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5. Hidan: Can You Believe This?!
🕑 Added 2025-04-27 16:47:37 +0000 UTC
When Shiki woke up the next morning, a cultist came to report that the leader had summoned him to the laboratory.
Shiki raised an eyebrow but didn’t head straight there—instead, he made his way to the cafeteria.
The moment he stepped outside, a sharp, needle-like killing intent prickled against his skin.
Without hesitation, a thick, violet centipede-like appendage burst from his back, shielding his head just as a black spear came hurtling down from above.
The spear, propelled by gravity, pierced through Shiki’s Kakuja tail but got stuck in the coiled centipede body.
"Damn it! You actually noticed? You bastard, Shiki!"
Hidan’s furious voice came from above.
Shiki didn’t even need to look up to know it was that idiot again.
After all, since last night, Hidan had already attempted to assassinate him three times.
The only reason it stopped at three was because, after the third try, Shiki had beheaded him again and left his head soaking in the blood pool for gene analysis.
Someone must have fished him out again.
But this time, the outcome was no different.
Hidan’s reflexes were no match for the speed of Shiki’s [Scale Kakuja: Mantis].
A dark red flash streaked through the air, and Hidan’s head once again dropped helplessly to the ground.
Shiki coiled his centipede tail around Hidan’s head and deadpanned, "Next time you try to assassinate me, maybe practice on a rabbit or two first."
Meaning: You’re so weak, you’d probably lose to a rabbit.
Hidan exploded. "Kamizuki Shiki! Listen here—if you ever get hurt, just wait till I get my hands on your blood! You’re dead!"
Shiki stared at him blankly.
So this idiot just openly revealed his ability? Did he have a death wish?
Looking at Hidan’s brainless expression and recalling the equally moronic "Lord Jashin" who only knew how to cackle menacingly, Shiki suddenly understood something.
No wonder Jashin chose this guy.
Not that Shiki cared. Even if Hidan somehow got his blood, at worst, he’d just lose a clone. He could always make another.
In other words, Shiki’s abilities were practically the perfect counter to Hidan’s Dead Demon Consuming Seal.
And even if Hidan somehow discovered Shiki’s true body (the blood pool), both of them were immortal.
Hidan’s curse wouldn’t work anyway.
With that in mind, Shiki dragged Hidan’s head into the cafeteria.
It was peak mealtime, and the moment the dozens of cultists in line saw Shiki and Hidan, they immediately cleared a path.
"Are they the chosen ones?"
"Hidan’s so lucky… Even after getting decapitated, he’s still alive thanks to Lord Jashin's favor."
"Truly, fools have all the luck…"
These were veteran cultists who had known Hidan since he was a kid—a loudmouthed, brainless fanatic who worshipped Jashin with zero critical thinking.
Hearing their whispers, Hidan redirected his anger at them.
"What the hell are you staring at?! Never seen a severed head before?!"
"Keep looking and I’ll chop your heads off too! Send you straight to Lord Jashin!"
Faced with Hidan’s relentless verbal assault, everyone shut up immediately.
Not everyone had Shiki’s immunity.
As an immortal with curse techniques, Hidan had way too many methods to make their lives hell.
Shiki adjusted his glasses, a strange gentleness in his eyes as he patted Hidan’s head.
"There, there. No need to get so worked up."
Hidan’s face turned green with rage. "I SWEAR TO GOD, SHIKI—STOP TREATING ME LIKE A PET!"
Ignoring him, Shiki politely approached the cafeteria lady.
"One half roast suckling pig and a bowl of miso soup, please."
Even after thirty years of cooking in the cult—seeing hundreds of corpses and bragging about being able to cook in a pile of dead bodies—the cafeteria lady still froze at the sight of Shiki casually holding a talking head.
"What’re you gawking at?! Hurry up! I want fried pork cutlet!" Hidan barked.
The lady didn’t dare argue, forcing a nervous smile as she quickly prepared their food.
A moment later, Shiki accepted the overstuffed tray with a polite "Thank you."
The lady looked deeply uncomfortable.
Hidan, meanwhile, glared. "Listen here, hag—if this tastes bad, I’ll slaughter you!"
The lady finally relaxed. Ah, that’s more like it.
Shiki sighed.
Is everyone in this cult a masochist or something?
Combined with the system’s earlier "Become Jashin’s believer or his concubine" option, Shiki was now certain:
Jashin was NOT a respectable god.
And his followers?
Definitely not respectable either.
Shiki took his tray and sat at a random table. Everyone in the cafeteria kept their distance, terrified of catching Hidan’s attention.
At least Hidan’s reputation had one benefit—the cafeteria lady didn’t skimp on portions.
Shiki’s half roast pig even came with an extra trotter, which delighted him. He immediately dug in.
Honestly? The food here was way better than his college cafeteria in his past life.
As he ate, he suddenly felt a pathetic, resentful stare.
He glanced to the side.
Oh. Right.
Hidan’s head was propped on the chair, watching him eat.
Shiki smiled apologetically. "Ah, my bad. Forgot about you."
Then he grabbed Hidan, pinched his nose to force his mouth open, and poured the entire fried pork cutlet meal straight in.
"MMMPH! MMMF—!!"
"I’LL F*CKING KILL YOU—!!"
The fried pork must’ve been delicious—after all, Hidan was so moved he couldn’t even speak properly.
Satisfied, Shiki went back to eating.
Hidan finally managed to swallow the entire meal… only for it to spill right back out from his neck stump.
"I’LL MURDER YOU, KAMIZUKI SHIKI!!!"
Hidan’s roar echoed through the entire cult base.
Shiki, of course, was used to it.
After finishing his meal, he wiped his mouth with a napkin… then used the same napkin to wipe Hidan’s face.
Then he cheerfully carried Hidan out.
Hidan: CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS SH*T?!
