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Writer's Blog: Creating a Safe Space for Anonymous Feedback Without Involving Johnbob Doesmith
🕑 Added 2021-07-31 03:40:10 +0000 UTCI’m dealing with an inner ear infection that has thrown off my balance and left the world pleasantly spinny, so I’m going to keep this blog post short(ish) and then go and curl up with the newly-released game Bustafellows in bed. (One of the best things about writing IF is that I can technically claim that playing a romantic visual novel qualifies as, ahem, “field research for gaming development.”)
First off: Hope and John’s interview will be posted tomorrow, so you all have until 7am Chicago Time when I wake up to add any last-minute questions (the “meat” of the interview is completely written, but I could use some more lighthearted questions to help facilitate transitions). There’s been a learning curve to writing an interview with three people, as the flow from one topic to the next can’t rely as heavily on back-and-forth banter and jokes.
Second order of business: I’m announcing a new way for Patrons to provide anonymous feedback on Mind Blind’s demo via Mindblindbetatest@gmail.com(which is also the email I’ll be using once I get official beta testing rolling).
For now, though, this email is specifically designated so that people can anonymously provide higher-level feedback on sensitive topics. Bug/Typo reporting is best done either via discord or Tumblr.
The reasoning for this email address: I’ll be blunt and admit in that the prospect having conversations about any semi-serious issue on Tumblr terrifies me. I’m much less guarded here on Patreon, but Tumblr is The Wild West. Prior to posting Mind Blind, I didn’t have any social media accounts, and it all often still feels very overwhelming. Some anon messages that I’ve received on Tumblr have been hard to mentally bounce back from (no, random stranger whom delights in messaging me vitriolic hate mail twice weekly, the inclusion of Rosy’s romance does not make me a predator who should be fired from teaching kids).
Please don’t get me wrong! 99.9999% people who reach out are wonderful and delightful and incredibly kind and I love interacting with them, but the internet is still . . . well, it’s The Internet. Podium Users exist.
In recent months, I’ve considered blocking anonymous comments on Tumblr due to a few (unfortunately persistent) meanie-pants, but I also receive a lot of well-thought-out feedback from readers who didn’t want their usernames to be public (presumably for some of the same reasons I try to be careful about what gets posted). I really want to be able to read these criticisms, especially when they point out potential gaps in my knowledge. Sometimes, I have follow-up questions to anonymous feedback that unfortunately I can’t ask without publicizing the entire conversation. I want to learn and do better, or at least fully understand the issue to make an informed decision, even if my viewpoint ultimately diverges. But I’d rather the conversation be one-on-one.
Not because I plan on acting like a jerkity jerk behind closed doors and want to trap you in my evil lair while pretending that I’m perfect in public, but because it’s less stressful and more productive for me to ask questions in a conversation where I and the other person can give each other the benefit of the doubt without worrying about Johnbob Doesmith the Internet Troll deliberately misinterpreting our words and spewing hate into my inbox. Because I simply don’t have the capacity to deal with any more of that. Unfortunately, it only takes one person being relentlessly ugly to negatively impact my headspace—and “headspace” is super important when working on a creative project. Logically, I know that internet trolls shouldn’t be taken seriously, but emotionally some comments take their toll.
Unfortunately, whereas I can privately respond to messages with names, anonymous messages sent via Tumblr don’t allow me to ask you follow-up questions outside the public spotlight. All this means that if you send me anonymous feedback and it’s about a deeper-than-Deep-Dish topic, I likely won’t publicly respond. Not responding is a lose-lose situation, though, as you may believe that your helpful opinion is being ignored (it’s not), and I’m unable to request clarification . While my DMs are always open, I understand that not everyone will feel comfortable disclosing their online identity in order to provide feedback, especially when it comes to sensitive topics that risk revealing personal details.
Mindblindbetatest@gmail.com is my attempt to fix this issue, since it allows Patrons to reach out via a burner email address and share feedback that they’re not comfortable attaching their names too and allowing me to ask for any follow-up questions. My hope is that it provides a safe space for you guys to anonymously reach out, while also protecting me from having to deal with trolls like Johnbob Doesmith (which is what I’ve named my “I’m going to report you to Child Protective Services” anon).
. . . Well, this post didn’t end up being all that short. I also may have overshared, for which I’m blaming the ear infection.
Comments
Cas
I turned anon off years ago and have never looked back— honestly, I found the nasty ones made even the nice anon msgs just not worth it in my case :/
Jo O'Connor
Tumblr or one of the discord servers would be best for this! I try to address quick fixes asap :)
Skippy Hugo
Sounds alright. Hope your ear infection clears up quickly. I also do have feedback on typos in the two latest chapters, but I'll head over to tumblr to message those.
Bluebell09
I'm sorry you get those awful messages so often, Jo. It can really mess with your state of mind reading that crap. I think you've found a really good solution and it shows you've put some thought into it and value all the feedback you receive. I hope you feel better soon, have plenty of rest! ❤
Kian
Would it be helpful or annoying if I recorded all the times I notice grammar or typo issues (not like, oh this sentence could be worded like this, but specifically say I’ve noticed a couple of times where the grammar for neutral pronouns hasn’t been correct or there’s been an apostrophe missing or something. I think I’ve recorded a couple but for the most part I’ve never come forward to be like I noticed this!! Because I know it’s probably not your highest priority right now and might just be a bit more irritating than helpful currently.
Liberty
I don't mind the oversharing. I too, am known to sometimes partake in emotionally slutty behavior, but y'know it's good to get that kind of stuff off your chest, so I think every one of us are good with you sharing what's up ♡ the Gmail is a good idea though 👍🏻hope you get better soon!
Jo O'Connor
Blocking works for a day or two but then it's back to the same nonsense. I refuse to respond to the comments, but it does grow wearisome. As for making sure emails are anonymous: just make sure to send it from a burner email address like the post says! It takes around 1 minute to create a new Gmail address, and you can just type in a bunk name. It's not the most sophisticated method, alas, but it was the best I could figure out :)
lahtays
im so sorry to hear about the anon trouble jo and i hope you're doing ok! a few terminally online people on tumblr tend to bypass constructive feedback and go straight to sending psychological napalm lmao 🤦♀️ you MIGHT be able to block the individual anons who are harrassing you, since it *should* also block their IP address from sending anything else, but tumblr's blocking system is notoriously terrible so don't quote me on that ! but regardless i really really like the idea of an anonymous email system that's safe for everyone involved — and it's very reassuring to know when authors care about such things and are listening out in good faith ❤ i'm on mobile right now so i might be missing something super obvious, but are there any specific steps one needs to take in order to ensure any feedback is sent anonymously? or is the sender's email address concealed automatically? i'm not particularly worried about my own anonymity but i just thought i'd ask in case anybody else is as clueless as i am 😅
Hannya
The warped logic of the antis: any age difference = inherently predatory relationship. That it starts out as teacher-student as well just makes it extra abusive. Also, fiction has a 1:1 relation to reality, so writers of fiction are 100% advocating for their subject matter in real life. Neo-puritans are infuriating and should be ignored on every occasion.
Here's some lighthearted questions if you still need them :) 1. John, have you improved upon your fruitcake recipe? Or at least made it edible? 2. What were your opinions of ment hell ice slum? 3. When did you guys know that the other was the one for you? Who proposed?
I mean I can get side-eyeing Rosy as a romance option. Age gaps in real life can be huge red flags, as can student-teacher relationships. There's an undeniable and nigh insurmountable difference in power dynamics at work there. But also... it's fiction? A choose your own adventure work of fiction at that. Not only do you not have to read it, you can lead the narrative away from it if it makes you feel icky! Also I wrote like 6 paragraphs of rambling "fiction is a safe place to explore unsafe topics" and "have we not all read messed up fanfics filled with kidnapping or torture or character death or worse and are those things not more egregious than a 10 year age gap between consenting adults" but... yeah. I think you get the point.
rachel
Wow, I’m so sorry you’re exposed to that much (and type of) harassment. People overstep their boundaries way too much, and I can’t imagine how emotionally draining it can be to have to read through all the cruelty/nastiness. Our brains seem especially hardwired to zone in on the negative messages too, so I hope, at the very least, you feel a lot of support and love from your community + circle offline. Also, someone may have to correct me on this, but I believe there’s a way to block certain IP addresses on tumblr from sending you messages, even on anon? In addition, I think the email is a great idea in general for more in-depth feedback! MB is such a stand out because of its incorporation of sensitive topics, but being able to ask follow-up questions to reader feedback is super important too. Sending you lots of support ❤️
Jaime Ford
I don't understand the trolls thought process...Button is an adult unless I've misread something...I definitely had a teacher who ended up marrying a former student when she was like 22 or so and he was still a younger teacher and no one batted an eye about it cause she was an adult. Don't let the idiot get to you!
rasehum hiyuki
Alright! :d
