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Defeating Your Inner Demons
🕑 Added 2021-10-28 01:46:23 +0000 UTCI'm doing my best to get the update posted tonight, but I had one of my famous (infamous?) last minute epiphanies. So it'll probably be up at midnight at the earliest 😅
(I swear that I'm doing my best to keep deadlines, but pre-update adrenaline nerves often leads to last-minute creative bursts. Insert cliched phrase about being "merciless in the face of my muse blahblahblah" here.)
WARNING: MEGA SPOILERY BITS
Originally in this chapter, Noh simply used Button to track Nick's location. There was some flowery language and psychic woohoo handwavey explanation, but Button played a passive role that never felt fully satisfying to me during my trial playthroughs.
Around two hours ago, inspiration struck to make Button proactive and to deepen their character arc. Now, Noh needs Button to follow the echoes of Nick's thoughts, selecting them from the crowd of Ment voices that Noh can hear while in Button's mind.
To explain via metaphor: when Ment's overhear Button's thoughts, they're entering into Button's airspace (Brainspace? Mindzone? Hemosphere Atmosphere?). And when Noh pushes outward while attached to Button (looking for Nick), too many airplanes flying overhead makes it impossible for Noh to identify Nick's jet. Button, however, is very familiar with Nick's jet due to Nick's jet constantly invading their airspace. So Noh needs Button to identify which thoughts are Nicks, using a convenient multiple-choice framework that just so happens to be how interactive fiction works in the first place.
(Okay, this is a bad metaphor, but hopefully you get my point!)
Anyhow, there's a whole new sequence that I'm frantically trying to finish. It also involves Button defeating their own self doubt, which changes based off Button's stats scores. That part I just finished (although still need to edit).
The new self-doubt portion is copied below. I'm still going to get the update posted asap, but wanted to share all the mean-girl options since you won't see them all unless you codedive.
Feedback is appreciated, especially if you don't think that the option that matches your Button's stats is an intrusive thought they'd ever have! (Keep in mind that these also still need to be edited.)
* * * *
EXCERPT:
It all feels like an exercise in futility, and the silence gives voice to the worst of your self-doubts.
*if (morbidity > 70)
You should give up. You’re nothing but a gloomy little Eeyore with a cloud hanging above their head to rain on everyone else’s parade. When have you been useful even once in your life? Be realistic: you’re a narcissistic pessimist, so pathetically enraptured by your own pain that you’ve been blinded to the fact that you’re not the Gothic hero of this story.
You’re nothing more than the protagonist’s insignificant sibling.
*elseif (confidence > 70)
You should give up. It’s time to face reality: for all your false confidence, recent events have proven that you’re powerless. That you’re [i]weak[/i].
Everything that has gone wrong this past month can be traced back to your pathetic desperation to prove yourself. If you had ever once been brave enough to acknowledge your own limitations, you never would’ve joined Aeon in the first place. You would’ve moved away to a small, forgettable town where you could’ve lived the small, forgettable life. The kind of life for which you’re suited.
Instead, you arrogantly allowed yourself to be used as a weapon.
*elseif (humor > 70)
You should give up. Do you honestly believe that you’re capable of rescuing Nick? You? A painted clown who deflects from their pain with bad jokes and a self-provided laugh track? In any blockbuster movie, you’d be cast as the quirky sidekick too insignificant to even deserve your own catchphrase.
You’re not a hero; you’re nothing but a joke.
*elseif ((confidence > 35) and (morbidity > 35))
You should give up. It’s time to face reality: for all your false confidence, recent events have proven that you’re powerless. That you’re [i]weak[/i].
Your bravado is nothing more than the grotesque bloatedness of a drowned corpse too stupid to realize that they could never swim.
*elseif ((confidence > 35) and (humor > 35))
You should give up. It’s time to face reality: for all your false confidence, recent events have proven that you’re powerless. That you’re [i]weak[/i].
Did you imagine yourself to be some sort of plucky underdog? Did you think that your foolhardy bravado came across as charming because you’re willing to laugh at yourself?
Don’t be absurd. You’re not the jokester; you’re the punchline.
*elseif ((humor > 35) and (morbidity > 35))
You should give up. Do you honestly believe that you’re capable of rescuing Nick? Surely your sense of humor is dark enough to appreciate the absurdity of that delusion.
You’re not the hero in this scenario: you’re a clown carrying a rattlesnake who claims that their jokes have bite. Your failure is as inevitable as always, and it’s no longer funny.
*elseif (resentful > 70)
You should give up. You’re not a Ment; you barely even qualify as a Norm. You should’ve been a Ten given your parentage, but Fate handed Nick your birthright and gave him two powers. And now you’re supposed to somehow save him?
Who the hell do you think you are, Zero?
*elseif (resentful < 30)
You should give up. You’re an accepting person—it’s time to accept once and for all that you’re useless. You’re not a Ment; you barely even qualify as a Norm. Trying to pretend otherwise lead to you planting that bomb in the first place.
Now you’re deluded enough to believe that you can help rescue Nick? Who the hell do you think you are, Zero?
*else
You should give up. It’s time to accept once and for all that you’re useless. You’re not a Ment; you barely even qualify as a Norm. Trying to pretend otherwise lead to you planting that bomb in the first place.
Now you’re deluded enough to believe that you can help rescue Nick? Who the hell do you think you are, Zero?
Comments
I love those, but idk if the confidence one "hits the spot?" I take that the fear of a confident button is usually not being able to overcome/ being defined by their zero. That there is something wrong with them and they'll never be up to the task of joining Aeon etc. Current one is still good tho, they all are
"Who the hell do you think you are, Zero?" Is just. Such a powerful line?? It hits with that oomph that causes me to shatter into a million sobbing pieces. Also the rattlesnakes and jokes that bite bit has me in stitches idk why I laughed so hard at it but I did
Skippy Hugo
One, they ALL have an appropriate amount of bite. But, my mind keeps reading them in my 'Noh' voice. Two, something that's more of a me thing is my self-doubt taking on a life of it's own. Almost like how you have an angel and a devil on your shoulder. Really makes the struggle feel more personal.
cinnerman
Same. All of these break my heart
cinnerman
OW?????
Amni
the "who the hell do you think you are, zero?" part really breaks my heart 😠but i also love pain so i know im gonna enjoy this
rasehum hiyuki
God my heart is hurting-
Delfunia
They all hit right in the feels but the ones that end with "who the hell do you think you are, Zero?" 💔💔💔 Damn why you hurting me like this ðŸ˜
Electra Heart
THE OPTIONS OMFG
Samantha Murphy
The options are so good omg
