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Guru Survivor 2025

🕑 Added 2024-12-11 04:14:52 +0000 UTC

Comments

Jacob_3BP

I select Elon Musk, Tucker Carlson and David Sacks. I'll collaborate with the other teams to undermine them, which I'm sure they can appreciate the irony of.

Daniel Reed Miller

Each team has one member who would be quickly murdered by the other two (Nassim, Scott Adams, and Dr. K, respectively) and of the remainder, Team (anti) Science would win. As for whether Sabine or Huberman would individually survive… hard to say. Different strengths and weaknesses but I think Sabine would have a certain cold German efficiency that would see her through, especially if Hubermann tries to pull his bro science lothario charms on her.

John S Durst

Matt and Taleb would either bond or fall out hard over statistics

John S Durst

Destiny and Dawkins would be my picks too, both bloody-minded but rational. Dawkins biology knowledge useful too

Alex H

That's why he's so deadly!

Trees

Definitely team science. If I could pick my own team, it would be Oprah, Gwyneth Paltrow, Huberman. Pretty sure Oprah's security team would locate us within a week and secretly protect/feed us. Huberman is there to ward off any Scott Adams sneak attacks the first week.

Quietscheentchen

Is Dr. K an MD or a PhD? I feel like having him on would be a no brainer if it's the former. Still, voted for Matt, the only team with skin in the game

Sam Offutt

Proud of the boys for not going with the Harem strategy of Gwyneth Paltrow, Mikhaila Peterson, and maybe a Brene Brown.

Dries T.

Refreshing to hear Chris and Matt say flat out that they just really hate him. Rightly so!

Dries T.

God, Chris' bewildering selection of Scott Adams made me revisit the episode, and it's so incredibly on point. Fucking hell that guy's an insufferable insincere asshole!

Matt

Team Science Saboteurs will probably start with a campfire sing-along, but at least one will be dead by the end of the week. Probably Huberman by Sabine with a fork, for being fucking insufferable, Matt laughs and gets pissed in the foreground, Taleb is just shitting about with plants in the jungle. Team Spiritual Evolution instantly split. Dan just laughs at Brett's hat for an hour straight, then him and Eleizer make an entire tabletop RPG, with figurines, on the other side of the island, eventually dying of starvation. Brett and Dr.K attempt to psychoanalyse one another, and manage to bring about the heat death of the universe by suicide, so it can stop listening to them. Team Devious Love are 100% coming out of this an incredibly dysfunctional polycule.

Anjan Sarkar

Matt and Dan's teams will end in someone murdering someone. Love is the answer ......

Milquetoast Ramen

That Spiritual Evolution team is legitimately hilarious and potentially actually quite effective. You'd have Bret Weinstein, who probably annually takes Heather against her will into the Amazon to survive off foraging for 40 days anyway just to feed his ego, pairing with Dr. K who also has no doubt walked off into a jungle and emerged 6 months later spiritually transformed. Then they'd have Eliezer Yudkowsky building a robot to assist in their survival, or deeming the endeavor pointless given the impending AI apocalypse and would just write Harry Potter fan fiction to pass the time.

Par

dont kink shame. Chris won’t be around to fill that role 🙃

Par

@professor mittens if we’re going for chaos alone, imagine: Scott Adams, Hasan, and destiny. If there was limited food, this might be a good strategy because they would undoubtedly kill each other very quickly lol

Par

But that’s cheating. Chris specified they have to be the bad gurus ;) Also, even when I try my hardest, I can’t even imagine Dawkins uttering the phrase “fuck it, Yolo” 😆 I suspect it’s the sort of thing that if he ever did, he would instantly combust and turn into a black hole

professor mittens

yeah but Scott Adams will sabotage the entire group.

Nicholas Williams

Team ‘Fuck It YOLO’ ft Destiny, Dawkins and Dibble

Marfolini

Isn’t Taleb just a semi - fat guy in his sixties?

Cate Kneale

I like Jamie Wheal and so based on this alone, I have a totally unfounded view that he could probably climb trees and drop coconuts on all the gurus. Less of a team victory than a moral one.

Paul Bowman

I think from the pure violence angle, the pumping iron bros Huberman and Taleb would probably have enough to bludgeon everyone else to death. But, if physical liquidation could be averted long enough, then Eric, Dr K and Yudkowsy's interminable blether could well force everyone else to commit suicide rather than listen to another never-ending stream of self-regarding gibberish. So I backed Dan's team for their ability to drive the others insane first

Molly Bretthauer

Oh dear, you’d be dead very fast

Adam Sher

Joe Rogan hunts elk with a bow. He might hunt you but until then, you'll definitely have that all meat diet covered. Plus you'll never forgot to get vitamin D.

JackG

Imagine being stuck with Taleb. He'd just be calling you a fucking idiot the whole time

teethgrinder

Jocko, Peter Attia and Jordan Peterson in the vain hope that Jocko would get so mad about Jordans ranting, that he would get rid of him somehow :)

Don Schaffner

The three decoders plot to kill the six gurus. Problem solved.

Charles Coatsworth

I'd have taken joe rogan and Andrew tate to kick the piss out of the other teams and Destiny as a third to morally justify it Out of this lot though I'd say team Lex!

Marfolini

Bill Maher, Dave Rubin and Douglas Murray. Zero survival skills, but Bill Maher would make the other two uncomfortable by constantly bringing up anal sex. It would be the only configuration that would allow for some peace and quiet.

Paul Hanrahan

I’m getting Triangle of Sadness vibes regarding Sabine

Jakub Tomaszewski

I think that Huberman would unironically be best at surviving in the wild + he would just charge the whole team with negative ions and make them immune to disease or sth. But Sabine Hossenfelder would probably just wander around the island talking about how the survival efforts are failing, because everyone is wasting their time trying to hunt when it's obvious that we should all just be planting potatoes.

April Fair

Given that Peterson views fire as a predator, it's probably best he wasn't picked for any of the teams

DemonicDreamer

Is jocko not considered a bad guru? because he is the clear pick

Robert O

I’d just ride solo on Goggins’ back like a parasite, eating whatever he leaves behind

aneladgam_varelse

My team: Peter Attia (a doctor), Jordan Peterson (a cook), Hasan Piker (a pirat whisperer)

aneladgam_varelse

I vote for Team Spiritual Evolution. Bret will have genius ideas informed by biology and survival of the species, Yudkowsky and his sense of doom will alert them to danger, dr K knows a lot about primitive (ancient) medicine and diet and is after all a doctor.

H H

Eric is waiting for the call you guys! Doesn’t matter what team, he has got his jacket on!

michael r

You’ve all missed a trick, should have picked Rogan, Huberman and jocko willink. The key point is to keep the gurus from the same guru orbit so they all get along and then pick the most survivalist ones.

Daniel

Bret probably has the most immunity to tropical illnesses from all his field work so in that way he's an asset. But before that would ever matter he'd come up with a stupid idea he thought was genius that gets him and his teammates killed. Lex would try to have conversations with the other teams and find a way they could all survive--then be murdered. So it has to be Matt's Team Science. Not because they're smarter but because the other teams have huge liabilities.

Max

Oh god this seemed like a no-brainer to me but after voting i'm in the minority. Lex and Chris would be carrying the team while unfortunately Andrew and Sabine would doom the other team with confusing strategies and drama. (Sorry Matt). And goes without saying that Bret would poison everyone on team 3. 🤣

Jay

I had never heard of Yudkowsky and then two consecutive podcasts were discussing him, this one and Hard Fork.

Jay

Scott Adams is the only guru so far where you felt like the Decoders really just (justifiably) hated the guy.

Z

Matt's team has superior social cohesion I feel, plus combined skillset. Matt how much thought have you put into this

Z

Glad to see Chris going for the underrated Jamie Wheal pick, but why, why Scott Adams 😭🤣

Jeremiah

Chris wtf is that team, got wounded bird, morale black hole, and sense making third wheel! Matt is biohacked and stacked, and got Nassim running on pure rage