StarWaves
patreon
The Fox Hole 37
🕑 Added 2024-12-28 19:55:59 +0000 UTCChapter 37: Recruitment
– Haru –
I stood on the surface of the moon, staring back at the Earth. My tails swayed lazily behind me as I took in the breathtaking view. It was surreal, this quiet, desolate place with the blue and green orb hanging in the void above. For a moment, I just let myself take it all in.
"Space. The final frontier. These are the voyages of the restaurant The Fox Hole. Its mission: to spread delicious food all over the multiverse, to explore strange new dimensions, to seek out unique flavors and diverse palates, to boldly serve where no chef has cooked before!" I recited to myself with a grin.
"Oh my god, please stop," Shepard whined next to me. She was standing in a slim, high-tech space suit with her visor up to reveal her exasperated expression. "That show came out over 100 years ago and is so dated now!"
I chuckled. "Not to me, it’s not!"
Shepard sighed but there was a playful edge to it. "Whatever. Hey, thanks for rescuing me and my crew. I know Wrex and that weird guy with the halberd helped, but you pretty much steamrolled over all the killer drones that AI sent after us," she said, stepping closer and giving me a hug.
My tails wagged instinctively as I hugged her back. "No problem, Jane."
She leaned back, giving me a curious look. "Okay, so how are you even standing on the moon without a space suit? Don’t you need to breathe?"
I tilted my head. "I am breathing," I pointed out.
She leaned in slightly, her brow furrowed as she observed my chest rising and falling. "Huh... so you are. What exactly are you breathing, then? Because there’s no air here."
I shrugged. "I’m breathing... pure magic? Or something? I don’t know." It was the truth, and honestly, it didn’t bother me. I’d grown to trust that strange goddess, even though I had no idea who she was and had never met her…
Shepard shook her head, clearly bemused. "That’s very weird. Then again, as an N7, I was trained to be a spy and a soldier. Trust doesn’t exactly come easy for me. Either way, I suppose we should head back now. Everyone’s waiting for us."
I turned around and spotted Wrex smirking at me, his hulking frame impossible to miss, and Armsmaster, who had finally chilled out a bit after fighting through an army of killer robots and drones, and then rescue Shepard’s crew—a mix of humans and aliens from an alternate reality that Armsmaster clearly hadn’t been prepared to process. Yeah... it was a lot. And I had no doubt Armsmaster was going to have many, many questions.
Questions that someone else could answer!
I wrapped my arm around Shepard as she leaned her head on my shoulder. Together, we walked back to the shuttle.
Our group made it back to the Normandy.
It was a happy ending... except for the fact that Tevos was standing in the middle of the ship making Shepard’s whole crew very nervous.
"Oh... welcome back, Commander," Joker said awkwardly from his station. "Yeah... there’s a council member here..."
"Ah, shit," Shepard muttered with a wistful sigh. She quickly slapped on a fake smile and stepped forward. "Hey there... boss. What are you doing here? And how are you even here? Don’t you, like... never leave the Citadel?"
Tevos smirked, there was a playful glint in her eye. "I thought it would be prudent to check in on the latest Specter’s status, especially since doing so is incredibly easy. All I have to do is walk through a couple of doors in The Fox Hole to arrive on the Normandy."
"That sounds like a massive security issue in hindsight," Joker pointed out.
Shepard tried to play it cool, ignoring Joker’s comment. "So, uh, would you like a tour of the ship?" she asked Tevos with a forced cheerfulness.
Tevos shook her head, her polite smile not quite reaching her eyes. "No, thank you. I’d much rather hear about your latest unsanctioned mission to Earth’s only moon. I believe I heard something about humanity secretly creating an AI, despite it being forbidden by Council law, and then—to no one’s surprise—the AI turned hostile and killed everyone on the entire lunar surface."
"Yeah... that about sums it up," Shepard admitted, her fake smile faltering.
"I thought so," Tevos said simply as she placed a hand on Shepard’s shoulder and began leading her toward a private room. It was clear Shepard was about to be thoroughly grilled for all the details.
I watched them go, shrugging to myself. The Systems Alliance was probably in deep shit for this one, but honestly? Not my problem. Turning to Wrex, I smirked. "You want to get another drink?"
"Damn right I do!" he said with a toothy grin. “Come on, new guy! You fought well with that weird weapon! Now let's get shitfaced!” Wrex said to Armsmaster.
“Alright, screw it…” Armsmaster was just going with the flow at this point.
…
A very drunk Armsmaster and Wrex stumbled out of the restaurant about an hour later. Not before Armsmaster managed to get me to promise—with his slurred insistence—to actually meet up with Director Emily Piggot.
And not blow her off...
"I'll do my best," I said, waving them out with one of my tails. Watching them disappear was equal parts amusing and a relief. Wrex’s drinking habits could put a brewery out of business, and Armsmaster wasn’t exactly a lightweight either, apparently. Or maybe the guy just decided to really let go today...?
As I turned back to the bar, Enri walked over, clutching her nose and wrinkling it in clear discomfort. "The stench of alcohol can be too much sometimes," she complained, her voice muffled by her hand. "Especially with what Wrex drank."
I winced slightly and nodded. "Yeah, sorry about that. I’ll look into commissioning some yokai to set up wards around the bar to block the heavier smells. I’m used to it, but you’re right—some customers probably aren’t."
Glancing over at Alice, who was sitting quietly at one of the tables, I called out, "What about you? Does the smell bother you?"
She shrugged, looking up lazily. "Not really. I’ve been pretty much nose blind my whole life... which, granted, hasn’t been very long. You know, clone and all. But considering I came from a world filled with rotten zombies walking around, this is nothing."
I chuckled softly. "Fair enough."
Before the conversation could go any further, the door to the restaurant swung open, and in walked Rias and Akeno. They were dressed in their signature Kuoh Academy uniforms, the ones with the ridiculously short skirts that somehow never seemed to bother either of them.
– Rias –
Rias felt a wave of happiness wash over her as she stepped into the restaurant and saw her handsome fiancé. The sight of Haru leaning casually against the bar with a smile directed at her made the stress of her day melt away—at least a little.
“Ugh,” she muttered under her breath. Why had she thought attending a human school in Japan was a good idea? Japanese people went to school six days a week. Six!
That was way too much.
It had looked so much more fun in the anime. Back then, she’d imagined herself living out carefree school days filled with all kinds of tropes. In reality, all she got was exhaustion and relentless assignments.
And now that she no longer had the excuse of the stress of being forced to marry Riser, there was no way to avoid the expectations being piled on her.
She’d “gotten what she wanted” after all. Her parents and older brother now expected her to attend classes seriously, maintain decent grades, and ensure the rest of her peerage did the same. Some might think a human education was useless in the underworld, but that was becoming less true with every passing year. Human advancements in math and technology were outpacing anything most devils had ever anticipated. Outside of a few institutions run by Ajuka, the underworld’s education systems were falling behind, and more noble devil families were following the Gremory and Sitri leads by sending their children to the human world for schooling.
A few days ago, Rias had even received a letter asking if Ravel Phenex could attend Kuoh Academy. Personally, she didn’t mind the idea. Ravel seemed polite and intelligent enough, and she had no real problem with the girl. Of course, that was on the strict condition that her obnoxious brother didn’t dare to show up. If he did? Well, Rias figured she’d have to make sure he regretted it. After all, she wasn’t the same person she’d been during that ridiculous engagement. She’d been training after school with her brother every few days, and slowly but surely, she was getting stronger.
Rias noticed that Akeno was the first to reach the bar. Her queen and practically a sister to her wasted no time leaning forward, her eyes glinting mischievously as she fixed Haru with a sultry smile.
"Haru," Akeno purred, "Do you know what you and a cucumber have in common?"
"Um, no?" Haru replied.
"I would love to have both inside me!" Akeno grinned.
Haru’s face immediately turned a deep shade of red, his composure shattered as he sputtered incoherently. "W-What?! Akeno!"
Nearby, Enri-chan gasped, clutching her cheeks. "Wawawawahhh!"
Meanwhile, Alice, sitting in a booth, glared daggers at Akeno. "This audacious little slut..." she muttered.
Akeno, of course, just grinned at everyone’s reactions.
Rias sighed, crossing her arms. "Akeno, dial down your thirst, please. Need I remind you that Haru is my fiancé!?"
"And my boyfriend too," Alice spoke up, her tone sharper as she looked directly at Akeno.
Rias’s expression softened into a warm smile as she turned to Alice. "Oh? So it finally happened. Congratulations, Alice. I told you those meetings were a good thing."
Alice rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide the slight smile tugging at her lips. "Thanks," she muttered playfully.
Akeno pouted dramatically, throwing her arms up. "How am I supposed to be Haru’s slutty mistress if I don’t ever get any opportunities to flirt with him?"
Rias deadpanned, her voice flat. "Considering we’re going to be together for tens of thousands of years, you’ll have plenty of time."
Akeno giggled but stepped back, satisfied for now. Meanwhile, Rias turned her attention to Haru. She took a deep breath before throwing her arms up in the air dramatically. "I need your help, Haru! I’m failing as an otaku and need to correct the situation immediately!"
Haru seemed amused by her theatrics, a small smile playing at the corner of his lips. "What’s wrong?"
Rias leaned on the counter, glancing at Haru with a dramatic sigh. "The Fox Hole gives me access to all these awesome isekai worlds, and yet I’ve failed to recruit a single otherworlder into my peerage! Isn’t that a travesty!?" she exclaimed, throwing her hands up in frustration.
Haru chuckled at her antics, his tails swaying lazily behind him. He turned his attention to Enri, who was busy tidying up nearby. "Maybe you can recruit Enri over here?" Haru suggested with a playful grin.
Rias paused, tapping her chin as she considered the idea. Enri was a sweet girl, no doubt about it. She had a good sense of when to stand up for herself and was steadily becoming a skilled cook under Haru’s guidance. There was potential there. She could go far as one of Rias’s servants.
Before Rias could voice her thoughts, Enri’s reaction was immediate and vehement. "No way! I only want to serve under Lord Haru!"
Ara…" Akeno giggled, her voice dripping with amusement. "I’m sure she would love to serve 'under' you, Haru," she teased, emphasizing the word "under" in a way that made Enri’s face turn a deep shade of red.
Rias sighed and glanced at Haru, who looked mildly exasperated by Akeno’s comment. "Are you going to use the ‘rite’ on her?" Rias asked. "I figured you’d be doing it with your human lovers eventually too."
"The rite?" Enri tilted her head in confusion. Alice, seated nearby, also looked curious.
Haru scratched his cheek awkwardly. "Er… I hadn’t really thought about it, but I figure I’ll have to at some point. We’ve got years, though, if nothing else comes up, so I’m not worried."
Rias shrugged, her curiosity sated for now, as Akeno took it upon herself to explain the rite to the two curious girls.
"Basically," Akeno began, "the rite is a ritual that yokai with incredibly long lives, or immortal ones like Haru’s kind, use when they have mortal partners. It ties the person’s lifespan to the yokai’s. The human becomes ageless but not unkillable. They’re still completely normal, just someone who doesn’t grow old or get sick anymore."
Haru nodded in agreement. "My stepfather underwent the rite," he said, his voice quieter now. "After that, he and my mother had Kunou." He paused, his expression darkening slightly. "Unfortunately, my stepfather…" Haru trailed off, unable to finish the thought.
Rias reached across the counter and grabbed his hand, squeezing it gently to console him. She didn’t know much about Haru’s stepfather—almost no one did outside the yokai community—but from the few things Haru had mentioned, it was clear the man had been a good person. A silence settled over the group for a moment, before Rias got them back on topic!
Rias told Haru that she wanted to recruit a genuine ninja into her peerage! Even if Naruko and Naruto said no… Rias wasn’t going to give up so easily. Her inner otaku would not allow it.
– Haru –
And that’s how Rias and I ended up walking around the Leaf Village on what could only be described as a recruitment trip/date. Judging by the way she was tightly hanging off my arm, pressing her impressive assets against my side, it definitely looked more like the latter to the villagers we passed.
Some muttered under their breath as we walked by.
“Disgusting monster…” one villager whispered. “How can that girl be so shameless snuggling up against such a creature!?”
“Why does the freak get such a hot girl?” another grumbled in jealousy.
Others didn’t bother muttering. Their looks of disgust at my fox-like features said enough. I ignored them. It wasn’t the first time I’d been stared at like that, and it sure as hell wouldn’t be the last.
I glanced down at Rias as we strolled through the village. "So, do you have any idea who you’re looking to recruit?"
She turned her head to look up at me, her cheeks tinged with a faint blush. "I didn’t think that far ahead," she admitted cutely.
I shrugged, smirking a little. "That’s fine. While you’re thinking about it, I’ve got a personal errand to take care of. I need to visit the dog clan."
“The Inuzuka?” Rias tilted her head curiously. “How come?”
“Kunou has a new puppy now. It’s a golden retriever. He's an energetic and friendly little guy. Training him isn’t too hard since we can literally talk to him, but he sheds everywhere. That’s just his biology,” I explained. “I was wondering if the Inuzuka might have a remedy for that. Their dogs can’t exactly shed during missions, right? That would leave a trail behind.”
“Smart thinking,” Rias said with a nod. “I’m not really interested in recruiting an Inuzuka, though. I’d have to use a peerage piece on their dogs too, but I’d still love to see their compound.”
As we wandered further into the village, I stopped a random chunin who was eyeing us both suspiciously, but eventually gave us the directions. I thanked him, and Rias and I continued on our way, ignoring the chunin’s lingering stare as we left. Something about it didn’t sit right with my instincts but the guy didn’t try anything so I figured it was fine for the time being.
– Yon –
Yon had no name. He was just a number. A tool crafted to serve his master. After the target, the owner of the strange, impenetrable restaurant, began heading towards his destination, Yon moved quickly. He darted towards the nearest manhole, opened it, and dove inside. Beneath the bustling streets of the Leaf Village lay the true power of the village—the heart of the organization known as Root.
Reaching into his pack, Yon slipped on a blank white mask. He had shown his real face to the target because the reports indicated that the fox-man known as Haru was highly skilled with illusions, and a basic transformation jutsu wouldn’t fool him. It was of no concern, no one in the village knew Yon’s face anyway. He had been a member of Root ever since he was a baby.
Serving the village and Lord Danzo was his only purpose.
Yon moved swiftly through the underground tunnels, his steps silent and precise. He arrived at a wall adorned with hidden seals. Placing his hand on the wall, he pulsed his chakra in a specific pattern—a password known only to members of Root. The wall slid open, and Yon slipped inside before it sealed shut again with a soft thud.
Inside, Root agents stood or sat in silence, waiting. Their blank masks and stiff postures were a reflection of the unyielding discipline of their organization. No one in Root had free time or leisure. They were either on an assignment or waiting for one to be assigned. Yon nodded at his fellow operatives as he passed, his expression hidden beneath his mask.
Reaching the most secure part of the hidden base, Yon stopped in front of a heavy door and knocked firmly.
"Lord Danzo," he called out, his voice steady and devoid of emotion. "The target is on the move through the village, heading towards the Inuzuka compound. He is not accompanied by the jinchuriki at this time, and the Hokage does not yet know he is wandering the village."
The door creaked open, and Yon stepped inside. Lord Danzo stood at the center of the room, his one visible eye sharp and calculating. For a moment, a rare grin appeared on Danzo’s face, a sight so unusual it made Yon pause internally.
"Excellent work, Yon," Danzo said, his tone betraying a hint of satisfaction. "Go and mobilize all available forces. We will make a move on the target and subdue him. All of his secrets will finally belong to us."
Yon bowed deeply. "As you command, Lord Danzo."
XXX
Comments
james murphy
dumb ass he is so screwed
Lupus Umbras
That's hilarious. Already have him on patreon. Not a huge fan of GI but Souls in Teyvet is incredible
Ototsu_Yume
Martial Teyvat is a fun fic too, since you like GI stuff you'd probably enjoy that one as well; that one's by Azazyel.
Lupus Umbras
Souls in teyvet is by ARandomMob
j0ntsa
Could you pm link?
Lupus Umbras
This and souls in teyvet are my top 2 favorite fan fics I have ever read. An oh god have I read a lot.
Chase Garcia
Well Danzo has always been an envious idiot
Aeden Emrys
And this is how Danzo die! Foolish power hungry psycho! ... Thanks for the chapter! Looking forward to Danzo and Root getting destroyed!
Wilfrid Calixte killian
Next chapterCiao danzo 🤣
WhatAFungi
Danzo is a ittle bit of a Bozo
