Flossindune
patreon
Chapter 84
🕑 Added 2023-07-27 13:15:57 +0000 UTCCrisp County-Cordele Regional Airport, Cordele - 6:52 PM
Kayla and Jeff looked at me expectantly. I had no doubt that I had a silly grin on my face, but I couldn’t help it. Even though it had just happened this morning, I still almost couldn’t believe that Sara was my Patron. That she was able to go on this journey with me for the first time. This was the stuff of dreams. Even as I opened my mouth to tell them, a message screen popped up in front of me.
[[Patron Message]]
Are you sure about this?
Sincerely,
Sara, Girlfri-End
Smiling, I swiped away the message and looked up to the sky. “Yeah, I’m sure. It’s not much of a leap from what they already know, so there’s little harm in spilling the beans,” I said. “There’s not much difference between ‘I can see the future’ and ‘I’ve actually lived through the future’ if they decided to tell an administrator directly, after all.”
“We’re not going to rat you out,” Jeff assured me, though not without groaning. “But I do owe Kayla fifty points now.”
Kayla wore a smug expression as she leaned up to kiss Jeff’s cheek. “You sure do, honey.”
“Oh, y’all bet on it, that’s cute,” I said, though I couldn’t be mad at them.
“She bet that you were some kind of time traveler, I bet that you were an angel all along,” Jeff explained.
I cocked an eyebrow at Kayla, and her smugness ascended another level. “The world’s first notice said she was ‘Esaraphelscion, Angel of the End,’ right? Jeff already took the angel bet, so I came up with her being at the literal end of everything. She’s a Hidden World Boss, after all. It made sense at the time.” She shrugged. “I called the long shot and made myself fifty points.”
“Well, that is a stretch but damn if you didn’t get it right,” I chuckled. “Good work, though obviously this doesn’t get discussed at all outside of certain scenarios. Especially once we reach Atlanta, because while I’m glitched out for the administrators, y’all are not. It’ll be a fair while, but I do want you guys to know what I’m about.”
“Saving lives and kicking ass, right?” Jeff asked.
“Pretty close,” I said before becoming more serious. “I am, as Kayla surmised, a regressor. I won’t tell you what happens at the end, because we’re so far from it that it doesn’t matter, but that is where I met Esaraphelscion. If you start asking me about alternate timelines then we’ll be here all day, too, so none of that, please.”
“That’s just fucking crazy, boss,” Jeff said, shaking his head. “Like, are we even qualified to be hanging out with you?”
“I’d really like it if you stuck around.”
“This explains so much,” Kayla stated. “Your attitude, knowledge, skills. Me being worried about not being a knife master right away seems trivial compared to what you had to have gone through.”
“Going through this before a few times, yeah,” I said. “Seraphim knows it’s at least twice. The Dealer was content to hear I had done it seven times, though I’m not sure if he believed me or not.”
Kayla’s smug look started to disappear as realization came over her. “Wait, back when we were talking to Thomas, you mentioned having the memories of 99 iterations in your head,” she said slowly. “Did you really do this that many times?”
“Give or take.”
“Give or take what? That’s an absurdly large number.”
“Give or take an amount,” I said, shrugging. Honestly, this was a reaction I was anticipating. “Well, you already know I’m not really fine in the same way everyone else is, but I’ve been doing this for so long that it’s just kinda who I am now. I guess. The longer you do something, the less you’re stressed about it.”
Kayla continued to stare at me, and Jeff looked between us. He was processing this much faster than his wife, though it was that kind of attitude I liked about him. “Why so many? You’re not, like, addicted to the rush or something, are you?” he asked.
I shook my head. “No, nothing of the sort. I’m trying to save as many people as I can. That’s what the letters were for, to help all the people I can’t. I spend a run trying new things, I talk to Esaraphelscion, and then I refine. The plan’s a little off its rails, but it’s nothing that can’t probably be salvaged. Not that it would matter.”
“This is your last try,” Kayla whispered. “That’s why you broke down in the hotel room. It’s the only one I can think of, at least. Why would you do that if it weren’t permanent? You said it was real, this time. I thought you just had dreams of the future or something but this is it, isn’t it?”
“And that’s the kind of critical thinking that I need,” I said with a soft smile.
“You realize how absurd this sounds, right?” she asked.
“Yet that’s the scenario you bet on.”
“Yeah, like once or twice. 99 damn times is pushing it a bit much on what I could reasonably expect.” She squinted at me. "How old are you? What's the difference between you and some eldritch, unknowable being aside from the shell?"
“Kinda rude, but also fair. I’m still a human; I made damn sure that I never threw away my humanity. Wasn’t sure if I’d ever come back if I did. And I'm not sure how old I am, honestly. It's been long enough to convince Esaraphelscion, my Sara, to become my girlfriend, though,” I said with a shrug. Then I looked back up. “Right? Can I call you that now? Or would you prefer-“
[[Patron Message]]
Yes, I am your girlfriend. I’m surprised that you didn’t think we were since you went through all the trouble of preparing a date for us.
Sincerely,
Sara, Girlfri-End
“Well, we didn’t actually say it and just going on a date doesn’t make it official. I didn’t want to assume,” I said. Looking back down at Kayla and Jeff, I was no longer able to control my smile. I gave them two thumbs up. “She’s not my long distance kinda relationship anymore. It’s still complicated, but there’s a label now.”
“She’s too good for you,” Jeff immediately said, though I could tell he was joking.
“Oh, have we gotten to the point in our friendship where we can just rib on each other without worry?” I shot back. “Though I can’t say you’re wrong.”
“I didn’t really get a good look at her due to the fire and the really bright halo, but she seemed really pretty,” Kayla said. “Good on you, psychic boy.”
“Yeah, good on you,” Jeff repeated.
[[Patron Message]]
Tell her thank you for me! And that I like her glasses!
Sincerely,
Sara, Girlfri-End
“She says thank you and that she likes your glasses, Kayla,” I said.
The librarian reached up and adjusted her glasses as if just remembering they were there, and she smiled awkwardly. “Thank you, Sara.”
“So she’s your girlfriend and your Patron, right?” Jeff asked. “How does that work?”
“By all rights it shouldn’t,” I admitted. “She remembers through a memory orb, which was that green stone I gave her, and at the end of my last run I received a boon that not only let me start this one early, but allowed me to summon her exactly once. It took a System Contract that I got from the Dealer to cement her as my Patron.”
“Huh, neat.”
“Alright, while I'm still wrapping my mind around… you and your incredibly long life, let's switch gears. What are Patrons supposed to do again?” Kayla asked. “Al Showman was kind of vague. They choose people to be their avatars, right?”
I nodded. “Yes. Patrons can only have one avatar, though if that person dies or even if they don't like their choice anymore they can choose another,” I explained. “They accumulate points, prestige, accolades, power, and so forth by your actions. You can offer them items, which is where the demonic items went because Sara can purify them, so that they can change them to points or trade with other Patrons. They often give gifts, and the Patron’s Pact is sealed with the giving of a gift. Mine is this ring, given to me by Sara.”
Raising my finger, I sent them the item description for Esaraphelscion’s Love.
[[Equipped]]
Esaraphelscion’s Love
(Break Free)
“That’s not much of a description at all,” Kayla muttered. “But didn’t you say something about breaking free before you turned into an Angel?”
“Yes, that’s what allows me to turn into my Angelic form, although it is a very costly process,” I admitted. “It also turned me into a Half-Angel, though that’s mostly dormant until I have more power, apparently.”
“Isn’t a half-angel called a Nephilim?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. “Is that what you’re going to turn into when it stops being dormant?”
I shrugged. “Dunno, never been a Half-Angel before. It’s unfortunate but I gotta admit I’m not sure what the difference is. I’ve heard of Nephilims before, but I’ve never actually encountered any. Sara?” I looked up to the sky, but received no answer. After giving her enough time to answer, I shook my head. “No answer.”
“I always found it weird that it showed our race like that,” Jeff stated, opening his own menu to look at what I assumed was his status screen. “Like, of course we’re humans. Did they expect us to be a cat or, I don’t know, a goat or something? But if we can change races, that makes a lot more sense.”
“They’re fairly rare and generally irreversible, though there are some items that let you return to being a human or choose a race to change into,” I explained. “Atlanta will have two that haven’t been claimed yet by the time we get there, one that turns someone into an Orc and one that turns someone into a Half-Ignan. Tried both, personally, but neither really felt right, you know?”
“I can’t say I know what you mean there, boss,” Jeff said.
“Ignan, didn’t you mention those when we were in Etson City Hall?” Kayla asked. “Seven foot tall fire people with tails.”
“That’s right, almost dragonish in appearance,” I shook my head. “Dragonish? What I meant is Draconic in appearance, but yes. A Half-Ignan is still a fleshy human instead of being made of fire. They have red skin, radiate heat, and have a thick tail like a lizard. They’re well suited for fire based classes, as you can imagine.”
“So there’s items out there that give out classes, like that book, and items that will turn you into other races,” Kayla mumbled, as if trying to commit it to memory.
“I think I’ll stick to being a boring, regular human, thank you very much,” Jeff said, and I nodded.
“It’s what I chose most of the time. I can’t fault you for wanting to stay the same, especially when it’s permanent and you have a wife who is already content with the way you look,” I said. “I can’t tell you how many relationships I’ve seen fall apart because someone changed their race without consulting their significant other. It’s not pretty.”
“I thought you said race changes were rare. You make it sound like that’s a common occurrence,” Kayla noted.
“They are rare, and when you take into account how many people I’ve seen change their race, it is a common occurrence,” I replied. “I imagine Jeff wouldn’t be too disappointed if he came home and you had changed into a Dryad, but imagine coming home to a Yeti, or a Gremlin, or even a Demon with no discernible shape. Trust me, it’s a real mood killer.”
“Boring, regular ass human,” Jeff reiterated. Then he wrapped his arm around Kayla. “Though, you can be whatever you want and I’ll still love you, Kay.”
Kayla snorted. “I guess you’re just happy that I can shape shift on command later on, huh?” she asked with no small amount of snark in her voice.
Jeff looked away, but not fast enough to hide his grin. “No comment.”
I failed to hold back a chuckle. “Shall I get back to Patrons?”
Kayla stopped looking up at her husband to glance at me, and nodded as she wrapped her arms around him. “I suppose so.”
“Thank you, his queen,” I said sarcastically, giving a small bow. She rolled her eyes. “So while avatars help prop up Patrons with offerings, Patrons prop up their avatars in return. Mostly due to quests where they can hand out both points and items. For instance, defeating Amlex for Sara netted me an additional 1,000 points and this Circlet of Wasps on my head.”
“She had a Circlet of Wasps laying around?” Jeff asked.
“Sometimes they’re items that the Patron has laying around, like those purified demonic items that I’ll be collecting via a quest later, and sometimes they’re given by the system,” I explained. “The more quests an avatar completes, the bigger the points pool the Patron can achieve. Failing a quest means a decline in points, however. Some Patrons are assholes and ditch avatars the moment they fail, while others are more understanding.”
“Certainly sounds like something an asshole would do.”
“Yup. They take on prominent names from our legends, myths, and folklore. From what I understand, they bid on those. So there’s only one Odin, Zeus, Quetzalcoatl, or other names at any given time.”
“Who did you usually end up picking?” Kayla asked.
“Kronos, God of Time and King of the Titans,” I remarked. “Mostly because it’s convenient to me.”
“Because you’ve been alive for so long?” Jeff guessed.
I tilted my head, thinking about it for a moment. “Huh, maybe, but that’s not why it’s good for me,” I said. “The way the system is set up, the more a Patron leans into what their namesake would do, the more it would reward them. Kronos only gives one type of quest, and that’s to survive for a certain amount of time. Starts off slow, survive for an hour, ten points. Then another hour, fifty points. Survive for a month, thousands of points, and so on.”
“So by that logic, as an angel Sara will be giving you quests that deal with helping people and destroying demons,” Kayla stated.
I pointed at her. “Yes ma’am, got it. There’s going to be more leeway because Sara is actively invested in me as her avatar and devilishly handsome boyfriend, but those are going to be big ticket items on the quest card.”
“Is there a quest card now?” Jeff asked.
“No, that was just… something I said in the moment.”
Kayla patted her husband on the arm. “So there’s players, which is us. Then there’s administrators, who run the scenarios. Treasure Hunters are kind of like alternate players where they get to run around and collect items for Patrons, who are observers and quest givers.”
“Yeah, alternate players is a good way to describe a Treasure Hunter,” I replied, nodding.
“I get where the players come from, but what about everyone else?” she asked. “They have to come from somewhere. Did the system make them or did they bring the system here?”
“That is a question I’ve never been able to get answered,” I admitted with a grimace. “No matter how much I’ve pushed Sara, she’s never been able to tell me. Says it’s off limits knowledge and she literally can’t talk about it. Patrons aren’t sharing, either, and Treasure Hunters get cagey the moment you ask. Unless, Sara, can you tell me now that you are my Patron?”
This time, the message took a few seconds to appear.
[[Patron Message]]
Sorry, Ant, but as a Patron I’m bound to even stricter rules. I still can’t tell you anything about that at all.
Sincerely,
Sara, Girlfri-End
I shook my head. “Nothing to be sorry about, Sara.”
“Well, guess we won’t be figuring out the answer to that question any time soon, huh?” Jeff asked with a sigh.
“No, but you get used to the disappointment,” I stated. “And we’ll work on getting you a Patron all about protecting your wife. There’s no shortage of them who are about that knight life.”
“Sounds good! Oh, that’s going to be pretty exciting.”
“Not if you’re going to keep going around saying things like ‘my queen,’ it isn’t,” Kayla said, exasperation clear in her voice. “I don’t need that twice.”
Jeff was about to retort before the sound of screams filled the air, causing us all to go on guard. “He’s here,” I said as I looked to the sky where a single light shone brightly over the airfield.
Comments
Bunny Waffles
No life quite like the knight life!
