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Board & Conquest 88: The Hood
🕑 Added 2025-07-31 07:29:01 +0000 UTC-------
Wepwawet returned to his friends as a conqueror.
“And Hel just gave up?!” Artemis’ laughter echoed across their shared realm of Influence. “Oh, I would have loved to see that!”
“You should have seen her face when I claimed Antimagic Lock for myself,” Wepwawet replied with a grin. He knew it was beneath a god’s wisdom and station to mock a defeated enemy, but Hel had more than earned such scorn. “She was stewing in her own hatred.”
“Serves her right!” Artemis hit her palm with her fist. “That stuck-up goth should just fold and leave my land the same way if she knows what’s good for her. I won’t stop at taking only one Miracle!”
Ganesha, ever the kind soul, simply rejoiced on his friend’s behalf. “I’m just glad you and your followers are safe, Wepy. A large-scale war won’t do anybody any favors, whether on Elphion or in the Heavens.”
“The blackmailer’s identity remains a mystery, but I’m sure we’ll catch them eventually,” Wepwawet replied with a nod. He still hadn’t forgotten about that problem.
“It could have been one of them,” Ganesha said. “Hel is an easy suspect.”
“Hel? Infiltrating a gym?” Artemis scoffed. “She wouldn’t touch a bench press with Charon’s ten-foot pole!”
“I don’t think Watatsumi would be cunning or underhanded enough for such a scheme either,” Wepwawet replied. “Have you found any leads?”
“I did!” Artemis crossed her arms. “My half-brother was pissed when he found out that someone infiltrated his gym to take embarrassing pictures, and he has agreed to share with me the list of gym-goers who attended on that day!”
“That’s perfect!” Wepwawet rejoiced. “We’ll just have to check if any of our classmates showed up there!”
Artemis nodded happily. “We can review the list at my place later.”
Ganesha gave his friends a strange look before agreeing. “Sounds good,” he said as he changed the subject. “So, Wepy, what’s the plan for now? Do you need anything from us?”
“Well, first we can trade,” Wepwawet said. “I’ve promised I would trade Skill: Treasure Hunter with you, and now is the time. I’m also looking towards hiring more giant mercenaries to protect my borders.”
“I would love to do that too, but my civilization doesn’t have the economy for it yet,” Artemis complained.
“True…” Ganesha stroked his trunk and quickly came up with an idea. “Unless… unless I present it as a holy mission, with those enlisting benefitting from the Treasure Hunter Revelation.”
Wepwawet thought it would work. Ganesha’s greedy, self-centered followers would kill for the power to detect gold for miles around them. “We could also share a mercenary company’s contract,” he suggested to Artemis. “We don’t need hired retainers at all times inside a single country, so we can simply rent a company and deploy it either on Lavaland’s soil or the Wyld’s based on our needs.”
“We could improve cooperation between our conventional militaries, too,” Artemis replied. “Like standardizing our equipment to cheapen the production cost, building training facilities for all of us to use, or practicing group drills. We could even pull Ishtar in.”
“Are you sure?” Wepwawet asked. He would have expected his friends to be more wary of her.
“I mean, I don’t entirely trust her, but she had your back when it mattered and she’s in our corner for now,” Artemis said with a shrug. “We’re stronger together than when we are divided.”
“I think the idea of training camps and drills would appeal to Sun Wukong too, even if he won’t join our alliance,” Ganesha said. “We could have our troops practice warfare in different environments and learn from each other.”
The trio discussed the plan for a while, including the possibility of inviting other neutral parties like Axomamma to participate in military exercises. The danger of the Second Incursion and the Zoramesh-Valentine War had put everyone on edge and likely encouraged a military buildup in all nearby nations. Artemis also voiced interest in creating trade posts in the Wyld to improve commerce with Megaloria and other nations.
With that out of the way, Wepwawet then proceeded to trade Skill: Treasure Hunter to Ganesha in return for a copy of Sacred Food, one of the last few beginner deck cards left in his friend’s deck. He then overwrote it with the Pack Provides.
Now that he could cast the Pack Provides, Wepwawet first decided to run a test with his Elephant Wisdom Revelation. Its translation ability would help his ambassadors hammer out trade deals, improve communications between Verglane and its allies, and allow Filou to understand the Valentinian tongue. He also intended to switch to Crafter-oriented Perks based on day-to-day needs.
“Speaking of weapons, Wepy, do you have some bottles of that sweet alchemical fire in reserve?” Artemis asked him. “I need something that can quickly burn through those damned undead ships raiding my shores.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that. My crafters just contacted me with some wonderful news.” Wepwawet grinned ear to ear. “They’ve just finished reverse-engineering Valentine’s rune-cannons.”
They would threaten the Southern Powers with their own weapons.
—----
It didn’t take long for Filou to find a lead on the Hood.
All he had to do was keep his ear on the ground, both literally and figuratively. He had spent a few nights slithering into villages under the cover of darkness, listening to small talk around campfires and spying on innkeepers talking with their guests. It shamed Filou to act like a common thief, but a squire’s duty was often to do menial jobs that kept their knight’s hands clean. His duty was to protect his lady Victoire, and getting to the bottom of the lunarian conspiracy in Valentine would help with that.
According to what he heard, the Hood’s band attacked officials traveling through the Forest of Broceliande, which surrounded most of Saguenay, and unknown to many, a few of their members restocked at a nearby sympathetic village. Filou waited a while, and eventually his luck turned: a human messenger of the Free Brotherhood had visited to buy fish, venison, and ale.
“From the Lady and the Hood,” the messenger said upon paying the innkeeper with silver coins, Lord Wepwawet’s magic translating everything, “taken straight from the guvnor’s coffers.”
“Should I offer a tribute of spite first?” the innkeeper replied with a laugh. Whoever this governor was, the locals seemed to dislike him. The messenger also mentioned a ‘Lady’, but Filou didn’t recall seeing a woman on the Free Brotherhood’s wanted posters.
Filou trailed the messenger into the woods after he left. Although he couldn’t quite see his face clearly in the dark, his ears and nose let him easily track the mystery man through the woods… at least at first.
The pursuit began easily enough, but then things began to take a turn for the weird deep in the woods. Bushes sprouted across trails, the trees’ branches grew closer and obscured the moonlight, and the whistling of leaves suppressed the noise of the messenger’s steps. Although Filou continued to stalk his target, the distance between them seemed to become wider and wider.
“Your Godliness?” Filou mentally called to his god. “Am I dreaming, or…”
“You are not,” Lord Wepwawet confirmed, his voice quiet in the back of Filou’s mind. “The trees are moving.”
The woods twisted and turned around Filou. Bushes shifted places the moment he stopped looking at them, a powerful musk of mushrooms obscured the scent of his target, and the trail swiftly vanished beneath the tall grass. He struggled with the unpleasant sensation of being observed, in spite of the fact that he didn’t detect anyone nearby.
“A powerful force rules this forest and is trying to waylay you, Filou,” Lord Wepwawet warned him. “I can guide you further, but I suspect this is your last chance to turn back.”
No true aspiring knight stepped away from danger. He might never have another opportunity to catch up to the Free Brotherhood again. “I fear nothing with you at my side, Your Godliness.”
“Then follow my instructions. Take a left turn.”
Filou obeyed without question, although it took him further from the messenger rather than closer. He walked among the bushes while following his god’s instructions. He began to pick up on whispers in the whistling leaves akin to muffled words.
“A rabbit runs north, to the Lady’s grove…” Filou heard in the wind. “His sheathed steel sings of fire… the wolf-god shadows his steps…”
“What’s this witchery?” Filou wondered out loud.
“My Miracle lets you understand all forms of communication,” Lord Wepwawet explained.
A chill traveled down the wererabbit’s spine. No wonder Filou felt like he was being watched.
The trees were spying on him and reporting his movements.
Was the Hood or that Lady of his some kind of druid or magician with command over the forest? That would explain how his outlaws could operate in the woods without fear of capture.
Filou eventually made his way into a thick grove in the depths of the woods. He had long lost track of the messenger by then, but the pressure around him had never felt greater. His ears and nose picked up the slight noise of feet stepping on branches and the musk of flowers trying to hide the smell of humans.
“I mean you no harm!” Filou called out to the people he knew now surrounded him. “I come in peace!”
He heard an arrow whistling through the air in response.
Filou could tell that the arrow was meant to immobilize his leg and pin him down, so he immediately leaped out of the way… only to spot a rope tightening beneath the grass where he landed. Filou narrowly avoided a snare trap, then bolted to the side as a tree began to fall on him. He then swiftly avoided triggering a bear trap and–
The ground suddenly collapsed beneath his feet.
Filou barely had to blink as he fell into a three-meter deep pit trap and softly landed on a bed of leaves at the bottom.
How could—who set so many traps in one spot?!
“You’ve wandered where you shouldn’t, wee’rabbit,” a voice called out from the pit’s edge. Filou looked up to see two people gazing down on him: a raven-haired female elven archer pointing her bow straight at him, and a male red werefox in minstrel clothes. He carried a pipe so long it could serve as a quarterstaff and addressed Filou with a sly smirk. Filou recognized his face from one of the wanted posters. “You were almost there though. Never seen anybody get past the first two traps, let alone the third.”
“You set a quadruple trap?” Filou asked in disbelief.
“No, we set up five layers of defenses. Can never be too careful around these parts, especially with the Lady’s life on the line.”
“You dimwit, don’t mention her to outsiders!” the elf archer chided him.
“Who’s this Lady?” Filou inquired with a frown.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” the werefox asked with a chuckle. “Are you an inquisitor, coming to burn our saint?”
“Your saint?” Filou gulped. “D-do you serve Epona?”
His answer caused the minstrel to burst into laughter. “Horseface? Do I look like a straw-eater to you?”
“We follow an older faith and serve a truer goddess,” the elf archer replied with great pride. “One whose love extends to the poor and the forest people whom the Horse Goddess ignores.”
“An older faith?” Lord Wepwawet sounded highly curious all of a sudden. “Could it be…”
“I-is your Lady a goddess?” Filou inquired in surprise. Were they serving the dark lady Hel, who had helped besiege Salamandra? Or hopefully Lady Artemis?
“She is, to us.” The minstrel leaned closer to the edge to take a better look at Filou. “If you are not an inquisitor, then why are you here, wee’rabbit? Why were you tailing my man Angus so deep into our woods?”
“He’s a foreign spy,” the elf archer said. “I read his bounty. He serves the Wolf-God of the northern beastmen.”
“A scion of Grand-Loup?” The werefox minstrel squinted at Filou. “Your lord and our Lady may share a common foe in the Horse Goddess, but it hardly makes him a friend of ours.”
“I can push you out of this pit, Filou,” Lord Wepwawet warned his Champion through telepathy. He had already used his geyser magic to help Filou escape a similar predicament before. “Simply give me the signal.”
“Wait, Your Godliness.” Filou raised his hands and addressed his captors. “I–I am no threat to your Hood and Lady, whoever she is. I am Filou, a squire to Milady Victoire of Verglane!”
“So you are from Verglane?” The werefox stroked his chin. “You’re a long way from home, wee’rabbit.”
“I tell you, he’s a foreign spy,” the elf archer said, her hands tensing on her bow. “We should kill him where he stands before he brings more heat on us. We’re already in hot water with the Watch.”
“W-wait!” Filou’s hand reached out for his scimitar. He knew his god could teleport him out of trouble if needed, but fleeing now would only lead to a bust. “Can’t we talk this out?”
“Enough, Wenda,” a strange, distorted voice called out from the darkness of the woods. “Lower your bow.”
The archer immediately obeyed, and a third figure walked to the pit’s edge. They were tall and lanky, clad in green clothes woven with leaves, brown leather gloves, and boots. A dark hood covered their face, and Filou could only see darkness beneath.
Literally, a magical shroud of shadows obscured the figure’s visage, giving no hint to their gender, race, or identity.
“They’re wearing enchanted items,” Lord Wepwawet warned Filou. “Beware. They are either a mage, or in contact with one.”
“Welcome,” the figure said, their hood distorting their voice to the point that Filou couldn’t tell whether it belonged to a man or a woman. “My apologies for my merry men’s behavior. The latest patrols have left us a bit jumpy. We’ve had to deal with inquisitors wanting to slay our beloved Lady and bounty hunters seeking my head on a platter.”
“No harm done, and I understand,” Filou replied, mostly for the sake of diplomacy. “You must be the Hood?”
“Some call me that.” The mysterious figure dragged a bag to the pit’s edge and put their hand inside. “It’s good you came, Filou of Verglane, since we were going to hunt you down eventually. I’ve got a question, and I figured someone like you might provide the answer.”
The Hood opened the bag and dragged out its contents: the desiccated remains of a dead lunarian parasite.
“You wouldn’t happen to know what this thing is, do you?”
-------
Comments
Sam
That or a new war front
Thisul Mendis
Thanks for the chapter!
Void Herald
It does tie into the concept of 'local' gods mentioned a while back ;)
Publius Decius Mus
Who might be the Lady? A local goddess who has became powerful already by local standards, but has yet to reach the Nexus? That would be my first guess.
mhaj58
Feels like you missed a major opportunity to stick it to Hel. Why doesn’t she try hunting down Walter herself?
Andrew Joseph Robinson
Her? I think she'll convince herself that Wepwawet brought one down from Verglane to trick her.
TheCrazyDuck
This might be able to convince horseface that there are lunarians in her kingdom.
Andrew Joseph Robinson
So these people are following their own "Goddess"? I wonder if it's one of those Aspects we were told about a while ago.
Lucy Severine
Eyyy, new allies!
