/goudere/whatever-dere. I, for one, say go nuts Sasha. I think I'm going to have a lot of fun writing her, especially after her brush with death turns her a bit darker (party cybergoth anyone?)

ExodiaTheForbiddenOne

Damn Sasha went off the deep end

darknes12378

So far this is a great story

placid

Preach!

W T N

Looking forward to where the story goes from here

TheRavenbrand

Looks good.

Adam Daw

Is it just me or does he look a bit like a blonde Hayden Christensen in the jawline at least?

Osiris Sundavr

Did Sasha just become his personal Goudere? Nice~ Goudere definitely trumps Yandere for sure!

GoT779

Honestly interested to see your take on protagonist that’s more somber, nice prologue.

bcall092

Looking forward to seeing where this goes

Osiris Sundavr

Great name!

dryskies_btb

1: baby banddss 2: sunnyrayxo 3: Jessi_BSK 4: gigiibunny 5: peachuu 6: momokun 7: lunaticalwitch 8: styxhips


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