Gabbie Hanna
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11.17.23 I'm Not Sorry But I'll Apologize
🕑 Added 2024-05-28 16:00:02 +0000 UTCI got into an argument last night with two people (who owe me many apologies) about whether or not someone should apologize, even if they think they’re wrong.
To no surprise, they both believed that you don’t need to apologize to someone unless you meant to hurt them.
The double standard made me want to flip the table over. It’s always me who needs to take accountability and apologize because “intention doesn’t take away from impact.” AKA, if you hurt someone, and you didn’t mean to, you should still apologize because of the IMPACT that it had on them.
I endure as much abuse in real life as I have online at the hands of narcissistic monsters who get by every day by making themselves the victim in every situation. The kind of people who raise their voice and throw accusations, who demand you change your behavior because they’re “triggered,” but can’t accept in any scenario that THEY are triggering YOU. That their constant state of being triggered over every little thing creates an environment of hostility and fear for everyone around. The fact I have to walk on eggshells because I never know what’s going to PULL THE TRIGGER is extremely exhausting and draining.
I’m finally choosing to just step away from relationships with people who literally are against apologizing. Who slam doors and insult and accuse. Who want to say whatever they want to say, and then scream over you when you try to respond- and then call YOU manipulative.
I guess I’m done apologizing too.
Comments
MaryBeth808
Hell yeah, scrub them out of your life (if you can). That sounds exhausting. As I age, I’m kicking myself for hanging onto friendships that I’m so much happier without! And I remember my mom telling me this when I was younger but I didn’t believe her: my life has opened up to other things/people that wouldn’t have found me if I hadn’t let go of those people. It wasn’t instant. It took a while, but it’s so much better now!
Clem
Yeah nah you dont owe anyone anything
