Patrefans
Voracity from patreon
Voracity patreon

Mad Tea Party (Redux) II

🕑 Added 2022-09-07 09:12:01 +0000 UTC

Comments

VoraVora

Thanks for catching the typos! That last one is actually colloquial language.

Mikki Phoenix

I really, really, really like this chapter. I particularly like the fact that it isn't the trope-tastic "all but one of you must die, for you must fight until only one of you is left" setup, with all of the pointless internecine fighting that it entails. The fact that alliances are allowed, even encouraged, means that anyone who doesn't want to win (like Maven Alice) doesn't have to actually even fight -- and can still play a role in who wins, both by giving their shard to their favored candidate, and by attacking whomever they most want to have lose. All in all, it's a delightfully more complex tactical situation. Well done!

Mikki Phoenix

Change "skill" to "skull". First paragraph of the intro ends abruptly. "odd warped texture" to either "odd, warped texture" or "oddly warped texture" "to have sliced apart" to "to have been sliced apart" "shepherd's crook staff" to "shepherd's-crook staff" "get Esha on side" to "get Esha on my side"


More Creators