methorne
patreon
[RAW]Apocalypse Innkeeper -- Chapter 1
🕑 Added 2023-05-14 15:09:47 +0000 UTCHere's part 2 of my story stubs! I've been reading Defiance of the Fall; it's a great series, but the grimness and the unrelenting shittiness the MC has to go through kind of got me wondering -- what if he just quit? What if he threw up his hands, said 'Fuck This' and got a chance to do something else?
Plus -- you know, fucking some hot monster girls.
Anyway, let me know what you think!
======================================
Chapter 1
“That’s it, I’m done!” I shouted, my face and chest covered in the still warm offal and blood of the man I had just killed. “I quit, fuck this end-of-the-world RPG system bullshit!”
I threw down my sword for effect. Of course, since it was little more than a rusty slab of metal, it broke immediately.
“Fuck.” I wiped some of the blood out of my face and looked at the dead guy.
He didn’t look much different than me, outside the fact that his guts were on his outsides rather than his insides. Wild, uncombed hair and beard, wearing little more than gore-splattered rags and the shredded remains of a pair of sneakers.
“Bastard didn’t even have decent shoes,” I grumbled, taking a moment to loot the guy.
He had burst out of the bushes to my right, screaming bloody murder, hoping to shock me and get me to drop my guard. That might have worked on the first murder hobo to try the same trick. But by the sixth time? Never going to happen.
I had gutted the guy with Fatal Flourish, my sword art before he could even get a strike in.
Out of habit, I flashed the corpse with Inspect.
[Chet Hayes (Human) – Level 15]
“Idiot,” I grumbled.
I was over ten levels above him; he might as well have tried to pick a fight with a speeding train; it would have been a less painful way to die. My best guess was he hadn’t bothered leveling up a perception skill and had no idea how strong I was before he jumped me.
“At least looting is easy,” I said as I picked through the guy’s Inventory, looking at the screen that hovered above the corpse.
Not that the murder-hobo had a lot, just two Healing Potions (Inferior Grade 1) and three Tasteless Rations (inferior Grade 1). Basically, the same starting items we all got dumped on Joriel. He didn’t even have an actual weapon, just a chunk of Rusty Rebar (Inferior Grade 1).
It had been three months since Earth had been chosen by gods, or hyperdimensional beings, aliens, or whatever to join the wilder multiverse and reclaim the lost planet of Joriel. Humanity had been pulled from our world, dumped in the overgrown remains of a planet-spanning ruin, and told to get to the hard job of defeating the ten Infernal Judges – or whatever.
Our gracious sponsors had been kind enough to bestow upon us an RPG-like system, complete with stats, items, gear, skills, and spells.
Attain Heaven Through Violence was the prompt we’d all received as we’d been kicked out into the wilderness and told to kill to our heart’s content.
Joriel was overrun with monsters, dungeons, and deadly perils, all of which needed to be overcome, along with the aforementioned Infernal Judges, before humanity could claim the planet and join the wider multiverse as an enlightened species.
It was all horseshit.
People had quickly started killing everything and anything in their way, including other humans, in their bid to reap XP, level up, and get stronger. Power had become the sole measure of a man, those who were too kind or too weak were cut down, their lives little more than a running tally for their murders.
And I was fucking sick of it.
Pulling out my waterskin, I sat down on a nearby rock and pulled up my stats.
Name: Erin Fedofski
Level: 28
Class: [NONE]
Race: Human (Inferior 1)
Strength: 24
Agility: 21
Vigor: 29
Stamina: 28
Resolve: 15
Wit: 11
Points: 0
Realm Coins: 523
Skills:
Inspect (Inferior 1)
Fatal Flourish (Sword Inferior 1)
Titles: Novice Adventurer, Mankiller, Novice Ruin Scavenger, Novice Monster Hunter
Main Quests:
The Never Ending Climb (ONGOING): Reach Level 30
Redeem the World (GLOBAL): 0/10 Infernal Judges Slain
Side Quests:
Monster Slayer (ONGOING): Kill 521/1,000 Monsters
Ruin Delver (ONGOING): Clear 7/10 Ruins
I would have been superhuman back home on Earth, with strength, speed, and stamina far beyond any mere mortal. On Joriel though, I was just one of a billion, all busy stabbing, hacking, and chopping their way to the top of the murder mountain.
But nope, I was done. I knew from experience that the ONGOING quests would just keep going, probably forever, all of them rewarding a few XP, maybe some potions, maybe some food, and that was it. Even the GLOBAL quest all of humanity was on to Redeem the World would probably just open some other questline where we had to kill a god or some garbage.
But I was done. I didn’t want power, I didn’t want epic weapons and loot, I just wanted a hot shower, a cold beer, and somewhere comfortable to sleep for the night.
The water in my waterskin was piss warm and tasted foul. I hadn’t been able to buy supplies in a while, so I had been foraging off the land. At that point, I really needed to go shopping.
“Maybe I can get a new shirt,” I said, poking my fingers through the gaping holes in the rags I was wearing.
At least I had enough money to hit the Realm Shop and buy some new gear. Maybe I could finally afford a decent piece of armor or something. I was still wearing the jeans and T-shirt I had been wearing on my last day on Earth.
Shoes too, I saw, looking at my filthy bare feet.
Then I remembered my cheap ass sword had broken. I’d have to replace that before anything else.
“Fuck this,” I grumbled, my head sinking into my hands.
*****
The Realm Shops weren’t much to look at, they were little more than pylons set in the middle of the more intact ruins. The system granted us maps, dropping a pin for each shop discovered, making it easy to trek back and forth to resupply.
Unfortunately, the prices for items in the shop were insane. Even just enough food and water to live on for a day, if you could call Tasteless Rations food, cost one hundred Realm Coins.
To put that in perspective, clearing a ruin usually netted you fifty coins. Killing a typical monster gave you one or two.
That wasn’t even getting into how much potions or gear cost. Of my five hundred-plus coins, I’d have enough to be a Cheap Sword (Inferior 1) and that was about it.
It was all part of the scam. The system constantly pushed you to push yourself more and more, to take more ridiculous risks and break past your limits. Every day was a monumental struggle to survive.
“And I am so fucking done,” I said as I looked at the shop menu.
It was pretty basic, like out of one of the old-school games I had played as a kid. The Realm Shops listed out their inventory, you’d pick the quantity you wanted, and the amount was instantly deducted from your stats.
For a while, I just hovered over the dumbass sword. I knew it was the smart move to pick up a new weapon and clear some ruins and hope to earn enough to buy me a replacement when the piece of shit inevitably broke.
If I was really, really lucky I’d barely escape the ruin’s boss fight with my life and loot their chest to find a Cheap Sword (Inferior 2), maybe even some Tasteless Rations.
It was little wonder that people murdered each other without a second thought. Joriel was a meat grinder, meant to winnow down humanity till just the strongest, toughest, and most unscrupulous survived.
“Fuck that,” I said, my finger moving to the clothing section.
I bought a shirt, pants, and a pair of sandals. None of them had stats, they weren’t considered armor, but I was fucking sick of wearing bloodstained rags.
That ate up almost all the money I had. As a lark, I bought a bottle of Water (Inferior 1) too.
“Living high off the hog,” I said as the items materialized into my inventory.
There wasn’t anyone else around trying to murder me, so I decided to go wash up in a creek nearby.
Joriel wasn’t much to look at, but once I imagined it had been a beautiful majestic city, one that spanned the entire planet. Huge skyscrapers had risen thousands of stories in the air, from the bedrock to the stratosphere, with countless bridges and highways connecting them all. Billions must have lived there.
But then shit hit the fan, everyone died, monsters moved in, and nobody lived happily ever after.
I don’t know how long ago Joriel’s civilization died, but I was guessing decades if not centuries. Nature had slowly been claiming back the planet. Huge trees smashed up through the cityscape, and most of the derelict buildings were covered in vines, moss, and plant life.
It would be kind of melancholy but pretty if everything there weren’t trying to kill you.
The creek in question came out of some kind of old storm drain or sewer outlet. The water was clean enough, so once I was sure the coast was clear I stripped off my rags and hopped in.
“Fuck it’s cold,” I said, shivering as I scrubbed off as much of the mud, guts, and grime as I could.
I had grabbed the sharpest bit off my broken sword. Using it as a razor, I scraped off my beard and most of the knotted, untamed mess growing on top of my head. My Vigor was high enough that the stupid thing wasn’t even sharp enough to cut me.
Feeling more human than I had in months, I dried off and dressed in my new duds. They were made from dull, homespun fabric, but they felt like the finest garb in the world. Even the cheap, straw sandals felt fantastic after weeks spent running around barefoot.
With relish, I took a seat by the creek bed and cracked open my Water (Inferior 1).
It tasted like dirt and piss, but at least it was cold. I chugged it in one go.
The suns were shining, the day was warm, and I was flat broke.
Shading my eyes, I stared up at the sky. “Shit, what do I do now?”
