phillipthe2
patreon
Ua Kipaku ʻIa ʻOe
🕑 Added 2024-10-18 13:00:12 +0000 UTCSitting at her kitchen table, scrolling on her laptop, looking for a new job wasn’t all that unfamiliar to Nani. To Kalani, however…doing much the same on her cell while sprawled across Nani’s couch…looking for a job was an altogether new experience. Just the day before, the two of them were gainfully employed lifeguards at Kamaole Beach station, spending the majority of their days watching farmer-tanned tourists frolicking in the surf…and the minority of their time spent in various states of dress, seeing who could make the other ---- the fastest.
Naturally, the latter of the two was their undoing.
On the station’s tattered old couch, facing one another in a sitting scissor position, grinding their shaven mounds together, the pair are completely oblivious to the scant few beachgoers outside. It’s October and the torrent of migrating ‘snow birds’ won’t arrive for a few more weeks. Normally they would hear them first….some overweight and pasty haole** trudging up the shack's creaky, old wooden ramp. This time, however, the two of them are on the verge of screaming out the other's name, they fail to hear a pair of flip-flop-clad feet.
Mother: Don’t worry, sweetie, the nice lifeguards will make that jellyfish sting all bet…
All but hyperventilating, eyes nearly squinted shut, Nani bares down harder, grinding herself against…absolutely nothing. Nani opens her eyes to see a wide-eyed Kalani, frozen in place and staring over her shoulder. The raven-haired woman turns to see what has dumbfounded her blonde coworker…and finds a doughy mother and her young son standing in the doorway, the latter pointing at the pair with a toothy grin.
Son: Boobies.
The mother, a look of utter shock and dismay on her face, promptly clamps her hands over the child’s eyes…and just as quickly ushers him away, giving the pair of sweat-drenched lifeguards a hateful scowl before disappearing.
Kalani: We… We are sooo gonna get fired.
Not five minutes and a whirlwind of scrambling to cloth themselves, the two hear the telltale sound of a lifeguard jeep rattling down the beach…their supervisor.
With the words ua kipaku ʻia ʻoe** still ringing in her ears, Kalani rolls onto her stomach, her bare backside pointed skyward…already tired of looking at listings for waitresses, hotel housekeeping, and hula dancers. Hell, she’d been a lifeguard for so long that the only thing she has listed on her resume is just that, lifeguard. Come to think of it, she doesn’t even have a resume.
She barely wanted to roll out of bed this morning… Well, this afternoon, if she’s being perfectly honest. ..and so disheartened that, aside from the ratty old Metallica t-shirt she’d slept in, she hadn’t even bothered to put on any clothes. The only reason she’d even gotten out of bed was because of Nani’s ‘dog’…what with the staring and the whining and the drooling.
Nani on the other hand knows exactly what Stitch’s temperament is…and, from personal experience, knows exactly what will happen if you flaunt something in front of him for even the shortest time…whether you’re aware you are doing it or not. Upon hearing a certain growl of excitement from behind the couch, she turns to the blonde with a bit of concern in her eyes.
Nani: You, uhhh… You might wanna -not- lay around like that.
Kalani simply rolls her eyes, unsure of where Nani is going with this. She’s in no mood to fool around…and at this juncture, she’d just assume punch her former fellow lifeguard in the mouth.
Kalani: How the heck is that gonna help me find a job? This! That is exactly what got us into this. You... You and you're... You're... Libido!
Nani: Uhh… That’s not why I… You reeeally should put some clothes on and…
Kalani has no time to react, a blue streak bounding over the back of the couch, her eyes widening as she catches a glimpse of... Nani simply turns back to her laptop with a knowing roll of her head.
Nani: Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
*haole - outlander, a non-Hawaiian native
**ua kipaku ʻia ʻoe roughly translates as “you’re fired”.
Original Sketch by Pechi
Colors and Edits by Phillipthe2
