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Chapter 06: I guess we’re all Monsters
🕑 Added 2024-10-31 17:16:11 +0000 UTCChapter 06: I guess we’re all Monsters
Lelouch's words felt like a slap. Nunnally tried to control her tears. She wouldn’t cry when she had done her best to be strong during the call. But now she wondered if she ever knew him, as he sounded so angry. It was like he was struggling to control himself. It wasn’t like his reaction at the summit. She had thought he sounded like he was putting on an act, lying without saying the words.
It wasn’t like he didn’t sound upset, but he was trying to amplify that mild annoyance into outrage. But just now, he…it felt like it was an understatement as for as much as that was, even as he dismissed her as a non-threat, it was like there was something more, an ocean's worth of fury that she couldn't even begin to understand.
'Was…was that always there? Did I never notice that he felt like that?' She asked herself, hearing Mr. Ried and Mr. Maldini leaving; with the two gone, her siblings instantly turned to her, their concern palpable.
“Are you all right, Nunnally?” Cornelia asked. Her anger at their brother was forgotten, if only for a moment.
Grasping her other hand, Schneizel conveyed a similar amount of worry. "That must have been hard for you. I thought showing him the power of the FLEIJA and our determination to stop him would be enough, but…" He stopped. Even as a boy, Lelouch was overly protective of Nunnally. His risking a meeting with Suzaku proved his protective instinct stronger than ever. Still, for him to so quickly adapt…he was more of a threat than he already believed.
Letting go of Nunnally's hand, he got up, but she asked him a question. “Schneizel, are the people of Pendragon really all right?”
"You needn't worry; we gave a warning well in advance. The city was significantly damaged, but we did our best to limit that," Schneizel replied. However, Cornelia looked at him in disbelief and suspicion.
Nunnally unaware of her thoughts, she focused on the future. "But now we have to use them on people, on Lelouch and his followers," she lowered her head, thinking of something Schneizel’s spies had told them about and confirmed just now. Even Leila…" Why? First, her brother turned into this, and then Suzaku followed him down that dark path, but even Leila, too?
“If they stand in the way of world peace, we’ll have no choice.” Schneizel seemed sad, and Cornelia suspected he was, though not for the reasons that Nunnally would, as she understood her brother better. He understood right from wrong, but he had always been distant from others; life itself held little meaning to him outside of what a person could do; for him, it was merely a waste of resources, nothing more.
Nunnally, too, had thoughts on their brother, but the one they opposed, as she recalled with a shiver the fury in his condemnation of her. "Schneizel, I have a request. Can I be the one who holds onto the FLEIJA launch key?"
At this, Schneizel was truly surprised, as Nunnally was. She had to know what she was asking and understand that they would use them again, and if she held the key, she would be who pressed the button.
Nunnally could detect the stunned confusion from her siblings; she couldn't fault them for it as she hated it. She wished she hadn't said it but wouldn't take it back. "I…I can't fight battles or defend my country or comrades like Nelly, and I can't lead people or create amazing plans to victory like you, but" She paused. "At the very least, I can't just sit here and let you handle it all while I sit in an ivory tower.”
"Nunnally, you shouldn't let his words get to you; he was completely out of line." Cornelia's hold on her hand tightened, but she kept it gentle so as not to hurt her, a gesture that Nunnally appreciated and hated in equal measure, as it showed Cornelia care. Still, she didn't think she could take something as small as a squeezed hand when they were at war.
"But he wasn't wrong, was he, sister? Please, let me have this sin if only that." She asked once more, wanting to solve the issue. To prove to her brother and herself that she could do it. She might be unable to leave her tower, but she won't be some object.
“Very well, I have my reservations, but if you're truly committed, I won't refuse." Schneizel relented, to which Nunnally gathered her courage.
“I am.” The young princess nodded, but Cornelia had something of her own to ask Schneizel.
“Schneizel, could we have a word?”
Line Break
The call had ended almost a minute ago. Still, nothing had been said since Leila, Suzaku, and C.C. watched as Lelouch pulsated with raw anger. Suzaku would be lying if he said he didn't get it, as he might hate Lelouch, but he understood him just as well. Lelouch had based his life around protecting Nunnally and creating a world for her, so for her to reject that and him...would be a heavy blow.
Like Lelouch, he was relieved to see Nunnally alive and well, joyful even as it was a weight off his already stained soul. It was selfish, but he was glad he didn't have that in common with Lelouch, the blood of an innocent princess. But that joy, like many things he loved, turned sour as Nunnally declared herself their enemy while standing with Schneizel; there is no doubt that the snake had something to do with it.
With Leila, she was saddened by the sight of the girl, as she remembered Nunnally fondly. She had mourned her twice: when they were exiled and again when she returned to Pendragon and heard the details of the second battle of Tokyo. She didn't want to fight her any more than she would fight her friends and comrades in arms, but much like her time in the army, she had little control over the opponent or mission.
"You have guests, don't you? Why don't you attend to them?" C.C. broke the silence, both Suzaku and Leila looking at her like she was mad. Still, Lelouch responded to her suggestion, taking a breath and releasing it like a safety valve that had been pulled. His fury cooled and fell back to manageable levels.
"Yes, I'll do that, but we're meeting on the Avalon to discuss this in detail," Lelouch replied, his tone controlled and confident, as one would expect from the man who wore the crown. However, there was an undercurrent, which they all picked up on. They said nothing as they confirmed the meeting and sighed off.
Like Break
Rivalz could admit that he was nervous. Who wouldn't be when they were riding on the personal transport to the Emperor? Sure, the guards didn't act aggressively, and the one who collected them was friendly. However, they were still elites protecting the highest-ranking man in the empire.
A man who happened to be his friend. Rivalz struggled to comprehend what was happening. Since when was Lelouch royalty? How’d he kill his dad? Why’d he kill him? Why did the rest of the royal family just…accept that?
Was he still the same person he knew? He didn't know and wanted to find out, so he made the admittedly dumb move of scaling the wall at Ashford to try and talk to him. In hindsight, he was lucky he wasn't arrested, but it worked…somehow.
When the door opened with a hiss and click, his head shot up as the man of the hour walked in, tall and as strong as an emperor should be, but when he looked at him and Nina, a little bit of the guy he knew shined through in how lip curled. His eyes brightened, if only a little.
"I guess I should apologize for cutting contact like that and just showing back up out of the blue to snatch you up," Lelouch stated, pointedly not taking a seat.
"I think it's more than an apology, Your Majesty." Rivalz joked, taking it in stride or at least trying not to pull his hair out. “I swear, you get involved in the wackiest stuff. Don’t know how you plan on topping this.”
Lelouch let out a small but relieved and honest laugh at that. Even before he became Zero, he seemed to always get involved in something and revel in it. It was a means for him to remind himself that he was lying, as only the living could feel such a rush of excitement, anger, and fear when their existence was on the line.
"I doubt that I can, not unless I become emperor of the world," Lelouch replied, playing along as Nina watched the two. The girl could tell how strained things were between them and wondered when one would finally broach the topic.
That proved to be Rivalz, who had gone too long without answers. "Yeah, that might be it, but…you never told me you were a royal." He looked away at that.
Lelouch didn't disparage him for that; he knew that he hurt him by doing that. "It…it wasn't something I wanted them to know because I never wanted to return to this life. And for what it's worth, you were wonderful friends."
That was always true, ever since his bastard of a father told him what it meant to be a royal in Britannia. Despite the reforms he had forced through and the fact he was cleaning up the system with acid and sandpaper, he still felt uncomfortable with the crown on his head.
Seeing that Rivalz wasn’t going to speak, Nina asked another damning question, one based on what they heard his guards talking about. “Is Pendragon…?”
Lelouch turned his gaze to her, sympathetic, which only made her feel all the more dreadful. "It's true, Pendragon was hit by a FLEIJA, one far stronger than the first. Because of that, we'll be lucky if even 5% of the city's population still lives."
Hearing that robbed Nina of all her strength, crushing her spirit as she had feared it would happen again, all because…all because she was too blind to consider the implications. Because she wanted Zero dead so severely, she stopped caring about collateral.
"Nina," she heard a voice, strong and bright in the darkness of her sorrow. Looking up, she saw that she had fallen to her knees, sweaty and shaking, with Lelouch kneeling before her, a gentle hand on her shoulder.
"You aren't to blame for this. This was Schneizel’s work. You couldn't possibly have known he would even consider it." He was firm as ever, yet even though he was like a lighthouse in a stormy sea, she struggled against the bumbling, violent waters.
“I knew I was creating a weapon, and weapons exist to kill, to hurt. I knew that…and yet…and yet,” She started getting smaller before exploding outwards in rage and grief that she had been keeping suppressed since then because she didn't have the right to feel such. Still, she couldn't hold it any longer. "I'm a monster! I pushed so hard for Suzaku to carry it into battle! I used Euphemia's name to make him do it; what kind of person does that? Not a good one!"
Crying now, she continued to state her sins. “When he was fighting over the settlement, I begged him to use it to kill Zero. I didn't care…I didn't care, and then…I saw it, and I knew…"
“I knew I was a monster.” She, not Suzaku. She, no Schneizel, Nina, and Nina killed those people when she handed soldiers and politicians the greatest tool for mass murder ever created. Now…now she can only watch as the fruits of her labor bring all humanity nothing but ruin, death, and suffering.
Lelouch pulled back from her as she broke down, if only because Rivalz was there to take his place. But he also did so because he knew what he was about to do wouldn't be pretty.
“If you’re a monster, then so am I.” He started, drawing their attention to him as he stepped back. "I know a thing or two about hate. How can it fuel you and give you purpose but can just as easily blind you to the cost of that hatred and the burden of knowing that, yet still being unable to stop yourself?"
Regrets and mistakes he could never make vanish. Lives lost that he could never return. "Yes, you're a monster…and I am the monster that created you, for I, too, realized too late the cost of my actions when I killed Shirley’s dad.” Both Rivalz and Nina's eyes widened at that. Mr. Fenette was killed by the Black Knights…by Zero.
They weren't stupid, and Lelouch didn't treat them as such, not when he saw the dawning realization and horror in their eyes. "And when, through my mistakes, I gunned down Euphemia.”
“Wait…but Zero…” Nina's world started crumbling, just like when she learned Kallen was a half-blood, but Lelouch? She had known him for years, he…he couldn't…but he was Emperor now, hadn't he killed to secure that position.
“Yes, the one who was Zero, who killed two royals and waged a war against Britannia…was me.” Lelouch shot down any doubt.
"If you doubt my words, you can speak with Kallen or Suzaku; both can confirm that." With that, Nina screamed out, rage consuming her as she lunged at him, only to be held back by René, whom both civilians had forgotten had been present the entire time.
“Release her.” Lelouch surprised them with his order.
“But sir-” Lelouch shook his head. He understood why the knight acted, but this…this was something that had to happen.
"Do it. She deserves that much." As soon as Nina was released, she screamed and tackled him to the floor, her hands already around his neck as she choked the life out of him. Lelouch let out gasps of air but didn't fight back. Instead, he focused on her eyes, on how jumbled, sorrowful, and outraged they were.
It was the same look he saw in Suzaku whenever he let his mask of complete rage or apathy fall. It was the face that looked back at him in the mirror.
Rivalz wanted to act, as this was insane; she couldn't just kill him, but the knight held him back, though he looked just as uncomfortable.
Nina didn't see that; she wouldn't care if she did, as her focus remained on the man who took her savior from her—on the man who lied to her and everyone. She leaned close to him, loosening her grip just a bit to give him just a little oxygen, but tight enough that she could strip him of that just as fast.
“You killed Euphemia.” She seethed, hot tears in her eyes falling onto his melancholy face.
“I did.” He gasped out, Nina's eyes turning into pinpoints. Still, her fury washed away almost as fast, leaving her with only grief and turmoil as she stopped strangling him, falling onto his chest as she beat her fist into it, over and over.
“Why? Why did she have to die? Why did she have to die?! It's not fair. It's just not fair!" She cried, grief, sorrow, and rage, feeling hollow. Lelouch remained still, not caring for his bruised neck as he eventually moved, hugging Nina and trying to offer some warmth. Some sort of rock in the storm.
"It wasn't. If any of my siblings deserved better…it was her, " he softly uttered. I never wanted to hurt you or our friends, but in the end, I just played into how unfair the world is."
Line Break
A couple hours later, as they approached the Avalon, the trio were silent. Lelouch sat on one side, Rivalz and Nina on the other. They hadn't spoken a word to each other since Nina had managed to compose herself, at least enough not to be crying, and he explained everything to them.
As the pilot announced they'd be landing soon, Rivalz finally broke the silence. "I…I don't know what to say." He stated, skeptical about geass until Lelouch used it on his bodyguard to make him dance like a fool who wasn’t happy that was what he was made to do.
"That was…expected. It's a lot to just hear." Lelouch replied, his fingers locked over his crossed legs.
"So…you want another war then? What does that have to do with me? You didn't just grab me to have a talk. You don't work like that, Zero.” Nina challenged.
“I do want war, and thanks to the Black Knights and Schneizel, I shall have that war. As for you, I need your assistance with the FLEIJA issue.” When Lelouch replied, Nina jumped to her feet, her eyes awash with fury
"I'd rather die than make more of them! Not even if you geass me into it!"
“Calm down, Nina. I don’t want more of them. I need your help finding a way to counter them. If anyone can do that, it would be the mother of the beast, right?" Lelouch raised his hands to placate her. "Believe me, I'm not some saint who believes weapons should be abolished; they're, at the end of the day, tools. But the FLEIJA…it's too powerful, too destructive…it will destroy everything.”
“If you needed my help, why did you tell me you're Zero? I made…I opened Pandora's box, trying to kill you." Nina asked, knowing she could just as quickly refuse to help him out of spite. Rivalz watched the back-and-forth with intrigue, as this might be the most they had talked to one another.
"You could, especially since you now know who I am and who I was," Lelouch agreed.
“And yet you still told me.” Her eyes narrowed.
Lelouch blinked, a sense of iron honesty coming into his gaze. “Because if nothing else, you deserve to hear the truth from me, though I can’t say either of you can still call me your friend after learning all that.”
Nina…didn't have much of a response to that, as sure at Ashford he was somewhat goofy and more than willing to be a trickster to get his way or just get whatever whims Milly ordered done, but he had never been this open.
But then again, if his life had been as chaotic as she claimed, then it would make sense he would try a different approach, even if his goals remained caked in violence. “And if I wasn’t with Rivalz today?”
Lelouch nodded towards Rivalz. "Then I would have asked him for help tracking you down, as we need a countermeasure for the FLEIJA."
“Nina.” Speaking of, the boy placed a hand on his friend's shoulder, as he had reservations about…all of this, but he wanted her to know this was her choice. Even if he had to fight Lelouch on that, if she said no, then that was that. But he hoped she didn't, as he had seen how torn up she had been since Tokyo.
“I’ll do it, but!” Nina stopped Lelouch before he could speak, glaring at him with renewed anger. “Not for you, I need to atone for my sins as well, and if I can start doing that by helping you defeat Schneizel and his FLEIJA, then I can stomach it.”
Despite that, Lelouch still smiled at her as he accepted her terms with a handshake, the transport touching down in the hanger of the Avalon.
Line break
The meeting had ended half an hour ago, with Lelouch having been gone almost as long, but there was still plenty to do. In the meantime, the UFN supreme council had chewed out the Black Knights for their interference, putting the blame for heightened international tensions squarely on them. Not even Kaguya escaped scrutiny, with some floating the idea that perhaps it was unwise to have a child be their chairwoman, which she would need to deal with, or else she would be outed in a vote of no confidence at a critical time for the UFN.
Kallen escaped any blowback as she was considered low-level enough not to be part of the command. However, that never-ending 15-minute dressing down made clear that the UFN demanded change. Xingke stepping down might have appeased the Emperor, but in the words of the German delegations, they weren't Prussia; they refused to be run by the army.
Things could have gotten worse if they hadn't received news about Pendragon and how many in the supreme council expressed that they would be held liable; Kallen was stone-faced as others got nervous, as she had known that already, having come to trust that when Lelouch made a prediction, nine times out of ten, it came true. It postponed any real talks of swapping out BK leadership for more 'compliant' officers.
She quickly made her way down beneath the school as they had stationed her Guren there, along with other units, just in case something went down, a god-send as if it would have been hard for her to complete her mission if it had been stationed on the Ikaruga. As she was approaching it, she was stopped.
“Kallen,” Minami called out, making her stop with her back to him. "I've been looking for you. We need to discuss what we will do now and figure out a way forward before we find ourselves fighting Britannia.”
Minami was someone she cared for; she had known him for years. But the same could be said for the rest of the command made from her brother’s cell, and that didn’t stop them from pointing guns at her because she wanted to let their leader defend himself.
No, this was the right way forward. They had their chance and blew it. More than that, she felt no hesitation or doubt for the first time since Tokyo.
"Thanks for being a friend, Minami." Without hesitation, she turned to the surprised man, her gun drawn and fired twice. One hit him in the shoulder, the other in his side, dropping the man with a cry of pain and shock. The gunfire alerted others, who came running and yelling, but she ignored them as she turned and quickly ran for the Guren.
Minami, still on the floor holding his bleeding shoulder, couldn't believe what had just happened. "Did he get to you, too? Was this part of that monster's plans?" he yelled at her. Kallen grabbed her grappling line and turned to him as she ascended into the cockpit. She didn't have time to refute his accusation, and even if she did, she understood they would never believe her.
Closing the cockpit as guns were drawn on her, she powered up the unit. She destroyed the two Akatsuki's that had been next to her, leaving just 4 other units whose pilots were still scrambling to as she took off, her 9th gen machine faster than anything they could order to chase her. Milly watched the Guren flying away from the school and wondered what was happening, especially as she also picked up how the Black Knights panicked. Was this related to the rumors?
As she raced away from the Tokyo settlement, she might have left behind any knightmares that could give chase, but that didn't mean her radio was silent, as not even a minute into her defection did they try to contact her. Ohgi finally got through, using some back channel that bypassed her needing to accept it.
His face appeared on her screen, worried and angry. “Kallen, what are you doing? You shoot Minami?!” Ohgi yelled at her.
“I did. I’m leaving the Black Knights, Ohgi. I just can’t stand alongside you anymore.” Kallen replied
Hearing that, Ohgi’s eyes widened as betrayal and hurt formed in them, but then it was consumed by rage as he slammed his hand onto the console before him. "It was Lelouch, wasn't it? He used his geass on you when he requested that stupid walk around the school!” Kallen snarled back at him, sick and tired of them making assumptions about him! About her!
“He didn’t use it to make leave!” She yelled back at him.
“So, he did use it!”
“My actions are my own! They’ve always been my own and continue to be my own!” Her roar silenced him, as Kallen was nothing if not blistering, a force of nature when she set her mind to something or spoke her views and thoughts.
And right now, her ire was directed towards the man she thought of as a brother but had been so willing to kill her that day and now unwilling to accept that she could choose to leave them; those two things made her choice all the easier.
"I'm doing what I'm doing because that is what my heart wants, and if you can't accept that, it's your problem!" She cut off the call before he could say more than enraged her, before shutting off her comes to keep him or anyone else from trying to talk to her as she flew over the open water, Jap…Area 11 fading away behind her.
But it wouldn't be that simple as while she could out-ran any knightmare without trying, the same wasn't valid for fighter jets as her radar picked up 3 squadrons heading towards her. No doubt from the ships the UFN had stationed close to Area 11 for the meeting.
"They won't give up, will they?" She mused as she spotted them overtaking her and coming around to try and intercept her, so she turned her radio back on, using an official Black Knight channel. "I'll only say this once: Get out of my way, or you’ll regret it.” She warned, but it fell on deaf ears as they continued their approach, one going so far as to fire a missile at her.
It was an exceptionally dull affair to handle them, dodging everything they threw at her as she took out her would-be interceptors. Though she felt terrible when she noticed that a few never ejected in time, they made their choice. She made hers as she continued her journey, speeding up as she crossed out of Area 11's territorial waters. After around 20 minutes, her radar spotted her goal.
A Britannian fleet.
'A couple months back, I would be fighting them, but my life has never been normal.' She thought to herself as she started to see the vessels on her cameras and the floating fleet overhead. When she saw that knightmares were being launched, she made a mental note to punch Lelouch for not telling his people to expect her, but she slowed down.
Spotting 3 dozen Vincents and half as many Gareths making their way to her, armed and ready, she switched to another channel Lloyd and Cecile had installed when they briefly had the Guren. "Attention, this is Kallen Stadtfeld. I'm not your enemy, I repeat, I am not your enemy. I've defected from the Black Knights and come bearing clearance codes given to me by his majesty, the Emperor."
In response to her declaration, the units halted. Kallen didn't need to see their faces to know they were caught off guard by that, wondering if it was some sort of ploy. At the same time, they must have known about her skill. What pilot didn't know of the Devil's Right Hand? So why would she need or want to use such tricks when she could have fought them?
Not even 30 seconds later, the Lancelot was flying towards her, stopping at the front of its forces, staring the Guren down like it had done many times since the two machines met at Narita.
Neither spoke, not because they didn't know what to say, but because they had too much to say. There was bad blood between them, enough to fill a lake. Eventually, Lancelot turned to return to the Avalon. "Follow me, Kallen.”
“But my lord.” One of the Vincents spoke up, the rest keeping an eye on Kallen but also keeping their distance, a wise choice if she had to say.
“If she has what she claims, she must be given safe passage. Is that understood, captain?” Kallen bet that Suzaku, on some level, loved ordering Britannian around, having gotten that power he had wanted for so long.
“Y-yes, my lord.” Cowed, the knightmares didn't give them any issues as she silently followed the Lancelot till they arrived on the Avalon, with this being Kallen's second time on the vessel and the first time not while she was restrained.
Powering down the Guren, she disembarked onto the gangway, seeing Suzaku already turning to her. The man still hadn't gone into battle in full knight of one regalia, cape included. She was silent as Suzaku watched her, trying to find something, perhaps her reason. His gaze went to her eyes more than once, which she found insulting, but Suzaku was an idiot.
“Why?” He eventually asked.
"I could ask you that. I thought you hated Lelouch, yet here you are, killing his enemies and helping to secure his power." She shot back at him, Suzaku turning to walk away. He could have told her to follow, but they both knew how little she cared for him or his instructions, so she followed without needing to be said.
As they exited the hangar and journeyed deeper into the ship, Kallen ignored how people stopped to look at her, dressed in Black Knight uniform yet walking with the Knight of One. "I follow because I will be able to achieve what I desire because someone I care for asked me to set aside my hate to build a better world." He answered her question.
"Funny, Lelouch said the same thing." Suzaku missed a step at that, Kallen smirking at the fact he didn't know about that, but she shrugged. "As for me, I'm just following my heart, nothing more." Suzaku snorted at her reasoning, finding her individualistic thinking wanting, but that was the conflict between them, wasn't it? He believed in collectives and systems because he didn't trust his judgment; she believed in individuals and ideals because she couldn't trust others to do it for her.
Nothing more was said as they walked. The two understood how bizarre it was for them to work together when they would rather kill each other, but they also understood how little that would achieve. Besides, if the world they both wished for was to be realized, they would need to find alternatives to taking up the blade and create a world where tolerance existed, giving way to talking and understanding.
Eventually, they reached their destination, the boardroom aboard the Avalon, where Lelouch, Leil, and C.C. waited for them. The green-haired woman gave Kallen a look that said more than words but turned away almost as fast. Lelouch hardly acknowledged them as he sat in his chair, the screens on display the faces of three other knights of the round. The only one she recognized was Jeremiah.
Akito, the new knight of three, hardly reacted to Kallen's presence other than noting it. Jeremiah, the knight of two, was clearly suspicious of her having known of her now former ties to the Black Knights. Still, as his majesty had invited her, he kept his opinions silent. It was only Ashley who seemed to have a positive reaction to her, the Knight of four laughing when he recognized her.
“Well, what do we have here? The Devil's Right Hand? And I don't see any cuffs, so is she a new hire? Damn, I was looking forward to fighting her.”
Kallen noted that no one corrected or admonished her fellow redhead for his comment; Lelouch didn't even seem to hear it as he sat with his fingers interlocked, his frame stiff, with little sign of life. Suspecting Kallen's concern, Leila filled her in on what happened with Nunnally and how once he sat for the meeting, he's been silent since.
“It was good for you to finally have an honest conversation with Nunnally, but perhaps we were too harsh," C.C. spoke up, leaving Suzaku wondering what her goal was as she kept him from stopping the conversation.
"You don't seem surprised that Nunnally is alive, C.C." Lelouch turned her eye her way, but C.C. hardly cared.
"Sayoko already explained things, remember. Besides, you've 'died' twice now and came back." She retorted, Lelouch frowning as C.C. leaned back in her chair. "However, are you this messed up about it? It's not the first time you've fought siblings." Kallen stepped forward to get her to be a little kinder about it, as this wasn't Clovis or Cornelia; this was Nunnally, someone they all knew to be better than her elder siblings.
Lelouch beat her to it when he let out a bark of laughter, but one that held no amusement, just bitter anger. "Yes, I've battled siblings many times and killed two of them. I feel little for Clovis as the man I recalled wasn't the man I killed. And I'll never let myself forget or forgive that I ruined Euphemia's name. But all that was for the goal of creating a world for Nunnally, someone that was better than the rest of us damned royals."
He closed his eyes, his frame shaking with an untold cocktail of emotion. "I even planned Zero's exile from Area 11 because I didn't want to fight her because it could only have one outcome, and now Schneizel’s forced my head and put me at a crossroads: Achieve a better world, one that would produce anymore broken people like us, or let the world continue to be broken to protect the person that for the longest time, was the reason I continued to live in a world ruled by suffering and greed.”
Leila placed a hand on his and worried for him. "What will you do?" She asked as he turned to her, his gaze haunted, bitter but resigned.
"I've already made my choice. I made it the day I took the throne, and I can't stop now. I can't treat Nunnally any differently, not anymore. If I did, it would insult the sacrifices, which infuriates me more than anything. Imagine that she still turns on me after all those years of caring for and loving her.”
"It's normal for a parent to be angry with a child that doesn't know better," Akito stated, though no one corrected him, as, in a way, he was right. Lelouch had become Nunnally's parent; he had been since they were exiled, as he had become her primary caregiver, the only family she had for years.
“What’s our play now, your majesty?” Jeremiah asked.
Lelouch sighed, looking tired for the first time that day. "We always suspected Schneizel would open up with something big, just not this fast or with such a target.” He didn't care much for his relatives, but he had many who were still young and could have been taught to be better. They had been robbed of that by Schneizel, so he did the only thing he could: get revenge for that unjust action. "We'll accelerate things, but it will take time for Nina to create a countermeasure, even with Lloyd and Cecile's help."
“For the rest of you, move your third phase positions.” With that, he ended the meeting as the Knights of the Round all signed off. Suzaku excused himself, probably to speak with Cecile, leaving the Emperor with the three women. C.C. got up to approach him, but Kallen beat her to it, quickly taking the seat next to him and pulling him into a hug.
"So Nunnally's really with the other side?" she asked him softly, speaking softly into his hair, thankful that he had removed the crown. Lelouch nodded, feeling the weight of the situation on his shoulders, not for the first time, but whoever said it got easier with time was a fool, as it seemed to only get worse.
"Can you understand why I do this? Why I must walk this path?" He asked, his mind plagued with images of Euphemia, of her smile, her dreams, and her falling after he shot her, condemning her name to infamy because of poor timing and a wrong choice of words.
“I do, we do. We can't talk Schneizel down, not after he targeted civilians just to prove a point. He has to die, and…that could mean all those who follow him." Kallen soothed him, even if she knew it couldn't mean much. She had finally joined him at his side and knew all there was to him, so she'd sooner swear fealty to Charle's ghost than not do what she could.
"The world needs to change; we need a world where law and understanding rule, but that makes that, we need to punish the guilty and right now…Nunnally is among those. To show favor…" Leila took his other hand, as this wasn't easy, as ideals were beautiful, till they came at a personal cost. She had already seen what that led to in the E.U., how it betrayed its founding principles and grew complacent and comfortable, even as Britannia battered down their gates.
C.C. was next, having walked behind his seat to rest her chin on his head, her arms wrapping around him. "A world that Schneizel builds would know no progress and have no free will as people would be reduced to puppets. That isn't living. It's merely existing, accumulating knowledge."
“And so to ensure such a world can never exist…we must do what we can," Lelouch replied.
“You’re not wrong, but you’re also not alone. Let others have a little of that burden.” Kallen smiled, lifting his head to give him a kiss.
“My, quite forward, aren’t you, Kallen.” C.C. teased once the two broke apart, but Kallen only tightened her hold on him, glaring at C.C. and daring her to make a move.
“I will shoot you.” C.C. found the threat more amusing than anything else, even if Kallen knew that shooting her was more an annoyance than a genuine threat.
“Oh, calm down. I'm already sharing him; I can accept another, provided you're open to sharing our bed." Kallen blinked at that before her eyebrows shot up as she looked towards the other woman, who couldn't look her in the eye.
“Oh.”
Line Break
Well, with that other project, I might need to stop planning for it and work on the other story, as I've already plotted out 25 chapters worth of content. Do you know what episode number I've gotten to in canon? Episode 13 and even then, it's debate as so much has been changed that some events haven't happened by this point in the story. So I decided once I hit chapter 30's planned out, I'll stop as what I got is insane, like enough for months of updates. However, I spent so much time planning that that first chapter won't be up till November, which is a bummer.
As for the chapter, I had to make it longer, and even then, I didn't fit all that I wanted in it, which sucks as it means that the part that was cut would be in the next chapter. That chapter would already need to be shorter than usual to account for this.
