probablyaturnip
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CH997
🕑 Added 2025-12-28 15:16:01 +0000 UTCThe next three walls went up just as easily, such a simple construction posing no challenge to the two by that point and let them for the first time take advantage of one of the perks of their station as they finished for the day, accepting the room from the guild as well as the offer of food as well, even if none of the guildmasters they’d met with that day could have been prepared for what that would mean as they arrived at their third restaurant that evening, Thera used to it by that point as they were seated, even if she couldn’t go without commenting.
“You know, I really don’t think this is what was intended when we were told the guild would comp our meals.”
“Hey, from every place we visited today, it seems like they expected us to be in each one for a few days to work. That means breakfast, lunch, and dinner. This is basically harmless,” Ben told her as he politely motioned for a nearby waiter who had been expecting them to need a bit longer with the menus, completely unprepared for what he was told, “we’ll just take one of everything you have, please.”
A small look of surprise in his eyes, Ben’s gluttony went uncommented on considering his station and instead the man walked away with the order, sure to keep the chefs busy and left the two alone to talk while they waited, Ben stretching out as he did.
“I do wish Ceselee was better at getting details about what we’d be walking into for some of these quests,” Ben sighed, his thoughts drifting to the three assignments they had left. “I like having a heads-up.”
“Stonewall isn’t exactly a central location. If we’re being asked to go on a quest then the requester is probably more worried about getting word to us quickly than they are about us getting every piece of info we might need.”
“Maybe that was true before I built a small gate network for the area, but now the world’s actual gate network is what? Half a day away for us and any of the other towns and villages I connected us to? There’s a lot more room to properly gather information to inform us.”
“True, but that also depends on the rest of the world knowing that we have something like that. It hasn’t been there super long, and given our rank, requests for us have to be going to the main branch at warriors’ tower first before being sent out. They might be sending their fastest guy to Stonewall without finding out we have a shortcut.”
“Mmh, fair. In that case, I might have to see about asking Myriad to get someone to make a note about that in our file or something… or not, because if we’re easier to get to then more people might think they can come ask us for help.”
“I mean, I wouldn’t exactly mind. Come on, this has been kind of fun so far, hasn’t it?”
“Fun might be a stretch. I will give you that of every rank one quest we’ve been given before, currently this one is the least disastrous, though we still have three stops for that to change.”
“The rest is still just construction, don’t worry so much.”
“I’ve lived on this insane world long enough that worrying has become a sort of self-preservation instinct. If I didn’t worry and mentally prepare for things to go wrong then I’d slowly go insane as each new disaster struck.”
“Mmh, one day we’re really going to have to work on fixing your view of the planet. Other than being invaded, it’s really not as bad as you’re making it out to be.”
“I don’t think you’re allowed to just say ‘other than being invaded’ as if that’s not currently the most horrifying thing happening on it in this entire world’s history.”
“Sure, but it’s not the world’s fault.”
“Fine, it’s not like there isn’t a huge list of other examples. Other worlds don’t get gates to hell opened on them and outsiders invading either.”
“Both of which were a result of someone trying to deal with the invasion, which we already said doesn’t count.”
“Not sure if I like that logic, but okay. Then there’s also how I spent an entire wedding trying to keep dozens of people from murdering my friend and every attempt on my own life.”
“Greed basically spent decades giving people reasons to want him dead, and you have the worst luck in all of reality, neither of which this world is responsible for.”
“Mmh, one of these days I’m going to figure out how to show you that this place isn’t as normal as you seem to think it is.”
“And one of these days I’m going to convince you that it’s not as bad as you seem to think for the vast majority of the people living here,” she laughed. “Besides, it’s not like there’s nothing here you enjoy. For example-”
The first round of food arrived, a few of the staff carrying multiple plates over and filling the table with them, with more still to be made as Ben looked over the selection, excitement in his eyes. As the waiters left, he and Thera both began picking away at things, taking a couple bites from each before he’d materialize new plates to put the rest of each meal on and slipped them into his rings, leaving empty dishes to be taken away just a few minutes after they’d arrived while keeping track of what he liked and disliked of each and how he’d personally change them all if given the chance, having no choice but to agree with Thera on that front.
“Okay, I can’t deny it. Wealth and power are both pretty great. Would recommend it to anyone.”
“Sure, if that puts you into a more positive mood about the planet, then that works. So then, when we’re done here, is there another restaurant you want to hit or would you rather find some other way you can abuse those?”
Ben grinned. “As fun as it was taking advantage of the guild’s meal policy, why don’t we just check out the hotel after this? We were promised a good place to stay, I want to make sure they’re true to their word.”
---
They more than were. With a large room provided with a good view, room service available at all hours, and plenty of other amenities, Ben couldn’t deny that, when a given quest allowed for such things, the guild treated its first ranks well. It was a level of comfort that he’d only gotten to see in movies back on Earth, with his few family vacations having been fun yet not nearly the five-star experience they were getting there.
“Okay, I somewhat change my mind. Taking quests that let us stay in cities might be worthwhile,” he nodded as he looked at the landscape outside of the window, the end of the day coming, even with a couple hours of sunlight left. “And, since this means I don’t need to complain to the guild about false advertising, is there anything else you’d want to go out and do? I’m sure we could find something fun if given the chance.”
“Ah, if it’s all the same to you, let’s just stay in,” Thera said from the bed, the comfort she received after laying down in it wrapping her up and refusing to let go. “It’s been a while since I’ve been able to just lay down like this; I’m not giving it up.”
“Sure, sounds good,” Ben agreed, moving beside her. “In that case, anything you want to do? I could make some games or materialize some books if you want to read anything?”
“Ha, I’m going to say no to games,” she teased. “It wouldn’t be a great break for you if you kept enjoying the same agonizing defeats you always get at home.”
“I’m not sure I’d describe them as agonizing.”
“When you go so many nights in a row without a single win in anything we try to play, it can be agonizing to watch. I’ll let you decide, though. Is there anything you’d want to do?”
Hmm, anything I’d want to do… ah, that could be fun.
“Sure, let’s go with this,” Ben said, materializing and leaving Thera to scrunch her eyes as she tried to remember what he’d called his creation the last time he made one.
“That’s the thing you showed me in the past, right? With the three pink animals building houses?”
“The words you’re looking for are projector and movie of the three little pigs, and yes. Only now, I’m way, way more skilled than when I’d made that last film and don’t need to spend days creating anything for it so let’s see, a film you could enjoy without any Earth-based context to go with it… oh, what the heck, I can think of a few classic cartoons that shouldn’t need too much explanation. Let’s go with some of those and see if any are to your taste.”
He materialized more as he spoke, the thought leading him to create rolls and rolls of film to be enjoyed before slotting the first in and beginning their movie night as the evening wore on.
Comments
Lyncher98
Tftc
Mare Matthews
Like Bioshock: Infinite stealing songs from the future to corner the entertainment market…….
Mare Matthews
Considering the amount of narrative world-building that occurs on screen in the story, once the conceit of it being made by humans is accepted (and the distance of the god figure) I can actually see it being just as powerful for this world as ours.
Mare Matthews
That is exactly what I was thinking. Primal plots - hunter being defeated, the chase. And everything that is Duck Amuck. 😊
blucube 14
Thanks for the chapter!
Nicolae
some of the original cartoons would be mental enough and lack a lot of surrounding knowledge requirements.
Krae Z Hand
We're almost to 1000 chapters. Fucking amazing
TheCrazyDuck
Honestly, if Ben put his mind to it he could instantly animate thousands of movies and even make factories that endlessly produces them, he could singlehandedly change the entertainment market forever.
SecretsOfTheVoid
Looney Tune time. Would love to see some Looney tune scenes in his fight with Oaun if he drags that demon god into Ben's divine realm.
Ves
He has to show her the entire lord of the rings one day
the void
I honestly think that planet is lucky it summoned them before brain rot set in
Logan
Tftc
Archer
The Lion King 😸
Collateral_ink
Is Ben about to spread the curse of the Rom-Com to another universe? Boyfriends of all species shall curse his name for eternity. Truly a God of Evil.
ReadingObsessed
But what's the movie?
